Monthly Archives: March 2014

March 10, 2014

The third part of Shadows is going be even later than I thought, because Jason and Elizabeth keep chattering away and I can’t make them stop. Oy. So as an apology, I’m offering a preview of a story that I’ve been working on for a while. I decided to rewrite Poisonous Dreams so I could write the sequel the way I wanted to, and plus I ended up not enjoying the original much, so I decided to give it a second shot.

I am posting the prologue of A Few Words Too Many, but I probably won’t be posting this story before May, though it’s giving me less issues than anything else I’m working on, so you never know.

Click Here: A Few Words Too Many – Prologue and please reply and tell me what you think!

This is the opening prologue to A Few Words Too Many, the rewrite of Poisonous Dreams. FWTM takes place in the spring of 2003, and I have rewritten the early LiRic relationship, because I think the show could have really gone two distinct directions that would have worked, and they chose a dumbass third option that made my Lizzie look like a jackass. So, those changes should become clear.

 

ftwm

 

Song: Sand and Water (Beth Neilsen Chapman)

 Prologue

April 2003

General Hospital: Nurse’s Station

All alone I didn’t like the feeling
All alone I sat and cried

Elizabeth Webber sat on the sofa by the elevators, staring straight ahead, ignoring the ball of nausea in her stomach. Fiercely trying to block out the memory of the test results Dr. Kelly Lee had delivered twenty minutes earlier.

Somehow, it was all a dream. This entire week of terror and nightmares would be a dream.

Any moment now, she would wake up and maybe if she were truly lucky, she would wake up months and months ago. God, if she could just go back to the fall, and wait five lousy seconds for Jason to talk to her, to apologize to her. It might all be different.

Or even further back. Maybe if she had thrown Jason’s cell phone into the harbor, he wouldn’t have taken the phone call that had sent him out the night the lights went out and she’d slept with Zander.

What she wouldn’t do for the power of time travel.

All alone I had to find some meaning
In the center of the pain I felt inside

But it wasn’t a horrible dream. It was her reality. She had gone from a man who was too stubborn to say anything that really mattered to a man who used words as a weapon.

In her loneliness, in her aching need to be loved and to matter, she’d allowed Ric Lansing into her life. He was everything Jason wasn’t, she’d told herself. He told her how beautiful she was, and how happy she made him, and how much he wanted to be with her. She’d lapped it up like a stupid little girl, too needy and desperate to see the truth

Ric Lansing was everything Jason Morgan wasn’t. He was a liar, who used all the words to pump her for information about Jason and Sonny, information she wouldn’t have given even if she’d known all the answers to the questions he wanted. He was a user, who’d only sought her out after finding her talking to Jason one night at Luke’s.

And she wished to God she’d known she was just a pawn in his game to get to Sonny Corinthos. His half-brother.

All alone I came into this world
All alone I will someday die

She had ignored all the warning signs, had ignored Jason’s words of caution because she told herself he might be jealous or something else stupid and inane to explain why Jason would say these things about a man he barely knew. Jason didn’t know Ric like she did. She had never listened to Taggart, Nikolas, her grandmother or anyone else who talked about Jason like that, why should listen to these things about Ric?

It wasn’t like she could trust Jason to tell the truth. He’d let her comfort him at Sonny’s funeral. He’d told her they would try to be more, to finally capitalize on the years of feelings and emotions, and they’d be together.

She’d thought she mattered. Until Courtney. Until the lipstick on his neck,all the days he never stopped in the penthouse while she was there…and the loft he’d bought for Courtney.

So she’d told herself Ric was a good man, and that Jason hadn’t done much but lie to her for months.

Solid stone is just sand and water, baby
Sand and water, and a million years gone by

And instead she’d learned the truth the hard way. She’d learned that Ric had targeted her to bother Jason, and when that hadn’t worked, he had pretended to sleep with Carly when she was drunk.

Not that Ric had admitted these things to her or even felt bad, but he’d taunted Sonny and Jason one night earlier that week at Kelly’s. Sonny had learned about Carly, had tracked Ric down in the courtyard and none of them had bothered to look inside the restaurant, where Elizabeth had been closing up for the night.

And Elizabeth had learned the hard way that she couldn’t trust herself.

I will see you in the light of a thousand suns
I will hear you in the sound of the waves

And now…she was pregnant. She was pregnant with Ric Lansing’s child.

She stared down at the pamphlets Kelly had handed her, after Elizabeth had broken down in tears. Not to push her one way or another, but to understand that she had options if she didn’t want the child. Adoption. Abortion.

And all Elizabeth wanted to do was crawl under the covers and stay there for the rest of her life. Anything not to make this decision.

How could she have a child? She was a waitress who lived in a broken down studio without her own bathroom, much less a kitchen. She had a degree in art, but what the hell could she do with that? Of course she couldn’t have this baby. She’d have to have an abortion. There was no other choice.

I will know you when I come, as we all will come
Through the doors beyond the grave

And yet, how could she blame an innocent life for the crimes of its parents? This child was half her, and despite her many failings, she still had time to pull her life together. She had options. She could get her teacher’s certification. She could go into the nursing program like her grandmother kept hinting.

Ric Lansing didn’t have to be a part of this child’s life.

And, maybe it was selfish, but if she had this child…if Elizabeth became a mother, there would finally be someone in this world who loved her.

Just the way she was.

Elm Street Pier

Her heart heavy, her body tired and her mind racing with ways to keep this pregnancy a secret from the worst choice of her life, Elizabeth blindly walked towards Kelly’s, stopping at the top of the stairs to the Elm Street Pier when she heard voices.

Familiar voices.

Hanging back around the corner, Elizabeth waited for Ric Lansing and whoever he was with to disappear so she could head to work.

“What have I told you about seeking me out in public?” Ric demanded.

“You like it better when we’re all by ourselves in bed,” a female voice purred, and the pit in Elizabeth’s stomach grew, burning. She knew that voice.

All alone I heal this heart of sorrow
All alone I raise this child

“Well…” God she knew that tone. That disgusting charming tone he used when he was flirting. When he was convincing her she was the only woman in his life. “That may be true,” Ric continued. “But things are tense right now, and if anyone sees us talking…”

“You mean the little twit,” Faith Roscoe purred. “I thought you were gonna cut her loose.”

Oh, she was going to be sick. She was going to lose it, and just start heaving for all the world to hear.

“I was,” Ric said. “But she’s amusing, and while it doesn’t seem to bother Morgan much I’m screwing his ex-bed buddy, I know Sonny can’t stand it, so she’s worth the trouble.”

Elizabeth sank to her knees, wishing she were anywhere else in the world. She’d known she’d been targeted to bother Jason, but to hear him…to hear him put it that way, God, she just wanted to set herself on fire.

Flesh and bone, he’s just
Bursting towards tomorrow

“You’re lucky I’m so understanding,” Faith remarked. “If I thought you gave a damn about her, I might decide to…take preventative measures.”

Tears slid down Elizabeth’s cheeks, and she just wanted to disappear. She’d been so stupid. She should have listened to Jason. She should have known him better. She should have trusted him.

“Now, now. You can’t make any waves.” His voice lowered slightly and Elizabeth couldn’t really make out words other than “danger, Families, money.”

And his laughter fills my world and wears your smile

Their voices finally faded, and she heard footsteps indicating they were moving out further onto the pier. Even when she was sure they were gone, she remained on the ground, her arms wrapped around herself, tears sliding down her cheeks.

That was the father of her child, who talked about screwing her to annoy someone else. She hadn’t meant anything to him, not even a little.

If she could just curl up into a ball and fade into nothing, it might be for the best.

