August 20, 2022

This entry is part 38 of 41 in the Mad World: Liberty

In every loss, in every lie
In every truth that you’d deny
And each regret, and each goodbye
Was a mistake too great to hide
And your voice was all I heard
That I get what I deserve

New Divide, Linkin Park


Monday, May 5, 2004

 PCPD: Squad Room

Taggert made sure that Lucky was out on a call when Sonny was due in for the interrogation. Lucky probably knew that Sonny was the suspect, but he didn’t see the point in getting the kid’s hopes up.

Better to tell Lucky and Kelsey together that despite his best efforts, there would be no arrest. Sonny would bring the lawyer, nothing would happen—

And then Sonny Corinthos sauntered into the squad room.

Alone.

Taggert stared at him for a long moment. “Uh, do you want to wait for your lawyer in the interrogation room?”

“No lawyer.” Sonny shrugged. “I don’t have anything to hide and you don’t have anything to scare me with.”

Speechless, Taggert asked a uniform to show Sonny into the interrogation room while he went to get Anna.

She was in her office, picking up files from her desk. “Lieutenant, I was just walking over to observe—” Anna stopped when she saw his face. “Did he not show?”

“He did. Without his lawyer. Says he doesn’t need one.”

Anna blinked. “Are you—are you quite sure—”

“Positive. I’m gonna have him sign a Miranda warning and an official waiver or else Jordan Baines will toss anything we get, but—” Taggert shook his head. “I don’t know about this, Anna. He got out of Ferncliffe with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder. Without a lawyer—can we even say he’s competent to make that decision?”

“I’ll—I’ll get Baldwin on the line,” Anna said, reaching for the phone. “Start recording. I’ll be in the observation room shortly. Question him. If it gets thrown out, fine. But if we can get something on the record—it’s better than what we have now.”

Taggert returned to the squad room, scooped up his files, and snagged a waiver before opening the door to the interrogation room.

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Jason closed his eyes, then opened them, focused on Cameron napping in his bassinet. “What did you just say?”

“I’m sorry, Jase—the car—it was like they knew—Claudia Zacchara put a gun on Bobbie—no way Carly and Elizabeth are gonna—Claudia fucking smiled, man—”

“Get down to the security room now and get me the parking garage feed. Stan and Spinelli will be there in ten minutes.” He hung up, then punched out the number for Edward.

“Jason?” Edward’s confused voice came over the line. “Why are you—”

“Elizabeth and Carly just got kidnapped from the hotel parking garage,” Jason bit out. “I need my guys to have security footage. They’re on their way to security. Can you make sure they get in?”

“What? What? Of course, of course—but—”

Jason hung up on his grandfather, then sent Stan and Spinelli to the hotel, letting them know they’d have full access. He couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe—just had to act. One foot in front of the other.

The phone on his desk rang and he looked at it blankly for a minute, then grabbed it. “What?”

“Jason, Johnny Zacchara is down here—says its an emergency—”

“Send him up,” Jason snapped. He stalked to the doorway, to see if Max was out in the hallway. When he wasn’t, he grimaced then stalked back to the penthouse. Okay, he couldn’t leave Cameron for more than five seconds alone—

Who could he call? Emily was working and wouldn’t be able to just walk out on her shift—damn it, where was—

He dialed another number. “Lulu?”

“Hey, Jase, what’s up—”

“Carly, Bobbie, and Elizabeth were grabbed in the hotel parking garage. I can’t leave the penthouse without someone being with Cameron—” His heart was starting to pound—his brain was starting to catch up with what had happened.

“Lucas and Felix are here—wait—” There was a rustle of voices.

“Lulu, damn it, I don’t have time—”

“Okay, okay, Felix is staying with Morgan, Lucas and I are on our way, and he’s not backing down on that, so don’t argue.” She hung up and Jason turned to find Johnny Zacchara in the doorway.

He stalked across the room, grabbed him and shoved the kid against the wall. “What the fuck is going on?”

“Uh—” Johnny’s eyes bulged. “You tell me, man! I came up here to warn you! What the fuck!”

Jason released him. “Warn me about what?”

“My sister—she’s behind everything. I guess—” He grimaced as Jason released him. “Am I too late? What happened?”

“Your psycho sister just kidnapped my wife,” Jason bit out. “What do you think?”

Johnny swallowed hard. “She was behind the other night. And maybe the bear. I don’t know. I just know she’s coming for you.”

“Damn it.” Jason swung away. Why make another move so quickly? Had she been unhappy Friday didn’t make him do anything right away?

“Would she try to go after me without your father knowing?” Jason demanded, turning back to Johnny who was rubbing his throat. “Would she do this alone to show him that she could handle the business? Is that what this is?”

“No, more like she’d toss your dead body in front of him like a cat tosses a mouse in front of a a bird. To show him she could before she slices his head off. Claudia hates my father. She always has. But she—” Johnny cleared his throat. “She wouldn’t go against him alone. She must have found help.”

Jason stared him for a long moment, and then, like a bolt of lighting jolting through his body, he remembered Claudia’s words the night he’d confronted them in Crimson Pointe.

“Dad got into one of his moods—you might be familiar with them—and choked Ric. We dumped his body and deactivated the ankle thing.”

We dumped his body.

We.

He clenched his fists at his side and closed his eyes.

God damn it.

The yellow bear. The only way Claudia could have known about it—

“Who dumped Ric’s body?” Jason demanded. He looked at Johnny. “The night your father choked him—”

“A couple of the guards—and yeah, Claudia went with them.” He swallowed. “I’m pretty sure she took guards who are loyal to her.”

“Did you see his body?” Jason demanded. “Are you sure he was dead—”

“I don’t know,” Johnny managed. “It’s not the first time my dad went crazy and didn’t actually kill someone he thought was dead. The guards were supposed to put a bullet in his head to be sure. I can’t tell you if my father followed up.”

Jason scrubbed his hands over his face. “Where would she go? Does she have any resources up here? A safe house she could take them to?”

“Who is them?” Johnny demanded. “Who else—”

“Your sister kidnapped my wife, Carly and Carly’s mother,” Jason bit out. “She just signed her death warrant, so if you’re not in the mood for that, you should go—”

Johnny’s face was pale, but he stayed firm. “Let me help you find her. Find them. My family doesn’t need any more blood on their hands.”

Jason’s phone buzzed, and he saw the call from Stan. “I’ll take this—and you better think of anything you know that might help me find my family.”

PCPD: Interrogation Room

 Sonny was getting really tired of people treating him like he was crazy and weak. He didn’t need a goddamn lawyer to talk to the police—he knew how to get through these meetings without saying a damn word.

And he didn’t even have anything to say—not since Jason had locked him out of the business and refused to let him back in—

When Taggert asked him to sign a paper stating he was waiving counsel, Sonny did it with a sneer. Fucking cops thought they were smarter than him.

“What’s this about? You apologizing for those charges you filed?” Sonny demanded.

“Old business,” Taggert said. He flipped open a file. “You, uh, heard about Karen Wexler, didn’t you?”

Sonny sat up then, frowning slightly. “Karen—Karen Wexler?” He hadn’t heard that name in years. “What about her?”

“Died in a car accident about a year ago.” Taggert slid a picture across the table. A photo of Karen the way Sonny had known her. Beautiful, young—

“Didn’t hear that,” Sonny admitted. “A shame. She was a nice kid.”

“Nice kid,” Taggert repeated. “Karen is why you’re here. Some old rumors surfaced about the Paradise Lounge. You remember that place?”

“Uh, yeah.” Sonny cleared his throat. He wasn’t—he wasn’t prepared for this. Hadn’t expected to get questions about Karen. The Paradise. What was the angle? “That place has been gone for a while—”

“Yeah, you leased the land out for another club. I like Luke’s,” Taggert told him. “Great music, good food, cheap drinks. Smart choice. Luke Spencer’s made you some good money down there.”

“I’m not involved anymore,” Sonny said, squinting. “Sold my interest after the fire. The one at the garage.”

“The fire, right. Luke blamed you for it. Shame for you to have lost a place like Luke’s since it gave you a start, but it served its purpose, didn’t it?”

“Not sure I follow—”

“The Paradise was a seedy strip joint with girls who were rumored to be underage and drugged up to work there.” Taggert focused on Sonny. “The blues club is night and day. Just like you. Part of your own image makeover, huh?”

Sonny exhaled slowly. “What’s this about? Why am I here?”

“It’s just a shame about Karen,” Taggert said. “But you know, women around you and their cars—” He shrugged. “Not a lot of luck with that, huh?”

Sonny tensed, stared at him. “Excuse me?”

“I was wondering about Karen’s accident,” Taggert continued. “I guess that’s what made me think about Luke’s. About how you still kept your interest in the club even after that night in the parking lot. Surprised you could go back, day after day, after what happened. But maybe it didn’t matter. I mean, everyone knows you married Lily Rivera for her father’s connections. Maybe he did you a favor when he blew her up.”

Sonny stared at Taggert, then slowly looked past him, swallowing hard as the woman in the light pink dress leaned past the cop, resting her elbow on the table.

Lily smiled at him, as young and as beautiful as she’d been the day she walked away from him—dangling the keys in her hand.

“I told you, Sonny. Everyone knows the truth. You couldn’t protect me. You didn’t care that I was dead. That our son died.”

Sonny shook his head. “No,” he said roughly. “I—I wanted my son. You were—She was—we would have made a family.”

“Maybe. Karen wanted to make a family,” Taggert said. “Nice young woman, you know? Starting out in life. She ever hunt you up to talk about the old days?”

“No. No—” Sonny shook his head. “No. No reason to. The old days were—they weren’t good for her. For me, either. I’m not that man anymore.”

Taggert lifted his brows, surprised. “No?”

“I didn’t—I wouldn’t hurt Karen. There’s nothing to say—no one who could say anything—” Sonny straightened. “I—I made sure of that.”

“Did you?” Taggert leaned forward. “How did you make sure, Sonny?”

He looked past him again, at Lily and now—Karen? Was that Karen standing next to his dead wife?

“Sonny?”

Sonny focused on Taggert, blinked again, and Lily and Karen were both gone. “What?”

“How did you make sure that there was no one who could say anything about Karen?”

Lexington House: Entrance

Carly stumbled as Claudia and another man shoved her inside the entry of the house. She fell into her mother.

“Careful, blondie,” Claudia snapped as she yanked Elizabeth by the arm and held the gun under her chin. “Or I’ll take out your bestie’s wife. You might not like her, but he does, doesn’t he?”

“Just stop—” Carly swallowed hard, looked at Elizabeth’s terrified eyes, not wanting to look at her mother. Oh, God. “I’ll do what you want, okay? We got in the car. We’re in the house. Just don’t—”

Her voice broke. “Just don’t hurt her anymore, okay? We’ll do whatever you want. Whatever you want us to tell Jason—”

“I don’t want you tell Jason anything—” Claudia smirked, kicked the door shut behind her. “You think it’s that easy? I’d think you’d know better after the year you’ve had.”

Carly took a deep breath. Thank God her babies were somewhere else, safe. Jason would have been told by now—he’d keep Michael and Morgan safe. Cameron was safe. The people that mattered most outside of this room.

“When Jason gets his hands on you, he’ll rip you to shreds,” Bobbie hissed. Claudia smiled, started to say something—

And then Carly heard it.

She heard the voice that haunted her dreams, that slipped into her nightmares and whispered to her in the dark that she was never leaving, never seeing her baby—

“If Jason wanted me dead, he should have done it when he had the chance.”

Carly started to tremble, started to shake—and knew who was behind her even if she hadn’t seen the gloss of terror in Elizabeth’s eyes. She turned around and saw that her mother had another gun to her head.

And this time it was held by Ric.

PCPD: Interrogation Room

“Sonny,” Taggert said again. “What did you do to make Karen go away?”

“Nothing.” Sonny shook his head. Had to think. Karen wasn’t important. She was gone. Gone forever. “I didn’t hurt her. Wouldn’t hurt her. I don’t—I don’t hurt women—” But his voice faltered there, and Taggert scowled.

They both knew that was a lie.

“You don’t hurt women. Really?” Taggert nodded with a sarcastic sniff. “What about Carly? You shoved her a few months ago. Locked her in a room in December. Bobbie told me you shoved Elizabeth the same night you locked up Carly. A real prince.”

“I was sick—I didn’t mean it—” Couldn’t think. Couldn’t make it work clear. He was just so tired. Just wanted it all over.

So tired. Sonny blinked. Had to focus. Couldn’t slip up.

He wasn’t weak.

“Sure. What about Brenda, huh? Didn’t put your hands on her, but broke her into pieces all the same, didn’t you?” Taggert retorted. “Cheated on Hannah, didn’t you? We’ve already talked about Lily—”

“Didn’t hurt Lily. I didn’t—”

“And you know what you did to Karen Wexler. Not even old enough to drink, was she? High on drugs you were feeding her—” Taggert asked. “And you killed your mother, didn’t you—”

“No—No!” Sonny’s eyes flared. He shoved himself to his feet. “No! I didn’t mean for her—I knew better—shouldn’t have talked back—shouldn’t have talked back to Deke—knew he’d take it out on her—”

“What?” Taggert shot up. “Don’t you dare—”

“He couldn’t—he couldn’t do it to me anymore—” Wasn’t his fault. Not his fault. Not really. Didn’t meant for it to happen. “Too big to lock up—couldn’t put me in the closet anymore—No one puts me in a closet!” Sonny raged. “He couldn’t hurt me, so he just took it out on Mami—not my fault—never meant—”

He sagged back into his seat, closed his eyes. “She shoulda left with me. Wanted her to leave him.”

Shaken slightly, Taggert sank back into seat. “But you did hurt Karen Wexler. You know you did. Drugged. Stripping in your club. Did you stop it? Did you protect her?”

“No.” Sonny looked at Taggert, weary and worn. “No. I didn’t.”

“You slept with her.”

“Yes.”

“While she was drugged.”

Sonny closed his eyes. “God, yes.”

“Something you had in common with your brother, huh? Is that why you let Ric live? Because he wasn’t any worse than you?”

