Still harder getting up, getting dressed, living with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade, give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken
– What Hurts The Most, Rascal Flatts

---

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

 Port Charles Airport: Entrance Hall

“It’s about time,” Lucky grumbled when his brother finally joined him and Sam at the baggage claim. “What took so long?”

“I called the nanny in California,” Nikolas said with a roll of his eyes. “And if it bothered you to wait, you should have let me upgrade you to first class.”

“Believe me, I tried to convince him,” Sam muttered, folding her arms. She rolled her neck. “I haven’t flown economy in years.”

Lucky rolled his eyes. “We’re not arguing about this again. If we’d all wanted first class, we’d have to wait for another flight. I’ve already waited long enough to come back.”

“Easy for you to say, you had the aisle seat.” Sam rubbed her shoulder. “Are we getting a cab or—”

“I called a service,” Nikolas murmured, scanning the small group of drivers with placards in their hands. “There,” he said, nodding towards one with his last name scrawled in heavy black marker. “There’s the car.”

“Great.” Lucky lifted his duffel bag, slid the strap over his shoulder, then reached for Sam’s bag. “Did you call ahead, reserve rooms at the hotel? Or did you change your mind about opening up Wyndemere?”

“I decided not to make a reservation.” Nikolas took a deep breath. “I thought you’d be better off with the element of surprise.”

“He means if Nikolas made a reservation for two rooms, Carly would tell Jason in about ten seconds,” Sam offered with a smirk. “She can’t stay out of his business even if her life depended on it. And Jason would warn Liz, and they’d lawyer up—”

Lucky grimaced. “Yeah, okay, you’re right. Element of surprise is best. You’ll head over to Shadybrooke?” he asked Nikolas. “Start Mom’s paperwork?”

“Yeah. After you make contact with Elizabeth, I’ll call Bobbie. Are you starting with her or—”

“No. I’m gonna need a little backup, and I don’t think Aunt Bobbie is going to be interested in taking my side.” Lucky paused. “But I know exactly who I can count on.”

Kelly’s: Dining Room

Maxie snatched up the paper bag with the lunch she’d ordered and whirled around, prepared to dash back out and hurry back to the office.

Instead she ran into a solid mass—”Oof! Watch where you’re—” She blinked, looking up at the familiar face. “Oh. Nikolas. Where did you come from?”

Nikolas stepped back. “The airport. Where are you going in such a hurry?”

“Back to work—oh, but if you’re home, you must have—” Maxie faltered when she saw Nikolas look away. “Oh. Right. You…you said you’d be back in a few weeks for your mother. That’s why you’re here.”

“Among other things. A few loose threads to tie up.” Nikolas gestured to a table. “And since I ran into you, do you have a minute?”

“Kate will understand when I tell her I ran into you.” Maxie dropped into a chair. “How’s Lulu? Has there been any improvement?”

“No. The doctors—they’re considering the protocol Robin gave my mother a few years ago, hoping that it might have better results since the condition is newer but I don’t know—I don’t know if I can even have her back temporarily if it means I have to watch her slip away again.”

Maxie swallowed her protest. She didn’t understand that. How could you not want one more minute with your sister? How could you not do anything you could to bring her back, even just to say goodbye—

She plastered a smile on her face. “We’re saving a space for her. Her desk is there, and the job. Everything is just as she left it at Crimson, waiting for her to come back with terrible fashion sense. She’ll get better, Nikolas. She has to.”

“It’s hard to keep the hope alive,” Nikolas admitted, “but I appreciate everything you’re doing here. It’s just—well, I’m not entirely uninformed as to what’s been happening here in Port Charles. We’ve had some news from Bobbie, from Alexis. But I’m sure you’ll have your own perspective on what I’ve been told.”

Maxie bit her lip, picked at her cuticle. “What’s the subject? I’ve been at the penthouse, so I know Elizabeth and the kids are living there now like a happy family so if Lucky’s home for custody, he’ll have an uphill battle.”

“That’s—that’s one aspect of what I wanted to know. What he’ll want to know. But the other?” Nikolas leaned forward. “Nadine and Johnny. What do you know?”

Maxie opened her mouth, thought of that conversation with Johnny, her promise, and then thought of Lulu, sitting in a room, trapped in her mind, waiting to return to a world that had moved on without her.

A world that hadn’t waited more than a handful of days.

“Oh, I know plenty. How much time do you have?”

Nadine’s Apartment: Living Room

Johnny pulled the door open, then scowled when he saw Claudia on the other side. “Oh, come on. I just told you—”

“The nurse is at work, right? You’re sure—”

“She has a name, and yes—” Johnny made a face when his sister walked right past him. “You’re not staying—”

“Just—” Claudia put up a hand. “Just give me—” She frowned, her dark eyes sweeping over the small space, then swung around to face him. “This is where you live? Really?”

“I’m not in the mood for this, Claudie—” He closed the door. “If you came to insult me or Nadine—”

“No. Not at all. Just—you get money from the trust every month. You can afford better—” Claudia narrowed her eyes. “She’s really not into the money? Not even a little bit?”

“I know that’s weird for you. But she’s not interested in anything she didn’t earn.” He went to the fridge and pulled out water. “You’ve got three minutes—”

“No.” Claudia pursed her lips, began to recalculate her opinion of the nurse. She had to play this just right, get Johnny on her side. To see that her side was his side. Jerry was right. The nurse was the key. “It was your idea to do this, wasn’t it? To get married. Not hers.”

Johnny twisted off the cap, took a long sip. Said nothing. She nodded, then wandered over to a metal shelving unit next to the television. It was packed with books, CDs, and other pieces of clutter. “You had to convince her, didn’t you? You suggested it, and she didn’t agree right away.”

He made a face, and she knew she was right. “What’s your point?” he wanted to know. “Did you come here to make fun of me?”

“No. No. Listen. When you told me you’d married Nadine Crowell, the mouthy blonde who’d been put in jail for contempt at your trial, I was worried. She seemed like the kind of white knight who believed in honor and doing right. So I figured you’d paid her off or something. Maybe promised to fund one of her causes. Or set her up in luxury if she kept her mouth shut. But you’re living in a place the size of a cardboard box, and she’s still working the same twelve hour shifts—”

“How do you know that?” Johnny demanded. “Are you having her watched?”

“Come on, John. You think Dad didn’t put a tail on you? On her?” Claudia slid her hands into the pockets of her leather jacket, tipped her head. “He knows everything. He knows Nadine goes to work in the same way she did before that day. That you guys go out and do things together. But what he will never understand is why you married her. She’s a witness. You pay them off, you make them disappear. But you don’t marry them.”

“Nadine wouldn’t—”

“She wouldn’t take the money, and you’re too soft for the other option.” She nodded. “So there’s a third reason. And that’s because you like her. You’re protecting her. Making sure Dad sees her as a team player. I just don’t understand why she’s protecting you. What is she getting out of this?”

“You don’t need to understand why. All you need to know is Nadine is off limits. End of story.”

“You know better, John. You need to make sure you know exactly what Nadine wants from you, because the second you can’t deliver, she’ll turn on you—”

“She won’t. She’s not like that,” Johnny snapped, and Claudia took a deep breath, looked away.

“I wish I could believe. I wish you could believe that, but it’s not a risk either of us can take. Not anymore.”

Johnny went still. “What are you talking about?”

General Hospital: Maternity Ward

Patrick paced nervously in front of the nurse’s station, glancing down the hall and then at the elevator every few minutes. In a room ten feet away, Robin was preparing to deliver their child inside a hospital that he realized he didn’t trust even a little bit.

It had been weeks since Elizabeth’s overdose, and she’d been the only confirmed case of sabotage, but Patrick couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d missed something. That Spinelli’s efforts wouldn’t protect them forever and they hadn’t done enough to find the culprits. Now, his world was centered on just two people — Robin and their daughter.

And Patrick knew he couldn’t put his faith in the system that he trusted for every other patient that walked through the door.

