This is a song for the broken girl
The one pushed aside by the cold, cold world
You are
Hear me when I say
You’re not the worthless they made you feel
There is a love they can never steal away
You don’t have to stay the broken girl
– Broken Girl, Matthew West

---

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Hardy Home: Living Room

Elizabeth was crying again as she finished telling her grandmother about Friday, about the final time Lucky had hurt her. Audrey was in tears, too, her voice trembling as she hugged Elizabeth. The two of them rocked back and forth on the sofa.

“I’m so sorry, darling, that I didn’t see it. That I didn’t make you feel safe enough to tell me—” Audrey drew back and wiped tears from Elizabeth’s face. “I love you so very much, and all I’ve ever wanted is for you to be happy. But you haven’t been. I blamed you, and I had no right—”

“No, Gram, you did the same thing to me that I did to myself—”

“But I know better. I saw you after the kidnapping.” Audrey pressed her lips together, tried to get herself under control. “I saw the way you broke down—and I kept going. I kept blaming Jason. But it’s never been his fault. It’s mine. And Jason is right. I saw Lucky last night. I should have seen the signs.”

“I should have had more courage and faith in myself. I knew I wasn’t in love with Lucky weeks ago. I don’t know when it changed—” Elizabeth took a deep breath. “Gram, I had an affair with Jason. I knew it. I knew it was wrong, but I couldn’t stop myself. And I let my guilt over that blind me to what was happening in my marriage. I couldn’t see that Lucky’s anger was dangerous, I didn’t see that he taking drugs—and I didn’t just put myself in that situation, I let it happen to Cameron—”

“I put myself back into a marriage with a man that nearly destroyed me,” Audrey told her. “You know that. I could say times were different — and they were. The judge wouldn’t give me custody of Tommy unless I stayed with his father. And, of course, in the state of New York—” She sighed.

“A husband couldn’t rape his wife,” Elizabeth said with a sour taste in her throat. “I know. It was never that bad with Lucky, and part of me wants to say it never would have been, but I also—”

She swiped tears from her cheeks. “I never thought it would be like that with Lucky at all. I kept thinking we could have the magic back. I never once stopped to ask myself if I even wanted it.”

“I’m sorry, darling. But you’ve left him now, and I won’t ever let you change your mind.” Audrey hesitated. “And…this…affair with Jason…is it—well, is it still—”

“When I went back to Lucky, Jason and I stopped seeing each other. I promise. I ran into him last week on the docks by accident. We weren’t sleeping together. It was just…a few kisses. A few conversations we shouldn’t have had. But it was enough, and I should have listened to my heart.”

Elizabeth waited a moment, but Audrey didn’t say anything, so she continued. “But yes. Now it’s…something. I’ve told Jason that I want to take it slow. I want to end my marriage, I want to take a breath and give myself space. But I don’t want either of us to ignore how we felt. How we feel. I don’t want to miss my chance again. He loves Cameron, Gram.”

“Does he love you?” Audrey asked carefully.

“I—”

Elizabeth’s answer was cut off as there was a harsh knock on the door. Elizabeth frowned and went to the door to look through the peephole. She grimaced, stepping away. “Go away, Lucky!”

“Let me in! Now! You’re my wife, and I’ll be damned if you’re going to keep humiliating me—” Lucky hit the door, kicking it so hard that it shook in the frame.

“Lucky Spencer, you leave this property right now, or I will call the police,” Audrey shouted back.

“Open this goddamn door, Elizabeth, or I will break it down!”

Her heart pounding, Elizabeth fumbled for her phone. “I’m calling Jason—he can send a guard or—”

“I’m calling 911 right now!” Audrey shouted as she grabbed the landline. She went to the window where she could see Lucky on her doorstep. She held up the phone, so he could watch her dial. “Get off my property!”

“This isn’t over, Elizabeth!” Lucky slammed his fist against the door again but finally stalked away.

Elizabeth closed her eyes, took a deep breath. “Gram—”

“Darling—”

“Don’t call 911. Call Mac Scorpio. Robin was right. I need to report him. Because this isn’t over.”

And while Audrey was calling Mac, Elizabeth made two phone calls of her own. One to Emily, to ask her to come over, and the other to Justus to make an appointment for the next day.

She was done hiding.

Kelly’s: Diner

Jason opened the door and found his tech guy sitting with one of the guards at one of the back tables. Jason hurried over to sit by Stan. “Were you able to find it?”

“Yep.” Stan sipped his iced tea then nodded to Marco, who drew out two plastic bags of jewelry. “Everything Lucky Spencer pawned since March. I just told the owner you were an interested party, and he couldn’t give them to me fast enough.”

Jason took the bags and frowned at the first bag—a man’s wedding ring. “He pawned his wedding ring?”

Stan leaned forward. “Oh. Yeah. Guy said Lucky pawned it in March, and never reclaimed it. Came in yesterday around nine, looking all wild-eyed—typical addict crap—and pawned the rest of it.” He looked at Jason. “That’s what you wanted, right? You didn’t care about the television, right?”

“Yeah, I just wanted the jewelry.” Jason exhaled slowly, then shoved the bags into his pocket. “What do we owe the owner? Did you tell him we’d make it worth his while, or did you just threaten him?”

“Turns out your name is apparently enough to make the guy crap in his pants,” Marco said with a grin. “Probably could have cleaned him out of the diamonds if I’d been interested.”

“Thanks. Keep this to yourself, okay?”

“We’re protecting a cop?” Stan asked with some confusion. “Isn’t he Elizabeth’s husband? I mean, maybe I’m overstepping, but wouldn’t it be easier for you if he got in trouble—”

“We’re protecting the woman who owns the jewelry,” Jason said flatly. He got to his feet. “Thanks for doing this so quickly.”

Stan accepted his danger and sat back with a shrug. “No problem. We got a break — it was at the second store we contacted.”

Jason left them then, intent on heading to Carly’s house to pick up Cameron. He wanted to keep moving, to keep focusing on what was next—

Because if he stopped, he’d have to think about the fact that he’d seen the bruises on Elizabeth, had seen her that last night with a cut on her face, with an injured shoulder—

And had never once questioned if Lucky was hurting her. Not even after Sonny had suggested it might be possible. And hadn’t Jason told himself then that she’d never confide in him about it—

How could he blame the rest of the world for not seeing it? He hadn’t. And now he’d have to live with the guilt.

He shoved open the door to Kelly’s and ran straight into Robin. “Sorry—”

“Oh, hey, I was hoping to run into you.” She frowned. “You look upset.” She tipped her head to the side, squinted her eyes. “Have you been back to the penthouse?”

“Uh, yeah.” He let the door to Kelly’s close behind him. “I know—” Jason shook his head. “I know. Elizabeth told me. And she told me you knew.”

“She told you what?” Robin asked slowly, drawing out the words with a suspicious furrowing of her brows.

“Robin.” Jason just sighed. “I know what she’s been through. And that you were there for her. That you encouraged her to tell me. Thank you. I’m glad she had someone.”

“Okay.” Robin folded her arms. “A lot of good it did her — she wouldn’t listen to me back when it happened. I wanted her to leave then. I thought about telling you.”

“You should have,” Jason said flatly. “Someone should have told me—”

“Or maybe you should have seen it—” Robin scowled. “I mean, it was right in front of your face. Patrick and I both saw it—” She pursed her lips. “But I should have told you. I knew if you knew—if Emily knew—she might not have gone back. But—” She shrugged a shoulder. “Water under the bridge. She told you. She left. And now—” She bit her lip. “She did the hard part.”

She arched a brow. “Now comes the dangerous part. Most women in an abusive relationship are hurt worse after they leave. Does she have a guard?”

Jason scowled. “No.” Damn it. And he’d seen Lucky the night before. He knew exactly how angry he could get. He pulled out his phone. “I’ll send Cody over. I promised her I’d get Cameron and bring him home.” He started out of the courtyard.

“Tell her I have those pictures,” Robin called after him. “She’ll need them when she calls my uncle.”

He turned back to her for a minute. “Okay. Thanks. For being there.”

“I like Elizabeth, too, Jason. And I want her happy. She’s been through enough.”

That was something they could agree on. So Jason left, leaving Cody a voice mail to head over to the Hardy house in case Lucky showed up.

Hardy House: Living Room

Mac arrived just after Emily did, and the police commissioner was in a rotten mood. Elizabeth understood that—he’d lost a police officer the night before, and she knew Maxie must be traumatized. It was only out of respect for Audrey and her grandfather that Mac had even taken Audrey’s call and come over as quickly as he had.

“I don’t have a lot of time,” Mac snapped as Audrey closed the door behind him. “What’s this about?”

“You will not take that tone with me, Mac Scorpio,” Audrey snapped.

Emily looked back and forth between Elizabeth’s grandmother and Mac before meeting Elizabeth’s tired and puffy eyes. “What’s going on? What’s happened since last night?”

“Yeah, that’s what I’d like to know. I’ve been trying to find you for nearly twenty-four hours,” Mac retorted. “You fled the scene of a crime—you’re lucky I don’t have an arrest warrant—”

Elizabeth arched a brow. “You mean, I fled a place where a maniac was shooting at people? Yeah, I can see why that would be suspicious. You can’t get an arrest warrant for that. If you could make those charges stick, Jason would still be at the PCPD.”

“Don’t get me started on that—”

“You’re here because I need to file charges against Lucky,” Elizabeth said. Emily’s head snapped up, and she stared at Elizabeth, startled. “For assault.”

“Assault,” Mac repeated, slowly. He tensed with the air of a man who knew what was coming but was hoping like hell he was wrong. “Against who?”

“Me.” Elizabeth folded her arms tightly. “On four separate occasions, Lucky assaulted me, the last being Friday night.”

Mac cleared his throat. He scrubbed a hand over his face, then sighed. “Okay, uh, let’s just—let’s just start from the beginning. What happened?”

So Elizabeth told him. She told him in the same detail as she had Jason, but this time she was able to keep herself together. Some of the details were new for Audrey, who was weeping again. Emily put an arm around Audrey’s shoulder, her own face pale, her expression frozen like granite.

“And then Lucky left the apartment,” Elizabeth finished finally. “I got up, looked at myself in the mirror, took a call from Emily, and then left. I didn’t see Lucky again until last night when he came to Greystone and tried to get on the grounds to make me leave.”

Mac frowned, squinting. “You—You saw Lucky last night—when—”

“Before Jason and Sonny were arrested,” Elizabeth told him. “He knew where I was and knew I was there because I wanted to be.”

“Which is a very different story than he told either of us at the station last night,” Audrey reminded Mac.

“Yeah, I caught that,” Mac muttered. “Your grandmother said you’d seen him today—”

“Yeah, about a half hour ago, when he came to Gram’s door and threatened to break it down.”

Mac closed his notebook and stared down at it for a long moment. “He’s been under a little pressure,” he said, but it was clear from his tone even he didn’t believe that.

“You should have him drug tested,” Elizabeth said. “Because I’m pretty sure he pawned my jewelry to pay off his drug dealer. I think he started buying oxycontin on the street because he was always taking pills, and Patrick cut him off months ago.”

“You’re accusing him of taking drugs, too?” Mac said. “Look, I can—I can believe the rest of it, but do you have proof of this? I know this has been a rough time for you, and maybe you want to make sure Lucky can’t see your son—”

“Don’t you dare,” Emily said in a tightly controlled voice. “Because if you’re about to accuse her of lying, I will call my grandfather and make sure he calls the mayor. I am done watching you and the rest of the PCPD treat Elizabeth like this.”

“I didn’t even get a chance—” Mac looked at Elizabeth. “I believe you,” he repeated. “I don’t know about the drugs, but I don’t think you’d accuse him of the abuse if it weren’t true. I know that Lucky’s been under a lot of pressure from the job, and the injuries didn’t help. That doesn’t excuse it, but it means I believe you.”

“But?” Elizabeth prompted. “Because I can hear you saying it.”

“But it would be your word against his without evidence. The incidents that caused injury were from a month ago, and you didn’t report it—”

“Robin took pictures,” Elizabeth said. “They’re dated. Before Manny kidnapped me that night. So hopefully, you’d believe her.”

“I…” Mac pursed his lips. “I would, yes.”

“And Patrick has seen Lucky screaming at me. He’s a witness to the anger.”

“Elizabeth—”

“But you’re not going to do anything. Even with the pictures.”

“I’m going to file the report,” Mac told her. “And I’ll interview Robin and Patrick. I’ll get the pictures. I’ll take it to the DA, but Alexis probably won’t look at the case because she’s related to Lucky’s brother. And I don’t know that another DA would file charges.”

“Why?” Audrey demanded. “My granddaughter is a credible witness with proof!”

“Because of Jason,” Elizabeth said with a sinking feeling. Mac looked away. “For the same reason no one believed me about Manny. No one believed me that I hadn’t been kidnapped because of Jason. Because people will blame me for it. There are members of your department who think I got what I deserved when Manny kidnapped me. And they’ll think that I deserved what Lucky did.”

“I’m not one of them—”

“But that’s what will happen.”

Mac sighed. “Look, you did the right thing. You got out. And I’ll put together a report. There will be a paper trail. I’ll talk to Lucky about leaving you alone. And I’ll encourage him to get counseling. And a drug test. Elizabeth—”

“This is bullshit,” Emily said flatly. “I can’t believe you’re not going to do more—”

“There’s nothing else he can do,” Elizabeth said with a sad sigh. “Because he’s right. The DA’s office will never take this case. Even if it were Alexis. Because Lucky would never plead guilty. And a jury would never convict him. They’d just—they’d see the same thing everyone else does. A cop’s wife who had an affair with a criminal and ended his career. And got what she deserved for it.”