His eyes flew open and Sonny jerked his back and forth. “No! No! I never—I’m better—I made myself better!” He slapped his hand against his chest. “I made that go away! I made sure no one could say that about me—”

“No one?” Taggert repeated softly. “You mean you made sure Ollie couldn’t say anything?”

“Ollie—” A name he hadn’t heard in a decade. “Ollie. Yes. I made sure Ollie couldn’t tell anyone.”

When Sonny opened his eyes again, Lily and Karen were back, looking at him. Judging him. Karen just sighed and looked over behind Sonny.

Sonny twisted in his chair, his face paling as Oliver Joyce walked towards him, blood trickling down from a bullet wound in his head. He shoved out of his chair. “No! No! I didn’t—”

Taggert frowned, looked around. “Corinthos—who—”

“Why’d you hurt Ollie?” Karen asked, those sad eyes—those eyes he’d wanted to touch, to own— “He just wanted to help.”

“Corinthos,” Taggert said. Sonny focused on him, blinking. The room was empty, and sweat was dribbling down his face. “Take a seat. Let me get you some water.”

Sonny nodded, sat down, and put his head on the table.

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

“Can you take him upstairs?” Jason said as he handed the baby to Lulu. He didn’t want Cameron around this. “There’s a bottle in the fridge—he’ll need it in about any hour. It’s already sterilized, it just needs to be warmed up—”

“I remember from baby sitting Morgan.” Lulu took Cameron in her arms, traded a look with Lucas and Johnny. “I’ll make sure he’s safe. Just bring them home, okay?”

“Thank you.”

“What do you know?” Lucas demanded as his cousin climbed the stairs. “Where’s my mother and sister?”

“We got the make of the car from the security footage,” Jason told him. “But there’s—” He looked at Johnny. “There’s another problem.”

“There always is,” Lucas sneered.

“This isn’t about me,” Jason said, then took a deep breath. Because it wasn’t about him now, but it had started with him. With Sonny. “It’s not about my business, Lucas. His sister,” he nodded at Johnny, “is Claudia Zacchara, and Johnny says she’s not working with her father.”

“Not working—” Lucas frowned at Johnny as if noticing him for the first time. “Who the hell is she working with? What—”

“Ric. She’s working with Ric Lansing,” Jason said.

His shocked eyes swung back to Jason. “He’s dead. You told us he was dead—”

“Because my father supposedly choked him to death,” Johnny told him. “And my sister got rid of the body.”

“The same—” Lucas clenched his fists. “The same sister who just kidnapped Carly, Elizabeth, and my mother?”

“Yeah,” Jason said. “Johnny says she’d never do it alone. Which means Ric is—probably—alive.”

“The man who traumatized my sister—your wife—is alive—and kidnapped them—” Lucas cleared his throat. “Okay. Okay. It’s not going to help if I just repeat what we already know. What now?”

“My tech guy is already looking into anything Claudia owns,” Jason told him. “Are there any aliases she might use?”

“Try anything under my uncle — Dominic Bianco. He was my mother’s brother,” Johnny added. “And raised Claudia like a daughter. Also my mother — Maria Bianco.”

Jason turned away to text Stan those names, waiting like hell for anything to change. He couldn’t run, couldn’t search, not until he knew where to go.

He felt useless, felt helpless. Ric had Carly and Elizabeth again—and Bobbie—and it was Jason’s fault for trusting the Zaccharas, for believing them about Ric.

His phone buzzed with a message from Stan. “A house was bought two months ago on the outskirts of town in the name of Maria Bianco.”

Lexington House: Foyer

“You’re dead,” Carly told him. “You’re dead. They said you were dead—”

“Well, they lied.” Ric smiled at her—that smooth, easy smile that had opened all those doors a year ago. “Now, come into the living room, take a seat, and if you’re really good, I might let you live.”

“That’s a lie,” Elizabeth managed as Claudia shoved her forward. Ric stepped back, keeping the gun under Bobbie’s chin. She and Carly edged past Ric into the living room, Carly desperately trying to keep herself present, in the moment—

Don’t slip away, don’t slip away. Stay in control. Can’t leave them alone. Can’t be weak.

“I have to go,” Claudia told Ric. “Mikey is going to call as soon as Morgan leaves. I’ll get it done and we’ll move on to the next part.”

“Go ahead. I’ll handle it from here.” When Claudia left, Ric looked at them. “Take a seat,” he repeated. “And we’ll catch up.”

PCPD: Interrogation Room

Sonny stared at the glass of water but didn’t drink it. He should leave. Taggert didn’t have anything on him. Nothing except what Sonny gave him.

He’d been so fucking arrogant to walk into this room thinking he had things under control. He should have stopped everything the second he’d looked behind Taggert and seen Lily.

He shouldn’t see the ghosts of the women he’d failed. That was supposed to be over. He was supposed to be better now. Hadn’t he done the therapy? Taken the meds?

But Jason had been right to lock him out. Carly was right to take his kids.

And Taggert was right. He’d destroyed everyone he’d ever come into contact with, and it was time to stop.

“Are you ready to continue?” Taggert asked, taking a seat across from him again. “Or do you want to stop? You can call a lawyer—”

“No.” Sonny raised his eyes, met Taggert’s. “I never killed my mother. Deke told you that, didn’t he?”

Taggert’s mouth tightened. “Yes.”

“He was good at that,” Sonny mused. “Good at convincing people he was some kind of hero. Always taking in kids from the neighborhood. You—” He squinted at him. “You were one of the kids. You saw the other side of him. The side that made my mother stay all those years.”

Taggert exhaled slowly. “We’re not talking about the past—”

“Deke was a monster, and Joe Scully killed him. For me. Because of what he did to my mother. Scully couldn’t handle beating on women. He didn’t care that Deke was a cop.” Sonny wiped at his mouth. “I didn’t kill my mother.”

“Okay. Tell me about Karen. About the Paradise and Oliver Joyce.”

“Ollie was—” Sonny rubbed his chest. “Ollie was a good guy. Shoulda been a DA or something. Always looked out for the girls. Didn’t like the ones that used. I told him to butt out. None of his business. They made their choices.”

“Karen Wexler was already clean and gone—”

“He—he told me she was a friend’s daughter,” Sonny said numbly. “He didn’t know it. Easier to forget her until then. She was just one of many. Ollie never liked it—but it was personal now. Scott’s kid. He knew Scott. Told me he was going to get the Paradise shut down. I—I said okay. I didn’t—I wanted to move on, too—”

“You were plotting with Luke to take down Frank Smith.”

“Yeah.” Sonny closed his eyes. “Not enough for Ollie. Not enough. Wanted me to pay.”

“And you made it go away.”

“Yeah.”

“How, Sonny?”

Sonny looked at him, feeling like he’d been stretched out over a table until his skin had torn. “You know what I did.”

“Yeah, but you gotta say it.”

“I told him I’d come clean, but I needed help. He offered to drive me to the department. Even represent me. Said I’d feel better once it was over. I’d serve a few years, but I could start over. I was young.”

“Sonny.”

“Yeah?”

“You gotta say it.”

“I killed him.” He exhaled in a rush of air, tears leaking out of the corner of his eyes, dribbling down his cheeks. “Shot him in the head.”

Sonny looked at Taggert. “He wanted to take everything from me. Couldn’t let it happen. Couldn’t be locked up. Not again.”

Lexington House: Living Room

Elizabeth and Carly were perched on the edge of the sofa, their eyes locked on Ric who still stood in the doorway, a gun tucked under Bobbie’s chin. Carly had an arm looped through Elizabeth’s, their hands clenched together in a joint fist.

She couldn’t stand this. Couldn’t stand looking at this man, at this walking, living nightmare—watching him threaten the closest person Elizabeth had in this world to a mother—knowing that Carly was in danger next to her—that there was no chance that Ric was letting any of them walk out of the room alive.

Jason thought Ric was dead. Claudia clearly wanted a war with her family and Jason. Elizabeth knew Ric and Claudia intended to be the last people standing at the end. And Claudia was on her way to the Towers, waiting for Jason to leave.

There was only one reason for that.

They were going after her son.

Ric and Claudia were going to make sure the Zaccharas were held responsible for killing the three of them and taking Cameron. Jason would burn Crimson Pointe estate to the ground, with Anthony and Trevor inside.

It was—in fact—a very clever plan.

“Why did you wait so long?” Elizabeth asked softly.

Ric frowned at the sound of her voice, dragged Bobbie a few steps closer. “What did you say?”

“You’ve been out on bail since July,” Elizabeth continued, her voice stronger. She looked at him and realized this was the closest she would ever get to letting him know he hadn’t broken her.

He might end her life, but she was not going down without a fight. Without making sure he knew that she saw him for what he was.

“You knew the Zaccharas thought you were dead. Why wait so long to make Jason think so, too?”

Carly cleared her throat—her voice was wavering when she spoke. “Because it wasn’t just about Sonny. It’s about Anthony. You wanted him dead, too. And if you pushed Sonny enough—”

Ric smirked. “Very good, Carly. Why waste my energy and limited resources when I knew that the slightest thing might send Sonny over the edge and they could get rid of each other and clear my path? But Sonny didn’t crack.”

“And then you found out about the truce,” Elizabeth said. “So you decided to wait until Jason’s guard was down. You knew the security measures. When Friday didn’t work out—” She smiled. “Does Claudia know you set her up to take the fall?”

“No, she’s nearly as dumb as you were,” Ric said. “But women as gullible as you aren’t always easy to find. Claudia thinks we’re going rise from the ashes like a phoenix when Jason and her father destroy each other—” He shook his head, then sighed. “It’ll be sad, but I think part of her will understand when Jason doesn’t let her live. He didn’t let Faith live, did he? He’s an equal opportunity killer.”

“Do you know what I find interesting?” Elizabeth asked. She met Bobbie’s eyes. “How men are always underestimating women. Especially women they think are gullible.”

“Well, if you can find me an intelligent woman—” Ric began—then his hand moved slightly — the tip of the gun away from Bobbie’s chin just long enough—

Then Elizabeth jerked her head. “Now!”

Bobbie stomped on Ric’s foot and jabbed him hard in the stomach—by the time Ric had regained his footing, Bobbie was already diving behind a chair, and Elizabeth had gone for the gun in his hand. She bit hard on his wrist and he yelped, grabbing  for her hair—

And released the gun. She snatched it—and squeezed the trigger three times. Ric dropped to the ground.

Breathing hard, Elizabeth walked towards Ric as he lay on the ground. She watched Ric’s brown eyes as life slid out of them and his chest stopped rising. Elizabeth turned to Bobbie. “Oh, thank God—”

“Elizabeth, watch out!” Carly screamed.

Elizabeth spun around only to see Ric charging for her.

August 19, 2022

Update: Counting Stars – Chapter 4 Excerpt

As I said yesterday, I really wasn’t sure what kind of headspace I’d be in today. Lauren’s service was beautiful, and her dad gave a really beautiful eulogy. He shared some really fun memories, including the night we watched the debate in his basement back in 2012 and how we stayed up until 2 AM at his house for the election. He and Lauren’s mom were always so generous with their homes and their energy, like a second set of parents.

The whole London family came, and that was really special. We’re scattered across a few states now, so unfortunately we only get together for weddings and, now, funerals. The last time we were all together was Ammar’s wedding in September 2020, and Lauren’s in 2016. We went out afterwards and told stories and shared memories most of us hadn’t thought of in years. I’m really blessed to have so many amazing friends and that we can still get together like no time has passed. As good as last night was, we keenly felt Lauren’s absence, and I know we will for years to come.

No flash fiction, but I wanted to post something today. We only have a few chapters left of Mad World, and tomorrow’s chapter has a cliffhanger that I didn’t want to stretch another day, so I’m pulling one of my favorite scenes from Counting Stars. I haven’t edited it yet (and it used to be in Chapter 3), but it’s one of my favorites in this first act. I shared a piece of this a few days ago on Twitter, so it was a good one for today.  Counting Stars will be published starting November 7, with four chapters posted on Mondays until its completion.

This entry is part 1 of 3 in the Previews: Counting Stars

Counting Stars is set in January 2000 and picks up directly after Jason visits Kelly’s to tell Elizabeth they can’t see each other anymore. This scene is from Chapter 4. 


Studio

Elizabeth nearly fell into the room, slamming the door behind her and twisting the deadbolt, her hands shaking so badly that she nearly couldn’t manage it.

She squeezed her eyes shut, pressed the heels of her hands to the sockets so hard she nearly saw stars. What the absolute hell—

The whole, disastrous scene had taken no longer than a few minutes but it was like an earthquake had crashed through, blasting her foundation to jagged rocks. Jason had walked in, and looked at her like—had accused her of—

She’s not Carly.

A lot of pieces were falling into place and Elizabeth didn’t think she liked the picture that was emerging. Sonny had thrown that out like a missile—and Jason—

Is that the only thing stopping you—

The shock was burning off, leaving raw waves of fury. She dropped her hand to her sides and turned at the knock on the door.

He’d come after her.

Slowly, deliberately, Elizabeth crossed back to the door, leaving the shade drawn. She untwisted the bolt and threw open the door.

He was there, tension and frustration radiating from his body as he seemed to tower over her. “Can I come in?”

She almost said no, but she pursed her lips and stepped back, leaving the doorway open. Keeping his eyes on hers, he entered then stood in the middle of the studio, the silence hanging like a bomb waiting to explode.

Elizabeth closed the door, took a deep breath. She could accept whatever apology he was about to give her, and part of her wanted that. Wanted to pretend nothing had ever happened. That it didn’t matter. That it wasn’t about her. It really wasn’t. Not all the way. But it wasn’t enough.

“Elizabeth—”

“No.” Elizabeth turned to face him, an eerie calm filling her senses. Suddenly, she knew exactly what to say. “Even if you’d walked in on exactly what you accused me of—”

“I didn’t—”

“Even if it had been exactly what you thought it was,” Elizabeth said, speaking over him as if he’d said nothing. Jason closed his mouth, his lips forming an unhappy line, “you don’t own me.”

There was a bright stain of red in his cheeks now. “I didn’t—”

“I’m an adult. If I wanted to roll around naked with Sonny Corinthos on his living room floor, that’s my right.”