The elevator doors slid open, and Nadine stepped out, winding her stethoscope around her neck. “Patrick, hey, Epiphany said you needed me.” Her blue eyes swept the area before focusing on him. “I’m supposed to be in the ER today—”

“I reassigned you. You are the only nurse that I’m putting on Robin’s case.” He took her by the arm, steered her towards the room where Mac and Anna were already by Robin’s side. “Any medicine? You’re administering it. You’re double checking the epidural—”

“Whoa, Patrick—” Nadine stopped him before they went in. “That’s Andy’s job—”

“But you’ll be getting the meds from the dispensary.” His fingers gripped her upper arm. “You’ll double check and test them. Triple check them. Nothing goes in Robin or my child without you.”

Nadine searched his expression. “What’s going on?” she asked softly. “You’re terrified, and not just because you’re about to be a father. I thought you said they’d handled the problems with the machines—”

“We did, but—” Patrick stopped as Anna approached, forcing himself to smile. “Anna, you know Nadine.”

“I do.” Anna tipped her head. “Is everything all right? You look upset.”

“I’m—” He dragged a hand through his already disheveled dark hair. “I’m fine. I just, you know, jitters. We’ve been prepping for this day for months and now it’s here and there’s nothing I can do now.”

Anna squinted slightly, but then relaxed. “Well, I’d better step aside and let Nadine do her job.”

“I’ll give Robin a quick look over, and then page Andy to make sure he’s ready.” Nadine squeezed Patrick’s arm. “You can count on me, you know that.”

“Yeah, I know.”

Nadine slid past them both and went to Robin, a bright smile on her face. Anna turned back to Patrick. “Please don’t think you’ve fooled me, Patrick. Something is going on.”

“Nerves—”

“My daughter is the most precious person in the world to me, and she’s carrying my grandchild. Your child. I know you would do nothing to put her safety at risk. But if there’s something I should know, some way I can help—”

“There’s not.” Patrick took a deep breath. “We’d better get back inside.”

Nadine’s Apartment: Living Room

Johnny stared at her, his blood running cold. “What the hell are you talking about? What’s Dad planning?”

“Nothing—”

“Claudia—” He came forward, grabbed her elbow. “Damn it, tell me what he wants with Nadine!”

“Nothing! I swear! This isn’t like Lulu. Nadine’s not a wild card or an idiot. Dad would never admit it, but Nadine’s proved that she’s on your side. Getting arrested for contempt at the trial, sticking by you the last few weeks and not crumbling, and most of all, how she handled him the day you guys came up. He respects her—”

“The hell he does. What the hell is Dad planning?” Johnny demanded.

“It’s not him! He doesn’t like you being far away, but he knows you’re safe.” She licked her lips. “He’s not the problem. Do you think I’d be this worried if he was?”

Christ, no. She wasn’t just worried, she was terrified. “Hey. Hey. Claudia, whatever it is—” He started towards her.

“We’ll fix it?” she finished for him. “No. No one can come after either of us without pissing off our dear father. You’re the son, the cherished heir, and well, even if he can’t stand me, he wouldn’t be able to tolerate the disrespect. I told you, you’ve got nothing to worry about from Dad. Not this time.”

“Then what is it?”

Claudia looked away, grimaced. “Listen. You need to go to Jason. Tell him you want to work for him—”

“I don’t—”

“You do if you want to keep you and that nurse safe,” she cut in sharply, and he closed his mouth. “You go to work for Jason, and you wait for further orders.”

“Claudia, damn it, there’s no way in hell I’m doing that.” Johnny released her with disgust crawling at his throat. “I’m not turning against Jason. Not after everything he’s done for me. Whatever you’re involved in, you need to do it without me.”

“Do you think I want it this way? If I could get in with Jason myself, I’d do it, okay? But I can’t even seduce him.” She rolled her eyes, some of the fear in her eyes giving way to irritation. “He’s too hung up on his own nurse. What is it with you idiots and the health care profession—”

“Claudia.”

She made a face. “Look, if you’re not going to help me, then what happens next is on you.”

“What does that mean?” Johnny demanded. “What’s going to happen next? You said it yourself. No one’s coming after you or me—”

“Your protection doesn’t include Miss Mary Sunshine,” Claudia said and Johnny went still.  “They can use her. And they will. If you don’t go to work for Jason, Nadine’s the one on the chopping block.”

“Damn it, Claudia! Tell me what’s going on! Tell me what they have that has you so scared—”

“You know. You’ve always known it, deep down.” She looked at him for a long moment, waited for the truth to bloom in his expression. She saw it in the twitch of a muscle in his cheek, the way his fists clenched at his side. “I made a mistake. And if Dad finds out, I’ll be expendable. You know that. So I need to make sure no one ever finds out. Including Nadine. If she knew Johnny, would she protect me? Protect you?”

“No,” he managed. He looked away, swallowed hard. “No, she wouldn’t.” He dipped his head. “I’m not doing it, Claudia. You need to figure this out for yourself. You got yourself into trouble, and whatever you did, it wasn’t my fault. It wasn’t, and I won’t let you make it mine. I’ve got something good here, and I won’t let this family ruin it.”

He stalked over to the door, yanked it open. “So go home and fix your problems yourself.”

Claudia stared at him for a long moment and nodded. “All right, baby brother. I’ll let you sit with this if you need to. But ask yourself—” She stopped on the threshold, looked back at him. “Where’s your wife right now? Are you sure she’s okay? Because you’d better get used to feeling that way. You won’t know a second of peace if you’re not with her.”

“Claudia—”

“Think it over. You’ll see that the only way for you to keep her safe is for us to work together.”

General Hospital: Hallway

“You know, just because he’s chief of staff, he thinks he’s special and can go around questioning everyone—”

Nadine sighed, and followed Andy Archer, the on-call anesthesiologist out of the drug locker. “Andy, that’s not what he’s doing. You know that. It’s his first kid. How many first dads have we dealt with? You know doctors and nurses make the worst patients. We know too much.”

Andy grimaced. “I can get my own meds—”

“I know. But Patrick feels better when all meds go through one person. Let’s just humor him, okay?” Even if Nadine didn’t understand why he was so focused on it, she’d back Patrick without blinking. He didn’t ask for much. “You know Patrick. He likes you.”

“Yeah. Yeah, okay, but you tell him that I don’t appreciate it,” Andy muttered. “Page me when she’s ready for her dose.”

“I will. Should be no more than ten minutes. Thanks, Andy. You’re the best.”

Nadine locked the dispensary door, then turned around, jumping when she found Nikolas right behind her. “Oh my God, you scared the crap out of me! When did you get back—” Her breath caught. “Oh, you’re back! Does that mean—”

“Does that mean my sister is awake and knows what you did?” he said.

Nadine closed her mouth, cleared her throat. “Does that mean Lulu is doing better?” she asked, but the pit was growing in her stomach. There was always another confrontation, always someone who wanted to judge her.

And today, oh, God, today it was Nikolas.

“No. For which you should be grateful. I can’t imagine what it’s going to do for Lulu to come out of this and realize the man she loved didn’t wait a week for her—what the hell, Nadine? What were you thinking? You married him?”

Nadine hesitated. “It’s not that simple—”

Nikolas wrapped his hand around her wrist, jerked it up so that he could see the ring on her left ring finger. “Looks that simple to me. What, I didn’t want you anymore, so you went for the next rich guy who’d have you—”

Nadine jerked her hand out of his grasp. “You didn’t want me,” she repeated. “Which means I don’t owe you any answers. And before you even try it, Lulu and I weren’t even close. I didn’t owe anyone anything.”

“There are words for women like you—”

“You should know. That’s how you got your son, isn’t it?” Nadine bit out. His nostrils flared, and she found it in her to keep going. To keep pushing. “Oh, it’s not so fun when the tables are turned on you, is it? You gotta a lot of nerve waltzing back here like you didn’t up and leave without a word—you didn’t want me, Nikolas. Something you didn’t bother to tell me. I didn’t even know whatever we had was over until you decided to leave. But you don’t like to end things, do you? You sure as hell didn’t bother to end things with your wife before sleeping with someone else’s!”

“You have no right to speak of Emily that way—”

“You have no right to speak to me this way. Or to Johnny. You shoved him out of your sister’s life. You shoved me out. And now you’re complaining because we moved on together? Make up your damn mind, Nikolas. Or you know what? No. You told me once it was exhausting to know me. Well, same goes, buddy. Stay away from me.”