Mac, at least, had the decency to look ashamed as he nodded. “I think that might be the outcome, yeah. I’m sorry, Elizabeth. I work in the system, I can’t always make it do the right thing.”

“Especially when you agree.”

Audrey’s voice was carefully controlled as Mac looked at her. Elizabeth blinked at her in surprise, but her grandmother kept her eyes on the commissioner.

“You could push the DA. You could remind them that Jason has never once been convicted of a single thing. You could also remind them that he is, nominally, a Quartermaine. But you’re giving up. Because you think if my granddaughter had not been around Jason Morgan, none of this would have happened.”

Mac hesitated. “I wouldn’t go that far, but I think we’re forgetting that a good cop is dead because he was standing too close to Jason Morgan—”

“He’s dead because he came over to scream at me for being a whore and was standing too close to me,” Elizabeth said flatly. “Because Lucky’s drug dealer was sending him a message about paying his bills. You might believe me about some of it, but you clearly have your own narrative.”

“Elizabeth—”

“You can go. Thanks for coming. Let me know when the report is ready, so I can ask Justus to get a copy for my divorce petition.”

“I’m sorry,” Mac repeated, but he left.

“I cannot believe—” Emily took a deep breath, then dragged her hands through her hair. “Are you okay?” she asked, looking at Elizabeth. “I’m so sorry. I should have seen it—”

Elizabeth shook her head. “I didn’t want you to see it—” She sighed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for you to find out while I was telling Mac—I didn’t know how fast he’d get here—”

“You don’t have to apologize to me.” Emily took her hands in hers. “You didn’t tell me because I think a part of you was scared I might tell you the same thing I’m sure Luke did. That this isn’t Lucky, that the Lucky we know and love would never do this to you. That’s what he told you to make you stay, right? He told you had to fight for the boy who we used to know.”

“Em—”

“Because that’s the crap I used to say to you all the time. Never again,” Emily declared with a shake of her hand. “Because the boy I knew wouldn’t do that. The man he is today? I believe it. He doesn’t get one more minute of my time. You and Cameron are who matter to me.” She embraced Elizabeth tightly. “Let the Spencers worry about Lucky. He’s their problem. He never has to be yours again.”

Jake’s: Upstairs Hallway

Sam shoved open her door and frowned when she saw Alexis waiting in the hallway. “How did you know—”

“You said you were leaving, so I had someone find out which flight you were on. And I took a chance you’d be staying at Jake’s because it’s under the radar.” Alexis looked down at the duffel bad in Sam’s hand. “You have to leave today? Now?”

“There’s nothing here for me,” Sam said with a shrug. “What’s the point? What are you doing here?”

“I’m here because there’s something I need to say before you walk away forever.” Alexis waited, but Sam didn’t drop the bag or offer to let her in. “Fine. We’ll do this it this way. I understand you were disappointed to learn I was your biological mother—”

Sam snorted. “Disappointed isn’t the word—”

“And being connected by blood doesn’t mean anything. I’m a Cassadine. We spend a lot of time running from our blood relatives.” Alexis folded her arms. “Sometimes, we get to choose our family, Sam, but I understand that right now, you don’t have a lot of interest in choosing me.”

“No, I don’t. Can I go now—”

“But you’re not just turning me away,” Alexis continued. “You’re walking away from Kristina and Molly. I know how close you were to your brother. How fiercely devoted you were to him.”

“Don’t talk to me about Danny—” Her throat tightened. “How dare you—”

“My girls could use an older sister who loves like that.” Alexis stepped to the side. “You can go, Sam. Knowing you’re alive, that you’re in the world—that gives me peace. For so long, you were a devastating memory. I blamed myself for a long time for not being stronger, for not finding a way to keep you. I thought you’d died because I was weak.”

Sam just stared at her biological mother as Alexis took a bracing breath. “But you’re alive, Sam. And that’s enough for me. I can make it enough.”

“I’m going to go now.” Sam started down the hallway, but she heard Alexis following her. When they reached the empty bar downstairs—it hadn’t yet opened up for the night rush—Sam turned to her. “I don’t need you. I don’t need your kids. I don’t need a family. I’m fine on my own.”

“If you ever change your mind,” Alexis said, “I’ll be here.”

“I won’t.”

And then Sam left.

Hardy House: Front Porch

Emily stayed for a little while longer, but then she had to get back to the hospital. About an hour after she’d left, there was another knock at the door.

Audrey had gone upstairs to start putting together a list of people to call in case Elizabeth decided she wanted to go war against the PCPD and force charges to be filed.

Elizabeth didn’t think she was going to go that far, but she appreciated how much support her grandmother had offered her since she’d come home. She knew Audrey wasn’t totally sold on Jason, but she was willing to lay down her guard and give him a chance.

She hoped it was Jason at her doorstep, bringing Cameron back to her—and when she opened the door to find her grinning son, smiling sunnily at her from Jason’s arms, Elizabeth couldn’t help but grin back.

“Hi, Mommy. Jason bringed me home.” He leaned forward to hug her, and Jason transferred Cameron into her arms. “Love you, Mommy.”

“I love you, too, Cam.” She closed her eyes and hugged him tightly. “Did you have fun with Aunt Carly and Morgan?”

“We eated lots of sugar. All the candy. Morgan says it’s cuz his daddy says no fun, and his mommy says too much fun.” He grinned at her, flashing his baby teeth. “Then Jason comed, and said I get to go home to Gram. He said my toys be here later.”

“Cody is bringing over Cameron’s things,” Jason told her. “The toys and clothes at least. I figured you’d want them.” He hesitated. “I can go—”

“No, no—wait—” She pressed a kiss to Cameron’s cheek. “Guess what? Gram is upstairs in her room, and I think she needs a great, big Cam hug.”

“I go do that. I love my Gram.” Cameron waved, then started for the stairs. She and Jason watched he gradually climbed the staircase, carefully holding onto the railing as he lifted his tiny legs onto the next step.

He waved again from the top of the stairs, then disappeared down the hall. Elizabeth smiled after him, then looked back at Jason. “Let’s talk outside. “It’s a nice day, and I’m tired of being inside.”

Jason nodded. “Uh, when Cody gets back, I asked him to hang out—”

“I was going to ask you about that,” she said as she leaned against the wall of her house. “Because Lucky showed up here, and I just—I don’t want to deal with it. I’d rather someone stopped him before he got that close again. I don’t want my grandmother or Cameron to have to worry.”

“You won’t have to worry about him anymore.” Jason paused. “I have something for you—” He reached into his jacket and drew out two plastic bags. “I thought about leaving these with the pawnshops because I didn’t know if you’d want to report them stolen, but—”

“You found my jewelry.” Pleased, Elizabeth took the bags. “I thought about filing charges of theft, but—we’ll get into that—” She hesitated, looking at the bag with just the wedding ring. “Well, at least he didn’t just pawn my stuff—”

“He pawned it in March.”

Elizabeth blinked at Jason, then looked back at the bag, with the pawn slip attached. “March 27,” she murmured. “Less than two weeks after Patrick cut him off, he was already out of money for the drugs. I know you said it had been that long, but I guess—” She shook her head. “You know what makes me sad about this? I mean, more than the rest of it. What really gets me?”

“What?”

She met his eyes. “I never noticed his wedding ring was gone. All those weeks—and I never noticed.” She opened the door slightly and tossed both bags on a table just inside the door, then closed the door again. “I’ll give it to Luke or Bobbie. They can give it to him. It’s not my problem.”

Jason nodded. “How did, uh, how did your grandmother take it?”

“She was upset. You know she felt bad for how hard she’d been on me. And then when Lucky showed up, she wanted to call Mac. So I agreed. I called Emily, too. They both came over.” Elizabeth bit her lip. “I filed a report, but Mac doesn’t think the DA’s office will press charges. Even with the pictures Robin took.”

“Because Lucky’s a cop,” Jason said. “And—”

“And the department still thinks I’m the whore that ruined his career,” Elizabeth finished. “Yeah, pretty much. Mac believes me, he said, but he’s not willing to push for it either. So…” She shrugged. “I did what I could. And Emily is—she’s taking my side. Which I’m not sure I one hundred percent expected. I made an appointment with Justus to file for divorce.”

“Good.” Jason nodded. “And Santiago Escobar will not be a problem,” he told her. “Don’t worry about that.”

“I figured.” She smiled up at him. “You know how hard as this day has been, I’m glad I did it. I’m glad I told you, that I told Emily and my grandmother—that I stopped hiding.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t see it—” Jason shook his head. “I should have—”

“We were both swimming in guilt, Jason,” she said softly. “I realize now part of me thought I deserved it. Because maybe he was right. Maybe if I had loved him better or at all—it wouldn’t have been that way.”

“Elizabeth—”

“I know that’s not true—that I didn’t deserve it. But that’s why I could hide it. Because to you, it looked like guilt for what we were doing. You felt it, too. For what you were doing to Sam.” She bit her lip. “I’m not proud of what we did, Jason. But I don’t know if we could have stopped it. We should have.”

“I—” He cleared his throat. “Yeah, I guess we should have.”

“I don’t want to live my life in the dark like that again.” She met his eyes. “I know you’re okay with taking it slow. I need it. I need this time and space. But I also need you. And I’m not sure how we make that work.”

“We’ll figure it out,” he told her. Then he tipped his head to the side. “I love you.”

Elizabeth blinked. “I—” Her chest tightened as tears stung her eyes. God, she hadn’t realized how much she’d wanted to hear him say it. Even if she knew it was probably true—

She really had needed to hear him say it. At least once.

“Jason—” Her voice faltered, and she looked down.

He shook his head. “I didn’t say it so you’d say it back. I just—I didn’t want you to think that it needed to be a secret. It’s not something you have to pry out of me. I know I don’t…that I don’t always tell you what I should.”

“I begged you once to ask me,” she murmured. Elizabeth lifted her eyes to meet his. “And I wanted you to do that. I wanted it to be your move. I didn’t want to be brave. It seemed easier if it was a question. But you were right. If you had to ask me, then I wasn’t ready to offer it.”

Elizabeth fisted her hand in his shirt and drew him in for a long, slow kiss — right on her front porch where anyone driving past could see them. “I love you, too,” she murmured when he pulled back. “I know whatever happens next might be hard, but I just—I don’t want us to throw it away again.”

“We won’t.” He kissed her again. “I promise.”

“Stay for dinner,” she said. “Cameron will want pizza and his Spiderman movie. And I want my grandmother to see you with him.”

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

She smiled at him as she pushed open the door and they went inside. She stood at the bottom of the stairs. “Hey, Cameron, Gram—we’re going to order pizza for dinner! Jason’s staying—”

“YAY!” came her son’s excited shout. She heard his footsteps as he ran down the hallway and started to hurry down the steps. Audrey came to the top of the stairs just as Jason met Cameron halfway, both obviously worried Cameron might fall.

Audrey smiled as Cameron threw himself into Jason’s arms. “We watch Biderman?” Cameron demanded. “Get sausage pizza?”

“Yeah, but you have to sing the song for me again. I forgot how it goes,” Jason said as they came to the bottom of the stairs.

“Biderman, Biderman, Biderman. Does what Biders can! Look out! Biderman!” Cameron sang loudly as Elizabeth caught her grandmother’s sparkling eyes as Audrey fought a smile.

Then Elizabeth laughed, watching her son sing happily with his new best friend, excited to watch his favorite movie for the hundredth time.

She couldn’t think of a better way to end the day.

THE END

One day she will tell you that she has had enough
It’s coming round again
Do you feel like a man
When you push her around?
Do you feel better now, as she falls to the ground?
Well I’ll tell you my friend, one day this world’s got to end
As your lies crumble down, a new life she has found
– Facedown, The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

---

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Courtland Street: Alley

Jason parked his bike a block away from the area where he knew Santiago Escobar dealt drugs and did most of his business. He didn’t want the engine to give him away.

The night before, when Lucky had shown up at the gatehouse, there had been a light in his eyes, a weird energy in the way he carried himself—Jason had wondered at the source but hadn’t let the thought really take control. He didn’t have time to worry about Lucky Spencer, not with Elizabeth looking more done with him than ever before.

She’d walked away from Spencer last night without blinking, and he’d planned to follow her lead. Until he’d seen Lucky at the PCPD the night before—until this morning when Elizabeth’s jewelry was missing. The valuable pieces that might bring some decent cash at a pawnshop.

The cop buying drugs from the Escobars, a problem with a customer, stolen jewelry—it all added up, and Jason didn’t know how any of them had missed it. He’d avoided Lucky, and he knew Elizabeth felt guilty—

But it was clear to him that Lucky had become addicted to something in the last few months which meant Elizabeth had been the target last night—and Beaudry, the victim of a ricochet by a young, immature idiot who didn’t know better.

Santiago Escobar had his back to the street, dealing with a customer when Jason reached the entrance to the alley. The greasy man buying from Santiago paled when he realized who was standing behind his dealer.

“Uh, never mind—” He spun and took off down the alley, tripping and falling into a pile of trash.