I will see you in the light of a thousand suns
I will hear you in the sound of the waves

She heard footsteps on the stairs, and told herself to get up, to move, but her legs were frozen, her brain sluggish. When the steps stopped in front her, she opened her eyes and saw the boots a few feet from her.

If Elizabeth possessed any energy left to be embarrassed, she might have actually burst into flames as she watched Jason Morgan crouch in front her, his eyes concerned.

She was too shattered to care.

“Elizabeth,” he said quietly. “How long have you been here?”

I will know you when I come, as we all will come
Through the doors beyond the grave

And oh, God…he must have heard. Oh, God. She opened her mouth to respond, to say something…anything to stop this torment. She could lie to him—she’d only just gotten here, she’d tripped and stumbled.

But she just couldn’t drag it out of herself. “Long enough,” she murmured.

All alone I came into this world

She heard Jason’s inhale of breath, and wondered what he thought of her being targeted because of him. He’d always said his enemies would use her to get to him, he probably hadn’t thought it be through sex and that she’d let them.

“I wish I could blame you,” she said softly, keeping her eyes on the ground, not meeting his gaze. “That Ric only came for me because I…because of you. But I can’t.” Her breath was shaky as she slowly exhaled. “Because you told me, and I ignored you.”

“I am so…” He stopped, and slid his hands under her elbows to help her stand. “Elizabeth—”

All alone I will someday die

“There’s nothing you can say.” Another tear slid down her cheek. “I heard most of it at Kelly’s earlier this week, but you know…he didn’t put it that way then.” She struggled to keep from sinking back to the ground. “He just told you he’d had to use Carly when you didn’t seem to give a damn about me.”

“I—” But Jason didn’t seem to know what say.

“It’s okay.” Elizabeth offered a shaky smile. “Really. I needed…” She took a deep breath, trying not to collapse under the weight of the devastation of her life, of her dreams. “I needed to hear him put it that way. To know that he’d been sleeping with other women, with Faith Roscoe. I hadn’t broken up with yet, you know. I didn’t think I could be in the same room with him, I was afraid he’d explain away his words to you and Sonny the way he always seemed to explain everything else. I was afraid I might believe him because I needed…” She pressed her lips together. “But now I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that I outlived my usefulness a long time ago, and I was only kept around for amusement.”

Solid stone is just sand and water, baby

After a long moment of silence, Jason cleared his throat. “Can I—Can I give you a ride somewhere?”

No. Taking a ride from Jason Morgan when her life had shattered three years ago had been the reason she was in this mess. For her own sanity, she could not let him be her sounding board. He already thought her to be pathetic, to be desperate, if he knew she was pregnant by Ric, he’d feel sorry for her. He’d pity her.

And she would really throw herself into the harbor at that point.

“No.” When her voice was weak, she forced herself to take a deep breath. “No. Thank you for being concerned, but I think that sometimes the truth is better…” She looked at him now, for the first time, meeting those beautiful eyes that had broken her heart. “Sometimes the truth is better, even when it’s harsh. I have no illusions left.” Another tear escaped her eye, and she found her lips curving into a smile. “I never mattered at all.”

Sand and water and a million years gone by

Due to the extreme length of I Shall Believe (33 chapters and a prologue) and it’s relative old popularity, I am reposting it in chunks and also posting it for the first time at The Road to Nowhere, so it’ll be posted more slowly than my other stories, but I’m working on it. The prologue is now up. You can start the story by clicking here: I Shall Believe

This entry is part 1 of 34 in the I Shall Believe

Song: I Shall Believe by Sheryl Crow

November 2003

General Hospital: Cameron Lewis’s Office

Come to me now
And lay your hands over me

“When I was in the coma,” Carly Corinthos began hesitantly, “I had these…I guess you could say that they were dreams. But they felt…they felt so real.”

She glanced over at Dr. Cameron Lewis who just nodded and indicated she should continue. “I was with another man and I lived another life,” Carly continued. “It was almost like reliving memories. I remembered his touch, his kiss, the day he proposed, when I found out I was pregnant…” her breath hitched. “The day he died.”

“And when you woke up?” Cameron pressed.

“I still remembered those memories, those feelings but…” she hesitated again and stared at her hands. “I didn’t remember feelings from this life. The memories are there. But notthe feelings behind them.” She looked at her therapist. “What do you think that means?”

Elizabeth Webber’s Studio

Even if it’s a lie
Say it will be alright

Elizabeth Lansing sank slowly onto the old couch in her drafty studio, her lips pressed firmly together. Her eyes were trained on the white stick in her hands.

A plus sign.

This was bad, this was so bad. This was very, very bad.

Haye’s Landing House

And I shall believe

There was something about this life that called to Courtney Matthews-Morgan. Something about the certainty that when she woke up in her bedroom at the rented house with the knowledge that Brian Beck would be stopping by after breakfast.

It shouldn’t be an attractive idea but was it so wrong to like the idea that a man could have a normal schedule? That his life wasn’t tied to a cell phone? That he wouldn’t run away in the middle of the night with the option of him never coming home?

General Hospital: Cameron Lewis’s Office

I’m broken in two
And I know you’re on to me

“Well, it’s never easy to say, Carly,” Cameron answered. “Sometimes our dreams are pipelines into our subconscious and sometimes they’re just dreams. Fantasies.”

Carly sighed. “But my feelings…I have a husband. Two children. And I can’t…there’s nothing there. Isn’t there something wrong with that?”

Elizabeth Webber’s Studio

That I only come home
When I’m so all alone

Elizabeth started to pace, a hand braced over her flat abdomen. Pregnancy was…it was not a good thing. Not right now. Not when her life had been so out of control she’d slept with three men.

Her eyes closed as the thought she’d been avoiding finally surfaced. Three men. Three candidates.

She sank back onto the couch, fear in her eyes.

Haye’s Landing House

But I do believe

Courtney leaned her head against the glass window that looked out over the front yard of her little safe haven. Michael and Brian were on the lawn, playing catch. Michael was laughing like he hadn’t laughed in months.

Morgan’s soft cries caught her attention and she went to check on her nephew.

If she closed her eyes for just a moment, she could almost believe this was her life.

Normal. Safe.

General Hospital: Cameron Lewis’s Office

That not everything is gonna be the way
You think it ought to be

“I don’t want to tell you there’s something wrong with you when I can’t possibly make that kind of diagnosis after one session,” Cameron told her. “But I do feel that there is something psychosomatic going on.”

“What do you mean by that?” Carly asked hesitantly.

“I know a bit about you,” Cameron replied. “I know about the high-risk pregnancy you went through, the stress you’re now dealing with after your coma and with your estranged husband imprisoned for your shooting. Your sister-in-law has taken your children to another town.”

“I should miss them,” Carly said. “I remember having the feelings of love for them both but I don’t have the actual feelings anymore. And I just can’t…Jason thinks I should call Courtney and tell her to bring them home but part of me thinks…” she paused and looked away. “Part of me thinks they’re better off where they are.”

Elizabeth Webber’s Studio

It seems like every time I try to make it right
It all comes down on me

Elizabeth threw out the test and tugged on her red coat. There was no point in getting all upset about this…home pregnancies were notorious for being wrong.

She just had to go to the hospital and find out for sure.

And then she’d find out how far along she was and when she knew that…

Then she’d panic.

Haye’s Landing House

Please say honestly you won’t give up on me
And I shall believe

“Aunt Courtney!” Michael burst into the front room exuberantly. “Brian says that they get a lot of snow here and he says he can take me sledding!”

Courtney smiled and looked at the dark-haired man standing behind her nephew with a grin. “Well, when does it snow?”