She shoved him aside and stalked down the hallway, leaving him sputtering behind her.

Hardy House: Living Room

Audrey plumped another set of pillows, then smiled when she found a yellow Lego piece sticking up from between the cushions of the sofa. It was good to be home where finding clues to the existence of her great-grandchildren were lovely surprises, and not a constant state of being.

It had been a bittersweet parting that morning, leaving the three most important people in her life behind after living with them for a month, but Audrey had accomplished her goal. To look after her granddaughter, to care for the boys, and to gain a better understanding of the man Elizabeth had chosen.

Audrey crossed to the mantel where a photograph of Steve and Audrey on their wedding day sat, next to Elizabeth’s senior portrait from high school. “How proud you’d be of our Lizzie,” she murmured, touching her husband’s face. “She’s forged her own path, just as you always said she would, and she’s happier for it. I do wish you were here to see her.” Maybe Steve would have tempered Audrey’s worry, and she’d have supported Elizabeth long ago.

But Audrey had muddled about on her own, and while it had taken far too long, she felt sure that she’d made the correct choice.

The ringing of the doorbell drew Audrey from her contemplations, and she hurried to answer it, wondering if it was Bobbie or Felicia stopping by to welcome her home.

Instead, it was the very last person she’d expected or wanted to see. Standing on her front step was the man who’d walked out nearly five weeks earlier.

Audrey lifted her chin. “You have exactly thirty seconds to tell me why I should not simply close the door in your face, Lucky Spencer.”

I’m holding on your rope, got me ten feet off the ground
And I’m hearing what you say, but I just can’t make a sound
You tell me that you need me then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you’re sorry, didn’t think I’d turn around, and say (that)
It’s too late to apologize (it’s too late)
I said, It’s too late to apologize (it’s too late)
– Apologize, OneRepublic

---

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Crimson: Lobby

Kate stepped off the elevator, hesitating when she spied Carly standing near Lulu’s empty desk. The other woman was looking at a photo Lulu had left there — Lulu with her mother. “Carly?”

“Kate. Hey.” Carly set the photo down, slid her fingers over the desk. “You still…you didn’t pack up her things?”

“No. I suppose I still…” Kate slid her sunglasses into the case in her hand. “I want it to be here when she comes home. I don’t want her to think any of us gave up hope. Have you heard something?”

“No. No, unless something has changed since my mother spoke to Lucky last week.” Carly looked at her. “I didn’t come about Lulu, but I—I’m glad her things are here. That she has a place to come back to. She’ll get better. She has to. She’s too young, too strong.” She took a deep breath. “I’m here about Sonny.”

Kate carefully set her purse on Maxie’s desk, folded her arms to hide how her hands were shaking. “About Sonny.”

“I know we don’t…that we didn’t always get along. And most of it’s my fault.” Carly closed her eyes. “It usually is. And I should have…I don’t know…kept you in the loop better on his care the last month. But I know you were in recovery, and maybe I was just in denial. Hoping for a miracle.”

“He came to the hospital to see me that last day.” Kate’s eyes shimmered with unshed tears. “Olivia turned him away. It keeps me up at night, Carly, wondering what if he’d made it upstairs. Maybe I could have…maybe it would all be different.”

“I—” Carly looked down at her hands, twisted the ring on her finger. “I know. Jax—he told me. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry—He did this because of me—”

“He did it because he could,” Kate interrupted, and Carly looked up.  “You and Sonny did what you did, and Jax had every right to handle his relationship with you how he saw fit. But I also had that right, and Jax knew what I had chosen. He ignored my wishes. I’ll never be able to forgive him for that.” She took a deep breath, then flicked away the tear that had slid past her lashes. “I don’t imagine you’re here to commiserate about Jax. Has—” She pressed her fist just above her belly, seeming to brace herself. “Has Sonny’s prognosis changed?”

“No. No. He’s still in the same stable, but…comatose condition. The hospital is asking me about long-term care. They could keep supporting him there. He wouldn’t even be their only long-term patient,” she added. “But they’re not really equipped for the round of clock care he’d need, and he should have the best. If there’s ever going to be any hope—anyway.” Carly cleared her throat. “I talked to Jason, and we—I thought Silver Water was the best plan. He’d be with Michael.”

“Sonny spoke highly of the place when he told me about it. Of course he never thought—” Kate’s voice faltered, and she paused, gathered herself. “Thank you. For telling me.”

“I’ll let you know when the arrangements have been made. If you—I mean, you can—not that I’m giving you permission. We both know that it should be you making these arrangements. I mean, it’s supposed to be Jason, but I just—I’ll tell you when.”

“I appreciate that, Carly. Really. None of this has been easy. The last six months, since that terrible day, maybe even before that—I think we’ve all done the best we could have.”

“Maybe. I hope so. I want that to be the truth. Um, Morgan. He asks about you sometimes. He doesn’t really understand where everyone’s gone. Emily. His brother. His father.” Carly looked away, barely managed to force out the next word. “Jax.”

“Carly—”

“He’s lost so many people. If you ever—I don’t know. I just thought you should know. You mattered to Morgan. To Michael. To Sonny. He really loved you. I’m sorry that I—I’m sorry that anything I did—that it made anything harder.”

“It’s all right, Carly—”

“It’s not but thank you for saying otherwise.”

They both looked towards the elevator when the doors slid open and Jax stepped out. He looked back and forth between the two women. “Ah, Carly. I wasn’t expecting you here—”

“I hope you weren’t looking for me,” Kate said, lifting her chin. “I said all I wanted in the hospital.”

“Kate—” But by the time Jax reached her, she’d gone into her office closing the door in his face.

He grimaced, looked back to find Carly watching him. “I suppose that makes you happy.”

Carly pressed her lips together, looked towards the elevator, then back at him. “Kate wasn’t thrilled about you keeping Sonny away from her. Good for her.”

“I had every right—”

“Do you think it makes it any better that you were right about Sonny?” Carly demanded. “That being around him, letting him in our lives in any way was only going to make things worse? Do you think that makes what you did okay?”

“I just—”

Carly headed for the elevators. “Brenda chose Sonny a lifetime ago, and you’ve never forgiven the rest of the female species for it—”

“You slept with him five months ago!” Jax reminded her, a flush rising in his cheeks. “You want to blame Brenda for all of this—”

“No. I just—” The righteousness faded from her expression, and her voice. She lifted her hand to her temple, rubbing. “I don’t. I don’t want to argue with you, Jax. I did a horrible thing. And you took that anger and used it to punish Kate for not listening to you, too. You got what you wanted, Jax. A world without Sonny. I hope it was worth it. I hope blaming me for Michael, for the miscarriage—”

Jolted, Jax’s eyes widened. “I don’t blame you for that—”

“Don’t you?” She stepped onto the car, and the doors closed on his distraught face.

Nadine’s Apartment: Kitchen

Not long after the shower had switched off, Nadine emerged from the bathroom, a towel wrapped around her torso, the ends tucked in at her breasts. She had her head to the side, towel drying her damp hair, and nearly missed Johnny standing right in front of her, a mug of coffee extended towards her.

“You’re—” She flicked cautious eyes at him. She tossed the hair towel in the hamper still visible through the open bathroom door, then reached for the coffee mug. “Up early.”

“I wanted to catch you before you left for work.” Johnny stepped back, grimacing when she edged away, backing towards the bedroom door. “And it’s almost ten—”

“Early for you,” she said, bringing the coffee to her lips. “Is everything okay—”

“I talked to Maxie. She’s going to leave us alone.”

Nadine furrowed her brow. “What?”

“Last night. I ran into her at Eli’s, and I thought about what you said. About not wanting to have issues with her because she’s—” He scratched the back of his neck, uncomfortable. “She’s not entirely wrong.”

Nadine’s lips parted, and she set the coffee on the counter, tugging the towel closer to her body. “I didn’t—I wasn’t expecting—”

“You made some good points the other day.” He leaned back against the counter, crossing his feet at the ankles, his arms folded, and his eyes trained on the floor. “And maybe I don’t think enough about what you’re dealing with at work. You don’t say much, and I thought maybe it was getting better.”