“What the hell—” Santiago started to call after him, but his words were choked out as Jason grabbed him by the shoulders, threw him up against the brick wall of the building. He pressed his forearm against the dealer’s neck, watching as Santiago’s eyes bulged slightly.

“Morgan—what—”

“Didn’t your uncle tell you we were interested in you?” Jason shook his head. “Because I am. Do you know who was at the park yesterday?”

“Listen—it was a misunderstanding—a customer—”

“Who’s the customer?” Jason increased the pressure slightly, and Santiago gasped. “Who?”

“Uncle Matty told me not—”

“You think you can take a shot at me and walk away—”

“It wasn’t you—it was—”

“You shot at Elizabeth, didn’t you?” Jason demanded. “Because Lucky Spencer wasn’t paying his bills?” When Santiago gulped, Jason knew he’d been right. He released the dealer suddenly, letting him drop onto the filthy concrete ground.

Santiago was on all fours, gasping for air. “I didn’t know—”

“You’re too stupid to live,” Jason said, nearly as insulted as he was furious. He grabbed Santiago by the hair and threw him back against the wall. “You didn’t know who Elizabeth Webber is? You don’t pay attention to the news?”

“Her name is Spencer, dude—” Santiago wheezed as Jason slammed his fist into the asshole’s gut. “Oh, shit, shit. Shit. She was there with you?” His eyes bulged in horror. “Oh, shit.”

“Yeah, oh, shit,” Jason repeated. Without breaking a sweat, he threw Santiago against the other brick building. He slumped, falling to the ground. “You touch her or her kid—you even breathe in her direction, I’ll make you sorry you were ever born.”

“It was a mistake,” Santiago blubbered. Blood was seeping from a deep gash on his forehead. “A mistake—”

“You sent two shooters to a crowded park full of kids and innocent people so you could shoot at a customer’s wife because he owed you money?” Jason crouched down to look at the nearly incoherent drug dealer. “The only reason you’re not already dead is because your uncle said he’d deal with you.”

“B-But—”

“You stay away from Kelly’s. The high school—Luke’s—” Jason stood up and looked around the alley. “You see this alley? This is yours. You don’t leave again. You or anyone else. This is the only warning you get.”

“You—” Santiago rolled over onto his side, coughing. “Sonny would never go against my uncle—”

Jason kicked him hard—Santiago fell onto his back, moaning. “This isn’t about your uncle or Sonny. This is about you.” Jason knelt one more time. “Don’t make me regret leaving you alive.”

When Santiago just nodded, finally out of his bravado, Jason took a deep breath. “Now tell me about Lucky Spencer.”

Greystone Manor: Living Room

Sonny frowned when Jason walked back into the room three hours after he’d left. “What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

Jason took a deep breath and looked at him. “I know what happened yesterday. Mateo swore it wasn’t about us. It wasn’t, but Elizabeth was the target. He just didn’t know who she was.”

“How can you be so sure?” Sonny wandered over the minibar, then winced. It was barely two in the afternoon. Without pouring the bourbon, he turned back to his partner. “Where have you been?”

“I took Elizabeth to the apartment to pack a few things, and when we got there—” Jason swallowed hard, remembering the destruction of Cameron’s bedroom, of the broken pieces of plastic that had once been the toddler’s prized toys. “It looked like Lucky had gone on a rampage. Things were torn up everywhere.”

Sonny winced. “Oh, man—”

“And Elizabeth realized her jewelry was missing. Jewelry that was there on Thursday. Before the shooting.”

Sonny furrowed his brow, but Jason could see his point was getting through to the other man. “What kind of pieces?”

“Elizabeth said they were relatively valuable. Not insanely expensive, but not cheap. A few things passed from her family. Something that might interest a pawnshop.”

“The cop we thought might be undercover,” Sonny said slowly, “was a cop making a legit buy. A cop who might want something to relieve the pain.” He exhaled slowly. “Damn it.”

“I went to Courtland Street,” Jason said flatly. “And I found Santiago Escobar. He confirmed it. Lucky Spencer’s been buying from him since March. At first, it was just oxycontin. But in the last month, he’s been buying heroin—”

“Christ—”

“On credit,” Jason finished. “When Lucky refused to pay on Friday, Santiago told his boys to send him a message. They were supposed to shoot at Elizabeth to make it clear to Lucky they could get to his family. Beaudry—it was a ricochet or something—”

He shook his head. “Lucky stole her jewelry and pawned it along with anything else he could find in the apartment. Their television was missing, too. Elizabeth didn’t realize it when we were, but I went back to the apartment to check. He made good with the Escobars today. Because he knew that the Escobars had shot up the park and why.”

“Oh, man—this is—” Sonny sat in the armchair. “They really are dumb as hell—” He stared at Jason. “That’s why Lucky was looking for Elizabeth last night. Why he was so desperate for her to come with him. He knew they were shooting at her.”

“The Escobars aren’t like you, Sonny. They’re not even like Moreno or Sorel. Or they weren’t. Mateo’s always been happy as long as you let him run his product in his territory. But Santiago is greedy, and he didn’t even think twice about going after a cop’s family. That’s a special kind of stupid.”

“So Elizabeth was, again, the target for something that had nothing to do with us.”

“Yeah.” Jason exhaled. And he’d nearly walked away from her again, thinking she might be safer without him. “I put Stan on the pawnshops — I want to get her things back. But I have to tell her, Sonny.”

“She didn’t know about the drugs? She never said anything?”

“No, but—” Jason hesitated. “She never got into the details of what was wrong with Lucky. I thought it was mostly about me, but maybe—maybe it wasn’t.” He shook his head. “I don’t think she knew.”

Sonny sighed. “You should go tell Elizabeth. She needs to get that divorce filed immediately and make it known to the world she’s not to blame for that idiot husband. Man, Lucky was such a great kid. I don’t know what the hell happened to him.” He grimaced. “And I’ll talk to Mateo again. We need to put a lid on this before the PCPD makes trouble for us all.”

Jason shook his head—it wasn’t the action he wanted Sonny to take, but he hadn’t expected much anyway. He’d have to keep a closer eye on the Escobars himself and step up if Sonny wouldn’t.

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Elizabeth sighed as she wrote down the name of the fifth broken toy from the box she’d had one of the guards bring up from storage. She wanted to get Cameron’s things replaced as soon as possible—she didn’t want him to even know they were missing.

She turned over the Spiderman figure—one of four Cameron owned—and searched in the box until she found the missing leg. It had been broken into two pieces—

This had been deliberate. Lucky to have smashed it with his heel. Some of the pieces had been so obliterated, they were still shards of plastic in the carpet back at the apartment.

She’d save this toy, save these broken pieces as a reminder of why she could never—ever—go back.

Elizabeth turned at the sound of the key in the lock and managed a half-smile for Jason as he returned, tossing his keys onto the table. “Hey.” She got to her feet and folded her arms. “I was just thinking about dinner. I haven’t eaten since—” She stopped at the look on his face. “What’s wrong?”

Jason scratched his brow, then looked at the broken toys she’d been sorting through. “Let’s—let’s sit for a minute.”

“No, Jason. Tell me what’s wrong.” She crossed the room to him and put a hand on his forearm. “What happened?” She turned his hand over to look at his knuckles. The skin was broken slightly, and a bruise was forming. “Jason?”

“I know what happened to your jewelry,” Jason said after a long moment. He stripped off his jacket and tossed it on the sofa behind them. “Lucky pawned it to pay off Santiago Escobar.”

“Pay off—” Elizabeth closed her eyes. “You said he was a drug dealer. Patrick refused to write him a new prescription for his pain pills a few months ago,” she said in a soft voice. “I know Lucky struggled with that. I thought he’d figured it out—Patrick said he’d stopped screaming at him for a new script. He just…found someone else to give him the pills.”

“Yeah, I talked to Escobar. Lucky started going to him in March. And then…last month, he started buying heroin regularly. It’s a stronger high—Lucky probably had built a tolerance—”

Elizabeth shook her head. “You don’t—” Her mind spun for a moment. “You don’t have to explain. I get it. He’s been on drugs. For months.” She hadn’t even thought—hadn’t even considered—

“Yeah.”

Elizabeth turned away from him and dragged her hands through her hair. “Oh, man. I didn’t—I knew he was in pain. I knew he was angry all the time. But I was just—I was so wrapped up in my own guilt about what was happening with you, and then Manny—I didn’t see it—didn’t carry it to the logical conclusion.” She turned back. “He pawned my jewelry to pay them off. Which meant he owed them money. That’s what yesterday was about?”

“It was just supposed to be a warning to Lucky,” Jason said. “It looks like Beaudry really was an accident. Lucky paid up this morning.”

“Oh, my God—” She pressed the heels of her hands into her eyes. “Oh, my God. I let my son live in a home with a man high on drugs—I left Cameron alone with him—That day—at the hospital—he drove Cameron there—”

“Elizabeth—”

“There were probably drugs in the apartment. What if Cameron had gotten his hands on them—”

“He didn’t.” Jason reached for her hands and pulled them away from her face, forcing her to look at him. “Hey. He didn’t. He’s safe. You left, and Cameron is safe. We can go get him if you need to see for yourself—”

“I just—”

Elizabeth collapsed onto the sofa, feeling like she’d been punched in the gut. “I went back to him. I—” Her lip trembled. “You don’t even know the half of it, Jason. You don’t know how bad it was. And I went back because I thought I could save him. I thought if I could just be patient—but he was doing drugs—heroin. He was on heroin. And—”

Jason sat next to her and picked up the broken Spiderman. He stared at it for a long moment before looking back at her. “How bad was it?” he asked softly.

She clasped her hands into her lap. “The first time was the day Cameron got sick. You remember? You went into the store, and you bought him that Pedialyte because he couldn’t eat.”

“I remember.”

“You wouldn’t let me pay you back, and I—I—it was name brand. I wouldn’t have bought it. We can’t afford that. When Lucky came home, and he realized you had bought it—he was angry. I hadn’t seen him that angry since—”

Since the brainwashing. Since he’d attacked Jason with a knife.

Elizabeth swallowed hard and looked at Jason. His face hadn’t changed, although she was sure he knew where this conversation was going. “He was screaming at me about taking favors from you, and then he started to dump it out—and I was so tired—I even—Cameron needed that, Jason. He needed it. And I just—I tried to st-stop him.”

She didn’t even realize she was tapping her foot so hard her knee was bouncing until Jason put a hand over her clasped hands, the weight of his arm keeping her leg down. “I think it really was an accident the first time. He pushed me away from him—and I just—I went flying. I guess—I don’t weigh a lot.” She sighed. “Maybe I need to think it was an accident.”

“The bruise on your face,” Jason said slowly.

“I hit the door frame of the kitchen.” Tears slid down her cheeks. “He was so upset. I told him to leave, but he was crying, and he said he was sorry—and I just—I thought—it was an accident.”

He swallowed hard. “You said it was the first time.”

“The next night. We—we were fighting.”

“Because I was there—” Jason closed his eyes, shook his head slightly. “I’m sorry—”

“No, don’t be—I knew I should make you leave. I knew he would be angry if you were still there, but Cameron—he just fell in love with you, Jason. And he was so happy—” Elizabeth dipped her head. “He grabbed me that day. Left bruises.”

“The next day, you left him. That Thursday before you were kidnapped.” Jason straightened. “You had a cut on your face. And you looked like your shoulder was hurt.” He shook his head, disgusted.

“Lucky found out Cameron was with Morgan. He—he said he was going to the Brownstone, and I thought maybe he was going after my son, so I had to stop him—and it was just—he shoved me, and I hit the table, fell over, and the lamp broke—I—”

She wept bitterly now, sobs spilling from deep inside—because just recounting it out loud, saying it like this—

How could she ever have gone back—how could she have forgotten—

Jason drew her close, put an arm around her shoulder, pressed his lips to her forehead. “Hey. Hey—”

“I went back. I felt so guilty—that’s why Lucky—Manny saw the bruises. He kidnapped Lucky because he hurt me—how fucked up is that, Jason? And Manny was telling him about you on my speed dial, and Lucky was looking at me—and I was so scared—because I thought if Manny let him go—”

She drew in a deep, shuddering breath. “But I went back. I went back. Because Luke asked me to. He just—he asked me to fight for the boy. Again. And I didn’t want to, but I thought—well, Lucky never gave up on me—”

“Damn it, Elizabeth—” Jason muttered under his breath. “Do you really think this is the same thing?”

“No, of course not.” Elizabeth swiped at her cheeks, trying to get herself under control. “No. I know it’s not. But I think—God, I think I needed to go back, Jason. I need to stop making excuses. I thought if I could love him enough, if I could be a good wife, I could save him. But it’s not my job to save Lucky. And I don’t want to. I don’t think he can be saved.”

She sighed. “I went back because I thought maybe it was a crazy couple of days. Because Lucky had never ever hurt me like that before, and I really thought if he could acknowledge it, get counseling, it was something that we could get past. I don’t know if I really thought I was staying forever when Luke asked—he only asked me to stay for a little while. Until Lucky was out of the hospital and had recovered.”

“He didn’t have any right to—”

“He knew that, Jason.” She shook her head as Jason scowled. “I’m not making excuses for him. Luke told me he hated himself for asking. He’s Lucky’s father. You know what it is to love a child. Is there anything you wouldn’t do for Michael?”

