April 21, 2014

This entry is part 23 of 29 in the Surviving the Past

Jeff entered Kelly’s, looking for someone he knew who’d know where Elizabeth was living. He needed to find her—needed to make her understand that she couldn’t tell anyone.

Jeff wasn’t proud of the way he’d raised Elizabeth. He knew he’d taken discipline too far sometimes—but every time he saw the girl, he was reminded of Katherine and Mike Corbin. His blood began to boil whenever he thought about the man and the affair he’d had with his wife.

Jeff searched the small diner—but couldn’t find anyone. He left and took a walk down by the docks.

He’d met Katherine Barrington just after she’d left finishing school and they’d been married a year later. He didn’t love her and she didn’t love him, but the match was socially acceptable and the two got along. Sarah and Steven were born within five years.

It was then the marriage began to sour. Katherine began to grow distant, would spend hours staring into space. It had been months before Jeff even noticed, but by the time he had, Katherine was already pregnant with Mike’s child.

Jeff’s eyes flashed as he remembered the day Katherine told him she was leaving him for Mike. She’d actually thought she could get away with it. She had gone—but it had only taken a sum of money and a few idle threats before Mike Corbin disappeared.

He’d expected Katherine to return right away, but it’d been a few months before she did. Jeff still wasn’t sure why he’d wanted the tramp back—maybe it was just to prove to her that no one left Jeff Webber and got away with it.

He’d worn her down and finally, Katherine had moved back home. The child had been born, a lovely little girl that looked like Katherine—with Mike Corbin’s eyes. Jeff had always been irritated when seeing Elizabeth, but it wasn’t until the little girl had been seven years old and had smarted off to him.

Her eyes had flashed and he was reminded of the way her mother had looked the day she’d left him. He’d smacked her straight across the face—and for the first time, his anger had been satisfied. And after a while, disciplining Elizabeth was the only thing that kept Jeff in line.

He’d never loved Elizabeth—and he was sorry if she’d ever had the illusion. Truth be told, Jeff wasn’t sure he loved anyone—including his daughter and son, neither of whom spoke to him anymore. He sure as hell didn’t love Katherine. Katherine didn’t love anyone except herself anyway.

Oh sure, for the first years since Jeff’s discipline of Elizabeth had begun, Katherine might speak up in her defense, but Jeff had taken care of that quickly. He’d threatened to cut Katherine off from the money and throw her out, without any contact with her three children. Katherine had never tried to stop him again.

The only time Jeff was ever worried about the way he’d treated Elizabeth was the morning that he’d caught her sneaking back in her room. When Jason Quartermaine had come to her rescue. For the first time, Jeff worried about Elizabeth and who else she’d told. It quickly became apparent that the Quartermaine boy was her only confidant. And after his accident, Jeff felt like he could breathe again. The boy didn’t remember Elizabeth, much less anything about her father.

Jeff’s anger had gotten worse after that—he’d been furious that Elizabeth had told anyone, much less a Quartermaine. Katherine was withdrawing again—and Jeff discovered that Mike Corbin had returned to town to claim his son, Sonny Corinthos. Shortly before Elizabeth’s eighteenth birthday, Jeff discovered that Katherine and Mike had been meeting again. Worried that Mike might try and claim Elizabeth, Jeff decided to take the initiative.

He’d told Elizabeth the truth and had her thrown out. He’d taken Katherine to Europe and they hadn’t returned until now. Jeff hadn’t expected to run into Elizabeth within his first week—but from the look in her eyes, he could tell she was still terrified.

A terror he could use to ensure that Elizabeth never told anyone again. But first, he had to find her. He knew she lived with Emily Quartermaine—but any information other than that was difficult to come by. Elizabeth had taken her place as Sonny’s sister, and Emily was a close family friend. No one discussed the Corinthos family or their friends for any amount of money, Jeff was quickly beginning to understand.

Because the history between himself and Elizabeth was no one’s business but his and hers. There was no need for anyone to come in and try to convince Elizabeth that it wasn’t her fault. Because Jeff knew it was. She was an illegitimate child he’d been forced to raise to save face. He’d given her his name, the best schools, the best upbringing and she’d still mouthed off to him. She’d provoked him to do everything—it was entirely Elizabeth’s fault.

—-

Emily checked her watch and sighed. Lucky was late. She’d been so excited to see the WSB agent and now he was over twenty minutes late. She sat back on the park bench and crossed her legs. Lucky was only back in town for a little while and she hadn’t seen him for a year. She was anxious to fill him in on all the news. Jason being back, her relationship with Nikolas, the new snobby Deception model that Emily abhorred, the newest Quartermaine family news with Ned’s new baby and the newest illegitimate child, not to mention her relationship with Nikolas.

Emily frowned as she heard laughter drifting her way. She recognized Lucky’s…and the girl with him. She stood and glared as Lucky Spencer emerged from a path—Gia Campbell on his arm. He’d been in town two days and he’d already met Gia?

“Em!” Lucky said, releasing Gia’s arm and wrapping her in a tight hug. “It’s been too long!”

Emily hugged him back, gritting her teeth. “You too! What’s going on?” She pulled away and threw a look at Gia. “How do you know Gia?”

Lucky turned and extended his hand towards the model. “I met Gia in France a few months ago. We’ve been writing each other.”

Emily studied Gia’s face as she stood next to Lucky. The snobby girl…she looked happy. Emily frowned. Did Gia like Lucky that way? “So are you two together?”

Emily gaped as Gia flushed. “Yeah,” she admitted.

Emily grinned at Lucky. “That’s amazing!” She hugged her friend again. “I’m glad you found someone.”

“Actually—” Lucky hesitated. “We need your help.”

Emily gestured towards the bench. They sat down and she turned to him. “What’s up?”

Lucky and Gia exchanged looks. “We’re actually flying to London tonight.”

Emily’s face fell. “But you just got home!”

“I know, Em, and I’m sorry,” Lucky said quickly. “But I’ll only be gone for a few weeks. Gia…and I….well, we’re getting married.”

Emily’s head began to spin. “Wait, I just find out today that not only do you know each other, that you’re getting married…are you two sure?”

Gia nodded firmly. “More than sure,” she said. “I love him.”

Lucky looked at her fondly. “I love her.”

Emily wondered idly if the way they were looking at each other was the way she and Nikolas looked at one other. If so, she and Nikolas needed to discuss the pukage factor. Shaking her head to clear her thoughts she said, “All right. What do you need me to do?”

“Run interference with Carly,” Gia said. “I know we don’t get along, Emily, but Carly hates me more than you do. I don’t want to wreck this amazing day by getting into a fight with her.”

“You want me to tell Carly?” Emily said, skeptically. “Do I look like I have a death wish? Why not tell Laura? I mean, she’ll be happy for you.”

Lucky scratched his head. “We just came from there. Dad supports the marriage, but Mom’s a bit upset with Gia.”

Gia bit her lip. “I told her I was giving up my career.”

Emily gaped at her. “Why?”

“I can’t be with Lucky and be a model,” Gia explains. “You know what he does–and I want to be able to be with him. So I’m going to train.”

“You’re going into the WSB?” Emily asked in a hushed voice. “You?”

Gia looked irritated. “What’s that supposed to mean? Just because I’m pretty I can’t be an agent? Felicia Jones is an agent—why am I any different?”

Emily took a deep breath. “Look, the two of you have thrown me for a loop today. You need to give me a few seconds to absorb this.” She fiddled with her purse strap for a few moments. “All right. I’ll run interference with Carly—but you have to promise me that this is what you really want.”

Gia nodded firmly. “I do.”

Lucky grinned. “Thanks. You’re the best.”

“Yeah,” Emily grumbled as they stood. “I am, aren’t I?” She sighed. “If it’s not one thing…it’s another.”

Lucky frowned. Turning to Gia, he said, “Hey…why don’t you give me and Em some time…? I’ll meet you at the club in an hour.”

Gia nodded and kissed him. She disappeared down the path. Emily watched her go.

“You know, I can’t stand her,” Emily murmured. “I never thought you’d end up with her.”

“She was in France a few months ago…doing a shoot. Me and Dad were on assignment—” Lucky stopped and shook his head. “That’s not what’s important. What’s wrong?”

Emily rubbed her eyes. “Everything—but it’s nothing I can tell you.”

“Are you okay?” Lucky asked. “I mean…can you tell me that?”

“Yeah. I’m confused…and…” she paused. “One of my friends…is going through a bad time and I’m trying to be there for her, but I don’t know what to do to help. I mean, I could listen—but she’s got that. And I hate not being able to help,” Emily said.

Lucky took her hand in his and squeezed. “I’m sure your friend knows how much you love her. We can’t always help the people we love.”

“I know. But it doesn’t help me,” Emily muttered. “I also…I’m angry with her—she didn’t tell me—for years…she didn’t let me in. Then she told me and she shut me right out again. And I know it’s a stupid and selfish reason to be angry but I can’t help that.”

Lucky shrugged. “You’re human, Em. You have your own life to lead and no matter how much you want to help, you can’t all the time.”

Emily wrinkled her nose, irritated. “I hate when you make sense.”

Lucky grinned. “I know.”

She hugged him tightly. “Be happy, Lucky.”

He smiled into her hair. “I will.”

—–

Carly’s day wasn’t going half bad. She’d gone to work, managed to avoid Laura Spencer, and had even stopped thinking about Elizabeth for a little while.

She was in the lobby of the Harborview Towers when a man stepped in her path. Slightly irritated but determined not to let it ruin her day, she gave him a bright smile and tried to pass him.

“Do you know which apartment Elizabeth Webber lives in?” the man asked.

Immediately, Carly frowned. “Why? Who are you?”

Jeff Webber stuck out his hand out. “I’m her father. Jeff Webber.”

Carly’s eyes narrowed and glittered angrily. “Is that so? Well, I’m Carly. Carly Corinthos. Sonny’s wife. And Elizabeth’s sister-in-law.”

Jeff froze—and wondered if he was too late for stop Elizabeth from telling anyone. He relaxed—trying not to panic. “Nice to meet you.” His hand wavered in the air a little longer before it became apparent that Carly wasn’t going to take it. “Ah, yes, well, do you know which apartment she’s in?”

“If you’re her father,” Carly said, the disgust dripping from her voice, “then you ought to know.” She took a step closer to him, her face only a breath away. “Stay away from her, if you know what’s good for you. Don’t talk to her, don’t talk about her, don’t even think about her. You’d be better off pretending you’d never met her. Do we understand one another?”

“I raised her,” Jeff argued. “I have a right to her.”

“Your rights ended the day you tossed her out of your house and onto my husband’s doorstep, got it?” Carly stepped back and crossed her arms. “Is there anything else?”

“You can’t keep me from her,” Jeff protested—albeit weakly. He knew that Elizabeth had said something—what he wasn’t sure.

“No…maybe I can’t,” Carly said. She tilted her head to the side. “But Jason can.”

“Jason?” Jeff frowned. Jason Quartermaine?

“You remember Jason,” Carly spit out. “He and Elizabeth were close when they were younger—and they’re just as close now.” She waited a beat. “No secrets between them.”

Jeff took a step back, understanding the meaning of Carly’s words. He stared at her for another moment before turning and leaving.

Carly stared after him and ran a shaky hand through her hair. She turned back towards the elevators.

—-

Elizabeth tucked her feet underneath and sipped her hot chocolate. Jason was next to her going over warehouse invoices. Things had been awkward between them most of the day and she didn’t really understand why. She got the distinct feeling that something was on his mind.

She was considering going home to the apartment tonight. While staying here helped her to sleep, she couldn’t depend on him the rest of her life. She had to stand strong, on her own two feet. She hadn’t even left the penthouse since seeing Jeff a few days ago. She’d been hiding—and she’d told herself that it wasn’t going to happen anymore.

Finally Jason set the papers on the table and turned to her. “We need to talk.”

“Yes,” Elizabeth agreed. “We do.” She sipped her drink, waiting for him to continue.

“I like when you’re here,” Jason started. “And I was wondering—”

Elizabeth bit her lip and looked away. She knew what he was going to ask and she didn’t want him to finish the question. Because she knew she had to say no. It’d be all too easy to move in with him and let him protect her from everything—including seeing Jeff. And as tempting as it was, she knew that it wouldn’t help in the end. Because all she would be doing is delaying the inevitable.

“Jason, wait,” she cut in before he could finish. “I know what you’re going to ask.”

“You do?” Jason asked, hesitantly.

“You’re asking me to move in,” Elizabeth stated. Jason nodded, confirming it. She sighed. “You know I want to, right? That there’s nothing I’d like more.”

“But?” Jason prompted.

“But,” Elizabeth continued, “I’d feel like I was taking the easy way out and that’s not what I want to do. I could move in—and I could continue to hole up here where Jeff Webber can’t touch me—but that’s not going to solve my problems.” She took a deep breath. “The only way to solve my problem is show him that he’s not going to rule my life, that he hasn’t won. And that means going home, going back to work, taking my life back.”

“I understand.”

“Do you?” she asked. “Do you really? Because the last I want to do is hurt you, Jason. You’re too important to me.”

“I do understand,” Jason answered. “And I even agree. I want to help, that’s all. You know that.”

“Yeah, I know,” Elizabeth said quietly. She met his eyes. “But doesn’t mean I still don’t want to see you. Just that…we can’t move as fast as we’d like. I have a lot of things to work through…”

“I know.” Jason took her hand in his. “And I’ll do whatever you need.”

“No matter what it is?” Elizabeth asked, hesitantly.

“Anything,” Jason said, firmly.

This entry is part 22 of 29 in the Surviving the Past

Elizabeth crept down the stairs and paused as she took in the scene below her. It was a few hours after her conversation with Jason—she’d convinced him she was okay and needed to be alone for a while. So, he’d gone downstairs.

Carly and Emily were sitting on the couch arguing whether to watch Sex and the City or Law and Order: Criminal Intent. Carly was explaining how Big was moving and she couldn’t miss this episode and Emily countered with watching her show would benefit everyone in the long run. Why, Alexis wouldn’t be in practice forever—someone would have to take over and didn’t Carly want the best defending her husband?

Sonny was sitting at the desk, going over receipts and mumbling something about Benny and vacations. Jason was shooting a game of pool by himself. She watched him for a few minutes wondering why he’d put up with her baggage instead finding a woman who could be normal.

As if feeling her stare, Jason glanced up and smiled. She gave him a weak smile in return and continued down the stairs, catching the attention of the other three in the room.

Emily grinned. “Beth! Tell Carly why we absolutely have to watch Law and Order!”

“No way,” Carly argued. “You’ve seen this episode. I can’t miss this Sex and the City! Miranda’s baby is going to be born—Big’s leaving! It’s season finale!”

“You’ve seen this episode too,” Emily retorted. “I remember—we watched it together.”

Elizabeth grinned. “Why don’t the two of you compromise? We can watch That 70s Show.” She sat on the couch and took the remote from Carly and switched the show on. “We always watch this anyway.” She leaned back on the couch and relaxed.

Carly and Emily traded triumphant looks over Elizabeth’s head. Keeping Elizabeth’s mind off Jeff would be a difficult job—but they could handle it.

Once Sonny was positive the girls were engrossed in the sitcom, he pushed his chair back and approached the pool table. He caught Jason’s attention and motioned to the hallway. Jason shot a quick glance at the girls and followed him.

“What’s up?” Jason asked once the door was shut.

“I’ve been thinking,” Sonny said. “I know we should let Liz deal with Webber herself, but I think we need to make sure he stays away until she’s ready to do so.”

Jason nodded. “I don’t want her running into him around town until she’s ready.”

“So, I’ve already put Max on him. I didn’t give him specifics, but I just want to know where he is at all times.”

Jason looked back at the penthouse door. “How long you all planning on staying?” he asked.

“I’m going home tonight,” Sonny answered. “I wanted to spend last night and today here to make sure Liz knows I’m here for her. I’ll probably be able to convince Carly to come with me—but I think Emily’s a little hurt right now.”

“Why?” Jason asked.

Sonny shrugged. “Liz kept this from her and even after she told her, she still shut Emily out—and I think Em’s a little upset by that fact. You might want to ask Liz to talk to her.”

Jason nodded. “I can ask her—but I can’t promise you anything.”

“I know. Thanks for being here for her,” Sonny replied. “I’m glad that she has someone she can talk to. I also wanted you to know—don’t worry about work the next few days. Just concentrate on her, okay?”

“Good. I was going to ask for a few days,” Jason replied. “It’s been a rough weekend.”

Sonny sighed. “Yeah. Well, we’d better head back in there before they notice we’re gone.”

—-

It had taken Sonny nearly an hour to convince Carly to go home but eventually she’d given in. But she hadn’t gone before extracting a promise from Emily that she’d call if there was any trouble. They ate dinner at Jason’s and went home afterwards. As expected, Emily took up temporary residence in the guestroom and she went to sleep early.

Elizabeth was sitting in the bed in the master bedroom when Jason finally came upstairs. She was still in his shirt—despite the fact that Emily had brought her night clothes. She’d pulled the sheet up around her waist and had her knees hugged to her chest.

“You okay?” Jason asked, heading for the dresser to take out a pair of sweat pants.

“I’m all right,” Elizabeth replied. “A little scared to sleep.”

He looked at her. “Really?”

“Yeah.” She looked away. “Carly mentioned I woke up a lot—around a dozen times. That’s more than any night I can remember.” She looked back at him. “I’m sorry. I know that you don’t get a lot of sleep when I’m here.”

Jason sat next to her on the bed and took one of her hands. “And I told you—it’s my choice. If I didn’t want you here, I’d tell you.”