“Should come any day now,” Brian remarked in that easy going tone she’d become accustomed to. His brown eyes sparkled. “I’d be more than happy to take the lady of the house sledding as well.”

“Yeah, Aunt Courtney, we could all go!” Michael said urgently. He grabbed her hand jumped up and down excitedly. “Please!”

“Well, if it means that much to you…” Courtney met Brian’s eyes and was startled to feel a slight flutter in her stomach.

That was not a good sign.

General Hospital: Cameron Lewis’s Office

And I shall believe

“Why do you say that?” Cameron asked curiously. “They’re your children. You remember loving them, you remember raising Michael at least.”

Carly sighed and crossed her legs at the ankle, trying to find a comfortable position. “But right now, there’s nothing there and Michael looks at me with all this love and the guilt…it overwhelms me because he expects–and he deserves for his mother to look at him the same way and right now I can’t. So he’s better off with someone who can.”

Elm Street Pier

Open the door
And show me your face tonight

Elizabeth hurried down the stairs and was in such a hurry to get to the other side of the docks that she almost didn’t hear Jason Morgan call out to her.

She stopped in her tracks and turned. “Hey.”

“You seem to be in a hurry,” he said quietly.

She nodded, licked her lips nervously, her eyes darting anywhere but his face. “It’s cold,” she said lamely.

Jason nodded and rubbed the back of his neck. “How are you?”

“I’m fine.” Elizabeth took a deep breath. “You?”

“Fine,” he answered. He knew she was lying and he thought she knew he was lying as well. But they’d been playing this polite game for a while and he wasn’t about to go back to where they’d once been.

It wasn’t their old friendship but it certainly wasn’t the blind hatred of the past year.

Haye’s Landing House

I know it’s true
No one heals me like you

Courtney handed Brian a steaming cup of hot chocolate. “I don’t have any coffee,” she told him.

He nodded and his eyes followed her across the room. “Did I do anything wrong?”

Frowning, she turned back to him. “Why would you ask that?”

“Because you won’t look me in the eyes.”

She flushed. “You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s just…” Courtney sighed and looked at him, being careful to meet his gaze head on. “You make me feel things I shouldn’t.”

General Hospital: Cameron Lewis’s Office

And you hold the key

Cameron nodded. “That’s a very natural reaction and there’s truth to that. Your son has had a very emotional short life, the less upheaval, the better for him.” He set aside his note pad and peered at Carly closely. “Tell me about your marriage before the shooting.”

“We were separated,” Carly said flatly. “I remember that it wasn’t what I wanted but Sonny wanted his family safe.” She chucked bitterly. “I can’t tell you how often I’ve heard the phrase in the last four years.”

“And it bothers you that Sonny puts the safety above your happiness.”

“Yes,” Carly said. “You get it. Finally!” She stood and started to pace. “Maybe now that I don’t have the love for him…I can look at this situation objectively.”

“And maybe that’s why you can’t remember that love to begin with,” Cameron suggested.

Elm Street Pier

Never again
would I turn away from you

“How’s Carly?” Elizabeth inquired. She slid her hands in her pockets and kept her eyes on the wooden planks of the docks.

“She’s fine,” Jason answered.

He was fine, she was fine, Carly was fine. It made her want to scream because none of them were fine. Jason–newly married–was already separated from his wife. Carly couldn’t remember any emotions and Elizabeth was pregnant with…someone’s child.

He saw the flash of something in her eyes. “Is something wrong?”

“No,” Elizabeth said quickly. Too quickly and they both knew it. He narrowed his eyes and almost looked like he was going to press the issue. She cleared her throat nervously. “I have to go.”

Haye’s Landing House

I’m so heavy tonight
But your love is alright

The silence was almost unbearable and if there anything she hated, it was the silence. She was always talking, always trying to fill silences and it was something she knew annoyed Jason.

“Say something,” Courtney said softly. She tucked her hair behind her ears and crossed her arms, almost hugging herself.

“I’m not sure what I should say,” Brian said after a moment. “You–as you have told me so often–are a married woman and I respect the vows of marriage.”

She nodded. “Okay. Then we can just drop this subject.” She started past him but he caught her elbow.

“But you make me feel things I shouldn’t either,” he finished in a quiet voice, his stare unnerving her.

General Hospital: Cameron Lewis’s Office

And I do believe

Carly nodded. “You think this ties back into the psychosomatic thing from earlier. That I don’t want to remember how I feel about my family because it blinds me to the situation. That it makes me do things that aren’t right for me because I want to do what’s right for them.”

“It’s certainly something to be looked at,” Cameron agreed. “Tell me about yourself. Before the marriage. Before you were Sonny’s wife, who were you?”

Carly sank into her seat, her eyes sad. “I can hardly remember who I used to be.” She focused on her therapist. “That’s probably not a good thing, huh?”

General Hospital: Lynn Meadow’s Office

That not everything is gonna be the way
You think it ought to be

Elizabeth pulled her sleeve down and looked at Dr. Meadows. “When will I have the results?”

Her obstetrician sighed. “I’ll put a rush on them. If you are pregnant again, we need to monitor it carefully.”

Elizabeth’s eyes widened in fear. “You said there was no damage from before.”

“There’s not. But we’d just like to be sure.” Dr. Meadows touched her arm. “Elizabeth, from the symptoms you’ve given, the time you’ve been late and the pregnancy positive…”

“You think I’m probably pregnant,” Elizabeth finished softly. “Yeah. I figured.”

Dr. Meadows handed her a stack of pamphlets. “You might still have some of these but there’s some things in there you might want to read about pregnancy after miscarriages and whatnot.”

Elizabeth nodded. “Thanks. You have my new number?”

The doctor nodded. “We’ll call you when we have the results.”

Haye’s Landing House

It seems like every time I try to make it right
It all comes down on me

Courtney pulled away from Brian slowly and tore her eyes from him. “Brian–”

“But you are a married woman and my feelings really have no importance, do they?” he said. He stepped away from her.

“Don’t say that!” Courtney cried out, surprising them both. “They do. And so do mine. I just…don’t know what to think.”

“Why don’t you stop thinking and just trust the way you feel?” Brian asked.

“I can’t,” she whispered. She stepped away from him. “You’d better go.”

General Hospital: Cameron Lewis’s Office

Please say honestly
You won’t give up on me

“Your hour’s up,” Cameron said. He stood. “I feel like we’ve gotten a real good start here, Carly. I’d like you to come back.”

Carly nodded. “I will come back. Thank you, Dr. Lewis.”

She left his office and moved towards the elevators. Her head was down, digging through her purse for her car keys and she didn’t see Elizabeth coming towards her.

And I shall believe

Elizabeth was flipping through the stack of pamphlets, intending only to weed out those she didn’t already have. It worried her that Dr. Meadows wanted to monitor this pregnancy so closely–it had never occurred to her that her miscarriage might weigh negatively.

She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t see Carly.

They slammed into each other. Carly’s keys went flying and so did the pamphlets.

I shall believe

Elizabeth watched in horror as they fell to the ground almost in slow motion.

Carly stooped down and started to gather them. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t–” She broke off and looked up at the panic-stricken brunette. “Elizabeth…you’re pregnant?”

Elizabeth nodded slowly. “Yeah,” she whispered.

Carly stood up and handed the pamphlets to her. “It seems so…I don’t know how to ask this.” She took a deep breath. “Who is the father?”

“I don’t know,” Elizabeth admitted, terrified.