“If Michael were an abusive asshole who took his anger out on someone who loved him, I wouldn’t be asking the woman to go back,” Jason said. He got to his feet. “I’d be kicking the shit out of Michael and asking who the hell raised him—” He took a quick, sharp breath. “I’m sorry. You don’t need this from me.”

“I went back because I thought there was still a chance I could help him. And if I hadn’t done it, Jason, I might have lived for the rest of my life thinking there might be a chance.” Elizabeth stood up as well, hugging her arms around her torso. “There’s not. I know that now. I know it with every breath in my body. I knew it before that last day on Friday. I was already done. I just didn’t get the chance to tell him before—”

“Did he—” Jason fisted his hands at his side.

“He grabbed me from behind the way Tom Baker did, and then threw me against the wall,” Elizabeth said in a flat tone. “And I sat there, and I just—I just wanted it to be over. He left. Blaming me. Because he knew I didn’t love him. And—man—for a few minutes there, I thought, ‘This is my fault’—”

“No—”

“Because I went back to him knowing I didn’t love him. I wanted my vows to mean something, but I forgot the most important one. To love and to cherish. I don’t love him, and he didn’t cherish me. Because the vows—it doesn’t matter if I was keeping any of those promises—we both had to keep them. And we didn’t.”

She felt stronger now, more at peace with this now. “I wasn’t going to tell you, Jason. I was going to let you think we’d fought over you and me at the docks, about anger management—but yesterday—you tried to push me away again because you wanted me to be safe.”

Jason just looked at her, anguish in his eyes. “I didn’t know—” His voice was rough, pained.

“I’m tired of being safe. Of taking the easy way out. Of lying to myself. I don’t love Lucky. And I don’t want to be safe. I want to be happy, and I was last night with you. Yesterday at the carnival, when you were on that silly roller coaster with boys—I just—”

She smiled at him. “I saw our future. I saw what I thought I might want if we didn’t run away again. And that’s what I want. You make me feel safe and happy.”

“I was happy, too,” he said in a low voice. “Because—” He shook his head. “No. Not yet.” Jason took a deep breath. “You want to take this slow, and that’s what I want for you. Since we know the reason behind the shooting, you don’t have to stay if you don’t want—”

“I do want to stay,” Elizabeth said softly. “But that’s why I should go. Because the next time I spend the night in your arms, Jason, I want it to because I’m ready for it to be a permanent step.”

She sighed. “I should go home. Because you’re not the only person who deserves to hear this from me. I need to tell my grandmother. And Emily. Robin thinks I should tell her uncle—to make a report—”

“Robin knows?” Jason frowned. “What—”

“She and Patrick saw the bruises, and she convinced me to take pictures the day I was kidnapped. So she has those if I file a report.” Elizabeth took a deep breath. “And I think I should. Because Robin said something else. I did the hard part — I left. But now I have to make it count. I should call Justus and make it permanent.” She sighed. “And yeah, I should call Mac. Not just about the abuse. If Lucky’s on drugs, I’m not the only person who should know that.”

Hardy House: Living Room

Audrey must have heard the car pull up in the driveway or seen them through the window, because she was already on her feet, in the middle of the living room with a scowl fixed on her face.

“Gram—”

“I cannot believe you’re still with him,” Audrey said flatly. “Where’s Cameron? Is he still with Sonny Corinthos?”

“No, he’s with Carly and Morgan,” Elizabeth said, already feeling exhausted. “Gram—”

“I don’t know what’s going on here. One second, you’re married to Lucky, and now you’re spending the night with Jason Morgan—” Audrey looked at Jason. “You should leave, Mr. Morgan—”

“I should,” Jason agreed, touching Elizabeth’s elbow. “I don’t want to make this any harder than it already is—”

“No—don’t—” Elizabeth took a deep breath. “Not yet.”

“Elizabeth—” Audrey began.

“Do you remember when I told you Manny Ruiz kidnapped me because he was obsessed with me? That it had nothing to do with Jason and you decided that wasn’t true? Just like the PCPD, you ignored that.”

“I—” Audrey hesitated. The certainty, the righteousness, faded from her face. “Elizabeth—”

“The shooters at the carnival were there for me. To shoot at me. Not to kill me, but to send a message to someone that they could get to me at any time or place.”

And she could see the minute it was starting to click for her grandmother because, of course, Elizabeth wasn’t referring to Jason—why would Jason still be there?

Audrey’s hands fell to her side. “Send a message to who?”

“You saw him last night, Mrs. Hardy,” Jason offered, his voice quiet, respectful. “You know something is wrong with Lucky. You told Mac you knew Elizabeth was safe where she was. You didn’t help him.”

Audrey touched her throat, took a deep breath. “I have to admit—there was something in his eyes that I didn’t like. Something in the way—” She looked at Elizabeth. “Oh. Oh. It is the same.”

“Gram—”

“Just like Tom.” Color slid from her grandmother’s cheek, the angry red flush paling into a stark white. “Oh, Elizabeth.” She strode forward. “Are you all right?”

“I am now.” Elizabeth took Audrey’s hand in hers. “Because I left. I wasn’t going to tell anyone, but last night—” She looked at Jason, who looked a bit mystified at Audrey’s turn around. “Last night, I realized that pretending it didn’t happen is the wrong thing to do. I need to face it. I need to tell the people who matter to me.”

Audrey touched her face, then looked at Jason again, with a gentler expression. “I—I’m sorry. I shouldn’t jump to conclusions—”

“It’s okay, Mrs. Hardy—”

“It’s not,” Elizabeth said fiercely. “I love you, Gram. But Jason is part of my life. He loves Cameron. He loves my little boy more than Lucky ever has. I’m not—it’s not like I’m running out to divorce Lucky so I can move in with Jason. But he’s important to me. And he’s important to Cameron. I need to know if that’s something you can deal with.”

“Well, I suppose that since I’ve suggested you stay with Ric Lansing and Lucky Spencer, my ability to judge a person’s character is lacking,” Audrey said finally. She looked at Jason. “I can accept that.”

Jason’s phone buzzed. When he saw Stan’s name on the voice mail list, he sighed. “I have to go take this. Are you okay?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m okay. Can you go get Cameron for me? I want him home with me, and with Gram.”

“I’ll be back in a little while.” He nodded to Audrey, then left.

“Darling, do you want to talk about it?” Audrey asked.

“No, but I need to,” Elizabeth said with a sigh as she followed her grandmother to the sofa. And then told her everything.

Hey, you call me up again just to break me like a promise
So casually cruel in the name of being honest
I’m a crumpled up piece of paper lying here
‘Cause I remember it all, all, all too well
Time won’t fly, it’s like I’m paralyzed by it
I’d like to be my old self again, but I’m still trying to find it
– All Too Well, Taylor Swift

---

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Greystone: Guest Room

Elizabeth stirred awake as she heard sounds in the room around her. Forgetting momentarily where she was, she rolled over and opened her eyes. She expected to see Cameron bounding out of his bedroom to climb onto her sofa bed and ask for something to eat.

Instead, she found the dimly lit, luxuriously furnished guest room at Sonny’s estate, the hint of the morning sun sliding between the openings in the curtains—

And across the room, Jason Morgan was pulling on a pair of black cotton briefs.

Oh, right.

She closed her eyes and fell on her back, staring up at the cream-colored ceiling, pulling the sheet up under her shoulders.

She’d slept with Jason. She’d asked him to stay—and he had.

“Hey.”

She felt the bed dip under his weight as his voice came closer. Elizabeth opened her eyes again, turning her head again to find that Jason was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking at her.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” he murmured. “I was worried that Cameron might come in.”

“Oh.” Elizabeth sat up, clutching the sheet to her chest and dragging a hand through her hair. “Um, what time is it?” she asked as she looked around for a clock. “It’s…almost six?”

“Yeah, you should go back to sleep,” he told her. “We, ah—” Jason cleared his throat. “We didn’t go to bed until a few hours ago.”

Her cheeks flushed. “No, but—” She took a deep breath. “Cam wakes up at seven most of the time, so there’s no point.” Elizabeth met his eyes, but it was hard to read the expression in the dim room. “So. Hey.”

The corner of his mouth lifted slightly. “Hey.”

“So, this, um—” Elizabeth laughed, shook her head. “I’m sorry. I don’t—I feel so silly. I don’t know what I’m supposed to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything.” He tipped his head to the side. “Are you okay? With…”

“I don’t know,” Elizabeth answered honestly. “I…I’m not sorry. I don’t have any regrets,” she added in a hurry when he sighed. “I just…um, I didn’t wake up yesterday and think today’s the day I’m going to—” She huffed. “I’m not explaining this right.”

“Elizabeth.”

She bit her lip and met his eyes again. “I’m not sorry. Yesterday was insane. And I was scared. For you, for me, for the boys, and Emily. I hate that they saw that. And I was irritated because I knew we were going to have to have that fight, you know? And I just—” She leaned back against the headboard. “I didn’t think we’d have to have that conversation for a while.”

“I’m sorry.” He took a deep breath. “I know it feels like we always have the same fight.”

“Because we do.” Elizabeth rolled her eyes and huffed. “And I manage to win in the moment, but it’s like—I win the battle, but I never get to stop fighting the war. I don’t want to do this again next year, in two years.” She met his eyes. “This is the last time, Jason. I don’t know what I want tomorrow to look like. But I know that I’m done convincing you that this is something I am choosing with my eyes wide open. You either accept that, or you don’t.”

“And I accept it,” he said simply. “You’re right. And I get it. This wasn’t something either of us was planning to deal with yet. So if you…” He gestured at the bed, at the sheet she was still clutching against her like a suit of armor. “If you’re not ready, you’re not ready.”

“I just—I don’t know,” Elizabeth answered. “I just know that I don’t want to hurt you. I’ve done that enough. I’m not going back to Lucky. But I just don’t know that I’m ready to choose this. Not yet. I want to be. And last night…” She reached out to touch his cheek. “Last night wasn’t a decision I made lightly. I wanted to be with you. And I’m not sorry.”

“I’m not sorry, either.”

“So what happens today?” she asked. “With all of this—I know you hate to talk about business with me—”

Jason hesitated. “It’s not that I hate it—that’s a rule Sonny taught me. Don’t tell anyone who needs plausible deniability. But it’s also an easy way to keep people out. Sonny does that. And I don’t want to do that. Not again.” He paused. “And you were right when you said if you choose this, if you walk over that line, you deserve to understand the risk.”

He’d remembered. “Thank you.”

“You’ve proven you can be trusted. And you’re here because I asked you to come. The way Carly just drops everything and brings Michael and Morgan if she’s asked to. That’s just something she does, no matter how terrible things are with Sonny or how much they argue. Thank you for that.”

“It’s what you needed, and it was the safest place for my son. There was no contest.”

“I told you last night we were waiting to hear from Mateo Escobar. He’s a small-time guy, runs a couple of clubs over on Courtland Street. They run the drugs in Port Charles,” Jason admitted. “Sonny used to try to keep them out, but—”

“But they just kept coming. Moreno, Sorel, Roscoe…” Elizabeth nodded. “I remember. I know some of the Escobars. They were always in the ER being stitched up when I was on my rotation there. Why would they come after you?”

“They’ve been pushing out of their territory lately,” Jason admitted. “Luke’s, the high school, Kelly’s. Sonny hadn’t decided to do anything about it yet, which is why yesterday doesn’t make sense. It’s…” He shook his head. “I don’t know. If it’s not the Escobars—I don’t know. And I hate that. It’s one thing to think it’s probably not us, but I’d rather know for sure.”

“So….I guess Cameron and I might be here a while?” she asked, unsure how she would ever explain that to her grandmother without an argument. And she still had to deal with the end of her marriage—

But Jason was already shaking his head. “No. Jesse Beaudry is—a cop’s dead. No one is going to want to keep the heat going. But…” He sighed. “I’m sorry. I don’t know. Maybe one more night to be safe—”

“Okay.” She flashed him a smile when he didn’t look convinced. “Really, Jason. It’s okay. We’ll wait to see what happens after Sonny meets with this guy. I better get up and get showered. Maybe I can get something to eat before Cameron gets going.”

“I should go before he gets up.” He winced. “Or before Carly does. I’m not in the mood to have that argument.”

“Me either,” Elizabeth offered dryly, as she watched him finish dressing. She got out of bed and found the robe Carly had left for her. She tied the belt as Jason pulled on his shirt and picked up his boots.

Before he left, she went to him to lightly brush her lips over his. “I meant it. I’m not sorry,” she told him softly.

“Me, either.” He kissed her again, then left.

No Name Restaurant: Private Room

Sonny frowned as the door closed on Mateo Escobar and his entourage. He turned to Jason, gestured back at the door. “What do you think about that?”

“I don’t like it,” Jason said with a shake of his head. “He thinks we should relax because it was his nephew who ordered the shooting, and he’s being dealt with.” Jason shook his head. “No. He refused to give us the name of the customer or tell us what the problem was so we could check up on it..”

“And why the hell they picked that moment to shoot at a crowd of kids? With my kid and enforcer standing right in the line of fire?” Sonny shook his head and sipped the coffee as Jason paced the small room. “That idiot Santiago felt secure enough to order a hit that killed a cop—”

“You think he’s lying about the target? You still think it was Beaudry?” Jason went to the window to watch as Mateo’s car pulled out of the parking lot, followed by two more SUVs. “Pretty dumb to take out a cop, even if he was undercover.”