The flush faded from his face and now he nodded, swallowing hard. “I know—”

“I am not Carly,” she said softly and saw him flinch. “I didn’t scheme for years to make you fall in love with me and then turn around and hurt you. That wasn’t me. And you have no right to take any of what you’re dealing with out on me.” She paused for a second. “That’s what she did, isn’t it? What they both did. It’s why you’re so angry at them.”

“Elizabeth—”

“I thought it might be something like that, but I didn’t ask. It was none of my business. It wasn’t. But you made it my business when you treated me like a slut for being alone in a room with another man—”

“I just need you to—”

“Unless I missed a memo,” Elizabeth continued, brutally, “you don’t get to have a say in who I talk to. You don’t own me,” she repeated. “You’re not my father or my brother—” She forced out the next words, “and you haven’t indicated you want any other relationship that might give you that right.”

“You just need to let me explain—”

“Explain what?” Elizabeth demanded. “Is there something I’ve misunderstood?”

“No.” Jason cleared his throat, dipped his chin to his chest. “No,” he repeated, more softly. “You’ve got it—all of it. It happened that night, and I walked in—” He scrubbed a hand over the side of his face, and some of her anger faded at the misery she saw reflected back, remembering why she’d gone to the penthouse in the first place. “I don’t know if either of them ever planned for me to know, but—” He looked away. “Sonny told me at the boxcar that now I know who both of them are. Like it was some kind of damn lesson he was teaching me—” He paused. “It hasn’t been right since. I’m trying to keep my distance, to get through it. But it’s not working.”

Elizabeth sighed, irritated that she no longer felt that same stirring of righteous fury. “Okay. That doesn’t really explain why you thought—” She should really just drop it. Jason didn’t need to be pushed by anyone else tonight. But she couldn’t quite make it all fit together. There was just a piece of it— “Why did it matter?” she asked softly. And he frowned at her. “Earlier. You were so angry when you came in. But it was just me. Why would you even care?”

He stared at her for a long moment, then looked away. “I can’t answer that,” he said finally. “I’m sorry—”

“You can’t or you won’t?”

“I—”

Elizabeth took a step towards him, their eyes meeting. She took another step. Then another, until there was no space between them, the heat of his body drawing her like a moth to a flame. “Was it just because it was Sonny? Would you have acted that way if he’d been with someone else?”

“No.”

“Then why?”

He closed his eyes, dipping his head, resting against her forehead. Her heart was beating so fast that it echoed in her ears. “Elizabeth—”

“Tell me. Please.”

His thumb brushed her chin, then pressed against her bottom lip. Her tongue darted out to lick it and his body tightened, his hand curved around her neck and then he kissed her. Lightly. Just the touch of skin to skin. Lips to lips. She gripped the lapels of his jacket, tightening her grip as if she could hold him against her forever.

“I couldn’t stand to lose one more thing,” he murmured, and her eyes fluttered closed. “I couldn’t stand to lose you. You’re only piece of my life that makes sense. All that’s left.”

“You won’t,” she promised. She slid her hands up touch his face, to hold him the way she’d dreamed these last few weeks. “You tried to push me away and I wouldn’t go.”

“I don’t—I don’t have anything to give you.” Jason angled his face back, just a few inches so that their eyes met. “There’s nothing left.”

“You’re wrong about that.” Elizabeth leaned up on her toes to kiss him. Nothing quick or soft, but to remind him of everything she could give him. Too many people had taken from him for years. She wouldn’t be like them. She wouldn’t break him. If he could just trust her—just give her a chance—

She pressed herself closer to him, wrapping her arms around his neck, his hands tightening in her hair, tilting her head back, then his hands were at her hips, digging into the skin between the hem of her shirt and her pants. She fisted her hands in his t-shirt, trying to drag it up, a heat building and rising inside that was going to explode if she didn’t find some way to cool off, but she couldn’t find it—

And then there was too much cool air as Jason shoved her away—no, she thought with confusion—she hadn’t moved—he’d shoved himself, and he was by the window, his chest rapidly rising and falling, his face flushed, and the jacket she’d somehow stripped from his shoulders laying on the ground.

“I can’t—” Jason took a deep breath, closing his eyes. “I can’t.”

Elizabeth licked her lips, more from nerves than anything else, but when she saw the way his mouth dropped to her mouth, she perked up. He might not think it was a good idea, but that didn’t mean he didn’t want her.

And what an incredible feeling that was, she thought, with the strangest desire to laugh and smile. To know that someone like Jason wanted her and that she could want, too. She’d been so worried that part of her would never really come back, not all the way. And now it was here, and she wasn’t even scared or worried about what might happen next—

“It’s not you,” Jason said, pained. “It’s not—”

“I know it’s not,” she said softly.

He raked his hands through his hair, leaving it disheveled and—she needed to focus and not think about how she wanted to be the one doing that—

“I’m sorry about earlier,” Jason said. He stooped down to pick up his jacket, breaking eye contact. “You’re right. I don’t have the right to be…” He trailed off. “And even if I did,” he forced out, “I know I can trust you. I do trust you. It was just—”

“The last thing you needed to see today,” Elizabeth said, tilting her head. “Bobbie came by Kelly’s. Carly called her earlier, I guess, hoping Bobbie would take her side.” She paused. “She didn’t. I’m sorry. About what happened with Michael.”

Jason exhaled slowly, then cleared his throat. “I thought it was hard walking away last year. But this time—” He stopped, looked away. He didn’t need to say anything.

“That’s why I came over. To see you.” She stepped towards him, but he circled around her, towards the door, dragging on his jacket. “Jason—”

“I meant what I said. I can’t—” Their eyes met. “I don’t have anything to give you. I don’t have the—” His hand reflexively curled into a fist at his side, his voice roughened. “I can’t.”

And this time, she could believe it. “All right. If that’s what you need from me, we’ll put it away.”

The corner of his mouth quirked up, but it wasn’t a smile. She didn’t know how to describe the mixture of amusement, misery, and irritation in his face. “I don’t know if I can. I don’t know if I can do any of this anymore.”

And then he was gone.

August 18, 2022

Update Link: Watch Me Burn – Part 7 | Mad World, Book 4 – Chapter 112

It feels so strange, knowing that we’re a week away from the end of Mad World. I’ve lived with this project so long, it just doesn’t compute. A reminder that I am doing a read through for typos and continuity errors, so I can create a final set of ebooks (I will also update the chapters on the site), so if you notice any, don’t hesitate to let me know.

Lauren’s service is tonight, and I’ve been asked to speak. I’m not really sure where my head is going to be after this or when I’ll be home tonight, so I’ll just note in advance that Scars might not happen tomorrow. If that happens, I still have one more free Saturday before we go into the fall schedule, so it won’t throw us off that final completion date. I won’t post about it or anything. If it doesn’t go up, I’m not writing.

In more positive news, I’ve been working really hard on my Discovery project, and this week has been a big breakthrough on Fool Me Twice, Book 2. I’ve finished plotting 75% of the book, and just have to finish up Act 3. Then I’ll move into Chapter breakdown. If I don’t write it this fall, I will definitely be tackling it as the next project, so it should be out next summer.

This entry is part 7 of 56 in the Flash Fiction: Watch Me Burn

Written in 57 minutes.


Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Jason was almost relieved to see Elizabeth on the sofa with Spinelli when he returned from Sonny’s that afternoon. He really didn’t know how she transported two children around all the time, especially since Cameron never seemed to stay still for more than ten minutes at a time.

He no sooner pushed open the door then Cameron raced for the stairs and likely the toys upstairs. Elizabeth got to her feet. “I’ll go up and close the gate behind him,” she said. “Otherwise, he’ll ride that bike right down the stairs.”

“Little Dude definitely has the need for speed,” Spinelli said, cheerfully. He set his laptop on the table. “He’s why parents leash their kids.” The smile on the younger man’s face didn’t match the tone of his voice, Jason realized as he lifted Jake from the stroller and crossed the room a playpen that had mysteriously showed up next to the television. He checked the toys and left Jake chewing on the long ear of a stuffed bunny.

“Is everything okay?” Jason wanted to know.

“Uh, yeah. I guess. Maybe. Do you still have that thumb drive I gave you last week? The Jackal requires it.”

Jason frowned, opened the desk drawer and retrieved it. “Did something happen?”

“Faithful Friend and Fair Chelsea had another delivery. Dead roses.” Spinelli’s mouth was pinched as he took the drive and shuddered. “Creepy to the maximum.”

“Did Georgie tell Mac?” Jason asked, leaning against the desk.

“No, but the Jackal will relay that suggestion—” He smiled grimly as Elizabeth descended the stairs. “I, uh, also have some information for you and Fair Elizabeth.” He tucked the thumb drive in his laptop bag. “The Insightful One overheard a troubling conversation while working last week. She didn’t want to get involved, so she said nothing. But she felt as though it should be shared.”

“Spinelli—”

“Detective Dingus and The Departed One were discussing the divorce and custody,” Spinelli mumbled.

Elizabeth drew her brows together. “Detective—”

“Lucky and Sam,” Jason bit out, then focused on the tech. “Discussing how?”

“Uh—” Spinelli rubbed the back of his neck. “Questioning the best way to ensure Detective Dingus maintains his role as the paternal—”

“Spinelli.” Jason knew that the kid was uncomfortable with confrontation, and had always used nicknames and hyperbole to cope with that, but he was running out of patience—

“Right.” Spinelli swallowed. “Georgie didn’t get all the details, but they were brainstorming how to make Fair Elizabeth and Stone Cold look like unfit parents to tank the paternity and custody.”

“They—” Elizabeth’s eyes widened. “Me? Unfit? And Jason—” She exhaled in a heavy sigh. “Okay. Thanks. I’ll let Diane know.”

“Thanks,” Jason added, his fists clenched at his side. Why the hell had Sam decided to weigh in on any of this? It wasn’t her business anymore—

“I’ll, uh, head out. I need to go to PCU.” Spinelli looped the bag over his head and headed for the door. “I’m sorry,” he said. “It sucks.”

“It does,” Elizabeth murmured. She closed her eyes, dragged her hands through her hair. “What is he thinking?” she wanted to know, looking back at Jason. “I know Sam must be angry, but you’ve been broken up for a while now—”

“She knew,” Jason said quietly. “She found out after Jake was born. I didn’t know that,” he added when Elizabeth just stared at him. “Not until Jake was kidnapped. It came out then.”

“She knew Jake was your son,” Elizabeth repeated. “She knew before Maureen Harper kidnapped him.” She rubbed her chest, then laughed—though it was short, choppy, almost bitter sound devoid of humor. “Well, that explains her visit to the house the day after. When she said she wanted to help, and instead—” She sighed. “Never mind.”

“What did she do?” What had Sam said to Elizabeth, knowing where Jake was and who had him? Damn it. He’d thought he was protecting them all by not revealing the role Sam had played, but—

“I think maybe she was trying in the beginning,” Elizabeth murmured. She wandered over to the terrace doors, peering out at the view of the harbor. “Trying to tell me she understood what I was going through. Because of the baby she’d lost. But I was angry. Jake wasn’t dead—I still had Cameron,” she said. “We were the same, the two of us. We’d both lost a child. I could even have another baby. Like Jake could just  be replaced.”

“She—” Jason scrubbed a hand down his face, taking that in. With full knowledge of who had his son, Sam had tried to plant the seeds in Elizabeth’s head. She would never have told the truth. If Maureen Harper hadn’t revealed her part in it all— “I’m sorry.”

“It just—I guess it gives that conversation a different meaning now that I know she knew all along. Maybe she wanted it to be true.” Elizabeth made a face, turned back to him. “That’s not fair. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t—Don’t apologize for her. She doesn’t deserve it.” And now Sam wanted to go after Elizabeth again? Pushing Lucky, trying to get them both declared unfit—

“I can’t believe Lucky really thinks he’s going to go into a court room and point to you as an unfit father,” Elizabeth said with a scowl. “He’s the one with the record of drug abuse. And his affair with Maxie—everyone knew about then when she faked the pregnancy. He did drugs around my son. He can’t win this. It’s impossible.”

“I just got acquitted for murder,” Jason reminded her. “And I’ve got an arrest record—”

“No convictions,” Elizabeth said. “And zero record of endangering kids. I just hate that he’s even considering it. The last thing you and Sonny need is more of this—”

“You let me worry about that.” Jason crossed to her, reached for her hands. “Remember what Diane said. There’s no chance I’m going to lose the paternity suit. And once I’m Jake’s legal father, Lucky’s rights go away.” He hesitated. “And if it looks like it’s going wrong—you tell me how you want this to work out, and I’ll make sure it happens.” He’d get Spinelli working on the family court roster, he decided. There was always something—

“You just got out of jail,” Elizabeth said, but her lips had curved into a smile now because she understood what he was offering. “Let’s just…let’s see what he has to say. Diane is filing today, and we should get something back from Lucky and his lawyer. I just hate that this is happening.”

“So do I. But we’ve got warning,” Jason reminded her. “Diane can prep for any attack on you or me as a parent.” He thought about what Sonny had said, and wondered if Lucky would push too far and lose Elizabeth’s support for joint custody of Cameron. Jason worried if he told her now he’d step up, she might feel guilty enough about everything else to accept the offer even if it wasn’t what she wanted.

Better to wait for Lucky to throw the first punch, because it sounded like he was stupid enough to play dirty.

And Jason had someone else who needed to be dealt with.

Lewis Hall: Georgie & Chelsea’s Dorm

Georgie flopped back on her bed. “You can’t see anything!”

“Well, we can,” Chelsea said, trying to be helpful. “We know he’s not very tall. And he—” She squinted at the figure in the grainy black and white footage. “He likes hats.”

“And long jackets in the summer,” Spinelli said. The same figure had delivered both the fresh roses as the dead ones — but all that meant is that it was some of average height who kept his back to the camera. No face shots.

“You should call your stepdad,” Chelsea told Georgie. “Isn’t it a little weird that he didn’t look at the camera?”

“It could just be a florist delivery. They let delivery guys up to the rooms all the time,” Georgie said. “Maybe this isn’t even the guy.”

“Maybe—”

“It’s probably just some dumb joke.” Georgie studied the vase of the dead flowers on the dress. “The frats are starting early—”

“But—”

“And it’s not like it was addressed to either of us,” Georgie reminded her. “If someone wanted to scare us, why not write notes?”