“It’s not your problem—”

He lifted his eyes to find her looking at him, red staining her cheeks. “It’s my problem because we’re supposed to be in this together. And maybe we’re not doing enough to think about next week. Or next month. You’re right. We don’t exactly have an exit strategy.”

She opened her mouth, then closed it, biting down. “Is that what you want to do? Come up with an exit plan? I don’t blame you. The PCPD hasn’t done much since they arrested you, so you’re good there, and your dad’s been quiet—”

“I was thinking maybe we don’t worry so much about the exit part of this.”

Nadine broke off her ramble, blinked at him. “What does that mean?”

“You said this is as complicated as we want it to be. I didn’t know what to say to you,” Johnny admitted. “Mostly because I didn’t think about it that way. We kind of got most of the bad stuff out of the way right away. My dad, the PCPD, Jason—and the last few weeks, it’s just been—” He made a face. “I don’t know. Whatever passes for normal. I was thinking about getting a job or finding something to do all day when you’re at work. Or something. But I wasn’t thinking about what happens when this is over. But if you need to have that in your head—”

“Just—just wait—” Nadine held up a hand and he closed his mouth. “I don’t understand what we’re doing here. I haven’t really understood any of this since that morning in Vegas when I lost my damn mind, or—”

“Any of the nights since?” Johnny prompted, straightening, the corners of his mouth twitching. “I could explain it, but you’d just get mad at me again—”

“It’s all just this giant mess, Johnny. And—” When her voice faltered, the humor he’d feeling faded. She sighed. “I don’t know how to fix it without screwing up my life even worse. I still—no, I know we made the right choice. To do whatever we could to stop the violence. I—” She met his eyes. “I went to see Jason. The morning you got arrested, and I looked at him, and I thought he’s helping us even though Sonny’s supposed to be his best friend. Because Jason knows you didn’t want to hurt anyone, and he just wants to keep his family safe. I realized I could help. That keeping you out of jail might keep your dad from going crazy again—I’ve never regretted that I decided to help you. To keep what I saw that day to myself.”

“Oh.” Johnny cleared his throat. “Oh. Well, that’s good—”

“It’s just hard because doing the right thing meant taking a jackhammer to everything else I’d built,” Nadine continued, and he grimaced again. “You know, Lu and Maxie and Spinelli — I liked them. And Regina and Leyla were my friends at work. And you were just someone I knew because of other people. And now none of that’s true anymore. I go to work, and Leyla thinks I’m gold-digging white trash, and it shouldn’t hurt because it’s not true, but it does. And Maxie thinks I’m a home wrecking slut—”

“She’s angry at the situation, and lashing out—”

“Johnny. We’re right back where we started. Because what are we doing?” she asked again. “We slept together. Repeatedly. And I think maybe you’re trying to fix things because you want things to go back to how they were a few days ago.”

Johnny rubbed his chest, made a face. “And that’s a bad thing?”

“No. Yes. No.” She closed her eyes, the damp strands of her hair falling around her face. She gripped the ends of the towel more tightly. “I’m just tired of starting over. I came here because Aunt Rayleen was gone, and I needed something different. I thought I’d try to do some good, balance the scales here. But all I’ve done since I got here is make everything worse.”

“That is not true.” Johnny came forward, shaking his head. He laid his hands on her shoulders, stroking down to her elbow, then back up again. “It’s not. And no one thinks that. No one who matters anyway. Spinelli doesn’t. Nikolas is alive because you nagged him into getting treated. I’m not in jail because of you. I’m a pretty big fan of that part. And—” He curled a finger beneath her chin, lifted it so that their eyes met. “It’s not a crime to like each other, Nadine. We’re not hurting anyone.”

“Lulu—”

He shook his head. “She’s not part of this. She can’t be. If that day on the pier didn’t happen, maybe things would be different. Maybe I’d still be trying to get through to Nikolas, I don’t know. I don’t want to think about it—I don’t. But I understand if she’s the reason you don’t want to keep things the way they were going. I can respect that.” He stepped back.

“It really should bother me,” she said, then dragged a hand down her face. “It should. But you never pretended any differently. I’ve never resented you or her — it’s such an awful situation,” she murmured. “So terrible for her family, for everyone who loves her. And it’s awful, but I have to be practical, Johnny. If she gets better and comes home—how do we explain this? And where exactly does that leave me?”

“If—if she gets better,” Johnny said, “it really wouldn’t change anything. Because I don’t get to change my last name. I don’t get to stop carrying around the baggage that is my family. Dad, Trevor, Claudia—they’re not going anywhere.” He waited a beat. “I don’t want to make promises I can’t keep, Nadine. It wouldn’t be fair to you. So like I said, if you need us to take a permanent step back, then we can do that. The sofa’s not too bad—”

“I just wish I knew what you were asking me. I wish you knew. Because if it’s just sex—”

“It’s not,” Johnny said immediately, and she just wrinkled her nose. “And if it was just that, I’d be laying it on a lot thicker to get back in that room. I could do that.”

Nadine rolled her eyes. “Oh, sure. Okay, Casanova.” She started past him, towards the bedroom, but he got there first, blocking her. When she scowled, he reached for the edge of her towel, tugging her gently so that their chests brushed.

“You’ve been standing here in your towel for almost twenty minutes, water sliding down—” Johnny followed the trail of one of those droplets, sliding his finger from the curve of her jaw down her collarbone, to the top of her breasts. “If it were just about sex, Nadine,” he murmured, his breath hot against her neck as he dipped his head down. “You and I both know that towel would be long gone.”

“It’s a little bit about sex, or you wouldn’t be doing this little demonstration right now,” Nadine said, pushing lightly on his chest so that he’d give her some breathing room. But she looked up and their eyes met again. She licked her lips. “And you being good in bed doesn’t even factor into this. We don’t need to keep complicating this situation.”

“You’re right. So—” Johnny reached down, found the knob and twisted it, so that the door opened at his back. He moved to the side. “Like I said, I’m not looking to talk you into something you don’t want.”

“You’re not talking me into anything.”

“Nope. I made my case, and the ball’s in your court.”

“Good. So that we understand each other.” Nadine stopped at the threshold, leaning against the opposite door jamb, her fingers still holding onto the towel. “Because I don’t want you to take credit for this.”

Johnny frowned. “Credit for—” But then she dropped the towel, fisted her hands in his shirt and pulled him into the room. “Oh, so we’re done talking?”

“We’re done talking.”

PCPD: Commissioner’s Office

Anna gripped the back of the visitor’s chair. “There’s something going on at the hospital, I’m convinced of it.”

Mac rifled through a filing cabinet, only half listening to his former sister-in-law. “I know Patrick’s had a lot of mess to clean up since the last chief of staff died.”

“And legal issues from a killer nurse,” Anna added. “All of that is interesting, but I’m talking about Jason Morgan.”

Mac frowned, looked at Anna with more interest. “Jason’s only connection these days is Elizabeth, and I don’t even think she’s back at work yet—”

“What about this accident after the wedding? You told me that Morgan was up to something on the day of Sonny’s shooting. That he was unavailable. I had a source get me Elizabeth’s records—”

Mac slammed the drawer shut, grim now. “I’m not listening to anything the WSB got from GH illegally, Anna, I’ve told you that.”

“But Elizabeth really did suffer a nearly fatal consequence that morning,” Anna insisted. “And yet she’s discharged the same day? You must know that doesn’t add up—”

“No, of course not.” Mac dropped a file on his desk. “But it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure it out. Jason was moving everyone into the Towers, and he’s got the connections to get pretty much anything he needs to handle Elizabeth’s care. Audrey Hardy moved in, Anna. Do you really think Audrey of all people would be involved with anything that would put her family at risk?”

“No, I must admit Audrey’s blessing has stumped me,” Anna said. She made a face, considering her thoughts. “I’ve told you that Karpov is in pharmaceuticals — he gets contracts with hospital in port cities to facilitate his smuggling. We had no notion he was in Port Charles until the DEA seized his cargo ship. You weren’t suspicious when that happened on the heels of all these shootings?”