Sonny squinted. “The only thing I am sure of is that Carly and Elizabeth can take the kids home. We don’t have to stay on the estate—”

Jason looked at him, bewildered. “We don’t know who the target was—Elizabeth was still in the line of fire—”

“She was, but she was grazed. Beaudry was hit with a headshot. He picked the wrong moment to get bitchy with her—it was probably the first time he was facing the shooters—” Sonny got to his feet. “I don’t think we’re out of the woods as far as the Escobars are concerned, but I also don’t think we need to worry about Carly or Elizabeth and the kids.”

Jason shook his head. “Sonny—”

“Look—” His partner looked at him as he stood by the door, his hand on the handle. “I get it. You and Elizabeth aren’t sure what you are, and she was lucky yesterday. The boys being there, Emily being there—it’s a lot. But I’m not locking Carly up any longer than I have to. She only agrees to come to the estate if I don’t push it.”

When Jason said nothing, Sonny sighed. “If you’re really not convinced Elizabeth and Cameron are safe, then take them to your place. They’d probably be more comfortable there anyway.” Sonny tilted his head. “Or maybe you’re worried if you push it another night, Elizabeth might not want to stay—”

Jason shook his head. He wished Sonny would stop saying shit like that—dropping hints that whatever was happening with Elizabeth was that weak. After yesterday—after last night—he knew without a doubt that Elizabeth wouldn’t balk at spending a night at his place to keep Cameron safe.

She’d never blinked, never hesitated—not once in all these weeks. Stalked and kidnapped by a psychopath, shot it in front of her son, locked on an estate for nearly twenty-four hours—

And the only time she’d been ready to walk was when he hadn’t been ready to trust her to stay.

He wouldn’t make that mistake again.

“Elizabeth will do whatever’s necessary to make sure Cameron is safe,” Jason said flatly. “I already talked to her about it. I think you’re wrong. I think Mateo knows exactly what the hell is going on and isn’t telling us. You should think about why that’s a problem—”

“Jase—I know he’s lying to us. I’m just not sure it’s our problem to solve. He needs to get his boys under control, but if it’s an internal power struggle, it’s really not our business—”

“They’re having this fight out in the open, Sonny,” Jason retorted. “They’re dealing at the high school, pushing in at Kelly’s and Luke’s—and they just shot up a park in broad daylight!”

Sonny exhaled slowly as if he was trying to find the patience to deal with a tantrum, and Jason narrowed his eyes. “Okay. So we make it clear to Mateo he needs to get the boys under control. We’ll take care of Santiago ourselves if he doesn’t clean it up. But beyond that? This is the same fight we’ve been having for months. Do you want to go to war with the Escobars? Is that it?”

“No,” Jason said after a long moment. “Fine. We’ll give Mateo the chance to fix things. But they’re getting bolder. This time, it was a cop that we don’t give a damn about—next time—”

He shook his head and pushed past Sonny to head to the parking lot. Jason was done arguing with Sonny. He wasn’t going to change his mind, and Jason knew he was going to have to deal with it on his own.

Greystone Manor: Living Room

Carly and Elizabeth were waiting for them when Sonny and Jason returned to the state. Carly stood up from the sofa, crossed her arms, and arched her brows.

“I don’t need any details. I just want to know if me and the boys are safe? Can we go?”

“Uh, yeah, you can go.” Sonny grimaced. “Thanks for this, Carly. I know you hate it.”

Elizabeth looked at Jason and Sonny. “That goes for me and Cam, right? We’re okay?”

“You’re okay to leave,” Sonny said before Jason could say anything. “Why?”

She didn’t answer him but looked at Carly instead. “I need to go by the apartment to pack a few things,” Elizabeth told her. “And I don’t want Cameron somewhere where Lucky might…” She sighed. “My grandmother might let Lucky see or even take Cameron. I hate to ask you, but could you watch him for a few hours? I can pick him up later—”

“Sure. I get it. I’ve been through a messy divorce or two.” She eyed Sonny. “Or three.” Carly shrugged and went upstairs. Sonny scowled, then followed her.

Elizabeth looked at Jason, who didn’t look as relieved as she might have expected upon learning that they were safe to leave. “What’s wrong? Do you not want us to go?”

“No, it’s not—” Jason rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m not satisfied with Mateo’s explanations.” He walked closer to her, dropping his voice slightly. “He said his nephew was behind it. That there was some kind of mistake about a customer. He said it had nothing to do with me or Sonny. I believe that. I just don’t think he was telling us everything.”

“Okay.” Elizabeth waited a minute, but he said nothing else. “Jason, do you want me to stay here another night?”

“No, no. I just—” He shook his head, sighed. “Sonny doesn’t feel the same way, and we’ve already had an argument about it. Carly wasn’t at the park, and they’re divorced, so it’s simple for him.”

He shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “You were shot at. I don’t know why they’d be shooting at you, but I didn’t realize until it was too late that Manny was after you. I just don’t want to make the mistake and think things are okay if they’re not—”

Elizabeth bit her lip. “Why don’t Cam and I come to the penthouse? We’ll stay the night, and maybe you’ll feel better about everything tomorrow. I don’t want you to worry about me, and I don’t want to take any chances either—I want to make sure Cameron is safe.”

“You can stay in the guest room,” Jason said immediately. “I was going to ask you to come stay with me, but I didn’t want it to feel like I was assuming anything or—I don’t know—that it might make you think about the last time you were there—”

“That was four years ago. I also know how to say no, Jason.” She managed a smile. “And I know you know how to hear it. But I meant it about needing some things from my apartment. I really just went to my grandmother’s with a few things. So, let me call Luke or Bobbie, and make sure Lucky is with one of them. Is it okay if Carly still takes Cam with her?”

“Yeah, yeah. They’ll have the guards at their place just like usual.”

“Okay.” Elizabeth paused. “Thank you. For being honest with me about this.” She pressed her hand to his chest, over his heart. He covered it with his own. “It means a lot to me that you’ve listened to me.”

“I don’t want to make the same mistakes again.”

“We won’t.” She kissed his cheek. “I’ll go get my things together and let Cameron know the plan.”

Port Charles Municipal Building: DA’s Office

Alexis Davis grimaced as she checked the list of voice mails she had, her head down as she walked through the entrance of her suite. “Ronnie, hold my calls,” she barked to her secretary. “I have a meeting with the mayor in an hour and Mac still doesn’t have any news on the shooter in the park—”

“Uh, Ms. Davis—” Her secretary cleared her throat and stepped in front of Alexis’s office door, forcing the district attorney to look up and focus on her. “Um, someone says they need to meet with you and won’t leave until you do.”

Alexis frowned and turned away to look at the woman sitting in one of the armchairs in the waiting area. “What are you doing here?”

Sam got to her feet and folded her arms. “I have a few things I need to ask you about.”

Alexis sighed, impatient, really not in the mood to be accused of whatever was going wrong in Sam’s life this week. “Make it quick. I have a meeting—”

“With the mayor, yeah, I heard.” Sam arched a dark brow. “You’re very important. But I think we might want some privacy for this.”

Alexis rolled her eyes and looked at her secretary. “Give me ten minutes.” She turned back to Sam. “Let’s ago.”

When Alexis’s door was closed, and the two of them were alone in her office, Alexis dropped her briefcase on the desk and looked expectantly at Sam. “Well?”

“Well, Natasha…” Sam tilted her head to the side. “That’s your real name, isn’t it? Natasha?”

“Common knowledge—”

“Well, Natasha, I’d like to know who my father is,” Sam told her. “Since the birth certificate on file with the state of Maine says unknown. Oh, and did you even bother to name me before you threw me away?”

Lucky & Elizabeth’s Apartment: Living Room

Elizabeth opened the door and stepped inside, followed by Jason. She was nervous about being back here, not having been inside she’d left on Friday. According to a quick conversation with Bobbie, Lucky was at the police station and would be there most of the day.

She realized now that she’d forgotten just how the apartment looked before she’d left on Friday—or that it could look even worse. The table next to the sofa had been turned over, the coffee table had been flipped, and one of the legs was broken.

Cameron’s toys had been strewn all over his room. She dimly remembered now that Lucky had thrown the toy organizer across the room, scattering toys everywhere. But now—she realized he had come back into the room at some point and continued the rampage.

Elizabeth stared at the destruction of her son’s room, of the space she’d given her little boy to feel safe and happy, and wanted to weep all over again for the choices she’d made.

Jason drew in a sharp breath—likely remembering Cameron’s careful pride in his toys. Some of the action figures had been stomped on and broken into pieces—including one of the race cars he’d shown Jason that night.

Jason knelt down to pick up pieces of the plastic. He turned them over in his hands, then looked at Elizabeth. She just closed her eyes, praying he wouldn’t ask what he must be thinking.

“Let’s put the broken ones aside,” Jason said finally. “W can replace them. Maybe I can do that before he knows they’re gone.”

Elizabeth wanted to argue with him, but God, he was doing it for Cameron. And that was the most important thing. She just nodded and knelt beside him, and they started to sort the toys back into the containers. She’d planned to just bring some of his favorites and come for the rest later, but—

If she left them here again, how did she even know they’d be here the next time?

“I’ll take them down to the SUV,” Jason told her. “There’s not that many containers. I can do do it in a few trips. Or, if you want, I can get a few guys with boxes. We’ll get everything cleared out today.”

“I—” Her throat was so tight, she almost couldn’t breathe. “I want to say no,” she said finally. “But I can’t. Yeah. Can you do that? I don’t care about my stuff, but Cameron—these are his—” A tear slid down her cheek. “Oh, God.” She pressed her hands to her face. “What have I done—”

“It’s over now,” Jason told her. He drew her to her feet. “It’s over. You’re leaving. Right? You’re not coming back. So don’t focus on that anymore. Let’s get things packed. I’ll go call Cody. They’ll be here in ten minutes. They can just grab some boxes from the warehouses, and we’ll store it wherever you want.”

“Okay. Okay. Thank you.” She managed a smile. “Thank you. For caring about his things as much as I do. I need to replace them. I might have to borrow money or—” When he just stared at her, she laughed lightly. “Right. Stupid. But thank you. Knowing that you love my little boy is just—it makes this easier.”

“He’s easy to love.” He kissed her forehead. “Keep packing. I’ll call Cody.”

He stepped into the living room while Elizabeth finished packing Cameron’s toys back into their plastic containers. Then she started to sort through his clothes, stacking them so they could easily be put into boxes. When Cameron’s things were organized, she moved on to the dresser she kept in the bedroom.

She put her own clothes into piles on the bed, setting aside things to take to Jason’s and others to leave for her grandmother’s. When she was done, she started to lift her jewelry box from the top of the dresser—then stopped as her wedding ring flashed in her face.

Elizabeth stared at it, then yanked it off her finger. She nearly threw it across the room, but then thought better of it. She could always sell or pawn it later. She lifted the top of the jewelry box—then just stared.

It was nearly empty. All that was left was some of the costume jewelry that she wore on an everyday basis—anything valuable was missing. The bracelet her grandmother had given her, a pair of earrings her parents had sent one year for her birthday, a necklace—

“Elizabeth—”

“My jewelry is gone,” she said softly. She turned to look at Jason, stunned. “Everything that was worth more than twenty bucks.”

Jason swallowed hard, then walked forward. “When was the last time you saw it?”

“Thursday, before I left for work,” Elizabeth said. She dropped her wedding ring in the box. “I wear this necklace—” She pressed her hand to her chest, picking up the thin gold strand with her thumb. “My grandmother gave it to me for my last birthday—” She closed her eyes. “Why would he take them?”

“I don’t know,” Jason said. “Maybe—maybe Luke or Bobbie could find out for you.” There was something in the tone of his voice that made her look at him with some hesitation. “Cody is on his way. He’ll be here in ten minutes with two other guys. He’s bringing a van in case you want to bring anything else that won’t fit in my SUV.”

“We should get packing.” Elizabeth set the jewelry box back on her dresser and went to her closet.

She never wanted to come back here again.

Port Charles Municipal Building: DA’s Office

Alexis swallowed hard as she stared at Sam. “I’m sorry,” she said. “Could you—” She took a deep breath. “Could you start from the beginning?”

“Never mind—this was a terrible idea,” Sam muttered. She didn’t know why she was here—why she had taken Elizabeth’s advice—

She’d been arranging her plane ticket out of Port Charles this morning and was just struck with a desperate urge to know why she’d been given away. She had thought Alexis would deny it, that she would even refuse to see her—that she’d do something other than look at her with a devastated expression.

She turned and started for the door, but Alexis rushed past her, flattening herself against the office door.

“No. No.” Alexis just stared at her. “No. There must be a mistake. Mikkos—he took you—and I looked—I looked, but they said you’d died. I looked. There must be a mistake.”

Sam took a step back, shook her head again. “What are you talking about? The records were right there. I mean, we had to hack into them because Maine refused to tell me anything legally, but—”

“I—” Alexis raised a hand in the air, curled it into a first. “Just give me a second. My head is spinning. I—” She took another deep breath. “I was sixteen. I was in a girl’s school in Vermont, and I’d snuck out for the night a college bar. I didn’t know the boy very well. I don’t even—” Her cheeks flushed. “I didn’t get his last name, but his name was Julian. He was very sweet, and we were both very drunk. I never saw him again. I got caught sneaking out, and Mikkos moved me to a stricter school.”