“I guess.” Chelsea chewed on her lip, looked at Spinelli. “What do you think?”

“I think,” Spinelli said slowly, “that better safe than sorry. Give the Commissioner everything—”

“He’s going to think we’re silly.” Georgie got to her feet and crossed to the dresser. “Maxie is already driving him nuts with Cooper and all that crap she pulled last week. She picked the vase up and dumped it in the trash. “We’re not probably not even the only people that are getting pranked.”

Sam’s Apartment

Jason heard the footsteps behind the door and waited — knowing that she was peering through the peephole. If she didn’t answer the door —

Finally, the tumblers shifted and he heard the locks clicking. Sam opened the door, draping one arm along the edge, the other braced against the frame to block him from coming in. She arched a brow and smirked. “Lonely after all those weeks away?”

“Not for you,” he bit out, and her eyes widened. She fell back a step. Good, he thought. He’d been too kind to her, felt too guilty about the fact she couldn’t have children, that he’d kept the truth about Jake from her — but he wasn’t going to let her push him around for the rest of his life in return.

While he knew her medical issues were ultimately because of her connection to him, he reminded himself that Sam had known the risks of being around him. She’d chosen them. And she’d chosen to watch as his newborn son was kidnapped. Chosen to keep that knowledge to herself. Chosen to torment Elizabeth with thoughts of Jake’s death—

He was done with the guilt.

“What do you want?” Sam demanded.

“If you want to talk about this in the hallway,” Jason said, “we can do that. I’m thisclose to calling Diane to tip off the police that someone else was part of Jake’s kidnapping—”

She hissed, let her hand fall away from the door, and stepped back so he could enter. “You have a lot of nerve—”

“No, you do.” Jason stalked into the apartment, then turned to face her. “You knew where my son was and said nothing—”

“I told you—”

“Yeah, and I swallowed that bullshit  about you being paralyzed and scared. I let myself believe you. But you didn’t stay scared, did you?” Jason asked, stepping close to her — Sam was forced to tilt her head up to maintain eye contact. “You went to Elizabeth to make her think Jake was dead.”

“That’s—” Sam swallowed hard. “You’re making it sound deliberate—”

“Because it was. You wanted Jake gone. You wanted me to lose my son when I was already facing a lifetime in prison—and you did it, you said, because you were scared. You weren’t scared. Or paralyzed. You were happy for Jake to disappear, weren’t you?’

“Why are you here?”

“There was a time I loved you,” he said, and she frowned, likely confused at the change in topic. “A time when I wanted my future to be with you.”

“You—”

“I felt guilty because I stopped wanting that at some point and I didn’t know how to tell you. I didn’t know how to end things without hurting you. And I’ve continued to feel that guilt. Do you think you’d be protected from prosecution if Elizabeth knew what you did?”

Sam licked her lips. “You never—”

“I never told anyone. Because I felt responsible. But today? I see who you really are. Spiteful. Vindictive.”

“How dare you—”

“You have nothing to do with my life anymore. Nothing to do with Elizabeth or her boys. You’re going to stop filling Lucky Spencer’s ears with your bullshit. If I find out you’re still trying to hurt Elizabeth or the kids—”

“What? You’ll have me arrested?” Sam sneered.

“You decided to make yourself a threat to my son the minute you kept your mouth shut about his kidnapping. Maureen would have given him back within hours, but you enjoyed hurting me, hurting Elizabeth—”

“No!”

“Stay away from me. From my life. From my son. Or you’ll see exactly who I am.”

Sam’s cheeks paled and she stepped back. “Are you threatening to kill me?” she asked, her voice trembling. “How could you—”

“Do you want to find out?” He took a step towards her, and she backed up hastily, against the door. She reached for the knob, twisted it. “I didn’t think so.”

“Get out.” But the sneer, the arrogance was gone, and there was fear in her eyes. Good.

He left, hearing the door slam behind him. He didn’t know if she truly believed him, and Jason didn’t even know if he believed himself —  but if Sam caused Elizabeth one more moment of pain —

They’d both find out what he was capable of.

This entry is part 37 of 41 in the Mad World: Liberty

Everyone’s got to face down the demons
Maybe today
We can put the past away

I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies
That you’ve been living in
And if you do not want to see me again
I would understand

Jumper, Third Eye Blind


Monday, May 5, 2004

Morgan Penthouse: Master Bedroom

Elizabeth wrinkled her nose, sifting through the basket of shirts to use for Cameron’s top layer of clothing. “How many world’s greatest grandmother shirts did Monica buy?” she asked, looking at Jason as he emerged from the bathroom, his hair damp from his shower.

“Knowing her, one for every day of the week,” Jason replied. “Are you taking him out today?”

“I thought about it,” Elizabeth told him. She took out a long-sleeved green shirt. “I know Laura wants to see him, but he’s still sleeping and eating so often, it’s hard to take him out for long.”

He looked at the clock on the nightstand. “Speaking of feeding, I’ll go get the next bottle ready.”

“Thanks,” Elizabeth called over her shoulder as she lifted Cameron into her arms and sat in the rocking chair. He waved his tiny fist, opened his eyes, then pressed his fist against his mouth. “Hey, baby. Does that taste good?” She danced her fingertips over his stomach. “Daddy’s bringing breakfast now.”

Jason returned with the bottle about ten minutes later. As he walked past her bureau, her cell phone rang. “Trade,” he told her. “I’ll feed him while you talk to Bobbie.” He settled himself in the chair with Cameron while Elizabeth answered.

“Hey, what’s up?”

“Hey! I hope it’s not too early.”

“No, we were just getting Cam ready for breakfast.” Elizabeth smiled as she watched Jason fit the bottle to Cameron’s mouth. His tiny hand tried to reach for it, but fell back to his side. “What’s up?”

“Oh, well, Carly and I were talking about doing something for us—I’m off from the hospital, and Lulu offered to watch Morgan. We were going to go shopping and have lunch at the Grille. I thought you might want to join us.”

Elizabeth bit her lip, looked over at Jason. “Well, I can’t really go for long—Cameron needs me—”

“I’ve got him,” Jason told her, glancing up at her. “I’ll be gone a while tomorrow, so you should get today.”

“You’re sure?” Elizabeth asked. “I don’t know—”

“Meet us for lunch at least,” Bobbie offered. “We can shop on our own. I mean, I was going to stop at Wyndham’s. You know their baby section is to die for—”

“Oh, that’s not fair—” She sighed. “All right. What time?”  She finished making plans with Bobbie, then closed her phone and tossed it aside. “Are you sure?” she asked Jason. “I haven’t been away from him for more than a few hours since I got home. I feel terrible—”

“Elizabeth, I have to go to Crimson Pointe tomorrow,” he reminded her. “I’ll be gone most of the day. You didn’t even blink at that.”

“Yeah, but that’s important—this is just shopping and lunch—”

“Do you want to go?”

She wrinkled her nose. “Yes.”

“Then go. You deserve it.”

“Well, if you twist my arm. I’ll let Cody know.” She paused. “You’re sure?”

“I am,” Jason replied. “I have to leave him for so long tomorrow, so I’m glad I don’t have to share him with you for a few hours today.”

“Well, when you put it that way.” She leaned over, kissed Cameron’s forehead, before brushing her lips against Jason’s. “Love you.”

“Love you, too.”

Dante & Cruz’s Apartment: Kitchen

Dante emerged from his room that morning and went straight for the coffee. “Hey,” he said to Cruz.

“Hey,” his roommate said. “Lu still asleep?”

“Yeah, she’s going to baby sit her cousin today, so she wanted to sleep in.” Dante sat down at the table.

“Yeah.” Cruz shifted. “Uh, listen, we didn’t really talk about it last night. With everyone around. No one really asked why I was there by myself.” He looked away.

“I didn’t want to assume,” Dante said carefully.  “You’ve always been private about that kind of thing. I kind of wondered, but it’s not my business to pry.”

“Oh.” Cruz hesitated. “Well…I’m gay,” he said, almost off-handedly. “I just—being a cop and all—”

“It’s not a friendly atmosphere for that kind of thing,” Dante finished. “Yeah, I’ve heard the idiots in the locker room, too, Cruz. You know I don’t care about any of that. I mean—” He winced. “I mean, it’s good. No, it’s fine—” He hissed. “I’m messing this up.”

“No.” Cruz shook his head. “No, you’re not. I know what you’re trying to say, and I appreciate it. And…the others?”

“They figure the same, but they’re not going to ask. If you want people to be out around—you know, they’re good. Lucky would be, too,” he added. “But that’s up to you. You just—you don’t have to hide it.” Dante sipped his coffee. “I’m going to the PCPD today to talk to Anna.”

Cruz raised his brows. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. I’m—” Dante hesitated. “I think I’m ready. I know the rumors will never stop and that people are always going to wonder, but I can’t—I miss it. I miss working with you guys. I miss the squad room. I miss feeling like I can make a difference. All I ever wanted was to be a cop.” He stared down into coffee. “You and Lucky haven’t really pushed me on this.”

“We both saw what you went through, and Lucky knows what happened in February was also about his dad. We all got scars to carry from our families, Dante,” Cruz said. “I came out to my parents when I was eighteen and they told me I was going to hell. I could either give it up or I could stop being their son. And my grandparents were on board. And up until then, my abuela—she was my rock. My champion.”

“Shit, man—” Dante cleared his throat. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, well,” Cruz jerked a shoulder and looked away. “I tried it for a year. Dated a girl in the neighborhood, but I couldn’t do it. I was starting to hate myself. So I told them I was sorry, but I couldn’t live like that. If I was going to burn in hell, then at least I’d live my truth. That was four years ago.”

“They haven’t changed their mind?”

“No. You’re always going to be Sonny Corinthos’s son. But that’s biology. Family isn’t supposed to reject their kids like mine did, and they’re not supposed to hold you back. You still got your Ma.” He grinned. “You know, she still dropped lasagnas off every week while you were at the diner.”

“Well, Ma can’t stand to see anyone starving.”

Brownstone: Taggert’s Apartment

Portia made a face as he pulled bacon out of his fridge. “Oh, no. Can you skip that today—” She touched her stomach. “It’s making me want to vomit.”

Taggert closed the fridge. “Why don’t I stop at Kelly’s and grab something to go?” he suggested, sitting down to finish his coffee. “I don’t wanna make you sick.”

“Well, since your kid makes me hate all food—”

“I’m guessing it’s always going to be my kid when you’re feeling miserable?” Taggert grinned at her when she just scowled. “Fair enough. You gonna be at the store all day?”

“That’s the plan. I want to finish some designs, so we can get them into production, and I have a client coming who wants a custom gown for something.” Portia sipped her tea. “What about you?”

He hesitated. “I’m contacting Sonny Corinthos to have him come in for questioning. I have enough probable cause to get him into the box,” he told her. When Portia blinked at him, he added, “I didn’t mention it because I knew it wouldn’t be a big deal. He’ll bring his lawyer, he won’t answer anything, and that’ll be that.”

“You don’t think you’ll be able to get anything?” Portia asked. “Then why do it?”

“Because it’s the only thing I haven’t done,” he replied. “I’ve interviewed anyone who might answer questions—not a long list. I’ve read all the paperwork—there’s nothing else except to interview my primary suspect.”

She sighed. “I’m sorry, baby, I know how much you struggled with this one. It’s hard knowing you might not close it.”

“Yeah, but I guess…” He sighed. “I guess it’s not the end of the world. The thing that bothered Anna in the first place was the lack of an investigation. We might not have had an arrest ten years ago, either. At least—at least we did what was right. We investigated, we followed the leads, and sometimes…”

He kissed her forehead as he got to his feet. “Sometimes you just can’t win.”

“Come by the store when you’re done today,” she suggested. She caught his arm. “We’ll get some dinner and I’ll make sure you get your mind off it.”

“If anyone can, it’s you.”

Corinthos Penthouse: Living Room

It had been two days and Jason had steadfastly refused to even let Sonny in to discuss the attempted kidnapping. Carly didn’t want him involved, and Jason wasn’t giving Sonny a chance to show his worth.

It was exhausting not to have control over a single damn thing. To see Lily out of the corner of his eye even though he dutifully took the damn medication every day and went to see Lainey Winters every week. He could feel the difference — his brain wasn’t so fogged up and his impulses were easier to control.

He felt more in control, so why the hell wasn’t anyone giving him the chance to show it?

Max knocked lightly on the door, then pushed it open. “Hey, Mr. C. Ms. Baines is here to see you.”

Ms. Baines? Sonny frowned, it clicked. Jordan. His lawyer. Maybe it was an update about the divorce. He was eager to get into court, to show everyone that he wasn’t going to let Carly push him around and pretend to be better than him.

“Sure, sure. Jordan.” Sonny smiled at her. “You want some coffee or something?”

“No thanks, Mr. Corinthos.” Jordan returned the smile, but it was thin and a bit impatient. “I have a few updates for you. We finally have a date for the first divorce hearing,” she reported. “We see the judge on June 7. Then we’re due on the adoption question on June 10.”

A month away, but Sonny couldn’t do anything about that and it certainly wasn’t Jordan’s fault. “Fine.”

“There was also a request from the PCPD to come in for questioning,” Jordan said. “Lieutenant Taggert didn’t say what the case was, so I told him I’d ask and get back to him. I’ll call him and tell him we’re not interested—”

“What’s this we bullshit?” Sonny demanded. “You don’t speak for me—”

“With the police I do—”

“You think I can’t control myself in an interrogation room?” Who the hell was this bitch to treat him this way?

“No, Mr. Corinthos—”

“Because I’ve been dealing with the cops since I was twelve.” Sonny reached for his coffee. “Tell him I’ll be there.”

“All right.” Unhappy, Jordan shifted her briefcase from one hand to the other. “I don’t see the point. We’ll simply refuse to answer questions—”

“And you can stay at home,” Sonny retorted, stopping her in mid sentence. “I can handle this.”

“Mr. Corinthos, while I’m unaware of any active investigations involving you,” Jordan began, “I think it is a bad decision to go without representation—”

“But it’s my decision, isn’t it? I still get to make those, don’t I?” Sonny demanded. “I’m still in charge here, aren’t I?”