Elizabeth smiled. “I know.” She took a deep breath. “Do you think I’ll ever be normal?”

Jason chuckled. “Elizabeth, you’re Sonny’s sister and you work for Carly. No, I don’t think you’ll ever be normal.”

She laughed. It was a small laugh—but Jason felt relieved nonetheless. She hadn’t laughed since all day—not even while watching television earlier that evening.

“No,” Elizabeth said. “I mean, do you think I’ll ever be the way I was yesterday?”

Jason hesitated. “Honestly?” She nodded. “No.”

Her shoulders slumped and she looked away. “Oh.”

“I think you’ll be better,” Jason finished. “Because, like you said earlier, this won’t be over until you can face him and what he did. Once you can do that…the nightmares might fade—and maybe for good this time. You won’t be looking over your shoulder—wondering. And you won’t be keeping the people you love in the dark. I think…once you’ve faced this once and for all…you’ll be better than you were yesterday.”

She squeezed his hand, meeting his eyes. “You always know what to say.” She paused. “Why are you doing this?”

“What do you mean?” Jason asked.

“I mean…most guys…most twenty-two-year-old guys would run screaming the other way from someone with as much emotional baggage as me.” Elizabeth narrowed her eyes and tilted her head to the side. “You don’t. And neither did Jason Quartermaine. What made the two of you so different?”

Jason didn’t say anything first but he finally met her eyes and gave her a smile. “Maybe it’s because he loved you. I know that’s why I’m still here.”

Elizabeth smiled a little. “I think you’re right. I think after this is over…I’ll be better than I was yesterday.”

Jason nodded and stood. “Good. I’m gonna get a shower.”

—-

When Jason came out of the bathroom, Elizabeth was curled up on her side and had her eyes closed. Thinking she was asleep, Jason slipped into bed behind her and wrapped an arm around her waist.

After a few minutes she said, “Emily’s angry with me, isn’t she?”

“I thought you were asleep,” Jason said.

“I was trying to—but I’m right aren’t I? Emily’s mad because I shut her out,” Elizabeth whispered.

“What makes you think that?”

“The way she’s been acting. I know when Emily’s mad at me. She tries too hard to hide it—so it’s obvious to see.”

“Sonny said she’s hurt that you didn’t come to her,” Jason said finally.

Elizabeth bit her lip and closed her eyes. “I really screwed this situation up didn’t I?” she asked quietly. “I only told Jason Quartermaine—which was my first mistake. If I hadn’t kept it a secret, those last three years wouldn’t have been so bad. I could have turned to Emily, at least. And then, after the accident, I still kept it to myself—even when it was so bad that I wanted to die. I met Carly and Sonny—found out what happened to him and still kept it away. I didn’t tell Emily until I had no choice and then I refused to let you in or her help. I’ve shut her out and AJ, too. Carly and Sonny as well. The only person I even go to is you.”

Jason tightened his arm around her waist. “None of this is your fault,” he told her. “You did the best you could. I think Emily knows that—and that’s why she won’t bring it up. But it doesn’t change how she feels.”

Elizabeth sighed. “I guess I should talk to her.”

“Don’t do anything you’re not ready for,” Jason said. “Emily loves you—she’ll be there when you’re ready.”

“If I wait until I’m ready,” Elizabeth said, “I’ll probably never tell her. I’m going to talk to her tomorrow.”

“Okay.”

A few more minutes passed but Jason knew she hadn’t gone to sleep. “Jason?”

“Yeah?”

“When AJ gets back at the end of the week, are you still going to see Edward and Lila?”

“I don’t know,” Jason said. “It’s up to him and Emily. Why?”

“I don’t know.” She paused. “Jason?”

He closed his eyes and smiled, amused. “Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.” He paused. “Go to sleep.”

“Okay.” There was another pause. “Jason?”

He laughed this time—he could hear the humor in her voice. “What?”

She rolled over so he was over her. She smiled at him, her eyes sleepy. She reached up with a hand and pulled his head down to kiss him.

He raised his head a few minutes later, the amusement still his eyes. “What was that for?”

Elizabeth smiled. “I couldn’t go to sleep without a goodnight kiss,” she said.

—-

Elizabeth woke the next morning to the smell of pancakes and sausage. She smiled, her eyes still closed. That was Emily’s trademark breakfast. You knew what kind of mood she was in by the type of pancake she made. Blueberries—she’d had a fight with Nikolas. Raspberries—she’d had a fight and they’d made up. Bananas- she was expecting an apology from someone. Chocolate chip – she was going to apologize to someone. And finally, strawberries—everything was good with the world. Elizabeth waited for a few minutes trying to decide which flavor it was that morning, but opened her eyes when she couldn’t. Jason was still sleeping next to her, his head on her shoulder for a change.

She didn’t remember waking up the night before and she wondered if that was a good sign. It was altogether possible that she’d had a few dreams that Jason had calmed down before she’d woken up. It happened often—and she never remembered it in the morning. Elizabeth pulled the covers back and slipped out of bed. She rummaged in the bag that Emily had brought and pulled out some sweat pants and a tank top. She couldn’t walk around forever in Jason’s shirt—no matter how safe she felt in it. She thought it had something to do with the fact that his scent was on the shirt and that made her feel protected.

She took a quick shower and changed in the bathroom. When she came out, towel drying her hair, Jason was still asleep. She took a few minutes to admire him—she’d gotten very lucky indeed. Not only was he was sweetest guy alive—but he had to be the sexiest one as well. She flushed and left the room before she got any bright ideas.

As she came down the steps, the smell of the pancakes grew stronger and Elizabeth frowned. Chocolate chip, bananas and strawberries. Maybe the system Elizabeth had developed had been wrong all along.

She entered the kitchen. “Morning.”

Emily glanced over her shoulder as she flipped another pancake. “Morning. You look better.”

Elizabeth smiled. “I feel better,” she admitted.

“Well, sit down. I’m almost done.” Emily tossed the last pancake and put it on the plate. “I’ve got chocolate chip, banana or strawberry. What kind do you want?”

“Mmmmm…” Elizabeth smiled. “Banana.”

Emily shot her a suspicious look. Had Elizabeth figured out her system? She shrugged and put two banana pancakes on a plate and tossed two sausages on as well. She gave the plate to Elizabeth and put a raspberry and a chocolate chip on her plate and added three sausages. She set her plate on the table and pulled the ketchup and syrup on the table.

“This looks great,” Elizabeth said, picking up her knife and fork.

Emily grinned. “Sonny taught me, so it should taste great, too.”

Elizabeth frowned looking around the kitchen. “There used to be five chairs.”

Emily squirted some ketchup on her plate. “I broke one.”

Elizabeth hesitated. “I’m sorry, Em.”

Emily set the ketchup down and looked at her oddly, “For what?”

Elizabeth sighed, “For not telling you, for not letting you in. I’m sorry.”

Emily hesitated. “I’m not going to pretend that didn’t hurt—because it did. I just wanted to help and you weren’t letting me.” She took a deep breath. “But I also know you, Beth. I know you better than almost anyone else.” Emily smiled briefly, “Other than Jason. And I know that you weren’t trying to hurt me.”

“I didn’t want to burden anyone,” Elizabeth said softly, staring into her plate. “You see what’s happened to Jason? I knew it would—I knew I’d depend on him if I told him the truth. I didn’t want to do it to you either.”

“Jason doesn’t mind,” Emily said. “He helps because you’re his friend and more importantly, because he loves you.”

Elizabeth bit her lip. “Why? I haven’t given him any reason—I haven’t done anything for him. All I’ve done is complicate his life. Why should he love me?”

Emily sighed. “Why should anyone love another person?” She smiled. “Why does my grandmother stay with my grandfather? Why does my mother continually forgive my father for his affairs? Love is many things, Beth, but none of them logical.”

Elizabeth smiled. “You stole that line.”

Emily grinned. “Cary Elwes was a smart man.”

“I believe William Goldman wrote that,” Elizabeth pointed out.

“But I’m right,” Emily insisted. “You can’t tell yourself you don’t deserve Jason. No one gets to make that decision but Jason. And if Jason didn’t want to help—he wouldn’t.”

“I want you to know that I love you,” Elizabeth said softly. “I love you as my sister—because as far as I’m concerned, you are my sister. You were my sister from the very first day I met you. And you’ve been there for me when Sarah didn’t want to be. I want you to know that the last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you.”

Emily cut her pancakes up and put a forkful in her mouth. She swallowed and took a sip of orange juice. “I want you to know….that I already knew that.” She smiled at her. “I know that the decisions you’ve been making about who to tell, who not to tell…none of them are rational thought out decisions. You go to Jason because he provides the comfort you need. I want you to know that you are my sister, too. And yeah, I’m angry at you. But it’s an irrational anger because you can’t control the way you feel. But I am pissed as hell at your father and I really wish you’d give Jason and Sonny the go ahead so we can get rid of him.”

Elizabeth smiled briefly. “Believe me, I’ve thought about it. But in the end…I can’t just have him offed. As easy as it would be…it wouldn’t help me. I need to face this. I need to be able to go to my father and tell him what he did to me. I need to tell him that he didn’t break me—that he didn’t ruin my life. And until I can do that, this won’t be over.”

Emily nodded. “I know. But it would make it easier on the rest of us. I know that’s not fair—but it’s not right that he’s walking around free as a bird because he knows that Jason doesn’t remember and he knows that you’ll never say anything. That’s unfair—that he doesn’t get the same nightmares—that he doesn’t wake up screaming. It’s horribly unfair, Beth, and I’d like to volunteer to show him real terror.”

“You know…” Elizabeth paused and stared off in space. “One night after a nightmare back at home, I sat up and plotted all the ways I could kill him without getting caught. It was right before my birthday and before I left…I guess it was coming down to the line. It was going to be him or me. So I plotted these plans…push him out a window, cut the brake lines…” She trailed off and sighed. “It makes me glad that he told me the truth when he did. Because I’m scared I might have done one of them.”

“But you didn’t, Beth and that’s what matters,” Emily said, reaching out and squeezing her hand. “You got out of the house and you’re here. With people who know the truth and love you. You’ve got this brother who’d do anything for you. I think if you asked Sonny for a star, he’d get it somehow. You’ve got Carly, who’d fight to the death to keep you happy. I really think that. You’ve got AJ, who…” Emily trailed off. “Who seems to make every situation lighter. Because no matter how sad and serious the problem is, AJ says something stupid and everything’s okay again. AJ still carries guilt around—a lot of it’s gone—but it won’t all be gone until Jason’s happy. And, Beth, he’s happy now. And everyone can see it. That’s why he loves you, because you make him happy.” She smiled. “You’ve got Jason, who thinks you’re a strong person, who doesn’t try and control you…he lets you come to him. He loves you, Beth and he’d do anything for you. And, you’ve got me. I’m all those people wrapped into one. I’ll fight anyone for you—and I’ll get you a star if you want. I’ll wait for you to come to me and I’ll steal a line from The Princess Bride. I’ll do all that…” Emily paused and grinned. “Because you’d do that for me. Because we’re not just friends. And we’re not just family. We’re both and that’s better than the two separately. And I want you to know that I will always be here—even if you end up breaking Jason’s heart, even if you never face your father and even if you try and push me out, I’ll be here anyway.”

Elizabeth was crying by the time Emily had finished speaking. She didn’t know what to say—but it didn’t matter. She stood up and pulled Emily to her feet and pulled her into a hug. She didn’t have the words to tell Emily that she was sorry for shutting her out or that Jason made her happy, too. She didn’t know how to tell Emily that sometimes when it got really bad…she didn’t just think of Jason. She did think of him, but she’d remember Emily and AJ, too. She’d remember some silly conversation she and Emily had had or something funny AJ had said. That it wasn’t just Jason that kept her going—that it was him and their friendship.

Because even though Elizabeth couldn’t find the words to tell her all those things, she knew Emily knew them anyway.

Because like Emily said, they weren’t just friends and they weren’t just family. They were both—and that made all the difference.

Author’s Note: The “Love is many things, Beth, none of them logical” is from The Princess Bride. The actual line (in the movie, I can’t remember how it is in the book) “Love is many things, Princess, none of them logical.” It’s spoken by Westley. Both the book and the movie are spiffy and I recommend them. 

This entry is part 21 of 29 in the Surviving the Past

Jason jerked his eyes open as he felt Elizabeth begin to struggle.

“Stop…stop…”

He tightened his arms around her, and rubbed her back. “Shh…it’s all right…I’m here. No one’s going to hurt you.”

After a few more minutes, her forehead smoothed and she relaxed. Jason sighed and looked around the room. Sonny was curled up in the chair that Carly had sat in the night before. Emily and Carly were on the floor, wrapped in blankets. He turned his head and checked the clock. It was just after six in the morning. He’d been up until almost three before dozing off. It had been the worst night of his life. Elizabeth had woken no less a dozen times. Once, she hadn’t been struggling—she’d just bolted up in the bed, screaming.

Jason was running out of ideas. As long as she was asleep, he could help. He could hold her and make her feel safe. But sooner or later, she’d wake up. And once that happened, Jason would be lost.

He couldn’t believe that Sonny, Carly and Emily had all camped out last night. Sonny and Emily had made a casserole—which they’d eaten upstairs. Conversation had been at minimum—almost none.

It was Monday and Jason knew he should wake Carly and Sonny for work—but they’d been up with Elizabeth most of the night as well. If Carly wasn’t in, he didn’t see Laura getting worried and Sonny ran the warehouse after all.

He felt Elizabeth shift again. He looked down to see her eyes open. “Hey,” he said cautiously.

She licked her lips. “Hi,” Elizabeth replied softly.

“How you feeling?” he asked.

She shifted again. “Like a truck hit me.” She rolled to her side and noticed Sonny on the chair. “Why’s Sonny here?”

“He was worried about you.” Jason moved his head to gesture at Emily and Carly. “So were they.”

Elizabeth followed his head to look at her friends wrapped in blankets on the floor. “Oh.” She raised her eyes to meet his. “I’m sorry.”

“Why?” he asked.

“Because I freaked out,” she whispered. “Because I let him get to me.”

“Hey, you have nothing to be sorry for here,” Jason said, touching the side of her face lightly. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

She shook her head. “I took a hundred steps back. I’m right back where I was two years ago.”

“No, you’re not.” He shook his head.

“Yeah, I am,” she whispered. “I couldn’t even function and all I could do was fall into that routine—the perfect father, perfect daughter act that I thought I’d left behind.”

“Do you want to tell me what happened?” Jason asked.

She shook her head. “Not right now.”

“All right,” Jason agreed. “Whenever you’re ready.”

“Did I wake up a lot?” she asked.

“Yeah,” Jason replied. “But you’ve pretty much been asleep the last three hours.”

“I’m sorry—I know this isn’t what you signed up for…” Elizabeth looked away.

“Hey,” he said softly, cupping her chin and forcing her to look back at him. “I told you—I love you.”

She bit her lip. “I know, but I don’t think you want to spend your time coddling me-”

“Well, you’re wrong.” He brushed her hair out of her eyes. “Because I’m in this—for better or worse, you’re stuck with me.”

She curled up against his side and laid her head on his chest. “That doesn’t sound that bad.”

—-

Sonny jerked away when the elbow his face had been resting on slid off the arm of the chair. He blinked his eyes, feeling the ache of sleeping on a chair come through. He looked around. Elizabeth and Jason were sound asleep on the bed, and Emily and Carly were still wrapped in blankets. He checked the clock on the nightstand—eight in the morning. He stretched and stood, studying Elizabeth.

She looked peaceful—one would never guess that she’d woken up constantly, haunted by nightmares. Sonny would never forget the sound of her terrified screaming. But now, curled up against his best friend’s sleeping form, one would think he was intruding on a sleeping couple.

He went downstairs and pulled out his cell phone. He placed two quick calls—one to Laura saying Carly wouldn’t be in and the other to his secretary at the warehouse. None of them were going to work today.

After putting his cell phone back in his pocket, he made his way into the kitchen and began cooking again.

—-

Emily rolled over and smacked her head against the bed. She kept her eyes closed for another few seconds, grumbling. Even starting on the floor was getting her nowhere. Remembering her reason for being on the floor of Jason’s bedroom, she sat up. She was relieved to see Elizabeth sleeping peacefully.

Carly was still asleep, but Sonny was gone. Emily sniffed the air—he was cooking again. She unwound herself from the blankets and shoved herself to her feet. She ran a hand through her messy brown hair and straightened her shirt and smoothed her khakis. She should make a quick trip down to the apartment for a change of clothes for the two of them.

Emily made her way down the steps and into the kitchen. “Hi.”

Sonny glanced over his shoulder from where he was scrambling eggs. “Morning.”

“Anything I can do?” Emily asked, washing her hands.

“Toast,” Sonny suggested.

Emily got a loaf of bread out of the cabinet. “Do you think the nights Beth has spent here have been like last night?”

Sonny didn’t even pause in his scrambling. “I don’t know. I didn’t realize she spent nights here.”

Emily put two pieces of bread in the toaster and pushed the lever down. “Yeah. She’s spent a lot of nights here.” She looked at Sonny. “I know it was strictly platonic until Friday.”

Sonny shrugged. “I hope it wasn’t as bad,” he said. He pulled a plate out of the cabinet an started spooning the eggs onto it. “I’d hate to think Jason had to handle it by himself.”

Emily pulled a package of bacon out of the fridge and handed it to Sonny. “Beth told me what happened a few weeks ago…but once she told Jason, she started going to him. I guess it came easy to her—going to Jason for support. I tried to help the best I could, but the only nightmare that I saw before tonight was that first one. Any of others, I didn’t hear or she was with Jason.”