And I shall believe

 

March 9, 2014

I’ve noticed that quite a few people have signed up to receive emails about new posts to this site. I’m super excited about, but somewhat concerned as I still have stories to move over, and I’ve saved my longest stories for last. I Shall Believe is about thirty chapters, Sanctuary is more than twenty chapters, Yesterdays is fifteen chapters, and Intoxication is about the same length.

I’m not sure about the subscription options, if you can only have them sent once a week, or whatnot, so I just wanted to warn anyone who’s receiving multiple emails from me over the next two months while I’ll finish moving stories. I cannot control subscription options, and if I had realized that I would have figured out a different method to keep people updated.  Those kinds of emails will be temporary, because once the site is completely moved, you’ll only get maybe one or two a week.

Shadows might be slightly late. Due to the changes in my outline, I had to readjust some of the later scenes, so they’re taking longer. I also have a presentation due tomorrow and a German paper due on Wednesday, so I have to spend most of today working on those things (and I already overslept and procrastinated by reading fanfiction, oy. I suck.) Shadows shouldn’t be too super late. I’ll write a scene here and there, and hopefully it’ll be up by Tuesday.

The poll has spoken, haha, and now that North Star is moved over (because I already started to do so), I Shall Believe is next.

March 7, 2014

This entry is part 8 of 8 in the North Star

This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
— Bless the Broken Road, Rascal Flatts

Patrick made his way into the lab, exhausted and hoping that Robin had made some progress. If she hadn’t, he would have to think of way to tell Elizabeth Spencer that her son would probably not survive the night.

Thoughts of Elizabeth and Cameron slipped from his mind when he saw Robin lying in a heap on the floor. Everything stopped, everything froze. His vision narrowed and for a moment in time, he couldn’t move.

When he saw her head move a little, heard the moan escape through her lips, it broke the moment and practically flew across the room to kneel at her side. “Robin, wake up, okay? You have to wake up–” He broke off and took a deep, stabilizing breath before lifting her into his arms and moving quickly towards the door.

“I knew she should have gone home,” Robert seethed as he paced out front of Robin’s hospital room. “I should have tied her up, tossed her in the car and then handcuffed her to something steel as far away from this hospital as possible.”

“Hey, she wouldn’t have gone,” Luke Spencer assured his old friend. “And she’s Anna’s daughter so she would figured out a way to free herself and come back here because she’s just that kind of person.”

“I ought to kill you,” Mac muttered to Luke. “Bringing this virus here–why can’t you have normal vacation like everyone else?”

“Oh, believe me,” Luke nodded, “Its tropical islands and drinks with umbrellas from here on out.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Did Jason and Carly make any progress in the islands?”

“I haven’t heard from them since they said they found the antidote.” Robert started to pace again. “Why we’re depending on a thug and a woman who’s no better than a common–”

“A common what?” Carly demanded shrilly as she stalked up to them. “Maybe for that I’ll just give the antidote to my kids and tell you and the rest of the hospital to go to hell–”

“I know places to hide a body,” Robert threatened, stepping up to the shorter woman. “Where no one will ever find you.”

“Okay, okay…” Luke eased between them. “Caroline, this isn’t the time to be yourself,” he admonished. “Robin’s sick and the old dinosaur over here gets touchy when his daughter’s dying.”

Carly frowned and glanced towards the door. She stepped up to the window and peered inside to see Patrick seated by an unconscious Robin. “She wasn’t anywhere near the patients, though. I–” she flicked a glance back at the trio of men gathered behind her. “I was talking to Mama about the virus before Jason and I left and she was talking about how glad she was Robin would be in the lab. How did she contract it?”

“She was in the ER helping out until we quarantined,” Mac answered with a frown of his own. “Why does that matter?”

“She didn’t figure out the serum?” Carly asked. “I thought that’s what she was working on–”

“She did,” Robert nodded. “But we had to give it to the worst case and that was Cameron Webber. He’s recovering so if Robin had just had more time–” he shook his head. “Why does that matter? Give me the antidote.” He held out his hand.

“It matters because Robin happens to matter to people I care about.” Carly planted her hands on her hips. “Look, I don’t like her, I don’t plan on liking her but Sonny cares about her, Jason always will and does most of the hospital staff, including my mother. I don’t want her to die.” Her lips curved into a smirk. “Life is more fun with her around.” She dug into her pocket and removed a few vials of the antidote. “Jason has the rest. I was taking this up to pediatrics for Morgan, Kristina and Cameron when I over heard the conversation.” She handed Robert one of the vials. “But since Cameron doesn’t need it anymore…”

Robert snatched it from her hand and went into the room, followed by Mac. Luke smiled at Carly. “Caroline, you do me proud sometimes. Going out there, finding an antidote and giving it to your worst enemy. What a mature thing to do.”

Carly wrinkled her nose. “Please. You’re making me nauseous.” She tucked the vials away in her pocket. “I’m not stupid, Luke. I know exactly what’s in the past and I’m just saying I don’t need another casualty on my head.” She shrugged uncomfortably. “But as far as Robin needs to know, Jason found the antidote and brought it back, are we clear?”

“How much do we even know about this?” Patrick demanded as he nervously watched Robert inject the liquid into Robin’s IV. “What if it makes her worse?”

Robert shook his head. “Carly took the antidote and her fever broke in less than ten minutes. And if she and Jason hadn’t taken their sweet time getting here, maybe Robin never would fell ill in the first place.” He set the syringe aside and folded his arms. “You can go check on your other patients now, Dr. Drake.”

“I don’t think so,” Patrick sat on the edge of Robin’s bed and monitored her vitals as the antidote slowly worked its way through her body.

Mac shifted. “The next time this happens, we’ll take your route,” he told his brother. “We’ll tie her up and then have Anna stand guard. She’ll keep Robin from escaping.”

“Deal.”

Robin moved her head from side to side, her lips parting on a small moan. “My head…”

Patrick immediately moved to inject some painkillers into her IV line. “That should help,” he told her before taking his place at her side again. “Welcome back, Dr. Scorpio.”

“Patrick…” Robin blinked her eyes and licked her lips. “How long…?”

“Two days,” Patrick reached for her hand and squeezed it. “You know, if you wanted my attention, all you had to was ask. No need to get all dramatic.”

She laughed weakly. “Still the most arrogant…” her eyes flickered for a moment and she focused on her father. “Daddy…?”

“Hey, Baby.” Robert knelt at her side and kissed her forehead. “You do know that thanks to you, your mother is probably over the Atlantic now and when she’s not worrying about you, I imagine she’s devising creative ways to display my head once she’s ripped it from my body.”

“No less than you deserve,” Robin murmured but with the anger of previous conversations. “The…I had a syringe…?”

“We found it.” Patrick smoothed her hair out of her face and garnered looks of genuine interest from the Scorpio men behind him. “And Elizabeth agreed to give it to Cameron. He’s recovering.”

She closed her eyes. “Thank God. I thought…” Her eyes flickered opened again. “Then how…?”

“Carly and Jason brought the antidote back from the Markham islands,” Robert supplied.

“Oops,” Luke said from the doorway. “I was supposed to tell you that Carly had nothing to do with it.”

Robin managed another weak laugh. “I owe my life to Carly. Yeah, that figures.” She shifted and looked back at Patrick. “What about the rest of the patients?”

“I…” Patrick coughed. “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?” Robin asked, confused. “Why?”

“Because Junior Drake hasn’t left this room,” Luke supplied cheerfully, slapping Patrick on the back. “That’s dedication. Why don’t Bubba, me and Daddy Dearest go find out about those patients for you?” He grabbed Robert’s elbow and yanked him towards the door.

“Wait a second, she just woke up–” Robert was snarling as Luke dragged him down the hall.