“Of course.” Jordan drew back her shoulders. “I’ll tell them—”

“Don’t tell them I’m waiving my right to counsel,” Sonny ordered. “It’ll catch them off guard.” And then he’d control the room.

He’d remind everyone that he was Sonny fucking Corinthos, and he still had power. He was still someone to reckon with.

Someone to fear.

Port Charles Grille: Restaurant

“It’s hard to see who he’s taking after,” Elizabeth admitted as she gave Bobbie the set of photos she’d picked up on her way to Wyndham’s.

Carly tilted her head as she looked at a picture of Jason and Cameron. “I think he might have Jason’s jaw.”

“You can’t tell that on a eight week old preemie.” Bobbie rolled her eyes, but smiled and held up a picture of Elizabeth, Jason, and Cameron in the nursery. “This is a good one—”

“She took it, didn’t she?” Carly asked dryly.

“Yeah, on Friday—these are Friday’s pictures. I dropped off Saturday and Sunday when I picked these up.” Elizabeth sighed. “I can’t stop. I’m with him all the time, but I just—I guess I just want to mark every single minute.”

“Jason took a lot of photos of Michael,” Carly said. She handed the stack back to Elizabeth and picked up her mimosa. “When I, uh, left. And then while I was—” She squinted. “Detained.”

Bobbie lifted her brows. “Detained?”

“It’s how I’m going to explain not being in any photos with Michael one day,” Carly told her mother. “Until he’s old enough to understand temporary insanity, terrible mistakes, and how not to ruin people’s lives.” She shook her head. “Not like I’m looking forward to that conversation, but there’s a whole lot of people who don’t like me in this town, so it’s probably better if I get ahead of the damage.”

The waiter brought their orders and the conversation shifted to Carly teasing her mother about her undeclared relationship with Scott Baldwin. “I mean, why aren’t you guys just admitting it? How many dinners can someone share?”

“Why aren’t you guys saying what it is?” Elizabeth asked. “I mean, I don’t even see you that much, and I know you guys are dating.”

“Because every time I get into a relationship,” Bobbie said dryly, “it ends in public humiliation, arrests, and tears—”

“Oh, so you come by this genetically,” Elizabeth said to Carly. “That’s a relief.” Carly snickered, and Bobbie glared at them both.

“I liked you both better when you hated each other,” she said in withering tone. “Now you’re bickering like sisters.”

“Oh, that was mean—” Carly tossed an olive at her mother. “Take that back!”

“I had it coming,” Elizabeth admitted. Her phone buzzed and she grinned when she flipped it open. “Jason sent me a picture message—”

“Right on the hour. You have him trained so much better than I ever could.” Carly leaned over. “Oh—he’s taking a nap?”

“Yeah, he’s sleeping a lot. Up for an hour or two—usually to eat, then sleeping for two to three hours. On repeats,” Elizabeth said. “Jason and I mostly take turns, but I’m worried about my surgery. I won’t be able to do anything for almost a month—”

“Well, you know you just say the word and Monica will move into the guest room.” Bobbie wrinkled her nose. “Don’t let her hog my baby—I’m gonna want to help.”

“Oh, this is not going to be like the hospital,” Carly complained. “Emily better let me take a turn—”

Elizabeth pressed two fingers to her lips as tears suddenly burned in her eyes. “I’m okay—” she said when Bobbie frowned. “I just—it’s um—” She took a sip of water. “Last year, when I was pregnant the first time—” she looked at Carly. “I was so scared.”

“I remember,” Carly murmured. “I saw you at the hospital. I can’t decide if I gave you good advice or not—”

“I appreciated it,” Elizabeth told her. “But I was alone. Gram was gone, and Emily was out of town. I was barely friends with Nikolas. I just—I didn’t think there was anyone I could turn to, and now—God—less than a year later—I have people fighting over who gets to help—”

Bobbie covered her hand, laced their fingers together, then squeezed. “I should have been there for you after losing Audrey. I’m so sorry, baby.”

“It’s okay. Um, I’m not sorry about what happened last year. I mean, other than—” Elizabeth looked at Carly, “—obviously if I could have everything I have without either of one of us going through what we did—”

“But since we can’t take any of it back,” Carly said, “and we’re not going to get a real resolution, at least we can point to a silver lining. You and Jason have Cameron, and that wouldn’t have happened.”

“You don’t feel like it’s resolved?” Bobbie asked with a frown. “I mean—Ric is dead—”

“He is. But I didn’t—” Carly leaned back in her seat, hesitating. “I didn’t get to be part of it. He didn’t pay enough.” She squinted at Elizabeth. “Do you know what I mean?”

“Yeah. I remember arguing with Jason—” she paused. “At Thanksgiving, when we were still kind of dealing with the idea of him being out there—what would happen when he was found—I told him that the only way Ric being dead would feel fair was if I got to pull the trigger.”

“Exactly. Otherwise—” Carly stabbed her fork into her salad. “It will never feel over.”

Elm Street Pier

Claudia was right. Nadine did like to sip a hot chocolate while walking on the pier.

Johnny swallowed hard and started down the steps towards the pretty blonde nurse sitting on the bench looking over the water. She turned her head at his entrance and smiled. “Hey! I don’t usually get to see you in the daylight.”

“Yeah, I keep crazy hours at the club.” He sat next to her, then stared at his hands. He should break things off. It hadn’t really even started. A few dates didn’t mean anything, and maybe it wouldn’t go anywhere.

But Claudia already knew about her.

“Johnny?” Nadine frowned at him. “Are you okay? You have the strangest look on your face.”

“That guy who came to the club the other night—he’s one of your patient’s fathers,” Johnny said.

“Yeah. His son was in the NICU for a while.” Nadine’s smile faded. “You work for him. I know that. I read the papers, Johnny. He’s Jason Morgan and you’re Anthony Zacchara’s son. I’m not stupid. What’s going on?”

“I—You never said anything.” Christ. He hated this. He didn’t want any of this. He stared back at his hands. “I never should have walked up to you at the club,” he muttered.

“Is it because I took care of his son? Does he think something’s going on? I don’t know anything—”

“No. That’s just a coincidence.” Johnny sat up. “I know something bad is going to happen,” he told her bluntly. “But if I say anything to stop it, something might happen to you.”

Nadine stared at him for a long moment, then turned to look out over the lake. She sipped her hot chocolate. “How bad?” she asked.

“I don’t know. But it probably involves that kid you took care of.” His sister was crazy that way, and if she needed to get to Jason Morgan, the quickest way was through his wife and son.

“He was so small when they brought him in,” Nadine said softly. “Preemies don’t always make it, you know, and it’s hard. You tell yourself don’t get attached. Don’t get involved. But you can’t help yourself. Sometimes the parents don’t visit because they know and it hurts too much, but someone has to love them.”

“Nadine—”

“He’s a baby, Johnny. If he’s in danger, if someone is going to hurt his family, I want to help them. I’m a nurse, and I’m an adult. I can take care of myself, okay? You can tell me where to go and what to do.” She lifted her chin. “But you know what you have to do.”

“Yeah.” Johnny nodded. “Yeah. I do. But first, I’m going to make sure you’re safe. Come on.”

PCPD: Commissioner’s Office

“I know that it’s unlikely that Jordan Baines will allow Sonny to answer any questions,” Anna said to Taggert, “but there’s a chance that simply bringing up Oliver Joyce will disarm him.”

“Yeah, that’s my best shot at this. He’s not going to be looking for that case to come back. As far as I can tell, I don’t think he’s even connected Kelsey to her father. All I need is him to say one thing,” he muttered. “One thing I can use to investigate.”

“It’s more likely that this will be the last step,” Anna said gently. She looked up at the knock on her door. “Yes?”

“Sorry, Commissioner,” her secretary said. “I know you’re in a meeting, but you told me if Dante Falconieri ever showed up—”

“Yes, yes—” Anna went to the doorway to usher the young man in from the waiting area. “Dante.”

“Hey.” Dante winced when he saw Taggert in the office. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt anything—”

“It’s fine. We were finishing up. What can I do for you?” she asked, almost eagerly. “How are you?”

“I’m good. Um, I was—I’ve been working through a lot the last few months,” he told her, then looked at Taggert. “I was hoping the offer to get my badge back would still be open.”

Taggert’s shoulders slumped in relief. “Hell, yes.”

Anna arched a brow, amused at Taggert’s impatience. “The lieutenant is correct. We desperately need good officers, and you were one of our best.” She went over to her drawer and drew out the badge. “There will be some paperwork, so you won’t be back on the job for a few days, but this is yours.”

Dante took it from her, then looked down with slow exhale. “Yeah. Yeah, that’s mine.”

“It’s good, actually, that you can’t start for a few days,” Taggert told him. “We’re pulling Sonny in for questioning on a case. It won’t go anywhere,” he added when Dante just sighed. “But the dust will probably settle on it before you start.” He extended a hand. “Welcome back.”

Dante shook the lieutenant’s hand. “Thank you, sir.”

Port Charles Hotel: Parking Garage

“I’m still surprised Jason didn’t send you with a guard,” Bobbie said to Carly as they left the elevator and started for the section where their cars were parked. “After Friday—” she looked at Carly with narrowed eyes. “Shouldn’t someone be following you around?”

“Things have been quiet for months,” Carly pointed out. “Literally since everything happened with Ric in the first place. And—” She handed her shopping bags to Cody who already had Elizabeth’s. He started for the car.

“Other than Vinnie Esposito,” Elizabeth said. She gestured at the end of the row where her car was parked next to Carly’s. Cody had gone ahead with their bags and was maybe fifteen feet away. He met Carly’s driver, Chris, at the car and opened the trunk.

“I suppose,” Bobbie murmured. “But you know me, I’d wrap my girls in plastic wrap if you’d let me—”

“See, when she calls us that,” Carly said to Elizabeth, “I think she’s just trying to mess with us.”

“Don’t take the bait,” Elizabeth replied. Bobbie rolled her eyes.

“I’m just saying—”

They stopped as a blue sedan slowly rolled past them, down towards the next level—but then it stopped in front of them.

Carly blinked, took a step back. Elizabeth locked eyes with Cody—grabbed Carly’s arm—reached out for Bobbie—But a woman with long black hair swinging over her shoulder was out of the car before Elizabeth could reach her—and had a gun to Bobbie’s temple.

“Get in the car—”

The guards were already running towards them—but—

“Get in the car or I’ll blow her brains out right here,” the woman snarled. Carly rushed forward, fumbled with door latch.

“Don’t hurt my mother—” she said, turning to Elizabeth who was already behind her. “Don’t hurt her—just leave her—”

“No chance—” When Carly and Elizabeth were inside, the woman hurled Bobbie in after her—then got into the car, stopping to wave at the guards—it squealed away just as Cody and Chris reached them.

“Damn it—” Cody panted. “Get back to the car—call Jason—”

He winced as he heard the car squealing on the lower levels—they’d never get back to the car in time and catch up. “Fuck!”

“That was Claudia Zacchara,” Chris said. “She waved at us—”

“She fucking smiled—” Cody hissed. “She wanted us to know—” He yanked his phone out of his pocket. He’d walked away from Elizabeth for less than a minute, and she was gone.

August 17, 2022

Update Link: The Last Time – Scenes 15-18

Yesterday: Mad World, Book 4 – Chapter 111

Hope everyone is having a good week. I know I warned you guys Flash Fic would be a bit wonky this week, but I really didn’t plan on skipping two days. Monday morning, I woke up early to get it done before lunch with my mother, but I ended up writing the eulogy for Lauren’s services on Thursday. I thought it would be more difficult, but the beginning was just in my head when I woke up, so I sat down to write it. But then it kind of messed me up a bit all day, and it was hard to clear my head again.

Yesterday, I had a work event. My VP asked for some of our NJHS kiddos to volunteer at sixth-grade orientation, so I decided it was a good idea to go supervise them, even though it was unpaid and voluntary. It was actually a lot of fun and helped get my mind off things. I really love all my kids, but I won’t lie and say that there’s a few of the incoming eighth graders that are my favorites, and they showed up yesterday.  Teaching is such a demanding job with so little monetary worth, but you can ignore that a lot if you genuinely love the kids. When this group graduates this year, I’m going to be weeping like a crazy person.

Then I had an MRI, which I didn’t think would be so bad  because I’d already had two MRAs which is similar, but the MRI was on my spine, and it was more restraining. It just put me in a weird headspace, so I just figured, better to skip and relax and come back today.

Anyway, we should be good to stay on schedule the rest of the week.

This entry is part 4 of 10 in the The Last Time

Written in 62 minutes.


15
This is the last time I’m asking you why

Elizabeth’s eyes fluttered and her head moved slightly, the first signs that she was finally waking just as streaks of sunlight dawned over the city outside the hospital room. Jason straightened, wiping the grit from lack of sleep from his eyes with the heel of the hand not holding hers.

Her head turned, one cheek pressing into the soft white pillow beneath her head, her tangled curls sliding across her face. Her lashes fluttered again and then her eyes were open, the deep blue glassy at first, then gradually focusing. “Jason?” The tip of her tongue swept across her dry, cracked lips and she said his name again. “Is that you…are you—”

“I’m here.” Jason squeezed her hand, bent closer so he could hear better, her voice hoarse. “Right here.”

“I’m—” She closed her eyes and her free hand slid down, covering her belly. Jason rested the other hand, still clasped within his, over the curve of their baby. He’d felt the baby kick off and on in the last few hours, and now she could feel it, too. A tear slid beneath her lashes. “He’s okay.”

“Kelly came to check again an hour ago. He’s perfect,” Jason told her. He released her hand, then swept her hair off her face, their eyes meeting. “You both are.”

“You came back,” she said softly. “I made you leave.”

“Kelly did, and she was right,” Jason added. “I’m not sorry everyone knows,” he continued, “but you didn’t need that last night. I’m sorry for that.”

“You…” She swallowed again. “I lied. You don’t…you’re not mad anymore.”

“I never really was,” he confessed. Whatever flush of anger and disappointment in her had swept away as quickly as it had sprung up. She’d tried to tell him so many times, and he hadn’t made it easy. It didn’t matter. Not anymore. “I’m here. And I’m not going anywhere.”