“Okay.” Sam folded her arms, lifted her chin. “So he forced you to give up your kid for adoption. But he died like eight minutes later, so—”

“He did. But you don’t know what Mikkos Cassadine was like—” Alexis shook her head. “You don’t know what Helena was like. Not really. She killed my mother. I hid my sister away to protect her. That’s why I became a lawyer. I thought I could be in charge then. After I graduated from law school, I went to Maine. I tried to find—I find to find the clinic, the agency, but it was all gone. Mikkos had created both just to hide everything—and then had closed them as soon as the baby was—”

Alexis’s voice trembled. “But I looked, Sam. I looked anyway. And they told me that my little girl had been adopted into a family and had died at the age of seven in a car accident. I was devastated. I never—I don’t know if there was a mistake or if Mikkos put something in the system in case I ever tried to look—”

“Well, there’s no mistake now,” Sam muttered, looking away from the shattered look in the older woman’s eyes. “Jason had his suspicions when we were told my mother’s name on the birth certificate was Natasha Davis. So he ran a DNA test behind my back.”

“A DNA—” Alexis closed her eyes. “Oh, God, you must have been horrified. I know how you feel about me.”

“Well, you don’t think much of me either—”

“It’s—” Alexis shook her head. “Sam, none of that matters now. I just—” She pressed her lips together. “I didn’t know your father, but yes, you had a name. I named you for my mother. Kristin. In my head, I always called you Kristie.” Tears were sliding down her cheeks as she laughed. She pressed her hands to her cheeks. “That sounds silly now, doesn’t it? Can you imagine growing up as Kristie?”

Sam’s chest was tightened. “Yeah, maybe. I’ve seen you with Kristina and Molly, so maybe I can imagine what it might have been like to have a mother.” She squeezed her eyes shut. “This isn’t going the way I wanted it to.”

“Sam—”

“You’re not my mother. This isn’t—” She huffed, looked away. “I’m not looking for a family. I’m not looking for sisters or a mother. And definitely not a stepfather.”

“I get that—”

“I only—” Sam threw up her hands. “I only came because I’m leaving Port Charles, and I guess I just—someone told me not to leave anything unfinished. Now I think I should have told her to mind her own damn business.”

“Please—don’t—don’t go—”

But Sam reached past Alexis and tugged open the door. “Have a nice life—”

“Don’t go—”

But Sam had already left, leaving her mother in tears.

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

“Thanks for letting me use the storage space here at the Towers,” Elizabeth said as Jason closed the door behind him. “And I guess it’s a good thing that Cam wanted to sleep over with Morgan again. Do you think I’m wrong for letting him? He’s spent so much time at Carly’s this week—”

“I think it might be easier for him there,” Jason said slowly, “than having to sleep in another new place tonight. He loves Morgan’s house, and he’s comfortable there. You’re not wrong to let him.”

“I guess. Maybe I should be concerned that my two-year-old has no problems sleeping in a house without me.” Elizabeth sighed and rubbed her cheeks, her eyes aching from crying again. She just wanted to be done with the tears. “I want to be with him, but you’re right. Another new place would be hard for him. And Morgan has a playroom that’s bigger than our apartment.”

“You’re a great mother,” Jason told her. He put his hands on her shoulders, rubbing them slightly. “You’ve raised a great, funny kid who’s comfortable around people he knows he can trust. And he’s starting nursery school in the fall, isn’t he? He’ll be socialized and ready.”

“You always know how to make me feel better,” Elizabeth said, her chest relaxing. “Thanks. You’re right, of course.” She sighed. “I’m just—” She shook her head. “I don’t know. It’s been a crazy forty-eight hours.”

“It has—”

The phone rang on the desk, and Jason answered it. “Hello? Hey, Walt. Yeah, okay. Yeah, that’s fine.” He put the phone down. “Robin’s on her way up.”

“Robin?” Elizabeth frowned. “How did she know I was here? I was going to call Emily, but—”

There was a knock on the door a few minutes later, and Robin smiled sheepishly when Jason pulled it open. “Hey, I hope it’s okay that I popped over. I ran into Bobbie at GH, and she mentioned you were staying here tonight. I managed to stop Patrick and Emily from rushing over and bombarding you.”

“Oh.” Elizabeth nodded, still a bit confused. “Yeah. I guess that makes sense. Um—”

“I wanted to check in with you. Because, you know, I talked to Emily. And I know what’s been happening.” She pressed her lips together. “And because of Jesse.”

“Oh,” Elizabeth repeated. “Oh, I’m so sorry. I’ve been thinking about Maxie. How are you all holding up?”

“I’m okay. I didn’t know Jesse well, and well, you know we didn’t get along, “Robin admitted. “But Maxie is devastated. Felicia and Georgie are with her.”

“I’m gonna let you guys talk,” Jason said. He hesitated, looking at Elizabeth. “I need to go check on a few things. Cody will be downstairs if you want to go out.”

“I wasn’t planning on it since I’m off today, but thanks. I’ll see you when you get back.” She watched him leave before looking back at Robin. “I guess you’re really here because Bobbie said I left Lucky.”

“Emily told me that last night. We were talking about what happened,” Robin said. “And she said Jesse was fighting with you about Lucky, about you being at the park with Jason. And I guess—I don’t know—I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“I am…” Elizabeth stopped, thinking about her answer. “I don’t know. But I think I’m getting there.”

She moved to sit on the sofa, and Robin followed her. “I went home on Friday morning after my shift, and he was already—he was already out of control. I don’t have any bruises to show for it, but he grabbed my wrist, he pushed me into the wall again—” Elizabeth rubbed her face. “And I just—I knew I had to be done. Part of me had already walked away weeks ago.”

“I’m sorry you went through that. I’m glad you’re standing in front of me now.” Robin pursed her lips. “But this is the most dangerous time, you know that, right? After leaving. Have you talked to Jason about this yet?”

“I wasn’t going to,” Elizabeth admitted. “I thought maybe I could hide it. Everyone would think we’d divorced over Jason or Lucky’s job, or something else. I almost think I’d rather they think I’m unfaithful than the truth.” She laughed bitterly. “I guess I am technically unfaithful with everything that’s happened with Jason.”

“Elizabeth—”

“I wasn’t going to,” she repeated. “And then Jason and I had this stupid argument we’ve been having since the second we became more than friends. He wanted to talk to me about safety. He wants me to be safe. And I just—safe, Robin. Was I safe with Lucky? I mean, if I’m not safe being married to a cop—” She threw up her hands. “When am I supposed to be safe? What does that even mean?”

“Not much, I guess, from your perspective. Elizabeth—”

“I’m not ready to jump into anything with Jason. Not—not officially. But we both know it’s something we want. And I just—I guess I think I might need to him understand why this is a risk I’m willing to take. Because every time he decides I should be safe with someone else, I just end up miserable.” Elizabeth sighed. “I don’t want to be safe if it means I’m unhappy. Why can’t there be something in the middle?”

“I don’t know if there can be. And I don’t know what’s going to happen with Jason, but I think you should tell him what you’ve been through. Because you need to tell the people that matter. I mean, Patrick and I matter, sure,” Robin said before Elizabeth could protest, “but not the way Jason does. Not the way Emily does. And not the way your grandmother does.”

“I—”

“Because as long as you don’t tell the people who you love the most—the people who are your family—you’re still hiding it, Elizabeth. And hiding it means you’re not dealing with it.”

“I know.” Elizabeth sighed. “I almost told Jason last night. I wanted to tell him today. But we went to the apartment, and Lucky had busted up Cameron’s room. He broke some of his toys—”

“Oh, Elizabeth—”

“Jason just looked at them—he knows how much Cameron loves those toys—and he didn’t look at me with any kind of disgust or blame for going back to Lucky. He just—he just wanted to sort the broken ones so they could be replaced before Cameron knew they were gone. He loves my son, Robin. And I—we haven’t said it—but I think we love each other. And maybe it’s insane, but I don’t care about the rest of it. Because that’s what’s important.”

“Then be honest with him,” Robin advised. “And put Lucky in the past where he belongs.” She took Elizabeth’s hand in hers. “I think maybe you file a police report with my uncle. He’ll listen.”

“Would he? He didn’t after the kidnapping—”

“He will when you show him the pictures I took before Manny kidnapped you. He will when I back you up.” Robin nodded. “I’ll bring you the pictures. Just—just think about it. Because leaving Lucky—that’s important. That’s the hard part, I know, but the scary part comes now. When Lucky realizes you mean it. He already broke your son’s toys. You need to make a report—even if it goes nowhere—because it needs to be on the record.”

“I’ll—” Elizabeth managed a weak smile. “I don’t know if I’m ready for Mac. But I think—I think I do need to tell Jason. And Emily and my grandmother. I need to stop hiding and pretending it will go away.”

The world’s on fire, it’s more than I can handle
Tap into the water, try to bring my share
Try to bring more, more than I can handle
Bring it to the table, bring what I am able
I watch the heavens but I find no calling
Something I can do to change what’s coming
Stay close to me while the sky is falling
I don’t wanna be left alone, don’t wanna be alone
– Worlds on Fire, Sarah McLachlan

---

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Greystone Manor: Living Room

Inside the house, Sonny and Carly were waiting. Sonny sat in his armchair, a bourbon in his hand, Michael was on the sofa playing a handheld video game while Carly was pacing from the terrace doors to the double doors, back and forth.

As soon as the gunshots had been reported by the news, Sonny had called Carly for a lockdown at the estate. She’d gone without an argument. It didn’t matter how long they had been divorced—she knew the procedure. Jason was with Morgan, and if he was okay, he’d be coming there as possible. She just wanted to be with her boys.

Morgan started crying almost as soon as Jason and Elizabeth crossed the threshold. He released Elizabeth’s hand and ran across the room so that his mother could sweep him up into a bear hug.

Sonny launched to his feet to join mother and son. “Hey, kiddo,” he said, running his hand down Morgan’s back. “You okay?”

“I ‘kay, Daddy.” Morgan sniffled. “Scared. Big ‘splosion.”

Jason exhaled slowly. “Sonny, I need you to get Richie here. Elizabeth was grazed, and we didn’t wait for the paramedics—”

“Oh my God, you were hit?” Carly looked at Elizabeth over Morgan’s head. “Is Cameron okay? What happened?” She looked at the other toddler, who had tucked his head into the space between Jason’s shoulder and neck , his cheeks tear-stained. “Cam, it’s Aunt Carly. You okay, baby?”

“Yeah,” he offered in a small voice as he looked suspiciously at Sonny. “Jason squished me. Morgan okay, too. Mommy squished him.”

“Mommy—” Carly’s face paled as she took in Elizabeth’s blood-stained bare arm. Jason was pushing her towards the sofa where a silent Michael just moved over. “You—got—you got shot with Morgan—” He set Cameron down next to her.

“It was just the sides of the table we were on,” Elizabeth murmured as some of the adrenaline began to wear off. Her knees felt like they were made of water, and she gratefully sat down. “We had gone to the food court to get something to eat, and—I just grabbed Morgan and went under the table.”

“Thank you,” Sonny said in a quiet voice. “I’ll go get Richie.”

Cameron tucked himself against her good side. “Mommy, does it hurt?”

Morgan perched on one hip, Carly came around to stand next to Jason. “What the hell is going on?” she demanded. “I thought Sonny said things were quiet—”

“They are. We don’t know what happened.” Jason rubbed the back of his neck, watching as a pale Elizabeth reassured her son. “Jesse Beaudry was hit. Headshot.”

“Beaudry,” Carly repeated. “That’s a cop, right? Was he near you?”

“He was at the table, yelling at Elizabeth,” Jason muttered.

“Well, maybe it was because of him,” Carly said. She pressed her lips to Morgan’s cheeks again. “Hey, baby. Talk to me. You must have been scared.”

“It was loud,” Morgan said in a small voice. “And the angry man was bleeding. Aunt Em tried to help, but I think he hurt real bad.”

“Elizabeth,” Carly said, turning back to the sofa. “Why don’t I take the boys upstairs to get settled? You can get cleaned up.” She sighed. “I brought a bag with a few changes of clothes. I didn’t know how long—but you can borrow something from me if you need it.”

“Thanks,” Elizabeth managed. To Cameron, she said, “Do you want to go see Morgan’s playroom? Maybe Aunt Carly—” the words fell a bit more naturally from her lips than she thought they might—“can get the Spiderman DVD from my bag.”

“Wanna stay wit’ you.” Cameron wrapped his arms around Elizabeth’s forearm and pressed his forehead against her shoulder.

“Well, Sonny and Jason are going to get someone who can clean my cut, Cam. And make sure it’s okay.” She pressed her lips to his head. “Go upstairs. I bet the playroom here is bigger than Aunt Carly’s.”

“It’s two rooms, Cameron,” Michael told him with a reassuring smile. He got to his feet, held out his hand. “Come on. We got lots of movies to watch. And Mom always has candy in her purse.” He was clearly a pro at this, and beyond the lack of color in his face, didn’t seem all that fazed by what was going on.

“Thanks for ratting me out, Mr. Man,” Carly muttered as Sonny returned in time for that last remark. “Sonny, I’m taking the boys upstairs.”

“Yeah, yeah, Richie’s on his way up from the guardhouse.” Sonny scrubbed his hands over his face. He waited until Carly had disappeared up the stairs with all three boys before turning back to Jason and Elizabeth. “Justus is on his way over. He’s already fielding calls from Mac. Seems like they know you were there, Jase. It’s only a matter of time before you get an official request to come in for questioning.”