“He loves her,” Sonny said quietly. He flipped a few piece of bacon in the pan.

“Yeah, I know.” Emily put another two slices in the toaster. “And I know he’ll stick this out—because he doesn’t give up. And he won’t let her give up either. I think Beth needs that. Otherwise…she might just try and curl up in herself.”

Sonny looked away. “Sometimes that seems easiest. You don’t want to burden the people you love, so you don’t tell them.”

“But in the end, you only end up hurting yourself and the very people you’re trying to protect,” Emily remarked bitterly.

—-

Carly shifted in her sleep and frowned. This wasn’t her bed—her bed was soft and warm and comfortable. Whatever she was sleeping on now wasn’t soft and it sure as hell wasn’t comfortable. She sat up and rubbed her eyes.

And remembered that she’d spent the night in Jason’s bedroom. She sighed and looked up at the sleeping couple on the bed. Elizabeth was curled up next to Jason, her arms clutching at him. Even in sleep, Elizabeth was afraid to be alone. Well, at least she was sleeping.

Carly rolled her shoulders trying to work out the kinks. What a long night—she’d thought her nightmares had been bad. She’d never forget the bone chilling sound of Elizabeth’s shriek as she bolted up in bed. She shivered remembering the glazed look in her eyes. Elizabeth hadn’t been there in the room—she’d been fighting some monster only she could see.

She idly wondered how much sleep Jason got when Elizabeth spent the night. She hoped the nights weren’t as bad as last night had been. She didn’t want Jason to have to deal with this by himself. She made a promise to herself to pay much closer attention to Elizabeth from now on.

She sniffed the air and smiled. Sonny was cooking. She unwound herself from the blankets and made her way downstairs, following the scene of eggs, bacon, sausage and toast. Maybe she could make some orange juice.

—-

Jason heard the third click of the door and opened his eyes. He’d been waiting for everyone to leave so he could have a talk with Elizabeth without worrying about anyone else to overhear. He wanted to give her space—but he had to know what had happened the previous night. It was a selfish reason—he’d wanted to be sure there had been nothing he could have done to prevent it from happening. He knew he should have gone into the diner with her—he’d offered but she’d turned him down. He should have gone in anyway.

He flicked his eyes down to Elizabeth, but her head was turned away from him, her curly hair blocking her face. He could hear her breathing deeply and evenly—she was still asleep. He’d stay in bed all day if it meant she’d have a restful sleep, free from nightmares.

But Jason knew he couldn’t guarantee her sleep would ever be free of those dreams. And he knew he couldn’t keep her safe. He’d been right outside Kelly’s and Jeff had gotten to her anyway. He didn’t know why she turned to him—he’d done nothing for her.

He’d been hoping she’d wake up, but she didn’t and he didn’t have the heart to do it. No matter how strong his curiosity was—her health was more important.

The door clicked open softly and Sonny came in, bearing two plates. “I wasn’t sure if you two were up,” he apologized.

“She’s still sleeping,” Jason said quietly. “And I don’t want to wake her.”

“You’re going to have to get up sometime,” Sonny said. Jason shrugged the shoulder Elizabeth wasn’t attached to.

“I’ll get up when she gets up.”

Sonny set the plates down the dresser. “Carly and Em went home to get showered and changed. They’ve both decided to camp out here—they’re determined not to let you help by yourself.”

Jason managed a weak smile. “Maybe they can do more than me.”

Sonny knitted his eyebrows together. “What do you mean?”

“I was outside the diner when she saw him…he was that close and I let her go in a lone. I should have gone in—”

“Why didn’t you?” Sonny asked.

“Because Elizabeth told me she wouldn’t be long,” Jason answered.

“Then it’s not your fault,” Sonny said simply. “This is no one’s fault except Jeff Webber.”

“I can’t protect her…” Jason looked away, his hand absently stroking Elizabeth’s hair. “That’s all I want to do and I can’t do that.”

Sonny sighed. “Look, don’t blame yourself. Remember, she needs someone to talk to and you seem to be it, so try not to let the blame come in.”

Jason nodded. “All right.”

“I’ll put these in the oven,” Sonny said picking up the plates. “I’m going home to change and shower, but I’ll be back. Oh, and you need to replace one of your kitchen chairs.”

Jason frowned. “Why?”

“Emily broke it.” Sonny hesitated. “She was upset last night and needed to vent. The chair got in her way.”

“Not a problem,” Jason replied.

“I’ll see you when I get back.”

—-

While at the apartment, Emily placed two quick calls to AJ and Nikolas. She cancelled their Law and Order date for that date and told AJ that if it was at all possible to hurry home soon. She decided to pack a few changes of clothing for each of them—she had no idea how long Elizabeth would stay with Jason this time and Emily had decided to stay there.

While she was in Elizabeth’s room, she came across a photo album that she hadn’t seen before. Frowning, she pulled it out of the drawer and sat on the bed. She opened it to the first page and smiled immediately. There was a picture of seven-year-old Elizabeth and nine-year-old Jason…at some party. Flipping through the book, she realized it was full of pictures of Elizabeth and Jason. Most Emily hadn’t seen before. She frowned wondering when her best friend and brother had found all this time to take pictures.

The last picture in the book was a recent one—Emily grinned. Elizabeth was still putting pictures in the book. Emily had pulled her camera out at the reunion dinner while still eating and snapped a bunch. Elizabeth had picked them up from the developing place and she’d obviously confiscated a picture of her and Jason sitting next to each other, talking. They were smiling at each other and Elizabeth looked really happy.

Emily closed the book and put it inside the bag to take to Jason’s. Maybe some of the good memories would help. Remembering her new knowledge of Elizabeth’s love of writing, she packed her laptop and disks and left the apartment.

She was determined to help Elizabeth whether Elizabeth liked it or not.

—-

Emily stepped off the elevator just as Carly passed by. Both women smiled—they were both lugging bags.

“Guess we’re all moving in.” Carly’s smile was weak.

Emily nodded firmly. “Beth has been trying to keep this to herself—she’s really only let Jason comfort her. I want to help her.”

Carly nodded. “I know,” she said quietly. “But I don’t think there’s much we can do.”

Emily sighed. “The only thing I can think of is probably not any help.”

“If it involves Jeff Webber, a rope and a long ride in the country, it might help me,” Carly muttered.

“Actually it was Jeff, a candlestick and a conservatory,” Emily replied weakly. Carly laughed a little.

Emily squared her shoulders and stared at the penthouse door. “Do you think she’d mind if we sicced Jason on him?”

Carly shrugged. “When she calms down, I’m gonna ask.”

“So, what do I do when I go in there?” Emily asked softly.

Carly put her arm around Emily’s shoulder. “Go and cook with Sonny in the kitchen.”

“What’re you gonna do?” Emily asked.

“Sit on the couch and stare into space going slowly insane.”

“So, if we’re not actually going to do anything to help, why we going?”

“Because at this point, we need to show her that we’re there for her. That nothing can make us turn away.”

Emily smiled. “That I can do.”

—-

Elizabeth emerged from the bathroom, wearing one of Jason’s shirts that fell to her knees. She was towel-drying her hair. “Hey.”

Jason stood. “Hey.”

She twisted the towel in her hands. “They’re all downstairs aren’t they?” Elizabeth asked quietly.

“Yeah.” Jason’s mouth upturned in a half smile. “Carly and Emily came with luggage. Emily brought you some things.”

Elizabeth sat on the bed. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” she whispered. Jason crouched in front of her. “I was so happy yesterday—I loved you, I had good friends, great family. I felt like my life was finally coming together.” She raised her watery eyes to meet his. “Why did he have to come back? Why couldn’t he just have stayed away?”

“I don’t have any answers,” Jason said, regretfully.

“That makes two of us,” Elizabeth whispered. She sighed. “Do I have to go down there?”

Jason shook his head. “No. But if I bring you up dinner, you have to promise me you’ll eat. You haven’t eaten anything all day.”

“I know I’m being a burden-” she started.

“You’re not a burden,” Jason cut in swiftly.

She smiled. “You know…I think I believe that.” Elizabeth tightened her hands on the towel. “I don’t know how long it’ll be before I can get to where I was before I walked into that diner. Maybe it’ll be days, weeks…or another two years.” She met his eyes. “I want to know if you’d…if you…” she trailed off.

“Wait?” Jason finished. She nodded numbly. “You’re not just the woman I’m in love with…you’re my best friend. I’d be here whether we were together or not.”

“Thank you,” she said quietly.

“I’m sorry, Elizabeth,” Jason said. “I wish I’d gone into the diner with you.”

She sighed. “It wouldn’t have done any good, Jason. I still would have seen him. So, believe me, this isn’t your fault. And, I think I almost believe that it’s not my fault. I don’t think it’s anyone’s fault. Maybe…I needed to realize that I can think I’m past this all I want…but until I can face him—and tell him exactly what he did to me…it’ll never be over.” Elizabeth bit her lip. “It might be a good long time before I can do that…” she paused and took a deep breath. She wiped her eyes and gave him a weak smile. “But I will do it. One day, I will tell him what a monster he is.”

“I know you will,” Jason said firmly. “You’re strong.”

Elizabeth nodded. “But I still need you anyway.”

“You have me,” Jason promised her, grasping her hands in his. “Always.”

“Good,” Elizabeth said quietly. “Because I love you and one day I’m going to love you and be with you the way you deserve.”

Jason took a deep breath. “Just being here…in this room…with you is more than enough for me.”

“Thank you,” Elizabeth breathed, touching his face. “For being there last night.”

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

This entry is part 14 of 24 in the A Few Words Too Many

There’s a light at each end of this tunnel,
You shout ’cause you’re just as far in as you’ll ever be out
And these mistakes you’ve made, you’ll just make them again
If you’d only try turning around
– Breathe (2AM), Anna Nalick

Monday, August 25, 2003

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Francis pushed open the door, with a smirk on his face. “Mrs. C is here, Miss Webber.”

Elizabeth, at the base of the stairs, rolled her eyes. “Francis, he’s upstairs and I doubt he cares what you call me—”

“No time for this, Muffin.” Carly stepped through the door, a cardboard box in her arms. “There’s ice cream in here and it’s going to melt.” She narrowed her eyes at a thud from upstairs. “What’s going on?”

“They’re taking apart some of the furniture in one of the guest rooms.” She stepped forward. “What’s with the food?”

“My brain must be oozing out of my ears,” Carly said, following her to the kitchen where she set the box on the table. “Sonny’s going to be here in a few hours, and I forgot I got lax about junk food. It’s bad enough he knows where I hide the Oreos and the candy bars. If he finds out the ice cream was in there…”

Elizabeth laughed and started to unpack the box. “Well, at least since Sonny’s back that means he’ll be kicking you out again, so you can just come over here and stuff your face.” She put the pistachio ice cream in their freezer.

“There is that benefit.” Carly glanced out the doorway where she saw several men carrying down a headboard. “Why are you cleaning out one of the guest rooms?”

Elizabeth hesitated and then ducked her head, still not sure that it was all happening. “A few weeks ago, Jason suggested I pick which room I wanted for the nursery. I kept changing my mind, but I decided yesterday.”

Jason suggested?” Carly pursed her lips. “Well, huh, maybe he was listening.” She unwrapped a candy bar and split it in half, offering one side to Elizabeth. “So…that does that mean things are better?”

“They’re…different,” Elizabeth allowed. They still weren’t talking about what the baby would mean for their relationship, if Jason intended on being her father in truth, and not just in gossip, but she didn’t feel the crushing weight of not being able to talk about how tired she was sometimes, or how her feet hurt.

“Hmmm….” Sounding unconvinced, Carly chewed her chocolate. “I’m having lunch with Mama later, but afterwards, I could always bring some of my books over so we can work on color schemes. I have to settle on Morgan’s nursery colors since he’s due in five minutes.”

“That wouldn’t suck,” Elizabeth said. “Jason and Sonny will probably spend half the afternoon getting caught up anyway.” She smiled and shook her head. “Since it’s not like they can discuss their business over the phone.”

“True story.” Carly popped the last piece in her mouth. “All right, I’ve delivered my known contraband, so I’m going to do another sweep, make sure I didn’t miss anything.”

“I know you bitch about Sonny’s nutrition issues, but I think you enjoy the crap out of figuring out how to get your junk food anyway,” Elizabeth remarked as she walked the blonde to the door, already opened.

“I do,” Carly admitted, “because he knows that I’m doing it, but he can’t figure out how. I just hope he doesn’t realize you’re my dealer until this kid is out of me.” With a wave, she left. “Later, Muffin.”

Elizabeth rolled her eyes and turned around to see Jason heading down the stairs. Behind her, Francis closed the door. “Hey, did they finish?”

“Yeah,” Jason replied. He slid his hands in the pockets of his jeans. “But they left the carpet where it is. I didn’t know if you wanted to change it.”

Elizabeth shrugged. “I can make it work, I’m sure.” She hesitated, feeling a bit apprehensive. Things were better, but they weren’t where they needed to be, and more than once since Jason had suggested setting up a nursery, she’d been urged by Nadine to just talk to the man.

She knew she should. She knew they had to, but she just…wanted more time.

“Carly was by dropping off her junk food,” she said finally. She twisted her fingers in the skirt of her strapless maxi dress. “She said Sonny’s on his way back.”

“Yeah.” He stepped forward took her hands in his, stilling her restless fingers. “But it won’t be like it was last month. Things are calmer.” But the unspoken for now hung between them, and she was determined to put on a brave face for him.

“I’m not worried about that.” She bit her lip, because she hated bringing it up, but knowing she didn’t have a choice. “I know we don’t talk about it much, but I haven’t asked in a while about…” She paused. “Well…your search for Ric.”

Instead of tensing up as she had expected, he just sighed and led her over to the couch. He sat and she curled up next to him. “I told you we had to scale it back when things started to get…complicated here.”

“I know, and I understood.” She really did. For all they knew, Ric had given up after the kidnapping attempt fell through, and there was no point in Jason and Sonny leaving them unprotected on one side to search for a possibly non-existent threat. “I just think we’d all be better off if he wasn’t hanging over our shoulders.”

“I know. I’m hoping we can ramp it back up now that things are under control,” Jason said. “I’d like this resolved before you have the baby.”

Elizabeth frowned, because she wasn’t really sure what that meant. Feeling a little brave, she cleared her throat. “Because you’d like me out of here by then?” she asked softly.

He drew his brows together, and he met her eyes, his own filled with bewilderment. “No. I just…I know your blood pressure is back where it needs to be, and you’ve been healthy. I just…don’t want you worried about it.” He laced their fingers together and stared at their hands. “I told you…I wanted you here. I—I know I haven’t…always made it easy.”

“No,” Elizabeth confessed, “but neither have I.” She rested her head on his shoulder, her forehead against his cheek. “We’re still just living in the moment, Jason.”

“I know.” His was voice was low, almost hoarse. “I know that.”

“This summer has meant so much to me…to finally be with you, to look at you and not have to hide how I feel…but I can’t live in the moment forever.”

His chest rumbled as he exhaled. “I know. We need to…figure out what’s next.”

She nodded, closing her eyes. She didn’t want to read into his words, but she knew a part of her wondered if the reason Jason had such difficulty bringing up the future with her was because he didn’t think they had one.

Corinthos Penthouse: Living Room

Jason nodded to Max, who opened Sonny’s door. He’d rather be across the hall, watching Elizabeth sketch or read, or do anything. Every moment he spent with Elizabeth felt bittersweet now, because he thought they had almost agreed that what they had was all about the moment, and he knew what she meant about it not lasting forever.

He’d known that all along, but it was the first time either of them had really broached what that might mean. He’d agreed to set up a room for the baby, and hesitantly brought the topic up several times so she’d know she didn’t have to hide it anymore. He hated that she’d felt that way, but he couldn’t go back and change the past. He could only make it better.

“Hey, Jase.” Sonny poured a glass of water. “Carly’s out to lunch with her mother. Liz across the hall?”

“Yeah.” He rubbed his chest, absently. “She still doesn’t leave the penthouse much, which I know drives her crazy. Mostly for the hospital or lunch with her grandmother. Sometimes Carly takes her shopping.”

“Yeah.” Sonny grinned. “Carly mentioned she’d been spending more time than she felt comfortable about with the Muffin.” He shook his head as he sipped the water. “I’d tell her to stop with the nickname, but I think it’s a term of endearment at this point, which pisses Carly off. So really, it’s kind of funny.”

The odd truce that had sprung up between the two women was actually entertaining, Jason had to admit. He was still wary of them spending time together, sure that at any moment, Carly would revert to form, but she was proving him wrong. Carly had always said in the end she was loyal to him first, which explained why she’d stopped hanging out with Courtney, but this was the first time he actually believed that might be true.

“Anyway.” Sonny sighed and set the glass down. “Let’s get down to it.” He crossed to the desk and flipped through some folders. “I got a guy on computers. He’s annoying as hell, because I’m not entirely sure he speaks English and drinks too much orange soda. He’s at PCU, which means he’s younger than I’d like, but Stan told me he’s a crafty motherfucker.” He handed a file to Jason. “Damien Spinelli. He managed to track the money that’s been skimmed off from the casinos to a series of shell corporations. He said he’s still tracing it to the original account holder, but it might take time.”

“So we still don’t know who’s behind this?” Jason glanced at the file on the new hacker and then closed it. He’d go over it more detail later. “Or why they came at us so hard last month, and then just drew back without warning? I don’t like it, Sonny.”

“Me either.” Sonny rubbed the corner of his mouth with his index finger. “It makes me surer we’re dealing with Ric and Faith. I don’t know where they’d get the resources, but that kind of haphazard attack tells me they’re running low. Maybe they thought all the problems would distract us from Elizabeth’s security.” He shrugged. “Not a chance, but I guess they don’t know that.”