16
You break my heart in the blink of an eye

He said he wasn’t leaving, but Elizabeth kept expecting him to. Jason still wore the dark sweater and pants that had allowed him to blend in as one of the hostage-takers, his hair disheveled, his eyes red and tired from the lack of sleep. She wouldn’t have blamed him if ‘d made excuses to go home. To shower and change.

But he didn’t. He stayed, leaving only to let the nurse’s station know Elizabeth was awake and to get some water.

In the elevator, when she’d been so tired and worn out from the long night, from the interminable months of lying and holding in everything so tightly — when he’d asked her to marry him, she might have said yes.

But in the cold light of day, as the fluids helped her regain her energy, they also returned her perspective. Nothing had changed since she’d told him of the baby all those months ago, when he’d offered to marry her, only that he knew for sure now that it was his child.

And now her answer would have to be the same, no matter how much it hurt to turn away the dream.

Kelly was smiling as she came into the room an hour or so after Elizabeth had woken. “I hope you finally got some rest,” she said, checking the vitals one of the other nurses had written down. “Everything looks good—fetal heartbeat back in the right change—the only vital sign I’m nervous about is the blood pressure.”

Jason folded his arms. “I thought you said last night—”

“It was high last night,” Kelly said, unwinding her stethoscope and pressing one end against Elizabeth’s belly. “But I wanted to see what would happen with fluids and rest. It’s still high, but it’s back in the normal range.”

“But?” Elizabeth prompted, looking at the monitor that she knew measured her child’s heartbeat, reassured by the spikes.

“You nearly went into premature labor,” Kelly said. “I’ve been reading reports from the scene — Emily said you couldn’t any movement for a while?”

Oh, she’d been so scared when her precious baby stopped kicking, and she couldn’t feel those flutters — no sharp kicks against her ribs. “Yes, but I—I felt him again after the explosion.” Her eyes found Jason’s. “Remember?”

“Yeah.” Jason nodded, smiling at the memory. “Awake and definitely moving. You said his heartbeat was good—”

“And it is. By all accounts, he’s in good shape,” Kelly continued. “I want to keep him that way. I’ll release you, Liz, but you have to promise me you’ll take it easy. Not strict bed rest, but I’m going to talk—” She stopped swallowed. “I’ll get you taken off the schedule,” she said finally. Elizabeth frowned at her, confused by the way she’d phrased it.

“Kelly, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Kelly said, darting her eyes at Jason, then back at Elizabeth. “I’ll get your discharge papers ready.” Then she left.

Jason exhaled slowly, sat back down at her bed side. “I want to help,” he told her. “Whatever I can do to make things easier. I mean, I know you’re already worried about not being at work—” He paused. “Before we were rescued, we were talking about how to do this, and I’m still—I want to—”

“Before you ask that question again,” Elizabeth said, and he closed his mouth, “I want to remind you that it’s not the first time we’ve talked about this. And I haven’t—” She forced the words out. “Jason, you’re engaged to another woman,” she said gently. “And my divorce isn’t final from another man. What you’re suggesting, what you’re asking, it’s not reality. It can’t be.”

He shook his head. “It can be,” Jason insisted. “If you—we could make it work—”

“You and I have done this before. Marriage. To other people,” she clarified. “How many times did I tell myself I could make this work. If I just ignored this, or didn’t ask that. You know what I’m talking about, Jason. You’ve been through it with Courtney. You didn’t say that then?”

“I—” He pressed his lips together. “It’s different. We’re not—that’s not what—”

“My answer is no,” she said gently, even as it ripped her in two because it was all she wanted. All she dreamed of.

But he didn’t love her, and eventually, it would destroy them both.

“I want you to be in this baby’s life, and I know there are things we need to talk about. We will. But that needs to be off the table, Jason.” Her voice faltered. “You’re asking the same question but nothing else has changed. I can’t keep saying no. Please don’t do ask again.”

17
You find yourself at my door

Lucky knocked gently on the door frame of Emily’s bedroom, drawing her attention from the window seat where she sat, curled up in a ball hugging a pillow against her. “I thought about climbing the trellis,” he told her.

She smiled sadly. “The way you did when we were kids.”

He sat down next to her on the window seat. “I’m sorry about your dad.”

“Yeah.” Emily closed her eyes. “I’m glad I was able to say goodbye. That Mom and I—that Jason—at least we had that. Grandfather didn’t make it in time.” She looked back out over the gardens. “I knew he was getting older. He was already older when they adopted me. And parents should go first. Right? It’s just…it’s how the world works when it’s fair. And yet—”

“And yet.”

She dragged in a deep, shuddering breath. “I didn’t get—I meant to go see Liz last night, but I never made it, and then Dad—I just—”

“It’s okay. Um, she’s okay as far as I know.” Lucky paused. “But I’m not the person to ask. Not anymore.”

“Lucky—”

“You’re going to be an aunt,” he said, then paused because the bitterness, the grief threatened to swallow him whole. “And I’m not going to be a father.”

She stared at him, her brown eyes wide. “But—”

“And I’m only telling you that because you need something to cheer you up.” He forced a smile. “And-and I’m sure it’s helping Jason—” Lucky squeezed his eyes shut. God, he just wanted to this go away. He wanted to disappear into nothing. Into the sweet oblivion. He wanted the world to simply stop.

“Lucky,” Emily sat up, her eyes kind, but unsurprised. “I didn’t know—I thought the test ruled him out.”

“Apparently not,” Lucky said, absorbing the fact that Emily had known the possibility had existed. And had said nothing. Everyone had lied to protect him, holding his hand like he was a child who couldn’t be trust.

And it shamed him to know it was the truth.

“Anyway, that’ll be good for you guys,” Lucky said again, looking for the good. Looking for the words to make things okay for his oldest and dearest friend. Elizabeth might have had a thousand reasons not to tell him, but if Emily of all people had kept the secret — well that was just proof that it had been done because no one thought Lucky could cope with reality. “You’ll have something to look forward to. Right?”

“Right.” Emily smiled at him, but it was sad. “I’m so sorry, Lucky. I know you wanted this to be different.”

“I made my choices,” he told her. “And Elizabeth made hers. I’m going to find a way to be okay with that. Right now, I want you to know I’m here. And that I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

18
Just like all those times before

Please don’t ask again.

It shouldn’t have hurt like this. Nothing Elizabeth had said was a lie. He was engaged to another woman. Someone he genuinely loved and cared about, someone who had been struck a blow before all of this had started when Sam had learned she couldn’t have children of her own, and then she’d learned in the worst way possible that he was going to be a father.

He left the hospital because Elizabeth had asked him to, and because he needed to. He needed a shower. Rest. Because then he would be able to figure out how to explain to Elizabeth what he meant when he said they could make it work. He would find the words to make her understand why he wanted this.  He wanted to be a father. He wanted to take care of her. Why wasn’t it allowed to be that simple?

He remembered, of course, the biggest reason why it wouldn’t be that way when he pushed open the door to the penthouse, and Sam was there, sitting on the sofa, a mug of coffee in her hands.

They eyed each other warily as she set the coffee on the table, then rose to her feet. Twenty-four hours earlier, Jason had seen a future with her that was mostly what he wanted, and now, the days, weeks, and months stretched in front of him and he didn’t see her any more. How could one day change so much?

“I’m sorry,” Sam said. “About Alan. I waited in the ICU for you to come back. I thought you’d spend the night with your family.”

He had, but if he said that now, would that hurt her? Would it make her leave? And if she went, could he ask Elizabeth again because now something had changed? What kind of man did that make him? He wanted the woman he’d asked to marry him to leave so he could start a life with someone else.

Jason swallowed hard, because nothing kind was coming to mind and he really didn’t know how to deal with any of this. His father was dead, a father he’d never let into his life, and now Jason would live his life with those regrets in his heart. What ifs haunting him for the rest of his life, and he didn’t want that anymore—

“Did you know before last night?” Sam asked. “Did you know that the baby was yours?”

“No,” Jason said. “I didn’t.”

She folded her arms. “She lied to you. For months. To you, to Lucky, to the world.”

There was truth in those words, but not enough of it, and so Jason said nothing. How could he begin to articulate what was swirling in his head. Yes, Elizabeth had technically lied, but it hadn’t felt like dishonesty. And how did you explain the difference between the two? Could you? All he knew was that her lie hadn’t felt malicious, hadn’t been designed to hurt him, and so he didn’t care.

He was going to be a father. It was all that mattered at the end of the day.

“What are you going to do?” Sam broke in, her eyes burning, her cheeks flushed. “You’re just standing there, and you’re not saying anything.”

What did she want from him? He’d spent hours on the edge of disaster, carefully plotting to extricate the people he loved from a ruthless man who had nearly killed Robin and whose deeds had left to Alan’s death? Then he’d spent even longer, trapped in an elevator, unsure if he or Elizabeth — or their child — would be rescued. And then his father had died.

He had nothing left for anyone, much less Sam who seemed to be angry about something that had nothing to do with her.

“I’m not doing this,” Jason said finally. “I did nothing wrong—”

“Nothing—” Her nostrils flared. “How can you say that? Where were you? With her, weren’t you? Instead of grieving with your family, working this out with me, you went and held her hand, didn’t you?”

“My father died,” Jason said, testing out the words, and finding he didn’t like the way they tasted. The way it felt to say them, and have it be a truth wrapped inside a lie. “My child and his mother nearly died. My sister had to choose between them. If you want to have this argument, if you really want this right now—” His words were flat, unfeeling, empty as he spoke them. “If this is the conversation you want to have this morning, then there’s nothing to say.”

“Wait—”

“I did nothing wrong,” he repeated. “Nothing. You and I were not together the night this baby was conceived. And I never lied to you about it. I told you it was a possibility, and I told you what I knew when I knew it.”

“Jason, okay, maybe I was just—”

“I did do something wrong,” he corrected, and she stopped talking, her eyes wide. “But you didn’t know about it, so it can’t be the reason you’re doing this. But I’m not sorry.” And he’d do it again. “I asked her to marry me.”

Sam fisted her hands at her side. “Do I get an invitation?” she bit out.

“No,” he said shortly. “She said no.” He went to the stairs, climbed them. Sam followed as he went into their bedroom, went into the closet and pulled out a duffel bag.

“What are you doing? Jason, wait, I’m sorry. Let me—I can do this right. I was going to be okay, and then you didn’t come home—”

He yanked out the top drawer of the dresser harder than he meant, and the dresser shook. He shoved clothes into the bag, not caring really what he packed until it was stuffed. He looked at Sam again, at the woman he’d expected to share his life with. Her face was stained with tears, her dark eyes pained. “I’m sorry,” Jason said, and this he meant because he’d done nothing wrong, and maybe she really hadn’t either.

But that was the world sometimes. Two people could do no wrong, and still they could end up here. At the end of the road. He’d reached it abruptly, without warning. Without understanding. And he could only hope it would make sense to the both of them one day.

But if he spent one more minute in this room, struggling through a conversation he didn’t want to have, he’d go insane.

He picked up the bag and left.

August 16, 2022

This entry is part 36 of 41 in the Mad World: Liberty

I’ve got my memories
Always inside of me
But I can’t go back
Back to how it was

I believe in now
I’ve come too far
Now I can’t go back
Back to how it was

This is Home, Switchfoot


Friday, May 2, 2004

Corinthos & Morgan Warehouse: Office

“I agree,” Bernie declared. “This doesn’t make any sense unless if it’s someone trying to trash the truce.” He leaned back and looked at Justus. “What do you think? Another member of the Zaccharas?”

“Maybe someone in our organization dissatisfied with how Jason handled things,” Justus suggested. “That would explain Richie.”

Jason scowled. He didn’t like the thought of another guard who’d been near Elizabeth turning on him. Cody, he could understand, but Richie? “What do you mean?”

“Richie wanted you in on this as soon as possible,” Justus said. “But he also brought it directly to your home — which is across the hall from Sonny. Making sure that this happened there meant it was more likely Sonny would know about it.”

Jason sat down. He hadn’t considered that angle. “But who would Richie be working with? Tommy?”

“The Vinnie thing scared him straight,” Bernie said. “He was so worried you’d cut off his balls for even accidentally protecting Elizabeth’s, uh, attacker, that he’s been quiet. I also think Sonny being clearly out has helped. Not that I don’t think Tommy shouldn’t be watched, but I don’t see him going after Carly.”

“Tommy’s more direct than that.” Justus tapped his fingers against the arm of the chair. “What if Anthony is trying to trash the truce himself? He wants to test to see if you’re gonna go after the kid. Johnny doesn’t get any marks on him, that just gives Anthony reason to think you’re weak.”

“So I’m supposed to knock the kid around on the half-chance that Anthony’s behind this?” Jason shook his head. “I’m not going to do that—”

“Well, what if it is the daughter acting on her own? Trying to prove to Anthony that she can play with the big boys?” Bernie said. “You said she’s barely tolerated. Maybe she wants more.”

“Then why fake a kidnapping against Carly? It would make more sense to go after Elizabeth if she really wanted to get Jason riled up. Not that Carly isn’t important,” Justus added, “but—”

“But it’s what Zaccharas do. Anthony’s known for targeting families. She went after Carly because of Richie.” More and more, Jason was convinced that Richie had acted deliberately. Francis trained the guards better than that, and Richie had been with them too long not to know how to play the game. “If Richie had still been guarding Elizabeth, it would have been her last night.” And that thought chilled him to the bone. If not for the blackout making Elizabeth uncomfortable, would it have been her?

He went over to the phone and pressed a speed dial. “Hey, Francis. Can you get Richie over here? Yeah, too. We need to debrief about last night.”

“What if it’s Sonny?” Justus asked quietly as Jason put the phone down. Jason frowned at him. “We know Sonny’s unhappy about being out of power. He still has connections, still has supporters. And he was quick last night. You said he was waiting.”

“No—” Jason paused. “No,” he repeated. “I’m not saying Sonny’s not capable of coming after me, but I don’t think—”

“You don’t think he’d go after Carly?” Justus asked flatly. “He’s done it before, hasn’t he? Maybe he just wanted her grabbed so he could force her into talking. I know he’s supposedly on medication, but doesn’t it sometimes take years to find the right treatment for bipolar disorders?”