“Luke has all the subtlety of a freight train,” Mac sighed. He leaned over Robin and kissed her forehead. “If you ever scare me like that again, I might have to lock you in a room padded with cotton just so I can feel safe.” He eyed Patrick for a long moment before looking back at Robin. “Anna will be landing in an hour or so and Felicia’s coming right after her so I’d better head to the airport.”

“Yeah, start thinking of excuses for why you let Georgie get married,” Robin said wryly as her uncle left. She focused on Patrick. “You should probably get some sleep.”

Patrick exhaled slowly and shook his head. “You’re deranged. You nearly died and you’re telling me to get some sleep.” He looked down at their hands and seemed to be surprised that they were stilled joined.

“How’s Noah?” Robin asked softly.

“As a matter of fact, I was coming to tell you that he agreed to let me test to be a donor.” He looked away. “But then you were on the floor so it didn’t seem important anymore.” He cleared his throat. “But I’m glad you’re feeling better. I should probably check on him and the rest of my patients.”

“Patrick…” Robin hesitated and thought about that moment in the lab when they’d both been exhausted and something had passed between them that neither were ready for.

“You can’t possibly be this blind. Why do you think I don’t want any thing to happen to you?”

She almost brought it up but at the last moment, she decided that she wanted to see where this might go on their own terms–without the drama of an epidemic, his father’s illness and her father’s return from the dead.

“I think when I’m feeling better,” Robin said instead, “that you should let me take you out to dinner.”

Patrick grinned. “Will this one actually have an ending I’ll like?”

Robin mirrored his smile. “We’ll see.”

This entry is part 7 of 8 in the North Star

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
— Bless the Broken Road, Rascal Flatts

Elizabeth was leaning up against the wall, staring at nothing at all. Her son lay on his back in the small crib, howling. She’d exhausted tears long ago and was now praying for relief.

Patrick entered. “Robin was worried,” he remarked. He went to Cameron’s side and studied the toddler’s chart for a long moment before doing something with the IV line.

“What are you doing?” Elizabeth asked dully.

“Giving him a sedative so that he’ll sleep through the worst of it,” Patrick said. “The respirator has helped but his throat is inflamed and the screaming is only making it worse so this will be better for him.”

Elizabeth sat up straight and rubbed her eyes, smiling faintly as Cameron’s cries faded until he slipped into sleep. “Is Robin…is she any closer?”

“She’s been trying to isolate the virus but its slow going. There was something about studying Luke’s blood but I’ve been checking on patients so I wasn’t in that meeting.”

“Luke?” Elizabeth asked. “Is he sick too? I’m sorry–but I haven’t left this room since Cameron was admitted. I should have gone to isolation but…” she shrugged helplessly. “He’s my baby.”

Patrick nodded. “Well, apparently Luke brought the virus back from his vacation somehow and has been fighting it off so we’ll see. Children and the elderly will get whatever treatment we have first, okay?”

“I know…it’s just…” Elizabeth shook her head. “It’s just hard to listen to him crying and not be able to fix it.” She rubbed her hands together. “Robin–I wanted to check on her–I heard about her father and–is she okay?”

“She’s in the denial stage right now,” Patrick studied Cameron’s chart for another moment before frowning down at the small body. “I think she’s trying to avoid it while this crisis is going on. It seems to be going method of dealing.”

“There are only two good things about this entire situation,” Elizabeth said. “Lucky wasn’t around Luke or Cameron before we were quarantined and well…” she smirked. “Carly wasn’t in the hospital either. I already had to live across the hall from her once–being quarantined with her would be my own personal hell.”

Noah struggled from his bed and started for the door only to be waylaid by his son.

“Get back in there,” Patrick took his father’s elbow and steered him back. “You insisted on staying here to recover, then recover.”

“I’d be more help out there,” Noah argued but he didn’t have the energy to push past his son. “I can’t sit in here for days while chaos reigns out there.”

“Well, you’re going to have to,” Patrick helped him back into bed before pulling Noah’s chart from the foot of bed. “Your vitals were strong the last time Elizabeth checked you–”

“I heard about her son,” Noah cut in, “is he okay?”

“He’s not doing well,” Patrick sighed. He replaced the chart. “This strain is hard on the young, but most illnesses are. We form some sort of treatment, he’ll have a shot. Otherwise…” he shook his head. “I’m glad I don’t have kids and seeing Elizabeth Spencer upstairs in that room just makes me all that more certain that I don’t want them.”

“They’re a pain in the ass, but they’re generally worth it,” Noah said. “You’ll change your mind.”

“No, I won’t.” Patrick started for the door.

“You don’t have to have children to be vulnerable to loss, Patrick,” Noah called after him. His son turned, his hand on the door. “We both know that better than anyone.” Noah paused. “How’s Robin? Bobbie told me about her father.”

“She was dealing with it before this all began, now she’s avoiding it.” Patrick shrugged. “She’s stronger than she looks.” He looked away. “Get some sleep.”

When the door shut behind him, Noah leaned back against his pillows.

“How could I live with myself if my selfishness cost me my son?”

“And how will Patrick be able to live with himself when you die and he could have saved you?”

Mac found Patrick examining Lulu Spencer. He waited for the doctor to exit the room. “They told me at Admitting that you’re Cameron Webber’s doctor on record.”

“One of them,” Patrick started down the hall and Mac fell into step next to him. “How do you know him?”

“Elizabeth’s husband is one of my officers and they won’t let him in. He wanted an update straight from you, Elizabeth won’t give him any straight answers.” Mac stepped in front of Patrick. “He’s bad, isn’t he?”

Patrick sighed. “Yeah–along with Lulu Spencer, Dillon Quartermaine and Morgan Corinthos, all four of them are in the worse condition. They’re young and their bodies can’t find the disease as well. They don’t have enough antibodies. If we don’t come up with some sort of treatment…”

“Robin’s working on that, isn’t she?” Mac cast a long look down the hall where he knew the labs were located. “I wish she were anywhere but here.”

“She’s not working near the patients,” Patrick assured him. “She wanted to check on them but I convinced her not to.”

Mac frowned. “I didn’t realize you had that sort of influence over my niece. She’s as stubborn as the rest of the Scorpios.” Filing that information away for later, he shook his head. “If anyone can find a treatment, Robin can.”

Robin finished loading the syringe with liquid and exhaled slowly. “Well–it’s start.”

She tucked the syringe into her lab coat pocket and stood. As soon as her feet hit the ground, she was struck with a wave of vertigo. “No…” Robin shook her head resolutely. For the past hour, she’d felt warm and a little dizzy but she’d worked through it, determined to get this formula created and to one of the patients to test.

She’d come too far to fail now.

Robin took a deep breath and started for the door.

She never made it.

This entry is part 6 of 8 in the North Star

But you just smile and take my hand
You’ve been there you understand
It’s all part of a grander plan that is coming true
— Bless the Broken Road, Rascal Flatts

Noah was surprised when Bobbie slipped into his room that evening. “I would have thought you were on duty.”

“I am,” she sighed, exhausted. She sat in the chair next to his bed. “But we’ve taken care of everything we can for now. Until the research staff makes some headway, there’s not much else we’ll be able to do.” She rubbed her eyes. “I’ve had a few people in my life come back from the dead, I’m not sure if you know that.”

“It does seem to be a trend in this town,” Noah agreed. “Who’s back this time?”

“I mean, we have an overabundance of people who ought to be six feet under,” Bobbie continued. “Laura came back twice, Carly came back at least once that I can think of, Roy came back, I believe Alan faked his own death at one time, Brenda, Anna came back and Stavros Cassadine–don’t even get me started on that but I felt sure that least Robert Scorpio was dead because he would never leave Robin to grow up without him.”