Jason grimaced. “Any word on Beaudry? What about other injuries?”

“A few other bullet grazes,” Sonny said as a guard came in and sat down to look at Elizabeth’s arm. He pulled out a bag and started to unpack a few things. “But Beaudry is the worst. He’s still in surgery, but the guy at the hospital didn’t think it looked good.”

“That’s what Emily said on the scene,” Elizabeth offered, wincing as Richie carefully began to clean the wound. “But he made it to the hospital.”

“Can you guys tell me what happened?” Sonny asked. “Were you the target? How close were you to Beaudry?”

“It’s like we said. We were at one of the picnic tables,” Jason said. “Beaudry and some of the other kids he hangs out with were right there. The shots started, and Elizabeth and I just grabbed the boys and went for cover.”

“I was standing closest to Jesse,” Elizabeth murmured. “With Morgan. On one side of the table. Emily was next to me. Jesse was right in front of me.” She met Sonny’s eyes. “Jason was at least three feet away.”

“That is interesting,” Sonny mused, “and something to think about.” He eyed Jason, who pressed his lips together. “Richie, how does it look?”

“Just a superficial wound,” the guard told Elizabeth as he placed a bandage over it. “It bled a lot, but that serious. You won’t even need stitches. Might be some skin discoloration, but it’ll probably disappear with time.” He packed his things up. “You’re a nurse, right? You know to clean this if you have supplies?”

“Yeah, thanks.”

When Richie left, Elizabeth sighed. She knew Sonny probably wanted her out of the way, so she got to her feet. “I should call my grandmother to let her know we’re okay. Can I tell her where we are?”

“Yeah, yeah, that’s fine. But if it’s okay, Elizabeth, I’d like you and Cameron to spend the night. To make sure we know who the target was.” Sonny hesitated. “I’m…kind of concerned that Beaudry was the hardest hit, and he was next to you. I don’t know what that means, but you—” He looked at the remains of the blood-stained sleeve in her hands. “That bullet came close to my son, and he’s okay because you took care of him. Thank you.”

“You’d do the same for mine.” She looked at Jason. “I’ll go and call her. I’m sure you and Sonny have things to talk about that I don’t need to hear.”

“Yeah.” Jason looked at her for a long time as if he wanted to say more as if he wanted to do something. But he remained rooted to the ground, not moving towards her. Elizabeth just sighed, shook her head, and went upstairs.

“I called Mateo,” Sonny offered once Elizabeth was out of earshot. “He doesn’t know what the hell is going on. This isn’t from him.”

“That doesn’t mean it’s not from the guys he can’t control,” Jason muttered. “Something isn’t right about this, Sonny. There were two shooters—they both got away because I couldn’t—the kids were there—”

“I didn’t think you should abandon Elizabeth and Emily with toddlers so you could go get shot by someone else,” Sonny said dryly. “You did what needed to be done. The kids come first. Two shooters?”

“Unless the guy had a machine, definitely more than one shooter. But opening fire on crowded carnival?” Jason shook his head. “I don’t think the shots were coming from far away. A decent shot would have taken me out—I wasn’t expecting any trouble. But I didn’t even get grazed. Elizabeth did. And the cop took the full brunt.”

“You think Beaudry was the undercover working Courtland Street?” Sonny asked. “Maybe we weren’t the targets?”

“I don’t know.”

His partner frowned at him. “Are you sure you’re not just hoping it wasn’t about us?” Sonny asked. “You’re out in public with Elizabeth and her kid for the first time. He ends up in danger—that’s not a good sign.”

“She’s handling it,” Jason said flatly. “Better than most. No, I don’t want this to be about us. Because it means we missed something. We knew there were issues with the Escobars, but this is an escalation that we didn’t see coming. Do you want to admit we missed it?”

“No.” Sonny frowned as the front door opened, and Max shoved open the door to the living room. “What’s up, Max?”

“Uh, Lucky Spencer is at the guardhouse, demanding to talk to his wife and son.” Max winced as he looked at Jason. “I didn’t know what to say to him. He said if I just turned him away, he’d have the PCPD here to come get Cameron. I don’t know if that’s a thing he can do, but I thought Miss Webber ought to know.”

Jason sighed, nodded. “Yeah, I’ll go get her. See how she wants to handle it.”

He went up the stairs and found Elizabeth coming out of one of the guest rooms, her blood-stained tank top exchanged for a long-sleeved shirt that covered her wound. “Hey—I didn’t think you’d be done with Sonny so quickly. I didn’t even get to call Gram yet—” She frowned. “What? What’s wrong?”

“Lucky’s at the guardhouse,” he said after a long moment. “Demanding to see you and Cameron. He threatened to bring the PCPD to get Cameron. I’m sure he threw the words kidnapping around.”

Elizabeth hesitated. “The last thing I want to do is deal with Lucky,” she admitted.

“I’ll make him go away—”

But as Jason turned to go, she caught his sleeve and stopped him. “But I think I should go down myself.”

He frowned down at her, shaking his head slightly. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do—”

“No, I—” Elizabeth pressed her lips together and looked at him. “No, I don’t. But I need to do this. Plus, if I don’t send him away myself, he’ll just make more trouble at the PCPD.”

Greystone Manor: Guard House

Lucky was pacing back and forth in the driveway that led up to the estate, his car parked haphazardly behind him, one of the wheels on the curb.

Elizabeth folded her arms as she approached the gate, Jason on her heels.

“Let me in!” Lucky yelled. He pulled at the gate again, but the iron bars didn’t move. “Damn it! I’m a fucking a cop!”

“Yeah? No warrant, no service,” Max Giambetti shot back with a smirk. “Try again—”

But Lucky had seen Elizabeth walk up behind Max and another guard. His eyes were bloodshot, and she grimaced, wondering if he’d been at Jake’s drinking again. “Elizabeth, you have to come with me!”

“I don’t have to go anywhere with you.” Though the gate was between them, Elizabeth stayed behind the guards. She didn’t want to get within arm’s reach of Lucky—

She didn’t trust him not to grab her through the bars.

“Elizabeth, Elizabeth, you need to be safe—you need to come out here now!” Lucky stretched his arm through the bars. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to do it—”

“I’m safe right where I am,” she said flatly. “You need to go.”

“God damn it—” His scowl deepened, his face flushed even darker as he focused on Jason behind her. “You ran straight to him, didn’t you? You fucking whore—”

“Let’s go back inside,” Jason told her as Elizabeth shook her head. She met his eyes. “He can’t get through the gate without a warrant, and he can’t tell the PCPD we’re keeping you against your will.”

“No, but he can still find a way to make trouble,” she murmured. She looked back at Lucky, at the man that, until yesterday, she’d been trying to save. Her husband. “He always does.”

The boy she loved was gone, and she couldn’t even find a trace of the man she’d promised to love forever, barely six months earlier. It was the first time she could look at him and not feel the choking weight of obligation, guilt, and regret.

She felt nothing.

“Go away, Lucky. And don’t come back.”

She turned and walked back to the house.

Greystone Manor: Foyer

Elizabeth dragged her hands through her hair as she walked into the foyer. Jason closed the door behind them. “Well, that was fun.”

“You didn’t have to go,” Jason told her, cocking his head to the side. “You knew he couldn’t come on the grounds without a warrant. And if the PCPD tried to take Cam, you’re here to stop that.”

“Yeah, I know that—”

“So, why did you go?” Jason asked, his tone quiet, his eyes searching hers. “I would have made him go away—”

“I needed to do it,” she admitted. “And maybe I didn’t even understand that until I went out there and saw him. Yesterday—” She blew out a breath. “Yesterday, he was the one that left. It should have been me. I should have left him weeks ago. I shouldn’t have gone back in the first place.”

Elizabeth bit her lip. “I needed to be the one who left,” she said again, more to herself. Then she met his eyes. “And I think maybe I needed you to know that. To see that.”

“Elizabeth—”

“Because I know the conversation—” She forced a smile on her face. “The argument we’re going to have later—when this is—when things are calmer.”

Jason looked away, and she just sighed. Elizabeth wasn’t sure she had it in her for that particular argument, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t going to happen all the same.

“But I needed you to see that I’m the one walking away from him this time.” Elizabeth’s chest eased. “And I’m not going back.”

Jason nodded. “Okay—”

They both turned when the double doors to the living room opened, and Sonny peered at them. “Lucky gone?” he asked.

“I’m sure he is by now,” Elizabeth said.

“Good. Jase, we got work to do. Elizabeth—”

“Got it.” She looked at Jason as Sonny went back into the living room, the doors still open. “Come find me later when you and Sonny are done talking, okay? We’ll have that argument.”

“Yeah,” he repeated. He kissed her forehead, lingering for a moment. “I’m sorry.”

“Me, too.” She squeezed his hand, then let him go. She went up the main stairs while he closed the doors.

Greystone Manor: Living Room

“She okay?” Sonny asked. He retrieved his forgotten bourbon from the coffee table and offered Jason a drink of his own. Jason didn’t usually drink with Sonny, but this time he accepted. Sonny went to the minibar to pour him a glass.

“She’s dealing. She’s—” Jason hesitated, sipped his drink. “She’s always been good under pressure. And she’s a nurse.”

“Trained to think in a crisis,” Sonny said. “Well, that’s your issue to deal with as long as Spencer doesn’t make any more problems for us.” He was quiet for a long moment. “You think this is any kind of payback for Manny?”

“Who’s left to get payback?” Jason asked. “The only brother left alive is a priest, and Roy said he never had anything to do with the family. We can call down to Miami, but I doubt anyone is missing the Ruiz family.”

“Fair. There’s always Alcazar. He’s in Miami now—”

“He owes me a favor,” Jason said. “And he knows Skye likes Elizabeth. He’s not going after her for Manny. Not after what happened last month.”

“Then I don’t know what the hell is going on. If it’s the Escobars committing suicide by going after an undercover cop, well…” Sonny shrugged. “I’ll do what I can to turn the PCPD towards them. It’d be nice to know if you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

“First time for everything.”

Greystone Manor: Guest Suite

Jason and Sonny stayed holed up in the living room for several more hours as guards came and went to check in. Just after Carly and Elizabeth had fed the boys dinner and put Morgan and Cameron down to sleep, they got the word from the hospital that Jesse Beaudry had died from his injuries.

They’d gone to a guest suite with a bedroom and sitting room attached to it to eat their own food. She’d called her grandmother shortly after Jason told her Lucky was at the entrance, and Audrey had been livid to learn she was at Greystone with no plans to leave.

And now…to learn that Jesse had died…Elizabeth didn’t know what to think. She’d hoped that the worst was behind her, but somehow she knew that his death would only make things worse.

She was tired of thinking she’d hit bottom only to learn there were several levels of hell beneath it.

Carly shook her head as the guard left, having reported the news to them. She crossed to the window that overlooked the main drive leading down to the guardhouse and gated entrance. “The PCPD will be back, probably with an arrest warrant.”

“But Jason wasn’t the shooter. There will be witnesses to that. I mean, I know Maxie is probably too upset, but the others—” Elizabeth grimaced. “But yeah, they’re not going to let this go.”

Carly bit at her nails, staring out the window. “What do you think? Do you think this was about Jason and Sonny?” She turned back to Elizabeth, who was pouring herself a glass of wine. “I mean, this isn’t your first shooting.”

Elizabeth pursed her lips. “No, it’s not. Jason made us both stay at the penthouse when Alcazar shot at me and Zander in the hospital. It was a few days before he’d let me go back to work at Kelly’s, but even then, I had a guard and stayed with him. This isn’t like that. And I guess there was the warehouse fire that year, too. And the kidnapping.”

“Yeah, that was a busy couple of months.” Carly huffed. “This does feel different. We’re in lockdown, but it’s like—do you think it was even about Jason or Sonny?” she repeated.

“I don’t know. I can’t—” Elizabeth sighed. “If it was, they sent the wrong guys to do the job. I think Jason said something in the car about it being more than one guy. They were a terrible shot if Jason was the target.”

“Or you. Your back was to the shooters, yeah? Because Jesse got hit in the head.” Carly started to pace. “They could have hit you. They didn’t. You got grazed, but the cop got shot.” She wrinkled her nose. “The PCPD isn’t going to care about any of that.”

“No, they won’t.”

“Especially since you were there with Jason. Crappy ending to a date, huh?” Carly raised her brows as Elizabeth recognized she was fishing for information. Elizabeth handed her a glass of wine.

“It wasn’t a date, but no, that’s not how it was supposed to go. It was just supposed to be fun. I wanted Cameron to have a good day without me rushing off to work or him going to sleep somewhere else without me. And he loves Jason. I wanted that for them.”

Carly sipped her wine. “And now, you’re remembering why you ran away in the first place.”

Elizabeth rolled her eyes. “Good God, does everyone think I’m some kind of idiot? Carly, the first time I met Jason, he was leaning over Nikolas’s bleeding body because Nikolas got shot standing next to him. I’ve taken care of his bullet wounds. Hid him from people who wanted him dead. I got kidnapped because of him. This is actually the second time I’ve been almost shot standing in the same area as him.”

“Uh huh.” Carly nodded. “But you didn’t have a kid before. And I’m not interested in watching Jason fall in love with a kid only to have you walk away—”

“A little hypocritical coming from you, don’t you think?” Elizabeth asked coolly.