“I just…” Jason looked at the ceiling, annoyed at the world. “I just wish we knew if it is Ric, if he’s after you, or still after Elizabeth. If he believed us when we told him it was my child. I don’t know, and I hate not knowing.”

“I underestimated the son of a bitch,” Sonny growled. “He was impatient. Didn’t get the reaction he wanted from you about Liz, so he went after my wife. But he didn’t even bother trying to seduce her or being her friend. He went right for blackmail. It didn’t feel like he had an exit plan.”

“I should have taken him apart the second I saw him going after Elizabeth,” Jason muttered. “I wanted to.”

“Yeah…well…” Sonny rolled his shoulders. “I figured he was so sloppy before, he’d be that way again. But I don’t know, man…if he’s still focused on Elizabeth…”

Jason saw hesitation settle over his friend’s features, and tensed. “What?”

“I think…” Sonny said slowly, “that he was impatient when he was dealing with me, but I’m beginning to wonder if he ever believed Elizabeth was pregnant with your child.” He held up a hand when Jason opened his mouth to protest. “Hear me out. It was a good plan, and I went along with it. It may have made her life difficult for a while, but it offered her a level of protection that she just wouldn’t have had otherwise. But it’s like…Ric is holding on to that, and I keep remember how you said he threatened her.”

“He said he wouldn’t be separated from his child.” Jason scrubbed his hands over his face. “So he’s been screwing with us this whole time. He made us think he believed me when he went straight for Carly and Courtney. He wanted to exact the maximum damage. He knew it was a ploy, and that’s why he announced it to an entire goddamn diner.”

“We were distracted then. By setting up this story, by getting Elizabeth’s security detail settled.” Sonny nodded. “And while we were dealing with the Families and Elizabeth’s safety, he came after the business.”

“Because he thought we might shift our focus again.” It was so goddamn clear now. How the hell had they missed this? “What are they going to do now? They still can’t get to her. I barely let her out of my sight. She has two guards on her when she leaves, and two more she doesn’t even see. We sweep the cars she uses before they get close.” He was going to crawl out of his skin, because all of this meant Ric was still focused on Elizabeth and the baby. He hadn’t fixed a goddamn thing yet.

“Ric has to figure she’s getting close to her due date. I can’t…” Sonny paused. “I can’t decide if he thinks it’d be better to grab her now, and wait for the baby to be born or wait until the kid is here. But it’s insane at this point. He has to know that after all the trouble we’ve gone to protect her, that we’re still sticking with the story…he has to know we’d protect the kid as much as Elizabeth.”

“Which means he’ll be desperate and looking for any opportunity.”

Kelly’s: Courtyard

Carly entered the courtyard, Rocco just steps behind her. She hoped like hell Courtney wasn’t working today. She hadn’t seen her in the two weeks since their last run-in and good riddance to her. Why the hell she’d thought that simpering twit was good enough for her best friend, she’d never know.

She wasn’t even sure the Muffin was good enough for him, but they were stupid for each other, which meant Carly hoped they got their shit together and stopped causing her stress.

“Carly?”

The sound of her name had her pausing in front of the door. She turned to find Elizabeth’s grandmother and the nurse from the hospital at one of the tables. “Oh, hello, Mrs. Hardy.”

Audrey smiled at her and got to her feet. “Hello, how are you feeling?”

“Fat,” Carly said, always suspicious when upstanding people were nice to her, but she knew Audrey had been an unexpected source of support for her…not her friend, damn it. The Muffin. Audrey supported the Muffin. Damn her life. “Ready to have this baby.”

“Would you join us for a moment?” Audrey asked. She must have seen the confusion in Carly’s eyes, because she smiled. “Just a moment. We won’t keep you.”

“All right.” Carly gingerly lowered herself into the third chair and looked at the perky blonde nurse. Nadia. Nancy. Naomi. Frick. She needed to pay more attention. “Um…I’m not sure we’ve ever really…you know, met.”

“Nadine Crowell.” The other woman smiled. Nadine, that’s right. At least she was on the right track. “I’m sure you’re wondering why Mrs. Hardy and I cornered you.”

“Um…” Carly darted a glance at the elderly woman who had taken her seat again. “The thought had occurred to me.”

“It’s about Elizabeth,” Audrey said. “Nadine and I would like to have a baby shower for her, but we…” She cleared her throat. “I understand from my granddaughter that…for security reasons…” And though phrase clearly pained her, but Carly admired how the woman just forged on. “We may want to have it at the penthouse.”

“It’d be totally easier for gifts, too,” Nadine remarked and Carly wondered idly how anyone could be that goddamn chipper all the damn time. She kind of wanted to smack her to see if she’d stop smiling long enough to cry.

“It’s true that the penthouse would be easiest,” Carly agreed. And then she realized she’d somehow been roped into planning a baby shower for Elizabeth Muffin Webber.

God damn her life. Whatever happened to the bitch on wheels? Pregnancy. That’s what. She was going soft.

Morgan Penthouse: Nursery

Jason hesitantly pushed open the door to the newly designated nursery and found Elizabeth standing in the middle of the room, a sketchbook in her hand and tapping a pencil against her lips. She didn’t notice him right away, so he leaned against the door jamb. She was wearing another one of those stretchy, clingy dresses that told the world that she was pregnant. It should have bothered him—this constant reminder of their expiration date. That once she had her daughter, things between them would change, even end. And yet…it was impossible to ignore that Elizabeth Webber was one of those women who glowed when she was carrying a child.

Elizabeth glanced over and smiled. “Hey. I thought Carly said you were going to be late.”

“I have to go back out tonight,” he told her, “but I’m free for the next few hours.” He looked at her sketchbook. “Do you know what you want to do in here yet?”

Her eyes widened, and he knew she was surprised he was, once again, broaching the subject of her daughter.

She smiled and looked back at the walls. “Yeah. Carly came by while you were meeting with Sonny, and she lugged over almost ever decorating book or magazine she could find.” She chuckled, shaking her head. “Rocco was not happy, but I guess he figures better to keep her happy.” She tapped her pencil idly against the paper. “She’s still trying to visualize Morgan’s nursery, so she actually asked me for my opinion on that.” Elizabeth wrinkled her nose. “Carly and I haven’t argued in like four months, Jason. I don’t know what to do about that.”

This time his smile felt more natural. “Yeah, I know what you mean. Carly never ceases to surprise me. I thought she’d be the most difficult part of all this.”

“I know, right?” Elizabeth crossed to the windowsill to put down the pad and pick up a measuring tape. He hurried forward to take it from her. “Jason, I am capable of—”

“I’m taller than you,” he pointed out. “What do you need?”

She indicated she wanted the length of the walls, from corner to corner, to window, to door so she could make accurate furniture plans. As he did so, Elizabeth continued with their previous conversation. “Carly and I have been at odds for so long, I’m pretty sure that neither of us really remember why.” She hesitated. “Well, that’s not true. She hated me because of that December in my studio.”

“Yeah, she wasn’t a fan of you restricting my visitors.” Jason smiled now, remembering how fierce Elizabeth had been then. He’d seen the sparks in her all that fall, but he’d wondered if she’d be able to stand up to Sonny and Carly when he didn’t want to see them. The two were forces of nature, used to getting their own way, but they hadn’t been prepared for her.

“Hmmph.” Elizabeth folded her arms and lifted her chin. “Well, you didn’t want to see anyone. It was all I could do to make you see Bobbie.” She tilted her head to the side. “That time in my studio, that’s when I knew I was going to be okay. That I would be okay without Lucky. Before then, I was still kind of floundering, not sure how to get on with my life. But…I woke up one day when it was all over, and I realized…” He looked at her, and her cheeks were flushed.

“You realized what?”

“That you weren’t just my friend with the motorcycle,” Elizabeth admitted. “You weren’t just Emily’s brother.” She met his eyes. “You were Jason, and I…I really missed you.”

“I know what you mean,” Jason after a long moment. He wrote down the last measurement and set the tape back on the window sill. “I always knew who you were. I always kept an eye on who Emily was friends with, and I remember seeing you that night at Luke’s, when Nikolas was shot.” He leaned against the window. “And I remember you, with Lucky. That…night at the garage.”

“I only remembered you and Sonny later,” Elizabeth said. She crossed the room and leaned against the wall, facing him. “I remember falling, but not hitting the ground. Bobbie told me Sonny caught me.” Her eyes looked pained. “And I remember going to tell Sonny that I was so sorry Luke was blaming him because the fire had been my fault, caused by the candles I asked him to light.”

“But it wasn’t your fault,” Jason reminded her, hating the anguish talking about those days brought up. “And you know, Lucky’s alive.”

“I know.” Elizabeth exhaled slowly. “But not…not in the same way. He’s mostly okay now, but he’s not that boy anymore. That boy…the one you hired, that idolized Luke and Sonny…that Lucky never came back, and it took me a long time to accept that.” She forced a smile on her face. “But we were talking about how you thought of me before the studio.”

“Right.” Jason didn’t want to talk about Lucky anyway, though he found he was less bothered by her memories of Lucky before the fire then he was by the ones with the living breathing pain in the ass he always had to deal with. “There was the time you and Emily lied to Jake about me saying it was all right for you guys to go see some stupid band.”

Elizabeth laughed, and he was relieved that it was genuine. “Yeah. Oh, wow. I still don’t know why 98 Degrees was playing in some dive bar, but hey…if you hadn’t given us permission that night…I never would have gone that night you and I first…” She hesitated. “It’s weird, because I think of it as the night we met, but it’s not.” She bit her lip. “Or may be it is, because it’s the first time I looked at you and saw someone other than Lucky’s friend or Emily’s brother.”

“You liked the bike, I think,” Jason mused, and she pouted, punching him lightly in the shoulder. “But yeah. I know what you mean. After that, we were friends, but not the way…” He paused, because he didn’t know exactly how to explain this to her. “You took apart your entire life to take care of me. You let people think the worst about you, and you never…once backed down.”

“You needed me,” Elizabeth said. She rested her chin on his shoulder and smiled. “And it was fun, sometimes. It sounds awful, but I used to get a kick out of how everyone looked at me differently. Before I was just little Lizzie Webber, Audrey’s granddaughter, Lucky’s friend. Afterwards…” She laughed. “I was the ex-mistress of an alleged mob enforcer.” She wiggled her eyebrows. “It helped break me out of my shell.”

He laughed, glad she could look back on those accusations with a smile on her face. He’d hated the way Nikolas talked about her, the way he’d used Lucky to make her feel guilty for not wanting him. Jason should have punched him harder. “I’d never had anyone fight on my side the way you did,” he admitted. “If Robin had found me in the boxcar, she would have forced me to go to the hospital. She wouldn’t have listened to me about not wanting Sonny’s help. She would have insisted.”

“Well, about halfway up the stairs to my studio, there were times I wished I’d at least enlisted one of Sonny’s men,” Elizabeth teased, but she shrugged a shoulder. “I knew I could get your medications from Sonny. I knew Bobbie would help take care of you. You weren’t in any danger. Anyway, you just would have left the hospital.”

He chuckled, because of course she was right. In the hospital, he would have been subjected to Carly, to the Quartermaines, to anyone who wanted to walk in his door. And though her studio hadn’t been peaceful, what with Carly, Nikolas and her grandmother barging in all the time, she’d always showed up to kick them out. “How’d we start talking about this, anyway?”

“Carly.” Elizabeth reached around him for her sketchpad and the measuring tape. “Why she didn’t like me. Honestly, I figured I’d be hearing her screaming about this situation every other day based on how often I had to deal with her back then, but she’s been downright pleasant.” Elizabeth pursed her lips. “She’s not up to something, is she?”

“Oh, God, I hope not,” Jason said fervently. Carly with a plan was a dangerous thing. “I’m hoping she’s content with figuring out how to sneak her junk food past Sonny. I do not have the energy to worry about what schemes Carly might be into.” He rubbed his face, exhausted at the mere possibility. “Do you want order something for dinner? Or we could make something.”

“Hmm…” Elizabeth tapped her lip. “How long are you going to be gone tonight?” she asked. “Most of the night?”

“Probably,” Jason frowned. “I have to leave around nine.”

She reached for his wrist to look at his watch. “And it’s five, now.” She released his arm and wrapped her arms around his neck. “I think we should order out. So…that…” She pressed a kiss on the underside of his jaw. “We can do other things.”

“Yeah?” He grinned, resting his hands on either of her hips. “What other things?”

“Have I ever told you about the way a woman’s libido changes during pregnancy?” Elizabeth leaned back and arched an eyebrow. “Some women…don’t feel a difference. Some…can’t get in the mood. And others…” She danced the fingers of one hand down his chest until it rested at the waist of his jeans. “Can’t stop thinking about it.”

“Well, I guess, in that case…takeout is for best.” He slid his hand in her hair and drew her in for a fierce kiss, wishing it could always be as easy it was in this moment.

This entry is part 16 of 19 in the Daughters

Weep for yourself, my man,
You’ll never be what is in your heart
Weep, little lion man,
You’re not as brave as you were at the start
Rate yourself and rake yourself
Take all the courage you have left
And waste it on fixing all the problems that you made in your own head

– Little Lion Man, Mumford & Sons

January 3, 2006

General Hospital: Conference Room

Diane Miller was a lawyer in every sense of the word. She lived, ate and breathed the legal system. From the tip of her salon cut red hair to the soles of her designer heels, she exuded both confidence and superiority.

Sonny had recommended her to Jason and Elizabeth as someone who helped him out when his brother Ric wasn’t available. She was their go-to woman and Sonny trusted her with his life and freedom, which meant Jason did as well. Elizabeth wasn’t entirely sure but she was willing to try it.

At least until she ran out of money for the legal fees.

“I’m not going to lie to you, Miss Drake,” Diane said, making a note. “It will be extremely difficult to get your father off the hook for these charges.”

“I’m not worried about that right now,” Elizabeth replied. “I just need to get him arraigned and hopefully released on probation. He’s still in and out of consciousness with the drugs. I haven’t really been able to discuss anything with him.” She chewed her lip. “You should know upfront that I’ll be paying the fees but if Dad wants to take this to trial—”

Diane waved a hand, dismissing her. “The fees are taken care of. I’m on retainer for Sonny and he’s instructed me to bill him.”

“No…” Elizabeth shook her head. “No, I can’t accept this.”

“My dear, I am not exactly cheap,” Diane said, twisting her pen between her long fingers. “Sonny merely said that you were a close friend of his—practically part of the family. And Sonny’s family receives the best.”

“I suppose I’ll have to take it up with Sonny then,” Elizabeth sighed. She rubbed her eyes. “Do you have the information about his arraignment?”

“Yes. I imagine getting bail won’t be difficult, however…” Diane hesitated. “It won’t be cheap. With his prior record and the seriousness of the charges, it could be very steep. Is there perhaps a house or some other real estate that you might be able to put up as collateral?”

“Dad sold the house and I rent…” Elizabeth shook her head. “I guess I’ll have to cross that bridge when we get to it.” She stood and extended her hand across the table. “Thank you very much for coming on short notice, anyway. It means a lot.”

“Of course.” Diane paused. “On a personal note, I wanted to tell you how sorry I am that you seem to be going through this alone. This won’t be an easy time for you. I’d like to say that I could offer you an ear but I’m told I’m somewhat…” she lifted her hands in a shrug. “Lax in the area of compassion.”

“I have Jason,” Elizabeth said. “And some friends. I’m not alone.” She offered a thin smile. “But thank you for your concern.”

Diane nodded and gathered her materials before exiting. Elizabeth took another moment to gather her thoughts before following. She wasn’t alone, not really.

But she was pretty damn close.

Drake Home: Living Room

Will gingerly pushed open his front door and stepped into the house. He hadn’t been home since Christmas Eve and he hadn’t spoken to his mother since a disastrous call Christmas Day. It was hard to accept that his family had come so far in such a short time.

Two years ago, his father had been a well-respected cardiac surgeon at General Hospital, his mother a solid housewife and he’d been an honors student. Or so he’d thought. Shortly after Thanksgiving the previous year, Cheryl Drake had kicked her husband of eighteen years out of the house with very little warning to her son.

It was not something Will understood then. Sure, everyone knew Liam Drake was a social drinker—the life of the parties. Occasionally, he imbibed a bit too much but wasn’t that true of everyone? To Will’s sixteen-year-old eyes, nothing about that seemed wrong. The bills were paid, his dad went to work and came home. They had a nice house in a nice area of town.

But Liam was drinking more and more after his sister-in-law passed away because his brother Noah was drinking more and they’d always drank together. He was coming home later and later and his work performance was suffering. These were all things Will had learned later by interrogating family members and friends.

Now, Liam had moved to New York City to work and he and Cheryl were still duking it out in the courts. His mother was angry because she hadn’t worked in nearly twenty years and didn’t know how she was supposed to take care of the house or herself now. She’d started drinking to dull the reality of her situations months ago and that’s when things had become almost unbearable in his home.

Will sighed and stood in the entryway for a long moment. Alcoholism and bad relationships were the Drake legacy. He just hoped he wasn’t doomed to repeat it.

“Will?” His mother came out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on the dish cloth. Her eyes were red and her mouth pinched. “I…thought you were staying with your cousins.”

“I am,” Will said cautiously. “I came home to talk to you about some stuff and to get some things.” He looked at her for a long moment. “Mom….are you sober?”

Cheryl closed her eyes and nodded. “Three days without a drink. I heard about Noah’s accident and the little girl…” she shook her head. “Suddenly, my future looked kind of bleak. I looked around this house and you weren’t here.” She stepped towards. “Will, I’m so sorry for what I’ve put you through.”