Jason grimaced. There was nothing Justus was saying that wasn’t true, but it didn’t—it didn’t click. It didn’t work for him. “You’re not wrong, but what woman would Sonny have asked to carry this out? Sonny barely let Carly in the same room when talking about business. He’s…” He paused. “He’s sexist,” he admitted. “He likes keeping women out of it. Completely. I can’t see him having a woman grab Carly.”

“Okay, that I can understand. I still think it’s worth looking into, even if we end up ruling it out. Outside of this kidnapping attempt, Jason, things have actually been quiet,” Justus reminded his cousin. “And they’ve been quiet for months. Ric Lansing has been the only thorn in our side since last summer. Ric and the Zaccharas. Even through all of it, we kept things together.”

“The warehouse operated, and we still did the job. I’m with Justus. I don’t think we need to look too far for who’s behind this. It might be temping to think it’s a new enemy, but I think we’re looking at an inside job. At least partially,” Bernie offered.

“Yeah, I agree—” Jason paused as the phone lit up. He answered. “Francis?” He grimaced. “How long? Okay. Okay. Yeah, come over. We need to talk about this.” He set the receiver in the hook. “Francis sent Richie home last night with a guard watching. They’re both gone.”

Justus got to his feet. “The other guard?”

“Chuck Ohlendorf. Pull his file. I want to know what the hell he’s worked on for the last few weeks. Either Richie killed him and escaped or they were in on it together. Francis said Chuck volunteered.” Jason clenched his jaw. He was done with people inside the organization coming after him.

He’d get to the bottom of it, once and for all.

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

“Hey.” Elizabeth stepped back to let Carly and Michael in. “Jason had to go into work, so he’s not going to be here.”

“Oh.” Carly chewed on her bottom lip, clutching Michael’s hand in hers. “That makes sense, I guess. After last night.”

“Mommy?” Michael tipped up his head. “Can I still meet my cousin?”

“Yeah, sure, Mr. Man.” She ruffled his blond hair and smiled weakly at Elizabeth. “I think Aunt Elizabeth said some more of Cam’s family was going to come by. You know Jason’s mom?”

“Yeah.” Michael nodded. He bounced over to the sofa. “Where’s Cam? Can I hold him?”

“Monica is on her way up,” Elizabeth told Carly. “The front desk called while you were in the elevator. Does he remember—”

“I don’t know. He might.” Carly folded her arms. “But that’s my problem. Why don’t you go get Cameron? He might distract Michael.”

“Okay. I’ll be right back. Michael, I’m going to get Cam now.”

Elizabeth had just disappeared around the landing when the knock came. Carly braced herself, then opened the door to find Monica and AJ waiting. “Hey. Elizabeth just went to get the baby, and, um, Jason had to go into work.”

Michael slid off the sofa, his eyes furrowing as AJ came in after Monica, his steps hesitant. “Mom.”

“Michael, this is Uncle Jason’s brother. You, um, remember him, I guess.” Carly’s palms felt sweaty. “He came over to meet his nephew.”

Michael cleared his throat. “I thought you and Daddy didn’t like him.”

To AJ’s credit, his face didn’t change at the mention of Sonny, though Carly’s stomach lurched. “People can be wrong, baby. And I was. AJ’s a nice guy. He’s—I mean, we’ve talked about him.” She went over to the sofa and tugged Michael towards her so that he focused on her. “We talked about families are all different, and that some families are made because of blood, and others because we pick each other. Right?”

“Right. You said he—” Michael slid a suspicious glance at AJ who put his hands in his pockets. “You said he was my family by blood.”

“He is.” She pointed at Monica. “And that’s your  grandmother.” Was she doing this wrong? How did you undo six years of damage, she wondered. Six years of lies and betrayal. “Jason and AJ are brothers. It’s why Cameron is your cousin. You’ve got a lot of family you haven’t spent a lot of time with.”

“How come? Didn’t they want me?”

Monica sucked in a breath, and Carly flinched. “They wanted you. They always wanted you. I was just so scared—” She squeezed her eyes shut. “I was scared they’d take you from me. But I was wrong.”

“Oh.” Michael didn’t really know what to do with that, but he’d learned to roll with the punches these days. He looked back at AJ and Monica, some of the suspicious gone. “You didn’t meet Cam yet either?”

“I have,” Monica volunteered, her eyes lighting up as she took a few steps forward. “I’m a doctor and I got to see him at the hospital. But—” She touched AJ’s shoulder. “He hasn’t. You’ll get to meet him together.”

“He’s very little,” Michael told AJ seriously. “He was born before he was done cooking. That’s what Uncle Lucas says.”

“I know, we have to be careful with him.” AJ crouched down in front of his son. “You have a new little brother, don’t you? So you know all about being a big brother and being careful.”

Michael beamed. “Mommy says I’m the best big brother. Right?”

“The best of the best.”

“Can you help me?” AJ wanted to know. “You’ll hold him first? And show me how?”

“You got it.”

“Sorry,” Elizabeth apologized as she turned the corner, carefully coming down the second set of stairs. “We had a diaper situation.”

Monica hurried over to the foot of the stairs, her hands outstretched in case Elizabeth needed her. “How is he this morning?”

“Perfect.” Elizabeth was smiling as she stepped off the bottom step. “Hey, Michael.” She flicked her eyes to AJ. “AJ.”

“Elizabeth.” AJ rose to his feet. “Michael’s going to show me how to hold a baby. I haven’t done it in a while.”

Michael clambered onto the sofa, tucked himself in the corner so that he could hold up his arm and then waited. Elizabeth carefully set Cameron into his arms, then stepped back. “He’s so little,” the boy said in awed voice. “Is it because he didn’t cook all the way?”

“Yeah, but he’ll catch up and one day, you won’t even be able to tell.” Elizabeth stepped back.   “And he’s gonna need you and Morgan. He doesn’t have any older siblings of his own. You okay with that?”

“I’ll show Morgan how,” Michael said. He looked down at Cameron. “Hi, Cam. I’m Michael.”

Carly stepped back and watched as AJ gingerly stepped forward and sat next to Michael on the sofa. Her breath came a bit easier as Michael’s smiles seemed genuine.

“Thank you,” Monica murmured. Carly turned. “For this.”

“Don’t thank me for doing the right thing. I should have done this years ago.”

“As someone who made mistakes of her own as a new mother—” Monica took a deep breath. “Better late than never.”

Luke’s: Office

“This is becoming a regular occurrence,” Luke grumbled as he let Taggert in. “What do you want?” He went over to the mini bar and poured himself a water, though he was tempted to reach for the whiskey.

“Oliver Joyce knew that Karen Wexler was Scott Baldwin’s daughter,” Taggert said. He rested his hands on the top of a chair in front of Luke’s desk. “He found out sometime in the fall of 1993. Rhonda was worried about Karen, and wanted Oliver’s help.”

“Okay.” Luke paused. “So?”

“And according to the widow, Oliver was having issues with the new manager of the Paradise. The new manager installed by Frank Smith as a favor to Joe Scully.” Taggert paused. “Sonny was that manager. The problems began, as far as I can tell, around the time Oliver found out that Karen was Scott’s daughter.”

“Hell.” Luke sat down at the desk. “Damn it.” He reached for a cigar, placing the tip in his mouth.

“And Angela Joyce identified Sonny as the man who threatened her in the morgue the morning after he was murdered—”

Luke yanked the cigar out of his mouth as it dropped open. “The hell it was—”

“I wasn’t sure either, but then I started thinking about it. This was personal, Luke. Even you didn’t know anything for sure, and no one was closer to Sonny than you. Someone threatened her. I believe that much. Who would Sonny have trusted to do that? It had to be him.”

“Christ.” Luke put his head in his hands. “There’s enough truth in that—”

“Angela Joyce isn’t going to come forward at this point. Not to point the finger at Sonny,” Taggert continued. “I can’t do anything with what I have so far. All I have is rumors and speculation.” Taggert met Luke’s eyes. “I know you’re out of the game, Luke, but you know things. I need a reason to get him into interrogation. It’s the only chance I got.”

“Sonny’s never going to admit to anything, Taggert—”

“Maybe not. But it’s the only card I got left to play. Everything leads to him. Ollie worked for Frank Smith for years, and clashed with Sonny after learning Karen was the daughter of an old friend. Ollie was murdered by someone he’d get into a car with, and the case was covered up by a corrupt cop who was always Sonny’s guy and never Frank’s. I need you tell me what you know.”

Luke twirled the cigar in his hands and thought about his own family. His parents—the sweetness of his mother, the cruelty of his father—if there was a chance that young Luke could have brought Tim Spencer to justice for what he’d done, would have he have done it? Were old loyalties to a man who didn’t understand the meaning of the word enough to stay silent?

“I’ve told you everything I knew for sure,” Luke said after a minute. “Sonny was close to challenging Frank Smith, and he didn’t want anything getting in his way. I needed Sonny to win that war, Taggert, because getting rid of Smith would keep my family safe. He had to be gone, and I’m not sorry I was the one who did it.” He smiled thinly. “That’s off the record, by the way.”

“I’m not here on that case, Luke. I just want Kelsey to have some answers.”

“I know.” Luke sat up and reached for the lighter. “You have to trust people in that life, Taggert. Maybe that doesn’t make sense to you, but you gotta know someone’s got your back. Sonny—back then—he had my back. And I kept his secrets. He kept mine. He never screwed me over. It’s hard to let that go. It’s a code—”

“Luke—”

“But I can’t walk around pretending I’m a better man if I don’t do right by Ollie and his daughter now. By Scottie and his kid, either. Laura wants me to tell you everything. She wanted it from the start, and I keep trying to slip past it.”

Taggert studied Luke for a long moment. “What haven’t you told me yet? What secret are you keeping?”

“Ollie didn’t like me, going back to the breakup of Scottie and Laura’s marriage. He always gave me the stank eye when we came around, but he finally confronted me one day. Wanted to know how I could be around Sonny when he was hurting women.” Luke swallowed hard. “He knew about the girls. Karen wasn’t the only. Not the first. But maybe the last.”

“Did Ollie get in Sonny’s way?”

“Yeah. Yeah, he did.  He was planning to go state’s witness. I couldn’t tell you how Sonny found out—maybe Ollie trusted the wrong guy. But Sonny found out, and then the next thing I knew, Ollie was gone. The papers said it was a car accident.”

“Did you know it wasn’t?”

Luke exhaled a long waft of smoke and looked at the glow of the cigar tip. “Not for sure, mind you. But Sonny was worried, and then he wasn’t. I suspected it, but I couldn’t let myself think about it. I’m pretty good about locking up unwanted thoughts and bad memories.” He looked over at the lieutenant. “I considered Sonny a friend for a long time, Taggert, but I always knew he’d sell out his own mother for power. He’s been chasing it for too long, and I think he’s forgotten how to live without it. I didn’t know for sure that Sonny was the trigger man, but if Ollie was going after him because of Karen — I think maybe Ollie might have tried to be fair and give him a chance to come clean.”

“That would have been a mistake,” Taggert said. He straightened. “Would you go on record with a statement that Oliver and Sonny were fighting around the time of the murder? Because it’s thin, but it’s enough to request an interview.”

“On the record,” Luke repeated. He set down the cigar, and thought again of his family. Of Laura and the little she’d asked of him. “Yeah, okay. On the record.”

The Star Lounge: Upstairs Apartment

Johnny paced the small living room area, dragging his hands through his hair, waiting impatiently as the phone rang. If Claudia didn’t pick up, he was going to drive down to Crimson Pointe and—

“What’s up, little brother?”

“What’s up?” Johnny bit out, pitching his voice low because he wasn’t convinced this apartment hadn’t been bugged. “What’s up is someone tried to grab Carly Corinthos last night, and Jason came to the club looking for me—”

Her voice sharpened. “Are you somewhere safe? Does he think you were involved?”

Johnny stood still as the truth sank in. “What the hell are you up to, Claudie? I know Dad wouldn’t sanction this, and Jason knows it, too—”

“You don’t need to worry about any of that—”

“The hell I don’t—maybe Jason wouldn’t slit my throat, but he’s not the only guy around. I get the feeling that there are people who wouldn’t mind seeing me down for the count just to stick it to Dad. Did you go after Carly?”

“No. Oh my God, John, why would you think I’d do anything to put you in danger?”

“Because everyone is banking on Jason Morgan being a soft family man, and I think that’s a fucking mistake,” Johnny retorted. “The fact that he has a family makes him more dangerous, and if he doesn’t come for me, he’s coming for you, Claudie. And I don’t think he’s gonna care that you have tits.”

“Don’t be so crude, John—”

“And don’t be such a bitch. You told me to come up here—” Johnny closed his eyes. “Fuck me, I’m a plant, aren’t I? This is all a game. You sent me here knowing that anytime you tried something, Jason would come to me looking for information. You wanted to see his reaction.”

“You’ve always had an active imagination, little brother. I wasn’t ready for Jason to kill Daddy yet, and I knew you being there would buy me time—”

“Being an unwitting source was just the icing on top?” Johnny demanded. “It stops now. I’m going to tell Jason—”

“I wouldn’t do that.”

Her voice had flattened and the hairs on Johnny’s neck stood on end. “Claudia.”

“You think I haven’t been keeping tabs on you? I know you’re enjoying your life up there. Running that club, looking at your investments to see if Jason will let you buy into it. You think I don’t know you’re planning on throwing in with Morgan?”

Johnny looked out the window, his heart beating faster. How the hell could she have known any of that—

“I know you too well, little brother. You went to Port Charles to get away from Daddy, and you found something you liked. Keep your mouth shut and I won’t ruin it for you. If everything goes the way I want it to, Daddy won’t be a problem anymore for either of us.”

Johnny swallowed hard. “You’re framing Dad for all of this, aren’t you? Just like Dad framed Ric?”

“I learned from the best, didn’t I?”

“What stops me from going to Jason right now?” Johnny demanded. “Why shouldn’t I turn you in? Make the truce real—”

“Because I know that cute little blonde likes hot chocolate and walks along Elm Street Pier before starting her shift.”

The chill slide down his spine as Johnny struggled for form words. “What are you talking about?”