“But he was alive,” Noah stated.

“And he’s with the organization that’s quarantining the hospital, if you can believe that irony.” Bobbie rubbed her eyes. “And I thought January was the month from hell.”

“Yeah? What happened in January?”

“My son came out,” Bobbie replied. “He told me in the middle of an entire police station that he was gay.” She laughed ruefully. “As if giving me Carly as a child wasn’t enough.”

“Well, I’m sorry you feel that way, Robin,” Robert said, “but you will give me the chance to at least explain what happened.”

“The way you gave me a chance to grow up with my father?” Robin snorted and set a slide onto the stage of her microscope. “Maybe in fourteen years.”

“Robin, you owe me the opportunity–”

“I don’t owe you anything.” Robin slammed her pen down and got to her feet. “You disappear for most of my life and you show up, bark orders at me, treat me like I’m nothing to you and you suddenly decide that I owe you something? Well, I’m sorry, Dad, but we’ve both changed since you died.”

“I left to protect you,” Robert told her. “To protect you and your uncle. I didn’t know for sure that everyone had been killed in the explosion and if they thought I was dead, you would be safe.”

“And you stayed away because?” Robin demanded. “I notice you’re not so focused on protecting me and Uncle Mac that you’re staying away now.”

“Once Anna turned up and regained her memory and no attempted to harm her or you, I knew you would be safe. And by then, it was easier to let you believe I was dead. You had lived more time without me than you had with me.”

“Wow…” Robin shook her head. “I can’t believe that you are my father, I can’t believe that you are the same man that I knew when I was fifteen. I just–” She turned her back. “I have work to do now, so if you’d just leave me alone.”

“I don’t expect you to understand, Robin–”

“Well, good–because I don’t. I don’t get how you can let me believe that you were dead.” She whirled around. “Do you have any idea what I’ve been through since you’ve been gone? My boyfriend died of AIDS, Dad. And I tested positive for HIV.”

Robert exhaled slowly. “I know and it was hard not to come back I found that out but it was for the best, Robin, you must believe that–”

“Uncle Mac was shot, he got married, Dad and he got divorced-and he was burned in a fire. Did you know any of that? Did you even care to find out?”

“There isn’t much I don’t know about you, Robin,” Robert told her. “But it doesn’t change my mind about making the right decision–”

“No, I didn’t think it would because that’s something we still have in common–we’re stubborn.” Robin smiled bitterly. “And I’m pretty damn sure I would like you to leave. Now.”

The door to the lab slid open and Patrick stepped in. At seeing Robin with Robert, he stopped. “I’ll come back.”

“There’s no need, my father was just leaving.” Robin folded her arms. “I just have one more question, before you go. Does Mom know you’re alive? That her marriage to David was invalid because you are still alive?”

Robert sighed. “No, Anna does not know.”

Robin nodded. “I didn’t think so–she would have told me at least.” She flicked her gaze to Patrick. “Did you need something?”

“Ah…,” Unused to discomfort, Patrick shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “I was just checking on Robin–her progress, I mean.”
“You can go, now, Dad. We have nothing else to talk about.”

Robert waited a moment but when he realized she wouldn’t relent, he left, brushing past Patrick.

“I haven’t made any progress,” Robin said immediately. “There’s just not enough information and the WHO is being stingy about turning anything over–”

“I’m not–if you’d made any, you would have said something. I saw your dad heading in this direction and I just–” Patrick shifted again, clearly out of his element. “I wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

“No, I’m not,” Robin muttered. She sat back on her stool and stared at her fingers. “He stayed away to protect me and when he knew I’d be safe, he’d decided that it was easier to let me believe he was dead. And my mother–” Robin closed her eyes. “Mom doesn’t even know he’s alive. Her marriage is invalid. I mean they’re divorced now but it’s the principle of the thing. You don’t let your wife believe you’re dead, you don’t let your child, your family, the people who love you–” her voice cracked and she put her heads in her hands. “I am so tired of this.”

Patrick approached her and hesitantly put a hand on her shoulder. “I can’t imagine what it’s like to lose a parent and then find out that they’ve been alive all along and never told you.”

“It’s like having your whole world ripped out from underneath you,” she murmured. “And he doesn’t even understand why. He’s so damn stubborn, so sure that he’s right.”

“Well, at least now I know where you get it from,” Patrick said. She looked up at him, incredulously. “Sorry–just trying to make you smile.”

“No, you’re right. My uncle Mac’s been saying it for years–I’m just as stubborn as my parents.” She sighed and rubbed her eyes. “Is there any changes in the patients? Do you know Cameron’s status?”

“Everyone’s admitted, we have one or two new cases and Cameron’s fever has leveled at 104.3 the last time I looked in on him. The elderly and the children are being monitored very closely, but no one’s made any improvements.”

“I should go check on them, get a first hand look–maybe there’s something I’m missing.”

Patrick tightened his hand on her shoulder to keep her from rising. “You’re not going anywhere near them.”

“Your son is gay?” Noah repeated. “And why was he in a police station?”

“Because he was beaten up,” Bobbie sighed. “He’s going to counseling to deal with it all and I’m just praying it’s a phase.” She shook her head. “I don’t want to talk about that. I want to talk about this transplant of yours. Tony says you’ve refused treatment.”

“I’m not going to get a liver that ought to go someone else more deserving–I won’t do that, Bobbie and I’m sure as hell not going to let my son put his life in jeopardy to do so either.”

“Noah, don’t be ridiculous,” Bobbie chastised. “You know the success ratio of a surgery like this–there’s almost no risk to the donor, it’s usually to the person getting the organ, with rejection and all that but Patrick will be safe.”

“Things go wrong all the time in the OR,” Noah shook his head. “Surgeons make mistakes, they lose patients.” He looked towards the wall. “How could I live with myself if my selfishness cost me my son?”

“And how will Patrick be able to live with himself when you die and he could have saved you?” Bobbie demanded. “Oh, you men are all alike–you think you know everything and that you know what’s best. Well, you’re being plain out ridiculous, Noah Drake and I can’t believe you’re going to let your son have your death on his hands.”

Robin bristled. “Excuse me?”

“You’re tired, you haven’t eaten all day and your immune system already isn’t as strong as everyone else’s. There’s no way you’re going anywhere near those patients until you get some sleep and eat.”

“Who do you think you are? You’re not my doctor,” Robin retorted.

“But they are my patients and if you fall sick with this flu, then where will be?” Patrick demanded. “You’re too susceptible to this virus, Robin and I’m not taking the chance that’ll you get sick.”

“Why do you care?” Robin snapped. “If I get sick, they’ll just get another researcher, I’m not irreplaceable–”

“You can’t possibly be this blind,” Patrick all but snarled. He spun her seat around and gripped her shoulders. “Why do you think I don’t want any thing to happen to you?”

A sarcastic comment was on the tip of her tongue but Robin bit it back when she met his eyes and saw something that would go unsaid because it, quite frankly, terrified them both. “Oh.” She bit her lip. “Okay, well–I–I should probably take a break, get something to eat–a nap.”

Patrick released her. “You do that, I’ll go do another round on the patients and check in on Cameron.”

This entry is part 5 of 8 in the North Star

I think about the years I spent just passing through
I’d like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
— Bless the Broken Road, Rascal Flatts

Mac was sitting in his office, studying statements from the Ruiz case when there was a hesitant knock on his door. Robin stood in the open doorway. “Uncle Mac?”

Mac leapt to his feet, alarmed at his niece’s pallor. “Robin, what’s going on? What’s wrong?”