Mac dragged a hand down his face. “No, because I’m an idiot, Anna, who can’t tie his own shoelaces.”

“I didn’t—”

“Anyone with two brain cells can see what happened. Karpov goes after Sonny, gets Kate instead. Sonny blames Johnny Zacchara immediately, which we know since Sonny got arrested that day going after the kid at the hospital. Jason leaves Sonny in lock up overnight so he’ll cool down and so Jason can concentrate on an unrelated accident that put Elizabeth in surgery—”

“Are you sure it’s unrelated?”

“Yes,” Mac retorted. “Elizabeth’s ex took off the same day, dumping her two kids on Audrey. Jason moved everyone into the Towers, Elizabeth had her complication, and as soon as she could travel she was discharged from GH. And I’m willing to bet that there’s an AMA form in her file, isn’t there?”

Anna pressed her lips together. “Yes,” she said tightly. “She was discharged against medical advice. But surely that was to cover Patrick and the hospital for liability. I’m telling you, Mac, something is terribly wrong at GH. Elizabeth’s complication does not make sense! Internal bleeding so many days after her accident? She would have bled out. And the toxicology—”

Mac held up a hand. “I don’t want to hear about one more thing you got illegally from the hospital, Anna. You get to color outside the lines, I don’t. Scott tanked that case against Johnny, made everything worse for Maxie, for Lulu and he did that because he blackmailed Floyd into naming him special prosecutor on his own son’s murder. I told you I’d work with you, I’d share information that was legally obtained, but I’m not interested in anything else.”

“Mac—”

“You bring me real evidence that something is going on at the hospital, something illegal, then fine. We can deal with that. But right now, Patrick Drake isn’t just a doctor at the hospital, he’s not just chief of staff. He’s your future son-in-law. Robin is happy, Anna. She thinks you’re here for her.”

Anna scowled. “I am.”

“Then be here for her. Stop digging into her friends, into her family. Robin’s pregnant, not stupid. She’ll figure it out eventually.”

“You act as if I’m undercover with my own daughter. I’ve missed so much time with her, Mac. Is it so wrong that I’ve wanted to learn more about her and the people who matter?” Anna demanded. “It’s just that she’s told me things that concern me. My grandchild will be born in that hospital, Mac. Have you given any consideration to that? If something is wrong—”

“If you’re right, then it sounds like Patrick is aware of it and will take precautions,” Mac said dryly, and Anna glared at him. “You’ve always been good at manipulating people into feeling guilty, Anna. Glad to see you haven’t lost your touch. Now, if you don’t mind, I have real cases to investigate.”

Crimson Offices: Lobby

 Maxie deliberately turned her back on Lulu’s empty desk, forcing a smile on her face when Spinelli stepped off the elevator, his expression hesitant. “You came. Good. I thought maybe you were still mad at me.”

“The Jackal always heeds a summons from Maximista,” Spinelli said, but the words didn’t sound as natural as they used to. Almost rehearsed. Rote.

“I, um, I’m going to do something I never do, okay? So you need to stand there and let me say it, and then we’ll never think of it again.”

Spinelli frowned, and reached up to draw off his beanie cap, holding it in both hands. “Okay, but—”

“I’m sorry. About that scene at your place yesterday. About what I said to Elizabeth. And about Nadine.” Maxie folded her arms. “I, um, I shouldn’t be saying things like that where you live. Jason’s your family, and he picked her, even though I don’t understand it. It’s just—” She stopped, scratched her temple. “I don’t want to keep blaming something else I don’t want to be that girl who uses her dead sister, dead boyfriends, and parental neglect as an excuse. I just—” She looked at him. “I’m sorry. You’ve been too good to me to deserve me putting you in the middle of people you live with. Jason’s your family,” she repeated. “And Elizabeth is part of that package.”

Spinelli squinted, then shook his head slowly. “We can agree not to speak of it again, but it will not change things. You’re not welcome at the penthouse.”

Maxie pressed her lips together, fighting the urge to scream. “Of course she probably couldn’t wait to forbid it—”

“The Fair Elizabeth made the point that it’s her home. But it’s also Little Dude’s abode. And Stone Cold Junior. She’s never been anything but kind to me. And I also—” He stopped. “Forget it. We’ll just leave it where it is—”

“No. No, we’re being honest here. Finish it.” She lifted her chin. “I can take it.”

“The Jackal was not present when Maximista and Detective Dingus—I wasn’t here. So I don’t know what happened. But I know that he was married.” Spinelli’s eyes found hers. “And that you knew that. That there was no affair with Stone Cold. Not until she learned of the betrayal.”

Maxie’s lips trembled. “So you think she’s right. I’m a homewrecking slut—”

“The Jackal would appreciate if Maximista did not put words in his mouth,” Spinelli said. “The characterization is beyond my power to grant. But there are facts, yes? Timelines? You know them now. Even if you didn’t know them then. And perhaps I can’t say for sure, but I suspect the Fair Elizabeth did little to deserve the way you treated her—beyond being married to the man you wanted.”

Maxie closed her eyes. “Spinelli—”

“I know you’re ashamed of the things you did then. You’ve told me so, and I believe you,” Spinelli told her. “I know that it’s easier for you to lash out, to put your anger somewhere so that you can ignore how hurt you are. I know that,” he repeated. “And I can look past it. I can take the time and see who you are underneath. But it’s not a requirement that everyone does the same. So until Fair Elizabeth says differently, you won’t be welcomed back.”

“Fine. Fine. I don’t even want to go there anyway,” she muttered. She sniffed, then went back to her desk. “Well, thank you for coming by. Glad we could get that sorted.”

She wanted him to argue, to apologize for not leaping to her defense, but instead she heard the squeak of his shoes as he headed for the elevators.

He’d left without another word.

Maxie sat at the desk, staring blindly at the photo of herself and Georgie, the last photograph they’d ever taken together the night of the Black & White Ball, then put her head down and wept.

Elm Street Pier

Claudia rolled her eyes and sat next to her brother on the bench. “I don’t know why we couldn’t have met in a more civilized place. What, does little Mary Sunshine not let you have any guests?”

Johnny shook his head. “It’s nothing personal, Claudia. I just—” Didn’t want a single member of his family inside of Nadine’s home. Not when things were going so well. Nadine had left for work after their morning together, and he wasn’t going to tempt fate. He wanted to keep Nadine away from his family. “Maybe next time. But this isn’t a social call. You made that clear on the phone.”

“It’s not exactly business either—all right, fine. Our esteemed father has sent me on a mission to check on you, though I think we both know he doesn’t handle it well when you’re not in his sight. Especially these days.” Claudia looked out over the blue-gray waters of the lake. “I know Daddy hasn’t exactly been the picture of perfect mental health over the years, but we had a good stretch there, didn’t we? You went to college, I was living in Italy. And Trevor wasn’t sitting on the sidelines, licking his chops to get his hands on the power.”

“Yeah. I know. What changed?” Johnny asked. “All I know is I came home from grad school two years ago and he’d just—” He shook his head. “The stroke, you think?”

“Yeah. Maybe. I kept thinking he’d bounce back, you know. Get himself together. But he was always paranoid. Always waiting for someone to go after him. And Trevor fed on that,” Claudia murmured. “I should have come home. Been with him. I was never his favorite, but I could have done more.”

“I tried to get away from him. Disappeared. He went over the edge last year, Claudie, and I don’t think we’re getting him back. Not all the way.”

“Probably not.” Claudia hesitated. “We’d be better off if you ditched the nurse and came home to Crimson Pointe. No one’s investigating this shooting, John. It’s cold. Dead. Not saying you need to file papers, but if you could just come back to the estate, Daddy could relax. And maybe if you were, I don’t know, we could figure out how to get rid of Trev. We could—”

“Live happily ever after? That ship sailed, and you know that. And besides, I’m okay up here—”

“Really?” Claudia asked dubiously. “Up here? In the sticks? What do you even do all day?”

Johnny rolled his eyes. “You wouldn’t understand—”

“Ha! I knew it! You’re bored to tears—”

“That’s not what I said, and don’t put words in my mouth. At least here, I’m not looking over my shoulder. Not anymore. I didn’t—” Johnny pressed his lips together. “I didn’t plan it this way, but Jason’s in charge now. And he knows I want out.”