“It’s okay,” Will shrugged and looked away. “You were going through stuff.”

“No, it’s not okay. I am your mother and that should be my first priority.” She gestured towards the sofa. “Let’s sit and talk for a moment. We have a few things to figure out.”

“Yeah.” He scratched his head and joined his mother on the sofa. “Uh, Mom, there are some things I need to tell you that you might not be happy about. Lu…” He paused. “Lu’s pregnant.”

Cheryl sighed. “Oh, dear. That’s unfortunate.” She hesitated. “You two are so young…surely you’re not going to keep the baby.”

“We’ve figured out a plan,” Will said. “We’re keeping the baby. Lu and I are going to finish school and her parents are going to help us out so we can both go to college and get our education. I’m going to stay at the Spencers to take care of Lu.”

“Will…” Cheryl reached out and grabbed his hand. “This is just a promising time in your life, I can’t help but feel you’re making a mistake. What kind of life can you give a child? You’re just babies yourselves.”

“Mr. and Mrs. Spencer said they’d support whatever decision Lu made and Lu wants the baby. It’s her decision to go through with it and she made it clear that she doesn’t expect anything from me. But that’s not what I want. I care about Lu, Mom—”

“Don’t be ridiculous—you can’t care about her enough to ruin your future!” Cheryl stood. “You’re going to be a doctor, Will. And teenage fathers never make it to medical school!”

“There’s no reason why I can’t continue on. I’ve got scholarships lined up and her parents made it clear they won’t allow either of us to sacrifice what we want—”

“That’s easy for them to say!” Cheryl planted her hands on her hips. “Their kid wasn’t going to amount to much anyway. What the hell was Lulu Spencer ever going to accomplish in life?”

Will slowly rose to his feet. “Mom, that’s not fair. We’ve made our decision—”

“The hell you have! I won’t allow it. I am your mother and until you are eighteen, I have the right to dictate what you do and where you live. You will come home immediately and I don’t want you to have anything to do with that girl or her family.”

Will sighed. He should have known this would end like this. Even if his mother had given up the alcohol, she was still the angry, bitter woman who’d kicked out his father. She was never going to understand this decision and she was never going to support it. He’d have to learn to accept that.

Quartermaine Estate: Foyer

Monica stepped in from the dining room, sipping her coffee. She was glad she’d arranged for her day off to coincide with her daughter’s. Since she’d broken off the engagement New Year’s Eve, Emily had been subdued and stayed in her room more often than not.

It was unacceptable and Monica wasn’t going to allow it to continue.

She watched Emily come in from her morning jog and pull off her parka and her earmuffs. She tugged her gloves off and shoved them in the pocket of the park. “How cold was it out there?”

Emily jumped and turned to find her mother, sipping her coffee. “Mom. Aren’t you supposed to be in work?”

“I took the day off.” Monica tipped her head towards the door to the dining room. “Why don’t you join me for breakfast?”

“I’m tired, I thought I’d lay down—”

“Join me,” Monica repeated in a tone Emily recognized. With a sigh, she followed her mother into the room and obediently filled a plate with food she knew she wouldn’t eat.

Monica took her seat and reached for a slice of grapefruit. “We haven’t had a chance to talk since you broke up with Nikolas.”

Emily’s hand stilled as she stirred sugar into her tea. “No one in the family has really said anything.”

“Emily, I hope no one influenced you to make this decision.” Monica remarked. She hesitated. “You seem to think that you have to work harder to be a member of this family. That you have to be something extra so that we’ll love you.”

“Mom—” Emily shook her head.

Monica reached over to cover Emily’s hand. “All you ever had to do was to wake up in the morning. You are my daughter and a member of this family, no matter who you marry.”

Emily bit her lip. “I think that you could probably make Dad and Grandfather go to the wedding and you could probably insist that they be nice to Nikolas on holidays and when we ran into each other in public but it would never be the same. Nikolas’s uncle is going back to Greece if we get married and Grandfather will never look at me the same way—”

“Emily, if you love Nikolas, that shouldn’t matter—”

“That’s what I told myself when we started dating,” Emily cut in. “And when Nikolas asked me to marry him, I told myself that what happened between our families wouldn’t matter. But that’s not true, Mom. My family…” She blinked away tears and swallowed hard. “You guys loved me when you didn’t have to. You took me in and kept me out of the foster system. Who knows where I could have ended up. You gave me a direction in life — I love being a doctor, I love my work at the hospital.”

“And we are all so proud of you, sweetheart. It was worth every heart ache of your teenaged years to get to this point,” Monica said. “But we are your family no matter what—”

“I am terrified that Nikolas will look at me one day and he’ll think it wasn’t worth losing his uncle. They’re so close, Stefan is like his father.” Emily paused. “And I’m scared that I’ll look at him and all I’ll see is the loss of my relationship with Dad and Grandfather. We’ll resent each other, Mom, and this beautiful love that we have…it will wither away and we’ll hate each other.”

“It doesn’t have to be like that, Emily—”

“I don’t see how it could be any be any other way. Family means everything to Nikolas and I. If we sacrifice our families to be with one another, how can we not resent one another down the line?” Emily shook her head. “It’s just not possible, Mom. I’d rather break our hearts now and be able to remember him with love than with hate.”

Monica couldn’t find it in herself to argue with that logic. She couldn’t deny that Emily certainly had a point. Alan and Edward would probably distance themselves from Emily. Not deliberately and not maliciously, but Alan knew his father hated the Cassadines. Nikolas would not be invited to any family gatherings and Emily would be forced to choose.

“Well, you know your own heart better than anyone else,” Monica murmured. She patted Emily’s hand. “But I am your mother and I will love you no matter what.”

General Hospital: Locker Room

“Fancy meeting you here.” Robin dropped onto the bench next to Patrick and put her hand on his forearm. “Ellie said you hadn’t been by all day.”

“Couldn’t.” Patrick stood and pulled open his locker. He tugged his scrubs off and reached for the pullover in the locker. “I know what you want me to do, Robin and I wish I could say I’d do it, even if was just for you…”

“Patrick…” Robin got to her feet and surprised him by wrapping her arms around his waist and pressing her cheek to his bare back. It was one of the things she’d always done to comfort him in the past and it was almost torture to have that for a moment. “All I want is for you and Ellie to be okay.”

Patrick turned and gripped her shoulders lightly. “He was arraigned this afternoon, wasn’t he?”

“Mmm-hmm,” Robin murmured. “They set bail but Ellie can’t pay it. Even so, Noah can’t be released from the hospital for another week so she’s not even going to worry about it.”

“How can she stand behind him?” he muttered. He pulled away from her and shoved the sweater over his head. “How can she support him after everything he’s put her through?”

“Because its family,” Robin said simply, “and Ellie’s never turned her back on family.” She paused. “Patrick, my heart aches for all the pain you’re going through but I can’t help but think…” she stopped and shook her head.

“Just say it, Robin. We both know what you’re thinking. I’m making myself miserable,” Patrick said sharply. “I’m the one who refuses to go see my father and I’m the one who’s leaving my sister alone to deal with this. God knows how she’s paying for the lawyer or how she’ll pay for bail.”

Robin pursed her lips and pondered her next statement. “Diane’s on retainer for Sonny Corinthos. He’s doing Ellie a favor.”

Instead of flying into a rage as expected, Patrick surprised her by sinking back onto the bench. “This is what I’ve been reduced. Sitting and doing nothing while the local crimelord plays hero. This is ridiculous.”

“He cares about her because she’s important to Jason,” Robin told him. “It’s not about playing hero. He knew she needed help and he did what he had to do to support her. That’s what friends do. That’s what family does.” She sat next to him. “Patrick, you don’t have to want to set Noah free to support each other. You just have to listen to one another. Don’t shut her out again because she might not give you a second chance to make it right.”

“I know you’re right but it’s just so hard…” He shook his head. “How can I face her after everything I’ve done to her?”

“You just have to walk up to her and let the rest of it take care of itself.” Robin touched his cheek. “Patrick, I would give anything to turn back the clock and change the way I left, the way I handled my illness. I have so many regrets. Don’t let Ellie be one of yours.”

April 20, 2014

madworldHey! Another large update today 🙂  I’ve decided to close the poll asking visitors to vote which story they want to read next because the votes are basically in and the numbers haven’t moved. So, the top three stories were Mad World (21 votes), The Best Thing (19 votes) and Counting Stars (12 votes). Once A Few Words Too Many and Daughters are finished, I’ll be focusing on Tangle, These Small Hours and Mad World.

It’s easier for me, in some respects, to have more than one story going at once since what I want to write depends on my mood, and these three stories are set in completely different time periods (Mad World is 2004, These Small Hours is 2008 and Tangle is 2008-2024).

daughtersI had a major break through with Words last night, and finished all but the last chapter, which I plan to do today and tomorrow. So I’m going to go ahead and continue posting that once a day.

I’m almost finished with the last two chapters of Daughters–I intend to juggle working on that in with the next episode of Damaged, but both might be slightly delayed as I have a major paper and presentation due next week.  I’ll be posting one chapter of Daughters a day until I either complete it or run out of chapters, at which point there may be a gap. (More likely to be a gap as I only have two chapters left to post, and Chapter 18 isn’t quite finished.)

I’ve also added the next four chapters of Surviving the Past 🙂past

Additions
Surviving the Past: Chapters 17-20
A Few Words Too Many: Chapter 13
Daughters: Chapter 15

This entry is part 20 of 29 in the Surviving the Past

“You should have seen her,” Emily said, twirling her fork in her pasta. She sighed, “So happy.”

Carly grinned at her from the other side of the table in the penthouse. “I don’t even care that we didn’t even get to put our plan into action.”

Emily nodded. “I know. They fell in love all by themselves…makes it better.”

“Yup,” Carly agreed. She frowned and checked her watch. “I wonder what’s keeping Liz. She only went to Kelly’s to get dessert.”

Emily shrugged, her eyes sparkling. “Maybe she ran into Jason.”

Carly pouted. “But I wanted my triple chocolate chip ice cream sundae.”

—-

Elizabeth strode into Kelly’s, her cheeks flushed. She had run into Jason and he’d given her a ride to the diner. But they’d gotten slightly…distracted.

She was in such a hurry that she didn’t hear Bobbie Spencer calling her name until it was too late. She had paid Tammy for the three sundaes and was turning around when she froze.

Bobbie, Lucky’s aunt, was smiling at her from a table and waving her over. Normally, Elizabeth would have no problem stopping for a chat. Bobbie and her late grandmother, Audrey Hardy, had been close and Elizabeth liked talking with Bobbie.

But today, Elizabeth’s eyes were trained on the head of silver hair—the slight profile. Most people wouldn’t recognize a person just from the back of their head—and Elizabeth never would have realized who it was if she hadn’t seen his hands.

The hands that she would never forget. The long fingers and smooth skin, marred only by a scar on the back of his left hand. She remembered that scar. She’d bitten him when she was fifteen. The pinky on his right hand didn’t have a nail.

She’d always remember those hands. The hands that had pulled her hair, smacked her, punched her, scratched her…the hands that had beaten her.

She stared at those hands nonchalantly resting on the table. Her breath was caught in her throat—she felt like she’d never breathe again. Her hands began to shake and she dropped the bag.

It fell to the floor with a soft thud and Elizabeth could see Bobbie’s face change from smiling to concern.

And then he turned.

And Elizabeth Webber saw Jeff Webber for the first time since he’d nearly thrown her out a window two years ago.

Bobbie stood and approached her. “Liz, are you all right?”

Elizabeth was trembling all over but she closed her eyes and forced for control. She had promised herself just yesterday that Jeff couldn’t hurt her—that he didn’t control her life. That she’d never give him that power again.

She took a deep breath and when Elizabeth opened her eyes, Bobbie took a deep breath of her own—in relief.

Elizabeth pasted a bright smile on her face and leaned down to pick her bag up. “I’m fine, Bobbie. It was just a surprise to see you here with my father.”

Jeff Webber had gotten up and came to Bobbie’s side. “Lizzie, it’s good to see you,” he said cautiously.

Elizabeth turned her fake smile towards the man that had haunted her thoughts and dreams. “It’s good to you, too… Daddy…” she said, forcing a cheerful note in her voice. She felt disgusting inside. How quickly she’d fallen back into her routine—pretending that Jeff was the perfect father and she was the perfect daughter. It came so easily to her—it always had.

Whether what he did next was for Bobbie’s sake or he just wanted to prove that he still had power over her, Elizabeth would never know. But she’d never forget the powerful waves of self-loathing and disgust that crashed over as Jeff leaned over to give her a warm hug and a kiss on the cheek. “You look as beautiful as always, Lizzie. Come by the house, I know your mother would love to see you.”

Elizabeth gripped the bag tightly—fearing what little control she had was about to snap. “I’ll do that,” she said, her voice still strong. “I have to go. Carly and Em are waiting. They must be worried. Good to see you, Bobbie… Daddy…” Elizabeth rushed out of the diner to where Jason was still waiting.

“Get me out of here,” she cried, throwing her leg over the back of the bike and clinging to him.

“Elizabeth-”

“Please!”

Worried about the note of terror in her voice, Jason turned the bike on, revved the engine and took off.

Inside the diner, Bobbie was shaking her head. “Elizabeth looks sick, doesn’t she Jeff?”

Jeff Webber looked at his old friend. “She didn’t look herself,” he agreed.

“I’ll bet she’s not eating right, living on her own with Emily,” Bobbie continued. “I don’t know why she insisted on moving out. Katherine would never say.”

“She’s living with Emily Quartermaine,” Jeff repeated. He tilted his head in curiosity. “How is Emily doing?”

Bobbie smiled. “Much better since Jason moved back home. She’s practically skipping her way through town.”

“Jason,” Jeff echoed. “And he still doesn’t remember anything?”

Bobbie frowned. “No. Why?”

Jeff tried not to look relieved as he smiled at Bobbie. “No reason. I just remember Lizzie was always close to him.”

—-

Jason didn’t take her back to the penthouse—he took her to Vista Point instead. Whatever had happened back at Kelly’s—he didn’t want to leave her alone until he knew she was okay.

Elizabeth off the bike almost before he’d pulled it to a complete stop. She let the bag of sundaes drop on the ground as she sank to her knees, hugging herself. She couldn’t stop shaking.

Jason was alarmed and crouched in front of her. “Elizabeth, what happened, what’s going on?”

“He touched me,” Elizabeth whispered. Her blue eyes were wide with terror—and glazed over. She wasn’t here with him—she was somewhere else. “I feel so dirty.”

“Who touched you?” Jason demanded.

“I hate him, I hate him, I hate him,” Elizabeth chanted, rocking back and forth. She was still shaking.

Jason pulled her against him and they were both sitting on the ground now. She started to cry hysterically—the sobs shaking her body even more. Her face was bright red and she was clinging to him as if he’d disappear if she let go. But what terrified him more than anything was her skin. It was only June and she felt like she’d taken a dip in an ice pond. She was freezing.

It was nearly ten minutes before Elizabeth’s tears slowed. “He was there,” she whispered, her voice hitching as if she’d break into a round of sobs at any given moment.

“Who?” Jason asked. But he knew. He knew the answer before she even said it. He’d never seen her like this—not even the night she’d woken up in the hospital. She was so terrified.

“My father.” She took a deep breath—she tried. But it got caught in her throat and she started crying again.

Jason closed his eyes. He didn’t always know what to say to her—but most of the time he managed to come up with something. But how could he reassure her that Jeff Webber couldn’t touch her?

He’d let her down. He’d never forgive himself. He’d promised her that Jeff wouldn’t get within a hundred feet of her and he’d never touch her again. And he’d broken that promise.

Jason tightened his arms around her. “I am so sorry,” he whispered, feeling the tears prick at his own eyes. This beautiful strong woman who’d faced Frank Verruchio down while laughing only a few nights ago was reduced to a terrified little girl just by the sight of her father.

“He touched me,” Elizabeth breathed, closing her eyes. “He hugged me and kissed my cheek like we were a normal family.” She took another deep breath and managed to do it this time. “And I let him! Oh, god, I let him touch me!” She tightened her grip on his shoulders and stared wildly in his eyes. “He touched me and I let him do it!”

He stared at her, helplessly. He could hold her after her nightmares and tell her she was okay. But how to do you convince someone that everything will be okay when you’re not even sure yourself?

In the end, Jason just closed his eyes and tightened his grip on her, feeling lost for the first time in his life.

—-

He’d taken Elizabeth back to the penthouse and put her in his bedroom. She’d cried herself to sleep nearly an hour later and Jason left then.

He went to Sonny’s apartment, knowing Emily and Carly were waiting for her. As soon as he walked in, Carly jumped up from her seat at the table.

“Have you seen Elizabeth?” Carly demanded. Emily stood and studied her brother’s face.

“Jason, what’s wrong?” she asked quietly. “You look…”

“What happened to Liz?” Carly cried. She grabbed his shoulders. “Something happened didn’t it? You’ve been crying—you never cry—”

Emily pulled Carly away gently. “Jason what’s going on?”

Jason looked away. “Elizabeth is asleep at my apartment. She, uh…” he looked up at the ceiling trying to keep himself in check. “She saw Jeff at Kelly’s.”

Emily gasped, her hand flying to cover her mouth. Carly stumbled back, her eyes wide. “Is she okay?”

Jason shook his head slowly. “No. She’s not.”

Emily started for the door. “I want to be there when she wakes up,” she said.

“Em, wait-” Jason said, holding the door shut. “You need to know—that I’ve never seen her like this. Not after any nightmares or even after the hospital.”