She entered the office and closed the door behind her. “Uncle Mac, something happened at the hospital this morning…” Her knees felt like jelly again and she lowered herself into a chair. “I saw…” she swallowed hard. “I saw…I saw Dad.”

Mac sat down with a thud. “Robin–that’s just not–it’s not possible.”

“That’s–I thought that too but I saw him, and we spoke–” Robin’s voice thickened and she gripped the strap of her purse. “He asked to see the chief of staff and he was talking to me like we didn’t even–like he wasn’t my father.” Her lips trembled. “He said it was good to see me but he wished I hadn’t been at the nurse’s station. And I told him where Alan was and he just…”

“Robin, you understand that you’re telling me that Robert–my brother–is still alive.” Mac gripped his pencil. “Are you sure?”

“I wouldn’t–” she shook her head. “I wouldn’t lie about this. And if I had dreamed my father came back…it certainly wouldn’t be like this–” Her voice cracked. “He was so cold, Uncle Mac. I don’t understand–it’s not like with Mom where she had amnesia and really didn’t remember me. He knew who I was and–he didn’t care.” Robin clutched at the arm rests of her chair. “I don’t know what’s supposed to happen next or–”

Her beeper went off and Robin closed her eyes. “I have–that’s the hospital–he was at the hospital to meet with Alan. Can you–” She rose to her feet. “I don’t know, Uncle Mac. I need you to…I just need you.”

Mac stood and rounded the desk to pull Robin into a hard hug. “I’ll go right now and see if I can find him. I’ll get to the bottom of this, Robin, I promise you.”

Lucky Spencer rushed to the door. “Mac–I gotta go to the hospital. My dad and my sister were just rushed in and Elizabeth just called–Cam’s sick–”

“That must be why I’m getting beeped.” Robin cleared her throat and wiped at her eyes. “I’ll be at the hospital when you get done that…thing…”

Patrick had been in the middle of discussing treatment options with Tony when he himself had been beeped to go the ER. When he arrived, the place was in bedlam–there were patients every where. Kids screaming, babies crying, people crowded into a very small waiting room.

“Jesus Christ,” he swore. “What happened?”

Robin burst through the ER doors, shrugging into her white coat. “It’s some kind of flu,” she said, breathless as she approached him. “Some really weird strain.” She scanned the crowd and was dismayed at the familiar faces–Alexis was coughing while her husband looked on–Lulu was doubled over, Dillon was patting her back as Robin’s cousin Georgie stood by them. And weirder–Tracy was barking orders at the passing doctors to demand they look at her husband.

When Robin spotted a terrified Elizabeth cradling a hysterical Cameron, she abandoned all other thoughts and rushed over. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“I d-don’t…know,” Elizabeth said brokenly. “He w-was s-sleeping and I w-went in to c-check on him and he was b-burning up–” her stricken eyes met Robin’s. “You have to help him.”

“Okay,” Robin murmured. She put an arm around her friend’s shoulders and led her towards the elevators. “We’re going to draw some blood, put him on a respirator–”

“What?” Elizabeth asked, panicked. “Why?”

“Because he needs help breathing right now. He’s too young to have struggle like this.” Robin pushed the button. “We have to take him to pediatrics–there are good doctors up there, Elizabeth, who will know exactly what to do.”

“You w-won’t be there?” Elizabeth asked, shaken. “Where are you going?”

“I’ll be needed in the lab–to examine the blood, to find out what strain this is so that we can treat everyone. ” She gripped Elizabeth’s shoulders. “It’s going to be okay.”

The elevator doors slid open and Robin nudged Elizabeth in. She pressed the floor for pediatrics and stepped back. “I’ll be up to check on you in a little while, okay?”

When the doors slid shut, Robin took a deep breath and threw herself into the work and putting all other events out of her mind.

Mac found his quarry standing with a shaken Alan Quartermaine outside the chief of staff office.

“This is all so confusing, I don’t understand–” Alan was saying as Mac stepped up to them. “You’re supposed to be dead and you’re quarantining the hospital?”

“I wish there were time to explain everything but we have to act fast,” Robert said. He heard the footsteps behind and turned to face his brother. “Mac.”

“She was telling the truth,” Mac murmured. “I had to see–” His voice shook and he looked away. It took him a long moment before he focused. “I want to know what’s going on right now.”

“There’s a strain of flu that I’ve been chasing and it was brought to Port Charles–there are people already showing the symptoms. I was explaining–”

“I don’t care about any of that right now,” Mac slashed a hand through the air. “I’m talking about you being dead and gone for fourteen years and showing up to treat your daughter like a stranger.”

“I can’t–” Robert shifted uncomfortable. “I won’t talk about that right now. When the hospital is quarantined and we’ve got a handle on the situation, we can–I’ll talk to her–” he broke off. “She looked good. I–I’m grateful to you–but–” he shook his head. “It’s not the time right now–there are people’s lives at stake.”

“Fine,” Mac all but snarled. “Do you need anything to quarantine the hospital?” he asked Alan. “Any men?”

“No, but we’ll be transporting as many patients as possible to Mercy so that we can concentrate on the flu victims. Some police escorts would be helpful.”

“I’ll call some men.” Mac sent another scathing glare at his brother before storming away.

“Coming back from the dead,” Alan sighed, “It’s never easy.”

“Here are more test results,” Patrick said, setting a stack of folders next to Robin’s work space. “Fifteen total patients so far.”

Robin exhaled slowly. “It’s incredible–I don’t ever remember something like spreading so fast and becoming so dangerous. This a strain like I’ve never seen before.” She made some notes. “Is there, ah, any word on the quarantine? Has it gone into effect?”

“The last non critical patient was transferred to Mercy ten minutes ago. Everyone has been admitted and is receiving what treatment isavailable. Your father–” Patrick coughed. “He’s from the World Health Organization and apparently, it’s a tropical flu that he’s been chasing for years with no real cure.”

Robin rubbed her eyes. “I haven’t seen him since this morning but my uncle Mac said he wasn’t very forthcoming with the explanations.” She reached for some of the results that he’d brought. “I didn’t even–did they move Noah?”

“They tried but he refused to go. He said as soon as his incision was healed, he wanted to be able to help here.” Patrick sat on the stool adjacent to the desk. “He won’t have a transplant.”

Robin’s pen fumbled and she looked at him. “What?”

“He doesn’t want a transplant.” Patrick reached for a nearby pencil and twirled between his fingers. “He says that he’s wrecked his life, he’s not going to put mine in jeopardy.”

“But there’s a high ratio of success–especially between family donors.” She shook her head. “He’s a surgeon, he must know the statistics.”

“Yeah, well…” Patrick snapped the pencil in two and cleared his throat. “You remember what I said earlier about things not possibly getting worse?”

“Yeah, even the great Dr. Drake makes mistakes,” but Robin softened the statement by giving him a weak smile. “You should get back out on the floor.”

He stood. “I’ll stop by later to see how–how the research is going.”

Robin watched him go and sighed heavily. And she’d thought the day had started badly.

A long time later, as she struggled with exhaustion, the door opened again and Robin glanced up, expecting to see Patrick or even Elizabeth. Instead, her father stood here.

“The situation is under control for the moment,” Robert remarked. “I thought we might talk.”

Robin set her pen aside. “What’s there to talk about? Did you have amnesia like Mom and couldn’t remember your life?”

“No.”

“So you’ve been alive all this time, you knew who you were and that we thought you were dead and you still didn’t contact us.”

“Well, yes,” Robert stated.

Robin picked her pen back up and continued making notes. “Then I don’t see what we have to discuss.”