“He knows what happened, doesn’t he? He’s protecting you.”

Johnny tipped his head slightly to confirm it, and Claudia exhaled on a long sigh, looking back towards Spoon Island. “That’s interesting,” she murmured. “He must really want peace. He’s got a nurse of his own, doesn’t he?”

“Claudia—”

“Oh, chill. I’m not looking for intel. Just trying to understand the lay of the land.” She bit her lip. “But he does. The nurse and those kids of hers. That’s why he let you live. He wants them to be safe. Let me tell Dad. If he knew Jason was protecting you—”

“I don’t know if Dad had anything to do with what happened to Kate, so the last thing I want is to tell him anything about Jason. This is separate. A deal I made just with him to keep Nadine safe. You know what Dad would do if he thought there was a real witness against me.”

Claudia wrinkled her nose. “Why do you think we’re involved with that stick’s shooting—”

“I didn’t say you were, I said Dad. I don’t know if you’d go anywhere near all of that,” Johnny said. “After…last spring.” Which was the closest he’d ever come to mentioning Michael Corinthos’s tragic shooting.

She looked away, vaguely uncomfortable with the turn in the conversation. “But you think Dad might.”

“I think Dad likes chaos, and Trevor wouldn’t stop him. If he even knew.”

“Dad shooting Kate Howard just to see what happens.” He could see his sister testing that out in her head, and then she nodded. “Yeah, I buy that. I’ll keep my ears open, but you need to come down once and while to keep Dad happy. Bring the nurse. She amuses him.”

“Yeah, fine. I have to get going. I’ll call you.”

Claudia watched her brother leave, waited until he’d climbed the stairs and had disappeared around the corner. Then she turned around—only to see Jerry Jacks sauntering down a second pair of stairs.

He paused at the bottom, then strolled towards her. “Well, that was quite an interesting conversation—”

“Don’t even bother. I’ve tried to eavesdrop from that exact same spot,” Claudia interrupted. “You can’t hear a damn thing over the water. So instead of pretending to guess what we were talking about, just tell me what you want.”

“Fair enough. I didn’t hear the details, but I imagine you were discussing your brother’s hasty marriage. It doesn’t take a genius to realize he married a witness.” Jerry cocked his head. “Nadine Crowell. She’s that chippy little blonde who made the scene at the trial, wasn’t she? Quite amusing, her dedication to the truth. When I heard she’d married Johnny Zacchara, I thought—” He tapped his chin. “I thought, well, why would a girl like that marry a man who shot someone else in the head? Because she believes in the boy, of course. Self-defense, likely.”

Claudia stifled a yawn. “Are you going to get to the point?”

“How protective would she be of your brother if she knew what kind of family he was in? What kind of secrets he kept?” Jerry leaned in. “I have it on good authority that our nurse counted tragic little Michael Corinthos among her patients. Do you think she’d protect your brother if she even suspected he was protecting that boy’s killer?”

Claudia went very still. “Michael isn’t dead.”

“Do you think the nurse will care?” Jerry just smiled. “I wonder how quickly she’d run to the PCPD to turn him in. Or you.”

Claudia wasn’t pretending to be bored anymore. “What do you want?”

Coffee House: Jason’s Office

Jason reluctantly scrawled his name on the bottom of the page, then slid it over to Diane. “Carly and I haven’t made any decisions about Greystone.”

Diane filed the papers in her briefcase. “You could always move your brood there—it’s merely a suggestion, Jason, you needn’t get that look on your face,” she added with a sniff.

“We’re happy where we are. The Towers have what we need for security in an emergency, and the house is in a good neighborhood. Elizabeth likes the schools—”

“It’s ultimately up to you, of course,” Diane said with a shrug. “You could rent out Greystone, leave it in trust for Morgan and Kristina and let them discuss. That property will only become more valuable.”

“Like I said,” Jason said, getting to his feet. “We haven’t made any decisions.”

The door opened then, and Cody stepped in. “Spinelli’s here if you’re done with Miss Miller. And I’m gonna head over to the warehouse if you need anything.”

“Yeah, sure.” Jason looked at Diane. “Anything else?”

“Nothing you’re interested in.” Diane reached for her jacket. “Always a pleasure. Spinelli,” she greeted with a nod, passing the tech.

“The Jackal hates to interrupt—” Spinelli made a face, fiddled with the strap of the laptop bag laying across his chest. “About the argument yesterday with Fair Elizabeth and Maximista—”

“If you’re coming to plead Maxie’s case, Spinelli, it’s not happening.” Jason crossed the office, picked up his jacket, then turned to face the tech. “Look, the penthouse is your home, too, and Elizabeth didn’t say a word when Maxie came to her party. I don’t know exactly what happened, but—”

“Maximista is unhappy about the Sceptic Son and Noble Nurse Nadine,” Spinelli said in a rush. “She sees it as a betrayal of…” His throat worked hard, and he looked away. “She was venting her displeasure, and the Fair Elizabeth…she took exception. As she should. The Jackal is most uncomfortable by all of it. But—”

“You weren’t around when Elizabeth and Lucky’s marriage fell apart the first time,” Jason said slowly. “You don’t know what happened or how Maxie or everyone around Elizabeth treated her as if it was her fault. The drugs, the affair — they blamed Elizabeth.”

Spinelli pressed his lips together. “I can only imagine how painful that must have been for her,” he said, and Jason frowned. It was uncharacteristic of Spinelli to speak so directly and plainly. “And I’m not here to ask that the ban be lifted. On the contrary — I agree that it would be for the best if Maximista limited her exposure to the Fair Elizabeth. She…she is not handling the Blonde One’s fate very well. The Jackal worries.”

Jason exhaled slowly, then nodded. “I’m sorry Maxie is struggling with what happened to Lulu. It’s not easy for anyone, and I can see how Johnny and Nadine’s marriage would have made that more difficult. I’m glad we’re on the same page. After Elizabeth and I move the boys to the house, you’re welcome to stay in the penthouse and Maxie will have free reign again.”

Spinelli smiled slightly. “The Jackal will miss Little Dude and the Sequel when they go. They have superior taste in cartoons.”

Patrick’s Condo: Living Room

Patrick sifted through another set of minutes from the most recent board meeting, clenching his jaw when he reviewed notes on another budget request for upgrading equipment — denied. Just like the request to budget for more nurses—

He was drowning—the hospital was drowning—and if he didn’t get an infusion of cash soon, he’d find it difficult to recruit another crop of medical students—

“Uh, Patrick?”

“What?” he asked, almost absently, scribbling in the margins of the denial. “Is it time for lunch?”

“No. But it’s time for something else.”

He frowned, looked over to see Robin by the door, the handle of a duffel bag looped over her wrist. Patrick lunged to his feet. “It’s time?”

“It’s time.” She smiled tremulously. “Contractions are—” She winced. “Lasting one minute each, five minutes apart. And I just hit two hours.”

“What the hell? Why didn’t you tell me?” he demanded, yanking the bag from her hand and snatching his keys from the table.

“Because you’re insane, so it was easier to wait.” She grimaced, reached for his hand. “But now we’re going to have a baby, so yell at me later.”

And now here I stand with these blood soaked hands
On this sleepless night, that never ends
And these songs I sing
With these hopes that I cling to
Desperately wondering
Are we finally getting to something new?
– Something New, Airborne Toxic Event

---

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Maxie yelped, then jumped back. “What the hell was that?”

Spinelli, not paying all that much attention to her, just grunted from his position on the sofa, hunched over his laptop. “What was what?”

Maxie leaned down, snatched something from the ground. “This!”

He glanced over, then squinted. “One of the Little Dude’s army guys. Gotta watch where you walk, Maximista. Little bit of a minefield these days—”

“Ugh—” Maxie dropped the plastic figurine onto the coffee table. “Didn’t we spend, like, half a day putting together a perfectly good bedroom and play area for those little urchins? Why do they have to infest the entire penthouse?”