Emily turned back. “What?” Her eyes were wide and filled with tears. “What do you mean? What’s wrong with her?”

Carly took a deep breath. “She was shaking, her skin like ice to the touch.”

Emily and Jason’s eyes flew to Carly. “How-” Jason broke off.

“Because that’s the way I felt when my father showed up after he got out of jail,” Carly whispered. She looked away—towards the windows. “He’d been in jail for three years, I’d gotten my life back in order. I was even happy. My mother was doing better. I thought I’d put that behind me. But one day, he just showed up at the door. Out of the blue. No warning, nothing. And he hugged me.” Carly wiped her arm. “I’d never felt so disgusting in my life. I wanted to kick him, scream…”

Emily was staring at Carly. “Oh my God,” she breathed. “It happened to you, too.”

Carly met her eyes. “Yeah,” she said her voice cracking. “And my mother ignored it. For thirteen years, he beat me and she never wanted to see it. Sometimes it was so bad, it hurt to breathe. I wished that I would die. He started beating me before I could remember…my mother finally told me he’d hit me the first time the day I began to walk. I walked in front of the television…” Carly smiled through her tears. “I paused and fell…and he smacked me that day. And it never stopped until he went to jail when I was fourteen. For three years…I don’t even remember why he went. But when I was seventeen he came home and wanted to pretend that nothing had changed. And my mother…” Carly took a shuddering breath. “She wanted to pretend, too. But I couldn’t—I couldn’t do it. I ran away that day and I didn’t stop running until I came to Port Charles seven years later.”

Emily was crying silently, her hand still covering her mouth. Two of the people she loved in her life had suffered through so much—how was such cruelty possible?

Carly shook her head. “Don’t coddle her,” she said softly. “And don’t tell her it’s going to be okay. It won’t work. Because she believes right now that she’s weak. That she let him do this. Because no matter how much you think you’ve put it behind you, all it takes is one little reminder to bring you right back to reality—that it will never be over.”

Carly sat on the couch and curled up, clutching a pillow. Jason and Emily were still standing by the door. Neither knew what to do. Because comforting Carly wasn’t going to work and comforting Elizabeth didn’t seem to be an option. Because as Carly said, all the comfort in the world would never erase what had happened.

The scene was broken when Sonny entered. The door opened and bumped Jason in the back.

“Sorry, didn’t see-” Sonny’s words fell as he took in Jason’s pale face, Emily’s tears, and Carly curled up on the couch. “Carly…”

Carly looked up, her brown eyes drowning in tears. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “Sometimes it’s just too vivid to forget.”

Sonny dropped his keys on the desk and rushed to the couch, crouching in front of it. “Baby, what happened?”

“Jeff Webber,” Jason stated. Sonny ripped his eyes from his wife long enough to look at Jason. “Elizabeth saw in Kelly’s. He hugged her,” Jason said, the disgust dripping from his voice. “She’s terrified, Sonny. I have to go back to her before she wakes up alone.”

“I’ll go with you,” Emily said quickly.

“I want to go too,” Carly said quietly. Sonny looked back to her. “I want to be there for her. We have to, Sonny.”

Sonny nodded. He stood and offered her a hand.

—-

Jason went to sit by Elizabeth’s side and so did Carly. Sonny wanted to help—so he did the only thing he could.

He started to cook. Emily helped. Sonny had taught her to cook over the past two years and it was something the two of them often did together. She had developed a love of cooking that rivaled Sonny’s and like Sonny, she often sought comfort in it.

Sonny and Emily worked quietly for a while. They started with a casserole, Sonny’s reason being it was something that could be heated up.

“I don’t know what to do,” Sonny said finally. Emily closed the oven door and looked up at him. He was leaning against the kitchen counter, hands gripping the edges. “My sister and my wife are still as tormented as I am and I can’t help.”

Emily took a deep breath. “I don’t what to do, either. Because I just want to hug her and tell her everything will be okay and I can’t promise her that.”

“I could get rid of him,” Sonny said. “But the only person that would help would be me. Or Carly, Jason or you. We’d feel better. But she’d still go to sleep every night, his voice echoing, and the memories just at the edge of her brain waiting to attack.”

Emily looked away. “She was so happy,” she whispered. “She hadn’t stopped smiling all day. Why did this have to happen now?” Emily asked, the tears beginning to burn her eyes. “Why? Why Beth? Why Carly? Why does this have to happen to the people I love? How can people be so cruel to children?”

Sonny’s throat began to thicken as he stared at the crying, angry woman. “I don’t know,” he said hoarsely. “I wish I had the answers. But there are none.”

Emily suddenly grabbed a chair and threw it against a wall. “Damn it, this isn’t fair!” she cried. “I can’t help my best friend! I failed her when we were younger and I’m failing her now! All I want to do is kill him! I want to wrap my hands around his neck and hear his bones pop!” She was shaking as she continued, “I want to see the terror in his eyes, I want to see him struggling to breathe…I want him to understand what it’s like to be so scared you’re going to die and not being to control it!”

Sonny wrapped Emily in his arms, as her body continued to shake with the angry sobs. He couldn’t help but agree with Emily—it would be satisfying to rid the world of Jeff Webber. It would be worth it to see the look in his eyes—but in the end, nothing would help Elizabeth.

She’d have to fight this battle herself. But Sonny was beginning to wonder how many battles his sister would have to fight before she lost the war.

—-

Carly was curled up in a chair, staring at Elizabeth’s sleeping form. Jason was lying next to Elizabeth, holding her. She’d already had two nightmares, but Jason had been able to calm her down before Elizabeth had awakened.

“I wish I knew what to do,” Jason whispered into the dark room.

“There’s nothing you can do,” Carly replied quietly. “Other than what you’re doing. We can be there for her, but as much as we’d like to, we can’t fight her demons for her.”

“She laughed,” Jason said. “She laughed in Verruchio’s face when he called her a bitch. She wasn’t even scared.”

Carly had no idea what Jason was talking about but didn’t let that faze her. “She’s strong,” Carly said. “She can beat this.”

“I know,” Jason said softly, unconsciously tightening his arms around Elizabeth. “But how many times does she have to beat it?”

Carly rubbed her arms absently. “She’ll have to fight it the rest of her life,” she said, her voice almost too low for Jason to hear. “Because the terror she lives in every day will be present whether that scum lives here or in Europe. Because she’ll always hear his voice and she’ll always remember the way she felt—because those memories are always waiting to attack.”

“When does it get easier?” Jason asked. “Can you tell me if it ever does?”

Carly shrugged. “It does for some people and for others, it never does. But it takes time, Jase.” She sighed. “It might be a long time before she’s ready to continue a normal existence—be a normal girlfriend for you—”

“That’s the last thing I’m concerned about,” Jason cut in.

Carly smiled weakly. “Good. You know, I’ve done a lot of reading…” she sighed. “And I’ve found that most of what the doctors say about survivors of child abuse is shit. I know the statistics…that people were abused are more than likely to be abusers and that’s just not true. Because if anything…we know more than anyone else what’s it like to go to sleep at night—and wish you wouldn’t wake up.” She looked down at her nails which she’d been chewing on all night. “Sonny and I have chosen to support each other—but she’s chosen you to support her.” She found his eyes in the darkness. “Don’t ever let her regret that decision.”

This entry is part 19 of 29 in the Surviving the Past

Elizabeth shifted sleepily and snuggled closer to Jason. She didn’t want to wake up and find out that last night had been a dream. She wanted to believe that she’d admitted she was ready to be with him and that she’d wanted to make love with him.

And if it was a dream…well, Elizabeth would rather have a dream like that rather than ones that usually occupied her time.

As she became more aware of her surroundings, she realized that she was, in fact, naked. Her face flushed as she realized that he was, too. She smiled. So it had been real.

She’d heard so often that the first time hurt that she’d come to expect it—but other than a few moments, she hadn’t felt it. Jason had been so gentle and sweet…she almost couldn’t believe it. They had to go slow—Jason’s ribs were a little sore from the previous night.

Elizabeth opened her eyes slightly. The sunlight was streaming through the window—it was Saturday morning. She smiled. She’d never been so thrilled for a morning before. But today…today she was starting a new chapter in her life. She was going to put her past behind her and concentrate on the life at hand. On her job at Deception and her partnership with Sonny and Jason, on her friendship with Emily, AJ and Jason, on her family, on her writing…and on her relationship with Jason.

She’d never fully forget about her childhood—she wasn’t naïve enough to think that. But she wanted to forget the hold it had on her. Last night, she’d proved to herself that Jeff Webber would never be able to hurt her again. If and when he ever came back, she wouldn’t be the terrified emotionally and physically abused girl he’d left. She’d be a strong woman who had had to fight and claw her way back to life.

She wasn’t alone anymore—he could never hide the truth again. He’d never be able to look at Emily or AJ again without their knowing exactly who he was. And he’d never able to tell her Jason was going to leave her.

Because she knew without a doubt, that Jason wouldn’t leave her. Maybe he wasn’t in love with her yet, but Elizabeth trusted him with her life. She knew he’d never hurt her and it was only a matter of time before everyone knew exactly how happy she was.

She knew that she’d done most of the work herself—she was finally able to accept that. But she couldn’t deny that she’d had to motivation this time. She’d had a reason to let go, to finally move past the terror her father had put her through. Jason was her reason—and she didn’t care that she depended on his very presence in her life so she could breathe. She was in love with him and that something her father could never touch.

“I love you,” she whispered. She jumped when she felt Jason’s hand in her hair.

“I love you, too,” he said quietly.

She raised her head to look at him. “Really?” she said, eagerly.

Jason nodded, “Yeah.” He used his hand tangled in her hair to pull her closer to him. He kissed her softly. “I love you.”

Elizabeth bit her lip, blinking back tears. “I love you,” she repeated. “I don’t think I ever get tired of telling you.”

His hand drifted across her cheekbone. “I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of hearing it.”

Elizabeth laid her head back down and pressed a quick kiss to his chest. “You are by far the most beautiful person I’ve ever known,” she whispered. “I’ve never known someone who thinks of other people before himself…who lets people be exactly who they are without holding them back.” She looked up to meet his eyes. “And I can’t believe how lucky I am to be someone who gets to see that side of you.”

“You’re beautiful,” he said, running his fingers down her bare back, sending shivers through Elizabeth’s body. “You’re strong and you take control of your life. You could have done this without me and you would have been fine. I’m just glad you let me in.”

She smiled, her eyes watery. “That makes two of us,” she whispered, leaning down to kiss him.

—-

Emily stretched and—rolled off the couch. Several moments she later, she sat up, cursing. “This is ridiculous.” She looked up at Nikolas who was still sleeping peacefully. “Get up.”

Nikolas groaned. “No.”

She poked him. “Up, Cassadine.”

He sleepily opened one eye. “Whatcha doin’ down there?” he asked groggily.

She glared at him. “I fell. If I have to be awake, so do you.”

Nikolas sat up. “I need some coffee.”

Emily stood. “I’m going to see if Beth came home. Make some coffee.”

Nikolas stood and headed for the kitchen. “I’m only doing what you told me to because I want coffee.”

“Yeah, you keep believing that,” Emily called, smirking. She knocked on Elizabeth’s door. “Beth? Beth?” She frowned and slid it open. Her eyebrows nearly shot through the roof as she saw Elizabeth’s lavender dress thrown carelessly over bottom of the iron bed frame. Her jewelry—which Emily knew was expensive—was haphazardly decorating her nightstand. One of Elizabeth’s dresser drawers was left open and it was out so far it had tilted and hit the ground.

Emily surveyed the scene and decided that Elizabeth had had to somewhere in a hurry—and where ever it was, it kept her from the Deception party. But it kept Sonny and Jason, too.

“Oh, God,” she whispered. She spun around and darted down the hall. Not caring that she was only dressed in Nikolas’s dress shirt or that her makeup was probably all over her face, she ran straight into the hall and headed for the elevators.

—-

At the same time, Carly shot up and groaned. “Oh, no.”

Sonny sat up in bed and stared at her. “What?”

“I didn’t tell Emily Elizabeth was okay.” Carly threw her legs over the side of the bed and grabbed her robe. “She’s going to be so worried. She’s gonna hurt me and so is Elizabeth.”

She hurriedly tied the robe and left the room.

Sonny slumped back into bed. Carly was a hurricane sometimes—you weren’t sure quite when it would hit and sometimes it would be nice and calm and you’d think you were in the clear—but when it came down to it, when a hurricane got going…you got out of its way.

—-

Carly made it to the elevator just as Emily dashed out it. “Whoa!” she said, as Emily crashed into her.

“Carly!” Emily focused. “Beth–Jason—”

“They’re fine,” Carly said. “Sonny called from the warehouse—I was supposed to tell you last night, but you and Nikolas left before I could find you and then I tried to call you—but Sonny came home and I was so glad to see him, we went upstairs—” Carly broke off. “I am so sorry!”

Emily took a deep breath. “Everyone’s okay.”

Carly nodded. “From what Sonny tells me, definitely.” She grinned. “They went to Jason’s to finish a conversation.”

“A conversation?” Emily’s face lit up. “Do you think…?”

Carly shrugged. “I don’t know. Let’s not get our hopes up.” She grinned. “Now, from the looks of you, you got yourself a fine young man down stairs.”

Emily looked down at the messily buttoned shirt and flushed. “He’s making coffee. I’d better go.”

“I’m glad I caught you before you went to the penthouse,” Carly said. “Don’t tell Liz I didn’t tell you.” She grimaced. “She’ll hurt me.”

Emily made a motion as if she was zipping her lips shut. “My lips are sealed.” She pushed the button for the elevator. “See ya.”

—-

Carly reentered the apartment, whistling. Sonny was making his way down the steps. “I take it everything’s fine.”

“Everything’s great,” Carly said happily. “Jason and Liz finished a conversation last night and she’s still not home. I caught Emily before she went to the penthouse and I’m also starving, so get cooking.”

Sonny just laughed and headed for the kitchen.

—-

Hours passed as Emily waited impatiently for Elizabeth to get home. After eating breakfast with Nikolas, she’d kicked him out and gotten showered. She was going to sit Elizabeth down and demanded to know everything that was going on. She even had a list of questions. Did she work for Sonny? And Emily meant work in the most liberal of terms. What conversation was Carly talking about? Were she and Jason together? Was Elizabeth in love with Jason? Had they done the nasty?

Emily sat on the couch, legs and arms crossed. She stared at the door, willing to open. By now she was used to Elizabeth not being here when she woke up—she’d spent a good many nights at Jason’s. But until now Emily had assumed they were strictly platonic—hadn’t wanted to think anything else. She was afraid she’d get her hopes up.

AJ had called after she’d sent Nikolas home. He’d cleared his schedule and was returning in a week. She desperately wanted some good news for him. Emily knew that his conversation with Elizabeth had helped to clear up quite a bit of guilt for him—but AJ would never forgive himself until he saw Jason happy. And Emily wanted Jason happy as well.

It was early afternoon when the door finally opened. Elizabeth entered, wearing a black tank top and black jeans. Her hair was messy, but her face was clean—of any makeup, Emily noted. She must have had time to wash her face. She looked tired—but…she looked…peaceful.

Emily shot to her feet. “You did it.”

Elizabeth closed the door behind her. “What?”

“You’re happy. You and Jason slept together!” Emily squealed.

“We always sleep together,” Elizabeth replied amused. She dropped her keys on the table. “I am so tired.”

“Tired…” Emily trailed off grinning. “You and my brother did the nasty, didn’t you?”

“Em-”

Emily’s smile fell from her face. “Elizabeth Imogene Webber. Sit,” she commanded pointing to the couch.

“You okay?” Elizabeth eyed her. “You’re not sick right?”

“You, my friend, are going to answer some questions for me. So sit.”

Elizabeth shrugged and sat. “Shoot.”

“We’ll start with the easy questions,” Emily said. She stood directly in front of her friend and crossed her arms. “What happened with you and Jason?”

Elizabeth smiled happily. “I love him.”

Emily blinked. “What?” She uncrossed her arms and sat next to her. “You love him? Did you tell him?”

“Yeah. This morning. I thought he was asleep so I let it slip.” Elizabeth sighed. “And he said he loved me, too.”

Emily considered jumping up and down in excitement. She considered calling Carly. She considered making the trek to New York just to high-five AJ. But she was twenty-one years old. She was a mature woman with manners and decorum.

She settled for squealing and hugging her friend for about five minutes. When she pulled away, “Anything else?”

“Emily, I’m not going to tell you everything about my relationship with your brother,” Elizabeth said exasperated. “He’s your brother.”

“Well, yes, and I’ll admit, hearing details might be painful.” Emily grinned. “But I’ll get used to it. Spill.”

Elizabeth bit her lip. “Em-”

“Did you do the nasty?” Emily demanded.

Elizabeth started laughing. “The nasty?” she echoed. “Do I want to know?”

Emily glared at her. “Don’t avoid the question.”

Elizabeth shook her head, amused. “Oh, Em.”

“Do not ‘Oh, Em’ me,” Emily said. “I’m your best friend. I told you when I made love with Nikolas.”

Elizabeth sighed. “You’re right—you did. And you deserve the same courtesy.” She took a deep breath. “Did you feel like…you finally got something right? Like it was the most natural thing in the world?”

Emily’s eyes softened. “Yeah. Being with Nikolas…being each other’s firsts…god, Beth, it felt incredible—like everything in my life had been leading up to that moment.”

“I know Jason’s been with other women,” Elizabeth said, her face flushed, “but you know I’ve never slept with anyone. He was so good to me, Em.”

Emily smiled. “I guess it wasn’t that bad.”