This entry is part 4 of 8 in the North Star

This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
— Bless the Broken Road, Rascal Flatts

“The biopsy went as expected,” Tony told Patrick as Noah was wheeled back into his room. “We’re sending the tests down to the lab and we should have the results back in a few hours.”

“How long will he be asleep?” Patrick asked. “I didn’t realize you sedated the patients during a routine biopsy.”

“We didn’t at first, we used a local but he was complaining about pain so we used general. It should only last about an hour.” Tony checked the chart. “Normally, this is an out patient procedure but since he’s already checked in, there’s no point in sending him home.”

“From performing the biopsy…” Patrick hesitated. “Is there anything you can tell me?”

“We used a different type of procedure, we never even opened him up so we really can’t make any determination before the results come in.” Tony cleared his throat. “Robin mentioned that you were interested in being tested for a living donor transplant.”

“I didn’t realize Robin was still working on my father’s case–I thought she turned it over to you.”

“Well, she’s primarily a researcher, Patrick. If we weren’t so short handed, she wouldn’t be working the ER at all. But no, she’s not on the case anymore. It had to be handed over to a surgeon.” Tony put a hand on Patrick’s shoulder. “Just relax, there’s no point in getting involved in possible treatment options until we diagnosis. It’s a complicated and invasive procedure.”

Patrick exhaled slowly. “Yeah, that’s what Robin said too.”

Robin pushed some charts aside until she found the one she was looking for. While making notations, she heard a set of footsteps stop in front of the nurse’s station and not move on again.

“Can I–” Her words trailed off as she looked up and swallowed hard.

She used to have a picture that she took everywhere, always tucked it in her wallet, in her purse–in her shoe if there were nowhere else to keep it. Her father and her mother, before the boating explosion.
When she found her mother a few years ago, she’d exchanged the picture for one of her father solo. She said a prayer every night for him and had always felt a little better knowing that he was looking down on her.

Apparently, he was a little closer than the heavens.

Robert Scorpio was fourteen years older, but the shape of his eyes, the line of his nose–his hands–they would always be the same.

Robin set her pen down. “Daddy?” she whispered.

Robert cleared his throat. “I need to speak with the chief of staff–but I’m not sure who that it is.” He shifted. “It’s good to see you, Robin.”

“It’s good to see you,” Robin repeated numbly. Words you’d say if you hadn’t spoken in a few years but… “I don’t–I don’t understand.”

“I need to speak to the chief of staff, Robin,” Robert said again. “Can you tell me who it is?”

“That’s all you can say?” Robin said, regaining some slight composure. “It’s good to see you–where’s the chief of staff? You haven’t been out of town for a few weeks, Dad, you’ve been–” She clasped a hand over her mouth and stepped back. “You’ve been dead,” she whispered harshly. “Don’t you have anything to say to me?”

Robert shook his head. “I can’t–we can’t get into this right now, Robin. I wish there had been anyone else at this desk at this moment. I need to–”

“His office is where it’s always been,” Robin interrupted coldly. “And Alan Quartermaine is the chief now.”

“I–I’ll get in touch with you later,” Robert said after a long moment. He reached out and touched her cheek before abruptly letting his hand fall to his side. He stepped away and disappeared down a hallway. Robin stared after him and brought her hand to her cheek.

“Robin?”

A voice penetrated through the thick fog surrounding her throats. She cleared her throat and focused on Patrick. “What–what do you want?”

She was so pale, he thought. Her lips and her cheeks were drained of color and she was holding her cheek like she’d been slapped. “What’s wrong?” he asked. “Did–was someone giving you a hard time?”

“No–I ah–” Robin shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts. “My–he was–it’s not important.” She dragged a hand through her hair. “What did you need, Patrick?”

“My–my dad’s results are in and I wanted to–” Patrick touched her shoulder. “Seriously, Robin–what’s wrong? I’ve never seen you look so…” Unfocused, shaken, he wanted to say. Her eyes were flat, empty. “I know we don’t get along on the best of days, but–”

“I can suddenly understand how your father can do something that makes you want to hit him,” Robin murmured. “How he can throw something away and not understand why it’s so wrong…” She gripped the counter. Suddenly her knees felt weak. “I need to sit down.”

“Okay, okay–” Patrick took her arm and put an arm around her waist to keep her standing as he led her over to the couch. She didn’t put up a fight and that alone gave him some insight–something had rocked her world. “Here we are.” He lowered her to the couch and sat on the table in front of her. “Do you need some water?”

“No…I’ll be okay in a minute.” Robin fisted her hands in the fabric of her dark cotton pants. “I just–I need a second.”

“Did you have a fight with your uncle?” Patrick asked. “Was he just here?”

“My uncle?” Robin repeated, confused. “What do you mean?”

“Well you said he raised you when your parents died and when you said your father–” Abruptly Patrick closed his mouth as something absurd occurred to him. “Your father is dead, isn’t he?”

“Not anymore,” Robin whispered. “I was just–I was standing there and he came up to me–he spoke to me like he didn’t even know me,” she said, horrified. “And then he said–he said, it’s good to see you, Robin.” Her bewildered eyes found his. “Like we were old friends that hadn’t seen each for a while. And when I asked—he just wanted to see Alan and he said he wished it had been anyone else at the desk–” She covered her mouth and bowed her head. “I don’t understand–he’s supposed to be–I don’t understand what’s happening.”

Wondering if maybe she’d been hallucinating because it was his experience that people didn’t usually come back from the dead, Patrick switched positions to sit next to her on the couch. He was sure he was the last person she wanted to see right now but whether she liked it or not, he was the only person available. He put his arm around her shoulders and hesitantly drew to his side.

She surprised him by collapsing and curling into his embrace and when he felt the warmth of her tears on his shirt, he understood something for the first time. He understood what his father might have seen in his mother that would make him even remotely consider being a one woman man.

“It’s okay,” Patrick murmured, instinctively brushing his lips over her dark hair. “Well–okay, it’s not but it will be.”

“You can’t know that,” Robin whispered. She raised her head and met his eyes. “You can’t promise that.”

“Sure I can,” he said, giving a half smile. “If there’s anything I do know, it’s that nothing can possibly get any worse than your father coming back from the dead and my father being given a death sentence, right?”

Robin inhaled sharply and drew away. He let her go reluctantly and watched her wipe frantically at her eyes. “Noah’s results came in?”

“Yeah–it’s end-stage cirrhosis, like Tony thought it would be. It’s not–there’s nothing I can do about it right now, Robin. Let me–” he reached for her but she shook her head.

“I have–I have to go find my uncle Mac. And–” She closed her and bit down hard on her bottom lip. “I’m so sorry about your father, Patrick. I really am.” Robin stood and looked around, somewhat confused as if suddenly realizing that she wasn’t at the nurse’s station anymore. “Thank you…for…” she suddenly felt embarrassed. “I wish I hadn’t fallen apart like that but thank you for…being kind.”

“I care about you, Robin,” Patrick stood and she stepped back a little. “I’m not sure who that surprises more–me or you. But I do and I want to be here for you–the same way you’ve been there for me since we admitted my dad last night.”

“I can’t–” She couldn’t breathe. Wasn’t there a limit on how much a person could take in one day? “I don’t–”

“It’s okay,” Patrick nodded. “Go see your uncle. He’ll know the right words to say and what to do next.”

“Okay.” Robin took a deep breath and attempted to get a grip on her swirling thoughts. “I’ll be back though–for–for you and Noah, okay?” She rushed away before he could answer and he watched her go, wishing he’d never met her.

He’d never wanted to meet someone his mother would have approved of.