“Starting to remember why I don’t like you,” Carly muttered as she took another sip of her drink.

“Because I have a long memory?”

“Because you are annoying,” Carly said through clenched teeth. “I’m just—Yes. I hurt Jason a long time ago. I’ve been trying to make up for it, okay? So if you’re going to use this as an excuse to run away again, I’d rather you did it now instead of later. Before Jason can get more attached.”

“Not that it’s any of your business, but I didn’t run the last time. Jason shoved me out the door because of the danger. And if anyone walks away because of this, it won’t be me.” Elizabeth sat down. “Can I eat my dinner now, or do you have anything else irritating to say?”

Carly narrowed her eyes, then sat down across from her. “Thank you, by the way. For taking care of Morgan.” With a sigh, “I’m never going to like you, Elizabeth, but you’re a good mother. I know I can trust my boys with you.”

“That might be the first thing we can agree about.”

Blue and red lights flashed through the sheer curtains. They went to the window as Carly sighed. “Well, the PCPD are back.”

“And they got through the gates.” Elizabeth let the curtain fall back in place. She exchanged a troubled look with the blonde because they knew what that meant.

Port Charles Police Department: Squad Room

Jason scowled when he and Sonny walked through the double doors of the room. He didn’t mind the dirty looks from the cops. He’d expected to be dragged to the station once they’d learned Beaudry hadn’t survived the trip to the hospital. He’d been an asshole, but Jason knew a dead cop would only make all of this worse.

No, what he really wasn’t in the mood for was seeing Lucky Spencer and Audrey Hardy standing with Mac Scorpio.

Sonny followed his gaze and sighed. “Well, this should be fun. You think Justus is here yet?”

“You need to send a car out,” Lucky told Mac, his face flushed. He threw his hands up, gesturing at Jason and Sonny. “They’re keeping her locked out there—I can’t see my wife or son—I don’t know if they’re hurt—”

Jason scowled. They couldn’t get a search warrant for the estate, but if Mac thought he had exigent circumstances, they could get onto the property.

“Damn it,” Sonny muttered. He twisted around. “Where the hell is Justus—”

As Lucky continued to rant, Jason watched Elizabeth’s grandmother because he had a bad feeling if she backed up Lucky’s demands, Mac might be swayed. Tempers were running high, and Lucky was clearly irate. But Audrey knew Elizabeth had moved out—

“Tell them, Audrey! Tell them they wouldn’t let me see my own kid!” Lucky growled. “You need to let me get them, Mac! I need to know they’re safe!”

Mac hesitated, looked over at Jason and Sonny with an irritated look, then looked back at Lucky. “Look, I can’t just search the property, Lucky. I need proof that they’re hurt or in danger.”

“Audrey—” Lucky looked at his wife’s grandmother, pleading. “Tell them. You know Elizabeth needs me. She’s making a mistake. She’s not safe there.”

Audrey hesitated, looked at Lucky again, then frowned at him. Jason wished he knew what the older woman was thinking, if she was at all disturbed by the rage shaking Lucky’s shoulders, the trembling of his hands, the fury glinting in his eyes.

This was not a man that Jason wanted near anyone, much less Elizabeth, but Audrey Hardy had always thought any man would be safer for her granddaughter than him.

“If she says yes,” Sonny muttered, “I am not in the mood for this bullshit. I told you not to fuck with a cop’s wife.”

Jason sent him an irritated glare but said nothing.

Finally, Audrey sighed and looked at Mac. “I talked to Elizabeth no less than an hour ago, Mac. She was shaken up, but she said she was fine. She and Jason took Morgan home to be with his parents. The little boy was upset. Elizabeth stayed there because Cameron and Morgan are close, and she wanted them to feel better.”

Jason released a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. He hadn’t expected Audrey to back Elizabeth up, but they’d gotten lucky. For tonight, at least, Audrey had decided to take Elizabeth at her word.

“Finally!” Sonny said as Justus entered the room behind them. “Can you get us out of here?”

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Greystone Manor: Guest Room

It was after midnight before Elizabeth saw the gates open again. She should have gone to sleep hours ago, but she’d hoped Justus would get Jason and Sonny released quickly.

And she wasn’t going to be able to rest until she and Jason were able to talk.

Carly had left her after dinner, leaving Elizabeth to pace the confines of the room, switch the television off and on, getting annoyed every time the news mentioned the shooting and seemed to blame it on Jason.

She’d talked briefly to Emily, to Robin and Patrick, to check on them. She’d gone to check on Cameron, but he and Morgan were snuggled in Morgan’s bed and sleeping like the dead.

She’d sent Jason a text message telling him that she’d wait up to talk to him as soon as he could see her.

Not long after the gates opened, there was a light knock on her door. She pulled it open, relieved to see Jason standing there—even if he looked like he’d rather be anywhere else.

“Hey,” he said as she closed the door behind him. She wrapped her arms around his waist, and he pulled her tight against him—she just wanted to be close to him. To know he was okay. They stood in silence for a long moment. “You okay?”

“Yeah. I was just worried they would keep you overnight. Carly and I knew we had to stay upstairs, but—” Elizabeth sighed, pressing her forehead against his chest. “I hated not knowing.”

“Justus came pretty quickly,” Jason told her. He hesitated. “Your grandmother was there. I think she was waiting to talk to Mac, but—Lucky was there. He was trying to get Mac to come back here and get you.”

“I guess I’m just glad Mac didn’t try—”

“That’s because your grandmother told Mac she’d already talked to you and that you were fine.”

“Really?” Elizabeth raised her brows. “I would have thought she’d want Mac to drag me out of here kicking and screaming—”

“I think Lucky made her uncomfortable.” Jason exhaled slowly. “I also think your grandmother didn’t want you to be in the middle of that.”

He crossed the room to the sitting area, and she followed him. “I appreciate you—that you just did what I needed you to do today. I know you don’t like being told what to do—”

“I don’t, but that wasn’t an ordinary situation. When it comes to my son’s safety, I’ll do what has to be done.” She sighed. “I know you feel guilty about today, but—you never would have gone out with us in the open if you’d thought there might be violence.”

“That’s just it—I can’t ever know—” Jason scowled and sat on the sofa, putting his head in his hands. “I can’t ever know for sure—”

“No one can.” She paused, remembering what she and Sam had talked about earlier. “You’re not Superman, Jason. I keep telling you that.” She sat next to him, pulling his arm down so he’d look at her. “You can’t control the world. You can’t save everyone.”

“I don’t—” Jason stopped, shook his head. “That’s not what I’m trying to do—”

“No? Jason, you and I were at a carnival full of people. Someone took a shot at a cop, and he died. I get why you have to take precautions, but—” She lifted a shoulder. “I think you also have to admit there’s a decent chance this was about Jesse.” Elizabeth winced. “This sounds terrible, but it’s not that hard for me to believe he pissed someone off to the point of violence.”

“Elizabeth—”

She took his hand between both of hers, waiting until he met her eyes. “I know all the things you want to say to me. It’s the same conversation we’ve been having since we met. And my answer is still the same. You’re the one that keeps wanting to choose for me.” Her eyes burned. “You said that you were sorry you’d made that choice for me. You said that. Months ago, when it was about Emily and Sonny, when it was about Sam.”

“I—” Jason just stared at her. “How can you want this? Forget about you. What about Cameron?”

“We’re really back to this.” Elizabeth closed her eyes. Had it only been yesterday that she’d ended her marriage? Was she doomed to repeat the same mistakes forever? She’d gone through the same cycle with Lucky as she had five years ago. Now she was having this conversation with Jason again.

Was Ric next? Was she really that stupid?

“I wish I could wrap my son in a bubble and protect him from the entire world. I can’t. Because there is danger everywhere. Yeah, some of it comes from standing next to you. But it also comes from fire, from car accidents, from illnesses, from people who are supposed to love you—” She broke off as she realized what she was really saying.

Cameron had been in danger every day she’d let him live in a home with an abusive husband. Because one day, Lucky’s anger might have turned to her son. And she’d let it happen. She’d let Cameron watch Lucky hurt her and done nothing.

“I can’t control the world, Jason. I just can’t. All I can do is surround my little boy with love. With people who want the best for him and love him.”

“I do love him,” Jason said in a low voice. “Elizabeth—” He shook his head. “Maybe this isn’t the right time.” He pushed himself to his feet. “I should let you get some sleep—”

She grabbed his arm as he started to walk past her. “I told you yesterday I wasn’t—that I wasn’t ready to go anywhere with this. Not yet. But we need to get this out of the way because I don’t want to push this conversation down the road five more months. I am tired, Jason, of standing in front of you, begging you to love me.”

“Elizabeth—” Stunned, he turned to face her. “That’s not what this is—”

“Then what is it? Why can you take a chance with other women but never with me?”

“I—” Jason swallowed. “I don’t know. I just—” He looked at her arm, where the bullet wound lay hidden beneath the shirt she’d borrowed from Carly. “I don’t want to watch you bleed. I just want you to be safe.”

“Safe,” Elizabeth repeated. She didn’t even know what that word meant anymore. She couldn’t remember that last time she’d felt truly safe. She exhaled. “Fine. Fine.”

“Elizabeth—”

“I can’t do this anymore. I just can’t. Because I’ve told you over and over again—I’m willing to take that risk. And you’re not. Maybe you never will be.” Her chest hurt as she turned away, putting her hands over her face. How many times was she going to do this to herself?

“I’d rather you be alive and hate me than stay with me and get hurt,” Jason said finally. “I can live with that. I need you to be safe. I can’t—” He just shook his head. “I can’t get this right.”

“And what does safe mean?” she asked softly. “Because Manny kidnapped me, went after me—” Elizabeth stabbed a finger at him. “And don’t tell me he only went after me the second time because of you—because he was always going to come for me. And that happened while I was with Lucky. Was I safer then?”

“I—” Jason exhaled slowly, looked away. “No. I guess not.”

“What about the crap I went through with Cassadines—with Helena trying to kill me for years because of the Spencers? Was I safe then? What about Ric? Was I safe then—what the hell does safe mean?” she demanded. “Does it mean alive? Well, great. I’ve been breathing for the past four years. You got what you wanted. I’m safe.”

She stalked away towards the window, dragging her hands through her hair, digging her fingers into her scalp. And he didn’t even know the worst of it.

Would he really be standing here telling her she was safer away from him if she told him about how much Lucky had really hurt her? If he knew about the bruises she’d hidden—the cuts she’d lied about—

“How long do you think I’ll have to stay here?” Elizabeth asked dully.

“We’ll hear back from Mateo Escobar tomorrow,” Jason said. She turned at the sound of his voice—realizing he’d walked up behind her. “He runs a small gang out of Courtland Street. He’s the only one who could have done this, and we don’t even think it’s likely to be him. Not directly.” He sighed. “You’re right. Beaudry was probably the target.”

“Well, he really was an asshole, but I’m sorry that he’ll never get the chance to grow up. And I’m sorry for Maxie. She’ll have a tough time ahead of her.”

Elizabeth turned to look up at him. “I get it, Jason. You don’t want me to get hurt because of you. You don’t want anything to happen to me, or to Cameron. But that’s my choice to make. Not yours. You either respect that, or you don’t.”

“I do.” Jason traced the line of her jaw. “I’m sorry. I keep messing this up. I don’t want you to walk away. I don’t want to lose the chance that, at some point, you’ll be ready. But I won’t apologize for not wanting you hurt. For wanting you to be safe.”

“Then you need to redefine what safe means to you,” Elizabeth told him. She fisted her hands in his shirt. “Because safe shouldn’t mean unhappy. And that’s all it’s ever been to me.”

He leaned his forehead against hers, their breaths mingling as their lips brushed against each other. “Elizabeth—”

“And tonight…I don’t want to be safe.” She slid her hand around the back of his neck to kiss him fully, to press her body against his. His breathing was shallow when their lips parted. “Stay with me.”

“Elizabeth—” His hands, tangled in her hair, tightened a bit, lifting her chin so he could deepen the kiss. “Are you sure—I don’t want to rush you—”

“I’m tired of not taking chances.”

Jason drew back slightly, his thumb brushing the bottom of her lip. His eyes searched hers. The air around them seemed to crackle with electricity as her breath quickened. Elizabeth’s heart pounded an erratic rhythm. He reclaimed her lips, crushing her against him.

They stumbled towards the bed as she clumsily reached for the bottom of his t-shirt. Elizabeth fell backward against the soft mattress. Jason was more careful as he stripped the shirt from her, easing it over her shoulder. He brushed his lips against her bandage, trailing his mouth from her wrist to her shoulder, then to her collar bone.

She wrapped her arms around his neck as he lifted her with one arm, settling her back against the pillows. She couldn’t help but giggle breathlessly as her jeans joined his on the floor.

Jason looked at her with a wicked grin she’d never seen before. “What’s so funny?” he murmured, his breath hot against her neck.

“Just—” Elizabeth moaned slightly as that mouth drifted lower again. “Just that I wish I’d worn something more interesting if I’d—I’d known it was going to be seen by someone else—”

He brushed her hair out of her face, pausing to look at her. “You’re perfect,” he told her in a gravelly, rough tone that sent shivers cascading throughout her body. “Just the way you are.”

She slid her hand around the nape of his neck and pulled him down to her, kissing him hungrily, the way she’d always wanted to, the way she had in all her dreams over the years.

This was what she deserved, and Elizabeth didn’t want to waste a minute of it.