“That bad?” Elizabeth asked. Her jaw dropped. “My god, Em, I know he’s your brother but have you ever stopped to think that he’s the most gorgeous man on Earth?”

“Well…no,” Emily wrinkled her nose. “But he’s not bad.”

“It was incredible,” Elizabeth said. “He made me feel like the only woman on the planet—like there was no one else in the world but the two of us.”

Emily sighed happily. “Good. That’s exactly how you should feel when you’re with the man you love.” Her face sobered. “Do you think he’s it?”

Elizabeth hesitated. “Well…” she looked away. “Yeah.”

Emily frowned. “You don’t sound happy about the idea.”

Elizabeth turned back. “Well…what if he doesn’t feel that way? I mean, yeah, he said he loves me. But love doesn’t last forever—not for everyone.”

“Beth, when my brother loves…he loves with everything in him,” Emily said quietly. “There’s no way this is a temporary thing. You should see the way his face lights up when you enter a room. I don’t even know if he’s realized it, but he’s so happy when you’re around.”

Elizabeth gave a little smile. “Really?”

“Yeah,” Emily nodded. “And you know what? You’re the same way. You guys have something—something Carly and I saw before the truce. We both see something and we’ve never been wrong. Grandmother thinks you’re perfect for Jason and she got AJ and Court together.”

Elizabeth grinned. “I’ve got Lila’s approval? I’ve got nothing to lose.”

Emily nodded, knowingly. “She told me herself she saw it. Anyway, you’ve answered all questions except the last one.” She frowned. “Do you work for Sonny?”

Elizabeth tensed. “I do some research sometimes.”

Emily shook her head. “I’m not stupid, Beth. I know you have a gun. You didn’t show up at the party because something was happening—Jason and Sonny weren’t there either. And you’re almost always at the warehouse. You can trust me—I won’t tell a soul, honest.”

Elizabeth hesitated. “You promise you won’t get mad?” she asked.

Emily nodded. “Promise.”

“Okay.” Elizabeth took a deep breath. “I’m an equal silent partner in all of Sonny’s businesses. The hotel, the coffee warehouse…and the other thing.”

Emily’s eyes widened. “Equal partner?” she asked, in a hushed tone. “My god. You, Sonny and Jason are equal partners.”

Elizabeth nodded solemnly. “And after graduation in two years, Sonny’s going to make the official announcement.”

Emily sat back and blinked. “I didn’t quite expect this,” she said.

Elizabeth sighed. “You’re mad.”

“No. Just surprised.” Emily frowned. “You can’t tell me what happened last night can you?”

Elizabeth shook her head. “No.”

“I figured. Carly know?”

“No. Just me, Sonny, Jason and you. The men don’t even know.”

Emily clasped her hands together and studied her nails, “All right.”
“You’re okay with that?”

Emily sighed. “It’s your life, Beth. You make your own decisions—no one can tell you what to do.”

Elizabeth nodded. “Taking the classes…in self-defense, it’s helped, Em. I’ll never have to worry about my father again.”

Emily glanced sharply. “That’s why you’re doing this.”

“What?” Elizabeth asked, taken aback.

“You’re involved because you want to make sure Jeff Webber will never cross you again. So you’ll never have to be afraid.”

Elizabeth looked away. “I just hated feeling helpless.”

Emily sighed. “Well, now I really have to accept this because I don’t blame you. I even understand.”

“Really?” Elizabeth asked, hopefully.

“Yeah. Just…promise me you’ll take care of yourself,” Emily said.

Elizabeth nodded. “Not a problem.”

This entry is part 18 of 29 in the Surviving the Past

The safe house was on the outskirts of Port Charles. It was a one story, three bedroom house that Sonny normally used for injured men.

“What’s Chosky’s ETA?” Sonny asked as he, Jason and Elizabeth walked up to the house.

“An hour and a half,” Elizabeth replied. She smirked. “Think we can occupy him for that long?”

“We’ll think of something,” Sonny replied. He pulled the door open and let Elizabeth enter first. “Stay in the living room, Liz.”

Elizabeth glared at him. “I’m one of the people responsible for bringing him in,” she said tightly. “I think I have the right to be back there.”

Sonny looked at Jason, who held his hands up in mock surrender. “Don’t look at me to back you up. I already tried to tell her what to do tonight and you can see how well that turned out.”

Sonny glared at him. “Wussy.” He turned his attention back to Elizabeth. “Fine. Let’s go.”

—-

Verruchio was in the second bedroom, handcuffed and tied to a chair. He was gagged and blind folded. Johnny and Francis were standing guard.

Jason and Elizabeth entered first, followed by Sonny. Elizabeth walked over to a table and pulled herself onto it. Jason stood next to her and leaned against the table.

Sonny closed the door and flipped the lights on. He nodded to Johnny who removed the blindfold and gag.

“Hello,” Sonny said. “We haven’t been properly introduced. I’m Sonny Corinthos.” He nodded his head in Elizabeth and Jason’s direction. “I think you already know my sister Elizabeth and my partner, Jason.”

Verruchio threw a hateful glance at Elizabeth. “Little bitch,” he muttered.

Elizabeth giggled which made all the men in the room throw her a strange look. “That’s pathetic,” she remarked, amused. “Little bitch?” she repeated. “That’s the best you can do?’

“Elizabeth,” Sonny warned.

“Oh, Sonny, he’s just mad because a woman showed him up,” Elizabeth said.

“I know where I made my mistake,” Verruchio remarked coldly. “It was taking Morgan instead of her. She’s obviously the Achilles’ heel.” He let his eyes drift up and down her body. “Probably could have had some more fun with her.”

Jason’s body tensed and he appeared ready to move, but Sonny got there first. He backhanded the man. “Never refer to my sister again.”

A cold smile spread on Verruchio’s thin lips. “She must be a tomcat in the sack, eh, Morgan?”

This time Jason did take a step forward, but Elizabeth jumped down from her position first. She stood next to Sonny and crossed her arms. “You’ll never know,” she replied, sweetly.

“Elizabeth,” Sonny repeated in the same tone.

“You think I don’t have ways to ensure you learn a lesson little girl?” Verruchio snapped. “You think my men wouldn’t be glad to-”

Elizabeth cut him off with short jab to the nose. When Verruchio’s head came forward again, she grabbed his chin with her hand and leaned in close, glaring at him. “No man lays a hand on me unless I say so,” she hissed. “Do you got that?” When he didn’t say anything, she let go abruptly and stepped back. She looked at her brother. “I’ll go wait in the living room,” she said. She threw another glare towards Verruchio and slammed the door behind her.

Sonny returned his attention to the man tied to the chair. “Consider yourself lucky we promised Chosky we’d wait until he arrived.” He looked at Jason. “Go check on her.”

—-

Elizabeth wasn’t in the living room—she was sitting on a chair on the porch staring at the surrounding woods. Jason opened the creaking screen door and stepped onto the porch.

“I’m fine,” Elizabeth said immediately. “I was just worried I might hurt him if I stayed in that room any longer.”

Jason leaned against the porch railing. “You did a good job tonight,” he said. She looked at him. “As much as I hate admit it…you’re good at this.”

Elizabeth smiled. “Yes. I am.”

“How’d you know where to find me?” he asked curiously.

Instead of answering, Elizabeth stood and leaned over the railing, clasping her hands. She took a deep breath. “Don’t you love the smell of the woods?” she asked. “I think the scent of the outdoors is the only thing I miss about living at the Webber Estate.”

“Elizabeth.”

She sighed. “I called Chosky. He said Verruchio keeps to the abandoned warehouses along the docks. We got men together, split the warehouses and started the search.”

“And you just happened to be in the group that found me?” Jason asked.

She smiled. “I made sure I searched the most likely warehouse. The most abandoned and remote one. I was right.”

He slowly exhaled. “I don’t like that you put yourself in that kind of danger.”

“Too bad,” Elizabeth replied.

“I don’t like it,” Jason continued as if she hadn’t spoken, “but I’m not going to say another word about it. It’s your life—and you’re right. I’d be the first person out the door to look for you.”

Elizabeth straightened and smiled at him. “Good. I’m glad you came to your senses.”

“So, what did you want to talk about?” Jason asked. “We have time before we have to do anything.”

She bit her lip and looked back out at the surrounding scenery. “I love the way the stars look in open spaces,” Elizabeth said quietly. “I think I want to live out here someday.” She leaned against one of the pillars that reached to the top of the porch. “You scared me tonight.”

“I’m sorry,” Jason said quietly. He tried to read her expression—but all he could see was her profile.

“I did exactly what I swore I wouldn’t let myself do,” Elizabeth continued. “I let you become the most important person in my life again. And when I was faced the idea that I’d lose you, I realized that I didn’t care.”

“Didn’t care?” Jason repeated. “Wait.”

“I mean it didn’t bother me anymore,” Elizabeth clarified. “I was comfortable with you being that important.” She glanced at him. “Are you okay with that?”

“Yeah,” Jason said. “Yeah, I’m okay with that.”

She smiled. “Good.”

“Is there anything else?” he asked.

Elizabeth hesitated. “Actually-” She stopped as a black car pulled up. She frowned and checked her watch. “He’s early.”

Jason sighed, frustrated. He’d made her finish that statement later. “Probably anxious to be done with this.”

A driver emerged from the front seat and headed to the backseat to open the door. A young man emerged followed by an older, silver-haired man.

“Who’s the younger guy?” Jason asked.

“His son, Michael, probably,” Elizabeth replied. She smirked. “As soon as Chosky found out I was Sonny’s sister, he flew up and tried to arrange a marriage between us. Tried to link the territories, I guess.” She shook her head. “Sonny said it was up to me.”

“What did you do?” Jason asked curiously.

“Went on a few dates,” Elizabeth replied. She came forward. “Albert, Michael, so good to see you!” She gave Chosky a kiss on the cheek and shook Michael’s hand.

“Ah, Elizabeth, you’re looking as lovely as ever,” Chosky remarked. He grinned, his green eyes sparkled. “Have you given my offer any more thought?”

Elizabeth shook her head. “No. My answer is the same.” She turned to Jason. “Albert, this is Sonny’s new partner, Jason Morgan. Jason, this is Albert Chosky and his oldest son, Michael.”

Jason put his hand out. “Hello.”

Chosky shook it. “Good to meet you, Mr. Morgan.”

Michael Chosky was probably around AJ’s age, maybe older. He had dark brown hair and green eyes like his father. He was a little shorter than Jason, but just as built. He stuck his hand out. “Hello.”

Jason shook his hand. “Hello.”

Michael turned to Elizabeth. “Lizzie, it’s been too long.” He reached out and pulled her into a hug. Elizabeth politely hugged him and pulled away quickly.

“Yeah, well, I suppose you want to get in,” Elizabeth said. “Jason and I will show you the room.”

Elizabeth opened the screen door and let Michael and Chosky pass before her. She followed them in.

And Jason stood on the porch, wondering what the hell Michael and Elizabeth had done on those few dates.

—-

Within an hour, Frank Verruchio had been dealt with. The warehouse had been cleared, and Michael and Chosky had left for a hotel. Johnny and Francis had taken care of the safe house.

And Sonny, Jason and Elizabeth returned to the Harborview Towers.

“I should check in with Emily,” Elizabeth said as they headed to the elevators. “She and Nik were expecting us to be right behind them.”

Sonny pushed the button. “I called Carly and told her that there was a situation at the warehouse that you and Jason had to take care of. I made sure to tell her to tell Emily.”

“Thanks,” Elizabeth said gratefully. She looked at Jason. “Maybe we could finish that conversation.”

Sonny eyed them curiously. Conversation? Sounded like something Carly would be interested in.

“Sure.” Jason looked at Sonny. “You need me for anything?”

“No. Go. It’s late,” Sonny replied.

—-

Jason closed the penthouse door behind him. “So, you and Chosky’s kid.”

Elizabeth looked at him amused. She leaned against the desk. “Yeah?”

“What happened after those dates?” he said, bluntly.

She grinned. “Why? You jealous?”

“No,” Jason said shortly.

She shook her head. “Nothing. I decided he wasn’t my type.”

“Okay,” Jason replied, feeling relieved.

She started to laugh. “I can’t believe you were jealous.” Elizabeth moved away from the desk and sat on the couch.

“I was not jealous,” Jason said, crossing his arms. “I was curious.”

“Oh, okay,” Elizabeth replied, shaking her head.

“So what did you want to talk about?” Jason asked, changing the subject.

Elizabeth leaned back on the couch and closed her eyes. “I think we’ve gotten to know each other pretty well these last few weeks.”

“Yeah.”

“I just wanted some clarification,” she said turning her head to face him. He sat down next to her.

“Clarification,” he echoed.

“Yeah.” Elizabeth sat up and curled her legs underneath her. “What are we?”

“What do you mean?” he asked.

“Well, are we friends…are we more…are we less…” Elizabeth trailed off.

“We’re more than friends. I thought we agreed on that,” Jason replied.

“Yeah, I know,” Elizabeth said, wrinkling her nose. “But what does that mean?”

Jason stared at her. “What do you want to mean?”

“You’re not making this very easy on me,” Elizabeth said, frustrated. “Okay, we agreed we shouldn’t rush things.”

“Yeah.”

She glared at him. “You wanna jump in here any time and let me know if that’s changed or are you gonna let me babble?”

“Let you babble.”

Elizabeth punched him in the arm. “I’m suddenly beginning to remember why we fought in the first place,” she muttered.

“Elizabeth.”

“What?” she grumbled. She crossed her arms and pointedly didn’t look at him.

“I told you I was going to be around—that we didn’t need to jump into anything. Because you have a lot going on.”

“Yes. Well, now I don’t,” Elizabeth replied. “Verruchio is gone…the nightmares are fading again, I’m okay with the novel rejections. So…”

“The nightmares are fading,” Jason agreed. “But what about Jeff coming back?”

Elizabeth frowned. “I could let that bother me. And to tell the truth, I probably will when it happens. But we haven’t heard anything about it actually happening, so why I should I live my life in fear of something that might happen?” She picked at her nails. “I’ve lived in fear too long and tonight, if nothing else, showed me that I can take care of myself now. I’m not a scared little girl with no one to turn to. If he comes near me, I can back myself up. And I have people who know…who care. It’s not like before.” She looked at him. “If you don’t want to be with me, you can just say so.”

“That’s not it,” Jason said. He tucked her hair behind her ear. “I just want to be sure this is what you want.”

Elizabeth met his eyes. “This is what I want,” she said, firmly. “I want to be with you. I’m at a point in my life where I think I can handle it.”

“You think,” Jason repeated.

The corners of her mouth upturned into a smirk. “The question is…can you handle it?”

He grinned and leaned in to kiss her. She deepened the kiss almost immediately and it became intense in matter of seconds. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him close. He gripped her hips with his hands and pulled her into his lap.

After a few minutes, Elizabeth pulled away and smiled. “Hmm…I could get used to that.”

Jason looked at her. “Yeah, me too.”

She leaned her forehead against his. “Take me upstairs,” she whispered.

His eyes widened with surprise. “You sure?” he asked.

“Mmmm-hmmm…” Elizabeth murmured, kissing him again. “I want to be with you,” she said. “Make love to me, Jason,” she whispered.

“Well, since you ask so nicely.”

This entry is part 17 of 29 in the Surviving the Past

The next week and a half was relatively quiet—on all fronts. Elizabeth didn’t have any nightmares that woke up her in the night—but it didn’t stop her from spending a few nights with Jason. She and Jason spent virtually all their time together, growing closer.

AJ and the family returned to New York after a week. There was a crisis at the ELQ office he couldn’t ignore. They had another reunion dinner before going, but this one was more somber. They all knew the truth by that point and it was on their minds throughout the dinner. AJ promised to come for another visit in a few weeks as soon as things settled down and this time…he, Jason and Emily would pay a visit to the Quartermaine mansion. Dealing with one’s past didn’t seem to be limited to Elizabeth anymore.

Things were quiet on the territory front. A few dealers, a few prostitutes, all of which Sonny and Jason took care of while Elizabeth worked on tracking Verruchio’s movements. That, along with helping Carly plan the next Deception launch party was proving enough to exhaust Elizabeth into getting more sleep.

Elizabeth had asked Edward if he’d heard anything about the Webbers returning from Europe. Edward didn’t ask why, but he told her he hadn’t heard a thing. He told her he’d keep his ears open and let her know. Elizabeth wasn’t sure what she’d do if Jeff was returning to Port Charles, but she wanted to be prepared. Somehow, being blindsided by the news when he was already there didn’t sound conducive to keeping the nightmares at bay.

The night of the Deception launch party was upon them, and Emily and Elizabeth spent a few hours getting ready. Emily was going with Nikolas, Elizabeth with Jason. Emily was thrilled about going because Luke and Lucky Spencer had returned from their latest mission and were going to be there to support Laura. It’d been more than a year since she’d seen them. Elizabeth wasn’t as thrilled, she adored Luke but the incident when she was ten still hung in her mind where Lucky was concerned. Emily had convinced her to try and make a fresh start with him.

“Have you seen my emerald earrings, Beth?” Emily called from the entry way as she studied her reflection in the mirror. She smoothed the silk strapless emerald green dress over her hips.

“Didn’t you let Carly borrow them?” Elizabeth asked, emerging from the bathroom. She finished putting in her amethyst earrings. “She’s at the party by now.”

Emily wrinkled her nose. “Do you still have the emerald set you got from Lila?” she asked.

Elizabeth nodded, “Yeah. It’s in my room. I’ll get it.” Elizabeth disappeared back down the hall and reemerged a few minutes later with a velvet box. “Here.”

“Thanks.” Emily turned to look at her friend. “I was right—that dress looks great.”