Spinelli winced. “You can’t be talking that way,” he said, glancing over his shoulder towards the doorway almost as if he expected Elizabeth or her grandmother to burst in. Fortunately for Maxie, they’d taken Jake to the park for a few hours, otherwise he never would have let Maxie upstairs.

“I can do whatever I want especially since Elizabeth literally chased Lucky and Sam right out of the entire state. Not that I care about Lucky, but you know, he never even gets to see his sons—” She shook her head. “Never mind. Whatever. That’s not why I came over. Has that slutty nurse said anything to you?”

He closed his laptop, tucked it under his arm as he stood. “The Jackal requires another liter of orange soda.”

“Don’t change the subject. I wanna know what Nadine’s said about Saturday. I’m sure she’s trying to turn you against me and I—”

“She doesn’t talk about you at all—”

“Bullshit. That asshole humiliated me—”

Spinelli opened his mouth, but then shook his head. “The Jackal would very much like to change the subject—”

“Why? Don’t you get that she seduced Johnny right out from under Lulu’s nose, and she turned him against me—we were friends, okay? United front, and now we hate each other—”

“That is not what happened—”

“She saw her chance to get Johnny, and she went after him. She didn’t even wait for Lulu to be adjusted to the time change—there’s a word for women who go after other girl’s men, and it’s—”

“Maxie Jones?”

Maxie whirled around, her eyes almost comically wide when she saw Elizabeth standing in the partially open doorway. Spinelli grimaced — they’d been so loud he hadn’t heard the key in the lock. “Excuse me?” Maxie demanded, whirling around.

Elizabeth closed the door, tossed her keys on the desk. “You heard me, Maxie. If you’re going to stand in my home and talk about homewrecking sluts, let’s start with you—”

“Oh, you’ve got a lot of nerve!” Maxie retorted. “This was Sam’s home first!”

Elizabeth arched a brow. “If you’re going to throw insults, try not to sound pathetic. Sam’s been gone from here a long time. But Lucky? He was still my husband when you stole pills for him, don’t you remember?”

“I—” Maxie pressed her lips together. “You were sleeping with Patrick—”

“You know that’s not true. You’ve been told repeatedly that’s not true by everyone involved, including Lucky. But you need it to be, don’t you?” Elizabeth sauntered towards her, smirking. “Because that’s how you justify sleeping with my husband—”

“Are you going to let her talk to me this way?” Maxie said, turning to Spinelli. “You’re supposed to be on my side!”

“The Jackal would very much like to be excluded from this narrative,” Spinelli said.

Maxie narrowed her eyes. “Coward,” she hissed, then focused back on Elizabeth. “I’m sorry, but which one of us had to have a paternity test? Because that was you—”

“Which one of us faked a pregnancy and a miscarriage to keep a man interested?” Elizabeth interrupted, and Maxie’s face went white. “Yeah, you think you’re all grown up and mature with your big important job, but you haven’t learned a damn thing from getting in the middle of adult business, have you?”

“You never deserved Lucky! He loved you!”

“You’re right, Maxie. I never deserved Lucky. You did.” Elizabeth picked up Maxie’s purse, went to the door, and tossed it into the hall. “Why don’t you go find your next victim?”

“How dare you—”

“You’re getting out and you’re not coming back as long as I live here. Now. Or I’ll call security.”

“Spinelli—” Maxie saw Spinelli’s eyes on the floor, and her cheeks heated. “Fine. Fine. I’m leaving.”

She lifted her chin and stalked out, her indignant exit ruined when she had to stoop to retrieve her clutch and the items that had spilled out of it. Elizabeth slammed the door.

“I’m sorry, Fair Elizabeth,” Spinelli said. “I did not think you’d be back so soon. I wouldn’t—”

“You can have whatever relationship with Maxie you want, Spinelli. But she’s not welcome here as long as my kids are living here. I understand that this is your home—”

“No, it’s good. The Jackal, uh, doesn’t enjoy having to defend the Noble Nurse Nadine all the time. I can’t tell her what happened, but I know it’s not what Maxie thinks. And she’s too mad to think clearly about any of it.” He cleared his throat. “But she won’t darken the door again.”

“Good. And Maxie should just count herself lucky that I left Jake with my grandmother and Bobbie for a few hours. I don’t want my boys around her.”

“Understood.”

General Hospital: Nurse’s Station

Nadine stepped behind the counter, sighing as she flipped through a copy of the new schedule. “Is there any chance we’ll ever be fully staffed again?”

“Not under this board,” Epiphany muttered. She glanced over at her. “Why? You got a complaint?”

“No. No. I just…I wish I’d stayed in peds, but I heard those nurses are floating now, too.” She folded the schedule and put it behind the counter. “Is anyone actually getting to stay where they’re trained?”

“We’d need to hire at least twenty more bodies, and unless there’s a miracle, that’s not gonna happen. You’re floating on the general wards this shift. Where else?”

“ICU tomorrow, then down to the ER, and then finishing it off in post-op.” Nadine wrinkled her nose. “Just wish there was more consistency.”

“There should be—” Epiphany held out her hand for Nadine’s schedule. “You’re only supposed to be in one department every rotation. I’ll talk to your charge nurse—”

“No, no, don’t do that. I don’t want to cause any trouble—” Nadine bit her lip as Leyla passed by her, then whispered something to Regina Thompson, another nurse. “Not any more trouble anyway.”

Epiphany’s eyes followed the nurses, then she focused on Nadine. “You still getting the cold shoulder because of the, uh, marriage?”

“I guess Lulu Spencer had more friends in the hospital than I thought.” Nadine picked up a pen, started to flip through a chart. “Leyla thinks I’m the worst person alive and is telling anyone she can find—”

“As if Leyla Mir didn’t snatch up Patrick Drake the second he was available,” Epiphany muttered. Nadine widened her eyes — it was very uncharacteristic of Epiphany to even admit she knew about any gossip, much less repeat it. “Don’t look at me like that, I don’t like mean girls. And that one? No other word.”

“Well, I guess from her perspective—”

“Does her perspective matter so much?” Epiphany asked. “Did you have a good reason for marrying Johnny Zacchara?”

Did she? It had felt that way at the time, but now a month later, Nadine wasn’t sure of anything. “I thought so.”

Epiphany waited another beat, but Nadine said nothing. “I don’t know what you were thinking, only you do. Live your life, make your mistakes, and remember that you don’t answer to anyone but yourself at the end of the day. As long as you can look at yourself in the mirror, you got nothing else to worry about.”

The nurse left the hub, and Nadine watched her go, then sighed. She didn’t know if she could do that either.

Eli’s: Restaurant

 Johnny tapped his fingers on the counter, watching the line cooks behind the counter pulling another rack of meat from the smoker in the back. His attention was pulled when Maxie strode through the entrance, her head down, her fingers flying across the keys of a phone.

Damn. Why was he always running into her in restaurants? Kelly’s was bad enough, Johnny didn’t want to think about what damage Maxie could do in a barbecue joint.

Her head rose up and their eyes met. She narrowed hers. “You really got some nerve, don’t you? What, are you stalking me?”

“I was here first—but—” Johnny accepted the brown bag the employee handed him, then shook it lightly in her face. “I’m leaving, so don’t throw any chicken wings at me.” At least Nadine wasn’t here, he thought, striding past the acerbic blonde and out the door, at first congratulating himself on avoiding confrontation.

Then he winced, remembering the pain on her face, the way she’d talked about the humiliation, begging him to give a damn about what mattered to her. He turned back towards the front door.

“What, did you find someone else to marry on your way to the car? Need a witness?” Maxie asked nastily, shoving the phone into her purse, turning away from the front counter. “I hope you got a prenup because that gold digger—”

“This has to stop—”

“What? You don’t like hearing the truth about your precious goody two shoes? She’s got all you snowed,” Maxie muttered. She snatched her order out of the employee’s hand, tossed down the twenty and walked past him.

Johnny grimaced, then reluctantly decided to follow her. It was time to settle this, once and for all.

Morgan Penthouse: Kitchen

“Where nuggets?” Jake demanded when his mother set his dinner down — a hamburger cut into smaller bites along with mac and cheese as a side. He frowned. “Nuggets.”