“Now, I know you’ll tell me you and Nurse Nadine have only had two dates, but I know you, little brother. You’re a romantic, and those pink roses you sent to her today—she loved them. I know which vase she used and where those flowers are. Right next to her bed. Have you been in yet yet? That yellow comforter looks soft.”

Johnny closed his eyes. “She has nothing to do with this—”

“No, she doesn’t. But if you even sniff at Jason before I’m ready to make my move, I’ll make her the star. I’m doing this for us, John, even if you can’t see it. I’m not planning to hurt Jason or anyone else. I just want what’s mine and what Daddy refuses to give me. You don’t want the business. It should be mine. You don’t have to do anything but sit there and let it happen.”

“Don’t hurt her, Claudia. Please.” He didn’t even know Nadine that well beyond her pretty smile and sparkling eyes, but he’d be damned if she’d end up as part of all this because of his sick and twisted sister.

“It’s all in your hands, little brother. I’ll be in touch.”

The line went dead, and Johnny stared at his phone for a long moment. What the hell was he supposed to do? If he made one move towards Jason, Claudia would know.

And unlike Jason, Claudia wasn’t bluffing. She’d let John live for betraying her, but Nadine would pay the price. Just like his mother had when she’d tried to step between Johnny and his father.

He couldn’t let another woman suffer for him. Jason was going to have to solve the problems in his organization himself. Johnny only hoped that Claudia wasn’t lying this time.

But that was the trouble with Claudia. Even when she was telling the truth, she somehow managed to lie.

Rain Lounge: Bar

“You know,” Lucas said as he and Dante approached the bar to get a round of drinks. “I gotta say, I was surprised when Lu said you were coming tonight.”

“Yeah?” Dante gestured at the bartender. “Three appletinis,” he said, “a virgin Mary, and two raspberry margaritas.” He focused on Lucas again. “Why?”

“I don’t know. It’s a gay bar.” Lucas shrugged. “You’re a cop.” When Dante grimaced, Lucas shook his head. “You’re a cop, Falconieri. Don’t start. You’re just on a break.”

“Yeah, well—” Dante laid his credit card on the bar so the bartender could put it on his tab. “I wish I could have found a way to tell Brooke that I supported her. She should be here tonight.”

“Yeah.” Lucas looked back at their table where Kyle and Felix were talking about something in Kyle’s pre-med program while Lulu and Maxie laughed. “A year ago, I thought Kyle was an asshole. He was one of the reasons I didn’t wanna go out that night, you know? I just figured he’d be a dick. With Maxie dating him, it made me want to forget ever telling anyone.”

He shook his head. “When Brooke told me—when she realized I was gay—I thought—this was great. I wasn’t going to have to hide. We could—we could support each other. I’m sorry neither of us ever got the chance to do that.”

The bartender set the tray of drinks down and took the credit card away. Lucas lifted the tray and started back towards the table, but Dante frowned because he thought—

He thought he saw someone he knew at the other end of the bar.

“I’ll be right there,” Dante told Lucas who looked back at him. He started to walk over just as the man turned and froze.

“Cruz?”

His roommate and best friend swallowed hard. “Dante. Uh. What are you—”

Dante gestured towards the table. “I’m here with Lu and her friends. It’s Felix’s birthday—” He hesitated. “You, uh, alone?”

“Yeah.” Cruz cleared his throat. “Yeah. I just wanted to, uh—”

“You can come over and hang with us if you want.” Dante lifted his brows. “I mean, we got the space, and you know everyone.”

“Hey, what’s taking—” Maxie bounced up to them and then blinked at Cruz. Then she grinned. “Hey! I thought Dante said you had to work!”

“I, uh, got my shift covered,” Cruz said, his cheeks flushing at being caught in an obvious lie.

Lulu joined them, sliding an arm through Dante’s. “You should come over and help us settle an argument,” she said. “Kyle—who is wrong—says that the best song ever written was Hotel California.”

“Hotel California?” Cruz winced. “Oh, man.”

“Right? I tried to explain that everyone knows that ‘N Sync is the greatest band ever—” When Cruz just looked at Dante helplessly, Maxie erupted into giggles. “Oh, man, your faces! Come on, Cruz. Help me gang up on this sad man who needs our help.”

Maxie reached for his arm and Cruz allowed himself to be led over to the table, as Dante and Lulu followed in the wake of Hurricane Maxie who never knew how to let anyone sit by themselves when they could be with friends.

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Jason set the takeout containers on the desk when he came in that night, smiling at the sight of Elizabeth on the sofa with Cameron. He was awake and she was reading to him from one of the travel books Jason had read to Michael when he was a baby. He’d recognize those dogeared pages anywhere.

“Hey,” Elizabeth said, pausing on a section about the crocodiles of Egypt. “I wasn’t expecting you home yet. Where’d you stop for dinner?”

“Eli’s,” he said. He hung up his jacket and locked up the gun. “You said this morning you were thinking about ribs.”

“Mmmm, that does sound good.” Elizabeth marked the page and set the book aside.

“How was the hospital?” Jason asked, bringing the containers over and sitting down. “Any news on the surgery?”

“Yeah, Monica is going down to Temple next week to observe one of the procedures and meet with the doctor who’s going to be performing it.” Elizabeth went over to set Cameron in the bassinet by the fireplace. “June 28.”

Jason frowned. “June 28?” Something about that day stuck in his head and he couldn’t remember why.

“They gave me a few dates to work with, and I picked that one.” Elizabeth paused. “It’s the day we found Carly and I had the embolism.” She twisted her wedding ring. “It felt, I don’t know, symbolic. I can’t face Ric and make him pay for what he did to me, but I can be done with the rest of it. Exactly one year later. And then I won’t have to think about him anymore.”

“I’m looking forward to that,” Jason agreed.

“Exactly. I’ll have to be in the hospital for about a week after the surgery, but Monica said as long as there aren’t any complications, I’ll be good around the beginning of August. Which—” Elizabeth paused and smiled. “I thought maybe we could use those tickets to Italy. We’ll take Cameron with us. Dr. Devlin said he was doing great, and should be okay to travel.”

“And we’ll be back before classes start at PCU,” Jason reminded her, and she nodded.

“Exactly. That’s what I want. I want this condition to be gone, at least as best as possible. I’ll need to be on blood thinners pretty much forever,” she said with a grimace. “And there’s a possibility I’ll develop hypertension again, so if we do end having more children, I’ll have to keep a close eye on all of that. I won’t ever—” Her throat tightened. “It won’t ever really be gone, but it’s as close to a cure as possible.”

It killed him that all the money in the world couldn’t really take this weight off her. Jason drew her in for a hug, kissing her forehead. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. It really is. I’ve been feeling better since Cameron was born, and Monica said that my vitals are better now than they’ve been since before I got pregnant. I’m okay.” She squeezed his hand. “I’ll go get something to drink.”

He had the dinners set up when she returned with a bottle of beer for him and a glass of water for herself. “You haven’t asked about last night,” Jason said after they’d eaten and he began to clean up.

“If there’s something I need to know, then you’ll tell me.” Elizabeth drew her brows together. “Is there something I need to know?”

“Maybe.” Jason paused, then wiped his hands on a napkin. “Richie’s gone. Along with another guard. I think they set up last night.”

Elizabeth drew in a sharp breath. “Richie set Carly up to be kidnapped?”

“Yeah. Looks like your instincts were good,” he said. “He couldn’t be trusted. Even with security on the club. I don’t know—” He paused. “I don’t know who he’s working for or if this was something he did on his own, but when I wanted to ask him more questions—he was in the wind.”

“That’s disappointing,” Elizabeth grumbled. She leaned back against the sofa, drawing her legs up. “Carly and I were thinking that something wasn’t right. She said it didn’t even really feel like a real kidnapping attempt. Like whoever it was hadn’t tried hard enough.”

“Yeah. That’s what I think, too. I think whoever it was wants me to go after Anthony Zacchara.” Jason’s mouth twisted. “I just wish I knew who or why.” He looked at her. “I might have to go down to Crimson Pointe. Anthony will just lie if I do this on the phone or refuse to come here. If it’s not him, it’s someone who’s trying like hell to see him dead.”

“He might be invested in knowing who that is,” Elizabeth reminded him. “When will you go?”

“I’m going to try to track down Richie first. I want to know more before I go. Maybe on Monday or Tuesday.” Jason shook his head. “Every time I think we’re out of this, something else happens.”

“You’ll figure it out, and then maybe things will be actually quiet and calm. I mean, I know things have been for a while, but it hasn’t felt real,” Elizabeth said. “Since you told me Ric was dead and it was over, I couldn’t really let myself believe it. It’s just felt like the quiet before a storm.”

“I know what you mean.” He leaned back and stretched his arm along the back of the sofa, then she curled in his side. He stroked her hair, and they sat in comforting silence — until Cameron fussed for his next bottle, and his phone rang with news from Francis that Richie and Chuck had emptied their bank accounts on their way out of town. No mistake about it — they’d been involved and were now on the run.

How many more snakes were in his organization? Jason wondered as Elizabeth snuggled up next to him to feed Cameron. Would he be able to find them all and keep his family safe?

Lexington House: Living Room

Claudia peered through a slit in the front curtains, glaring at the suburban houses on the street. “I hate this place,” she muttered. She turned to find Ric studying blueprints on the table. “How many times are you going to look through those? There’s no way into the Towers.”

“There’s always a way,” Ric muttered. “You find those guards yet?”

“Not yet,” Claudia said darkly. As soon as they’d fallen under suspicion, Richie and Chuck had disappeared, likely knowing that with their cover blown, Claudia had no use for them. She needed to find them first before they could report to Jason about her dealings. And it went without saying that Jason was looking for them, too.

She was feeling restless. Time was running out, and Ric was procrastinating, looking for the perfect plan to snatch Elizabeth and the kid. Ric had been a useful tool, she reflected, and she’d delighted in watching Jason and Sonny fall apart over the mere mention of him.

But he was a perfectionist. He’d made a mistake the year before when he hadn’t killed Carly’s little demon child. If the little bastard hadn’t seen Ric and been able to tell Jason and Sonny that Ric had snatched his mother, everything would have been different. They would have searched for her longer—blah, blah.

She’d heard it over and over again.

She knew better. You couldn’t make anything perfect. You just had to seize your opportunities.

It was time to seize hers.

“I’m telling you,” Claudia said to Ric. “Jason is suspicious. Right now he doesn’t know exactly what’s going on, but he thinks I’m involved.” And eventually he’d take those suspicions to Anthony or Johnny would decide that he could protect his lady love better if he had more power.

“I warned you pretending to kidnap Carly wouldn’t work,” Ric said. “Not only did you end up blowing both your inside sources, but you did it yourself. Carly probably already identified you—”

“I’m working with it. Every failure gives us more information. Jason’s smarter than I thought he’d be. I thought he’d immediately go for Daddy.” But he hadn’t. He was patient and smart. A combination that Claudia whole-heartedly hated.

She had to force Jason into action. Had to make him get up and do something. If she could get her hands on the wife—

Claudia looked back at Ric. “How much do you want Elizabeth?”

Ric frowned at her. “What are you talking about?”

“You want revenge on her, sure, but wouldn’t it be more fun to torture her first?” Claudia asked. She sat down. “What if we can find a way to make sure Jason leaves the kid alone? That he’s not with either of them. You want the kid more than you want her.”

Ric’s mouth tightened. “She’s going to keep her promise to me.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Absolute psycho, Claudia decided. “The kid never leaves the penthouse. One of them is always with him. If we can grab Elizabeth, Jason will absolutely go after her—”

“That doesn’t solve my problem of getting inside—”

“And that’s where you should have trusted me.” Her lips curved into a wicked smile. “Because Zander Smith gave me three names, and he was right on the money. Little Mikey is still working for Jason, and he’s already on my payroll. I just haven’t called him up from the minors yet. And guess where Mikey works.”

Ric’s eyes burned into hers. “The Towers.”

“In the security room.” Claudia folded her arms. “We grab the kid, and Jason will go straight for my father. He won’t have a choice. Even if he thinks I’m behind it, he’ll still go for Daddy. Maybe he kills him, maybe he won’t. But I can be there when it happens, and I’ll finish the job and make it look like he did. And Elizabeth will have to live with the fact that her precious miracle baby is in your hands.”

And then Jason would hunt Ric to the ends of the earth to get his son back, Claudia thought. Which meant it would be in Claudia’s interest to deliver Ric to Jason in exchange for letting her take over her father’s business.

Everyone would win in the end.

Well, except for Ric, but those were the breaks.

All they had to do was wait for the little bitch to leave the penthouse and give them an opening.

August 14, 2022

Update Link: Watch Me Burn – Part 6

ETA: As you guys know, I prep these posts in advance. Halfway through writing, Lauren’s husband called me. He wants me to speak at her service. We spent about a half hour talking about what’s happened, how we’re doing. And I had to press pause, obviously, on the writing. So it’s a bit late and I don’t know how long it’s going to take. I have a set amount of scenes to do today, so I’m just going to write until they’re done.


Moving into the final two full weeks of summer vacation, which is a bit sad, honestly. Thanks to the doctor appointments and tests, I don’t really feel like I’ve had a lot of time to relax. Every single week, I had something scheduled. And then, of course, last week felt like a fog. Once again, thanks for the kind words. Writing really helped me process and tune out when I needed to.

I’m planning to update Scars three times this coming week to get back on track. I’d wanted to update yesterday, but I didn’t sleep well, and woke up late with a migraine. I just wasn’t in the right frame of mind to write anything.

This upcoming week might be a bit wonky, I’m probably going to update early in the morning for Flash Fiction Mon-Wed, and there’s a chance I’ll miss Thursday. Having an early lunch with my mom (we haven’t seen each other all summer because it’s too damn hot to leave the house), I have orientation with my school on Tuesday, and then my wisdom teeth on Wednesday. I’m only getting one tooth pulled, so it shouldn’t be the insane recovery that you’d get with all four, so we’ll see.

Mad World is scheduled and goes live at 7 AM on Tuesday, Thursday, and Sat until August 25 so if I miss posting an update to the main blog (which triggers the emails), you can come to the site and check the sidebar for the most recent chapters.

See you tomorrow.