Elizabeth looked down at the lavender velvet dress she wore. It was sleeveless with a high collar and low back. It clung tightly to her upper body, but was loose around her legs. “It’s not bad.”

Emily smirked as she fastened the emerald necklace around her neck and put the one she’d been wearing back in her own box. “Jason’s gonna forget his name.”

Elizabeth shrugged and worked on fastening a bracelet. “Jason isn’t interested in material things.”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t appreciate them,” Emily teased. She watched Elizabeth struggle to clasp the bracelet. “Here, let me.”

Elizabeth held her wrist out and Emily clipped it shut quickly. “You look amazing. Nikolas will probably spend a few minutes drooling at the door.”

Emily met her eyes, the green eye shadow making her blue-green eyes look a deeper shade of green. “I’m counting on it.” She grinned.

Elizabeth laughed. She checked the clock on the VCR. “They’ll be here any minute. I’m going to get my purse.”

There was a knock at the door then and Emily leaned over to open it. “Hey, Nikolas.”

Nikolas stared at her for a beat or two. “Oh, hi,” he said finally. “You look…incredible.”

Emily grinned. “Quite a difference from sweats huh?” she asked, wrapping her arms around his neck. She gave him a light kiss. “You’re looking pretty good yourself,” she said, pulling away to drink in the sight of him in a tux. He almost never wore them—except at weddings or family events.

Nikolas grinned. “I clean up well.” He looked around. “Where’s Liz?”

“Right here,” Elizabeth said, appearing again. She was transferring her wallet, lipstick, keys and gum from her standard cloth purse to the lavender evening bag. “You look nice.”

“You’re beautiful as always,” Nikolas said. “Where’s Jason?”

Elizabeth flicked her eyes to the clock. “He’ll be here any minute. You guys go ahead without me. Jason’s never late and he only lives two floors up anyway.”

“All right.” Emily grabbed a purse and blew a kiss. “See ya there, Beth.” She and Nikolas left, the door closing behind them. Elizabeth gave her makeup and hair one last check at the mirror and looked at the clock again. Jason was supposed to pick her up at seven. It was a few minutes after seven. She frowned. Jason was usually early if not on time.

She started pacing. So what if he’s late? Maybe the elevator is out of order, or maybe his zipper got stuck. It’s only a few minutes. He’s not perfect after all. Elizabeth decided not to worry until 7:20.

Which came and went with no Jason. Elizabeth couldn’t hide the sinking feeling in her stomach anymore. Something was very wrong—Jason wouldn’t just stand her up. She’d accepted that he wasn’t leaving town. So where was he?

She sat on the couch and stared at the clock ticked the minutes. At 7:45, she stood up and headed for the phone. She dialed Jason’s number quickly. His voicemail came on and Elizabeth slammed the phone down. No good. His phone wasn’t even turned on—something else that never happened around Jason. She started cracking her knuckles, worried. Some was now incredibly wrong.

Just as the clock reached 8:00, the phone rang. Elizabeth practically leapt towards the phone and snatched it up. “Jason?” she demanded.

“Liz, it’s Sonny. Get to the warehouse now.”

Elizabeth closed her eyes and tried to ignore the tears. “Where’s Jason? Is he okay? Damn it, Sonny, tell me!”

There was a pause on his end. “Come dressed sensibly. Something’s up and you can’t be wearing an evening gown.”

“I’ll be right there,” Elizabeth replied. She put the phone down and headed for her room, practically ripping the jewelry from her body.

Please let Jason be okay. Please.

—-

Elizabeth arrived at the warehouse fifteen minutes later. The lavender dress and amethyst jewelry replaced by black jeans and a black tank top. She hadn’t wasted any time by pulling her hair out of the French twist, and she stopped only long enough to grab her handgun and load it.

By the time she had arrived, she’d gotten her emotions under control. Whatever was happening wouldn’t be helped by her tears. She was calm and in control. And hoping like hell that both Jason and Sonny would be waiting on the other side of the door.

She closed her eyes and said one last silent prayer—and opened the door.

Sonny was standing at the window that faced the water. He turned when he saw her. Her eyes darted around the room—it was empty. “Where is he?” she demanded.

“You were right,” Sonny said quietly. “It’s Verruchio behind it all.”

Her blood ran cold. “Oh my God, he’s dead isn’t he?” She wanted to scream, cry—rage at the world, but she had to remain calm.

“Not yet.” Sonny reached onto his desk and pressed play on a tape recorder.

“Mr. Corinthos, I’m sorry we couldn’t meet under more pleasant circumstances. We haven’t been introduced—I am Frank Verruchio and I have someone you’d like back. Mr. Morgan was a rather difficult man to capture, but my men are resourceful. If you haven’t him in twenty-four hours, I suggest you stop looking.”

“When was the message left?” Elizabeth asked immediately.

“An hour and a half ago,” Sonny said. “I’ve got men combing the town—no one’s heard anything and no one’s talking.”

Elizabeth snatched the phone up and started dialing.

“Who are you calling?” Sonny asked.

“Albert Chosky. Verruchio was his right hand man and probably did a few kidnappings for him. If Verruchio has a pattern, he’ll know it.”

Sonny stared at his sister as she got in quick contact with South Floridian crime boss. He was more grateful than ever that he’d taken her into the business. She had a quick mind that came up with solution that he never would have thought of it.

“Uh, huh,” Elizabeth murmured. She grabbed a pen and a pad of paper and began jotting things down. “Docks, warehouses, silencers, uh huh…okay…three guards…sure thing, I’m sure my brother won’t have a problem. Okay, thanks. Bye.” She hung the phone up. “I was right. Verruchio did seven kidnappings for Chosky—all of them the same way. He was never caught by anyone so Chosky figures he’ll stick to the same pattern.” She headed for her computer and flicked the switch. “He always sticks to abandoned warehouses on the docks. He uses seven men. Three to guard the hostage and the other four to patrol. Verruchio never leaves the hostage alone.”

Sonny nodded. “I’ll call every man in. You getting a list of warehouses?”

Elizabeth’s hands flew over the keyboard. “It’ll be ready by the time they get here.” She glanced at him. “Chosky recommends every gun have a silencer. He also gave his recommendation. Separate into groups of three and split the warehouses among the men. The work will get done more quickly.”

Sonny began dialing. “Max, it’s me. Every man must be at the warehouse in ten minutes. We’ve got a lead and we need everyone.” He hung up. “Liz, you did some good thinking. I wouldn’t have thought of calling him right away.”

Elizabeth clicked print and turned to him. “I told you I’d be invaluable.” She stood and went to the printer in the middle of the room, waiting for the pages to feed out. “I have eighteen warehouses. We’ll need fifty-three men.”

“Fifty four,” Sonny corrected. “Eighteen groups of three is fifty-four.”

Elizabeth grabbed the lists that came out. “No. Fifty-three.” Her eyes flashed. “I’m going.”

“Like hell you are,” Sonny replied. “I’m not putting you in danger.”

She slapped the papers on his desk and glared at him. “You don’t get to make that choice. That is not just a partner he has. That’s Jason. That makes it different. I am not going to lose him. And I will not sit in this office waiting for him. I am not some helpless female. I am going and you are not stopping me.”

“You’re too emotionally involved,” Sonny snapped. “You’re in love with him and you’ll make mistakes.”

“Don’t you understand?” Elizabeth cried. “I won’t make mistakes. I won’t fail. I can’t. This is too important.” She took a deep breath. “If it were Carly, what would you do?”

“Elizabeth-” Sonny stopped. “I want to make this clear. I am not happy with this decision.”

“You’d let Jason search for me wouldn’t you?” Elizabeth demanded. “Then give me that same consideration.”

“Okay.” Sonny ran his hand through his hair. “Get these lists separated. You’re going with Francis and Johnny. They’re the best.”

Elizabeth nodded and immediately set to work.

—-

Eleven minutes later, the main room of the warehouse was filled with Sonny’s men. Elizabeth set to work quickly and divided them into eighteen groups. She gave a list to one person in every group.

When she was finished, she went to stand in her group. If Johnny and Francis or any of the other men were surprised to see the boss’s sister included, it didn’t show.

“Your orders are to search the address you’ve been given. Search it thoroughly—do not call in unless you are positive Verruchio or Morgan aren’t there,” Sonny directed. “Once you’ve been called in, you will be sent to a different warehouse.” He paused for a few seconds letting his eyes flick around the group. “If they are there, call me immediately. I will spread word to the other groups. Go in and secure the location—do not wait for the other men to arrive. I want Morgan back here as soon as possible.” He let his eyes rest on Elizabeth. Her facial expression was blank—her stance tense. He was still having reservations about sending her, but he couldn’t inflict a double standard on her. He would let Jason search for Elizabeth. “I want Verruchio alive if possible. I have a man from Florida who’s flying up personally to witness his demise. You will face seven guards if you get that warehouse. Three guarding Jason and four patrolling.” Sonny paused again. “I don’t think I need to stress how important it is that Jason comes back here alive. Go. We have less than twenty-two hours.”

—-

Elizabeth, Johnny and Francis got into the unmarked black car and began driving the fifteen necessary minutes to their assigned warehouse. Elizabeth sat in the back and stared out the window. She was trying to remain calm—but the prospect of losing Jason for good was terrifying.

“You okay, Ms. Webber?” Francis said, glancing over his shoulder.

Elizabeth didn’t even glance away from the window. “It’s Elizabeth, Francis. And I’m fine.”

—-

The car pulled up a hundred feet from the warehouse. Elizabeth got out of the back of the car and immediately felt her lower back to make sure her gun was still tucked in. She joined Johnny and Francis who were assessing the location.

“It’s remote,” Johnny said. “It’s the last warehouse within miles on the docks.”

Francis nodded. “Definitely the most likely.”

“Which is why I assigned it to us,” Elizabeth said quietly. She felt their eyes on her but she kept staring at the building. “I knew that it had the best chance.”

Francis and Johnny traded looks but didn’t say anything. Elizabeth finally glanced up. “Let’s circle the perimeter,” she suggested.

“Right,” Francis said. He decided not to comment on the fact that Elizabeth seemed to know exactly what she was doing. Pretty strange behavior for the boss’s sister.

—-

They were coming around the last side of the building when they heard voices. The three of them snapped to the wall and leaned in close.
Elizabeth’s heart was racing. Jason was here! She reached behind her and pulled her handgun out. Attached to the top was a silencer. Johnny and Francis pulled their own guns out.

“I’ll look and see what’s there,” Francis breathed. He moved a few centimeters and leaned his head slightly around the corner. “Two.”

Johnny nodded and looked to Elizabeth. “Me and Francis will get them. Stay here.”

Elizabeth nodded and watched as Johnny and Francis made their quick movements. It went fast. They jumped out, each shot once and moved right back, not even waiting to see if they’d hit. After a moment, Francis leaned around again and breathed a sigh of relief. “They’re down.”

They continued around the corner to reach the fallen guards. Johnny kneeled down next to them. “They’re dead,” he said simply. “That leaves two patrolling.” He straightened. “Liz, you and Francis go look for Jason. I got the other two.”

“You sure?” Francis said. Johnny nodded.

“Let’s make this quick. Liz, call Sonny.”

Elizabeth pulled the cell phone out of her back pocket and dialed her brother’s number. A few short words and she slipped back in her pocket. “He gave the go ahead. Let’s go.”

—-

The inside of the warehouse was divided into two floors with high ceilings. It was dark, damp and smelled like rotting fish. Elizabeth wrinkled her nose and made a silent vow to lay off seafood for a while. Johnny was going to stay down stairs while Francis and Elizabeth moved upstairs.

“If we see anyone,” Francis said as the two were inching their way up the stairs, “Shoot. Aim for the knees to knock them out. You’re good at making at the shot.”

Elizabeth gave him a humorless smile. “And you’re good at chest shots. I know.”

They reached the top of the stairs and stuck close to the wall. The hallway went into two directions. There were a few doors on either side. Elizabeth and Francis exchanged a quick glance. Without a word, they separated. Elizabeth to the left, Francis the right. Elizabeth felt the first knob turn easily. She slid the door open soundlessly. The room was empty. She crossed the hall and did the same. Another empty room. She was about to try the third door when she heard Francis.

“Liz. Here.”

She turned to see Francis motioning towards another door. He gestured for her to come closer. Elizabeth was careful to keep her footsteps light.

“Voices,” Francis mouthed. He leaned his mouth close to ear. “I’m going to kick the door open. Try to get as many down before they realize anything.”

Elizabeth took a deep breath and nodded. She moved to the side and Francis backed up. He raised his foot and with one sweeping motion, the door flew open.

Elizabeth jumped into the doorway, her gun raised. There were five occupants. Three dark-haired men, a blonde and Jason tied to a chair. She squeezed off five quick shots towards the dark-haired men before Francis came to her side. He fired three shots.

When they paused for a split second to access the situation, all three were down. Two were still moving.

The last man standing was staring at them. His expression was torn between amusement and shock. “What the hell-”

Elizabeth raised her gun and aimed it straight at his face. “Shut up and don’t move,” she hissed. She was desperate for a glance of Jason but she had to take care of Verruchio first. “Verruchio, I presume.”

Frank Verruchio stared at the small brunette. “You’re Corinthos’ sister,” he managed to say. Francis entered the room and slipped past Elizabeth to finish off the three guards.

Elizabeth smirked. “Your point?” she asked coolly. She was amazed at how easy it had been—how calm and in control she felt. She would gladly shoot him if it meant Jason would come safely.

Francis mimicked her aim. “Untie Jason,” he said. “I got him.”

Elizabeth nodded and turned her eyes to Jason.

Who was looking at her like he’d never seen her before. He was gagged, his feet tied to the bottom of the chair and his hands behind him. She avoided his eyes as she kneeled to untie his feet.

As she moved behind him, Johnny entered the room. “Calvary’s arrived,” he announced. “The other four guards are dead and a cleaning crew’s on its way.” He eyed Francis. “Sonny wants him alive, remember that.”

Elizabeth stood up as did Jason. Jason removed the gag and turned to look at her. “What the hell are you doing here?” he demanded.

Verruchio who’d barely said a word since they’d entered the room. “That’s what I’d like to know.”

“Shut up,” Francis ordered. He turned to Johnny. “Let’s take him to the safe house. Call some reinforcements.”

Elizabeth decided she didn’t want to answer Jason’s questions turned to Verruchio instead. “You know, for someone who was trying to take over Sonny’s territory, you’re awfully stupid. Seven men?”

He glared at her. “It’s always worked before,” he bit out.

Elizabeth smiled. “I know. That’s why I’m glad Albert told me. Such a wonderful man—more than eager to help. He told us all about your little habits.” She crossed her arms. “He’ll be meeting you at the house.”

Verruchio’s eyes went black. “He’s coming here?”

“Yep,” Francis said. Johnny reentered the room with three other men. The men grabbed Verruchio and hauled him out of the room, Francis and Johnny following with their guns trained on him.

Once they were gone, Elizabeth’s shoulders slumped. “That’s an evening I’d rather not repeat,” she said, dryly.

“And you’re not,” Jason said, his voice hard. “What the hell were you thinking? You could have been killed?”

She turned amazed eyes on him. “Are you insane?” she said. She shook her head. “No. We are not having this conversation here. Let’s go to the warehouse, Sonny’ll want to see you.”

—-

Less than two hours after Elizabeth had left, she entered the office again. Sonny immediately pulled her into a tight embrace. “I’m glad you’re okay,” he said. He pulled away to look at Jason, “You, too.”

Jason nodded. His jaw was clenched. “What was she doing there?”

Elizabeth glared at him. “Excuse me?” she demanded. “Are we forgetting that I’m a partner here? That I get to make my own decisions? That I run my own life?”

“A silent partner,” Jason said. “You could have been killed.”

Elizabeth glared at him. Suddenly the fury that used to be present when she’d speak to Jason was back in full force. “You hypocritical jackass!” she sputtered. Sonny decided he was going to let them argue this out.

“I’m going to wait outside. When the two of you are done, we’ll go see Verruchio. Chosky will be here in a few hours.” He exited the office.

Jason ignored him. “What in the hell are you talking about?”

“If I were being held hostage, who’d be the first person trying to find me?” Elizabeth demanded, her eyes flashing.

Jason didn’t back down. “This is different-”

“The hell it is,” Elizabeth snapped. “Why? Because I’m not a man? Because I don’t have a dick I’m suddenly incapable of taking a gun and shooting someone? You know what, you son of a bitch, you’ve been gone for a long time. Just because you’ve been back less than a month, it does not mean you know everything about me!” She took a deep breath. “Ask any one of the guys I trained with. I am the third best shot, right under Francis and Zander. I know how to take care of myself. Just because I have trouble sleeping and I have nightmares, that does not remove my ability to take care of myself!”

Jason stopped. What the hell was he doing? “You’re right,” he finally.

Elizabeth stared at him. “What?”

“You’re right. I’m being a hypocrite.”

She blinked. “That was too easy.”

Jason took a deep breath and met her eyes. “When that door kicked open and I saw you—I…it hit me.”

“What hit you?” she asked, a little worried about the direction this conversation was taking. She licked her lips nervously.

His hand drifted up to her face. “How much I didn’t want to lose you.”

“I hate when you do that,” she muttered.

“What?”

“I was really pissed at you,” Elizabeth said, “and now I’m not. I wanted to be pissed for a while.”

He smirked. “Sorry. Next time I’m an ass, I promise I’ll try to let you stay mad.”

“Good,” Elizabeth replied. She looked away. “Listen, I think we need to talk. There are some things I need to tell you.” She sighed. “But it’ll have to wait. We’d better go meet Sonny.”