“Hamburger,” Elizabeth said. “Nuggets tomorrow.” She sat next to him, ready to cover his dinner plate with her hand the moment he attempted to launch any piece of it. She looked across the table at her grandmother, fixing her own hamburger. “I wish you’d consider staying a few more days, Gram.”

“Oh, we’re bursting at the seams here,” Audrey said, steadying Cameron reaching for his sippy cup filled with juice. “I’ve done my job, and you’ve recovered quite nicely if I say so myself,” she said.

“You’re welcome to stay as long as you want,” Jason told her, and she smiled at him—something Elizabeth never could have imagined only a few weeks ago, but her grandmother and Jason had clearly developed a new respect for one another. “It’s no trouble—”

“I’ve loved spending extra time with my babies…” Audrey smoothed Cameron’s curls back and he grinned at her. “They grow up so fast, and before you know it—” She looked over at Spinelli who was cleaning up orange soda that had sloshed out of his glass. “Well, before you know it, they’re off having their own adventures. But I do miss my quiet house. And you and Jason should have some time on your own without your grandmother hanging around.”

Elizabeth sighed. “I guess it’s selfish to ask you to keep giving up your life. I just…I’ve been a little spoiled with all the people I love under one roof.”

“And I’ve enjoyed every minute of it. It’s been a blessing, but you’re going to be back at work, and Jake will have a wonderful time spending the day with his father. I think it’s time we all got back to, well, what passes for normal in Port Charles. As long as we can. But I’m just a phone call away if you need me.”

Eli’s: Parking Lot

“Stay away from me, or you’ll get the pepper spray,” Maxie threatened, digging through the purse looped over the arm holding the paper bag.

“Relax, pain in the ass, I just want to talk. This has to stop,” Johnny repeated. “You get to be angry at me, but the digs at Nadine have to stop—”

“Really? Really? I have to stop being angry at the woman who pretended to give a damn about Lulu just to get close to you?” Maxie raged. “I bet she couldn’t wait to tell you every day! Reading magazines to her, washing her face—” She stopped, her voice choked. She pressed a fist to her mouth, turned away.

Johnny cleared his throat. “I—she never told me—I didn’t know that.”

“What? Don’t be stupid! Why would she do all of that if—” Maxie looked at him, her voice shaking. “She dropped Nikolas like a hot potato when he wouldn’t take her to California, but she knew you were lonely—”

“Maxie. Come on. Come on. You’re smarter than that.” Johnny took a step closer to her, and she closed her eyes. “I know you’ve heard the rumors. Mac’s your stepfather.”

Maxie’s lips trembled, so she bit down on them, folding her arms, the paper bag crinkling. “So? That doesn’t explain why she was with you on the pier or why she agreed to protect you. She barely knows you. She wanted your money, and saw her chance, so she made sure to impress you by taking care of Lulu—”

“She never told me a single word of that, Maxie. Never. And look, get mad at me, okay?” He pressed a hand to his chest. “I’m the one who put Lu in that situation, brought her to that wedding. Waited too long to get her help. I did all of it wrong. But Nadine did nothing but be a good person. At every step. You’re telling me she sat with Lulu, took time so Lu wasn’t alone. She also found time to sit with you, didn’t she? And do you know what she was doing with me that day?”

“I bet I do—”

“Defending me to Nikolas, angry that I was being cut out of Lulu’s treatment. Helping me think about what to say to Elizabeth Webber so that she’d talk to Nikolas for me. She’s protecting me, Maxie, because she thought it was the right thing to do. She’s a good person who doesn’t deserve the shit you’re giving her. Whatever they’re saying in the hospital, you don’t know her. None of you do. You’d never say any of this if you did.”

Maxie looked away, tears staining her cheeks. “It’s not fair. None of this is—if Lu were here, none of this would be happening, and maybe I hate her because she’s not here. And you know, this is my fault, okay.  Lulu was just trying to save me, and now she’s gone, and Spinelli hates me, too, for all of this, and Elizabeth that bitch kicked me out of the penthouse, and it’s just not fair!”

The words came out as a rushing tumble, so rapidly that Johnny couldn’t follow most of it. “Maxie—”

“Don’t. Don’t. I’m already humiliated enough.” She closed her eyes, took a deep breath. “Fine. Fine. You want peace, you’ve got it. We’ll just ignore each other. And when Lulu comes home, I’ll help her kick your ass.”

“I look forward to that. I mean it, Maxie. Thank you.”

Morgan Penthouse: Master Bedroom

Elizabeth switched off the bathroom light, made a face. “I feel guilty.”

Jason picked up the white baby monitor on the nightstand, checked the volume. “For what? Leaving your grandmother with the boys while we took the bike out again? She didn’t seem to mind.”

“No, not about that.” She shook her head. “Did Spinelli say anything about today?”

“No.” Jason frowned, sat on the edge of the bed. “What happened?”

Elizabeth sat next to him, wrinkled her nose. “Gram and I went out for a little while with Jake, and then I came back early. Maxie was here.”

“I’m sorry. I should have told him—”

“I know they’re friends. I don’t understand why—she was always so terrible to him, but I guess after Georgie—” Elizabeth sighed. “I was going to be okay with that, you know. I really was. But I walked in on her raging about Nadine, insulting her—saying all the things I know she’s said about me—I lost it on her. I kicked her out, and I told Spinelli she can’t come back.”

“Spinelli knows Maxie’s an acquired taste,” Jason said. He covered her knee, his thumb stroking the skin left bare by the long sleep shirt she wore. “And this is your home. I want you to feel comfortable here—”

“But it was Spinelli’s first,” Elizabeth said. “And I don’t want him to feel like he can’t have the people he cares about—”

“It’s just temporary, right?” Jason reminded her. “You want us to move back to your place. I figure Spinelli will stay here, and he can have Maxie over whenever he wants.”

“But—”

“What happened to Georgie, he took it hard. He was the one to find her. Being there for Maxie, it helped him deal with all of that.”

“Which is why I should suck it up and—” She bit her lip. “It’s not about Lucky. It’s not that she had an affair with my husband. I don’t even care about that anymore. I really don’t—” she repeated when he just looked at her. “I—”

“You were faithful to Lucky until that night here in the penthouse,” Jason reminded her, and she sighed. “Worried about him, thinking about him. And he was having an affair with Maxie, telling her that you’d cheated first. A rumor she had no problem spreading far and wide. And then when you were sacrificing your time with Cameron to help Lucky, he continued to sleep with her, and she kept giving him pills. Not being in love with him anymore doesn’t change what happened. Or Maxie’s role in it.”

“No, I know that.” She rested her chin on his shoulder. “I just don’t like her very much and knowing that she’s taking that same terrible attitude and turning it on Nadine — it made me so angry.”

Jason kissed her forehead. “It’s okay. If Spinelli has a problem with it, I’ll handle it.”

She sighed. “Okay.”

“Are we done talking about Maxie now? Forever? Because that would be great.” Jason drew her palm to his lips.

“Oh, most definitely,” Elizabeth promised. She crawled into his lap, straddling him, and cupping his face with her hands. “I can think of much better things to talk about.”

If someone said three years from now
You’d be long gone
I’d stand up and punch them out
‘Cause they’re all wrong and
That last kiss, I’ll cherish until we meet again
And time makes it harder, I wish I could remember
But I keep your memory, you visit me in my sleep
My darling, who knew?
– Who Knew, P!nk

---

Monday, November 3, 2008

Morgan Penthouse: Master Bathroom

 Elizabeth swirled the toothbrush beneath the faucet, dropping it back into the container just as Jason pushed the shower door open and stepped out, grabbing a white towel to wrap around his waist. She turned around, leaned against the counter, arched a brow. “You know, I could put off my meeting with Epiphany another day.”

He paused in the act of dragging another, smaller towel through his hair, confused for a moment, then grinned. “You could. But your grandmother is still here.”

She wrinkled her nose. “And if I ask her to take Cameron to school, she’ll just have questions. No, fair point.” She turned back to the sink, reached for the mouthwash and he came up next to her, retrieving his own toothbrush. “I like this part.”

Their eyes met in the mirror, and she went on, “And I hope I never take it for granted. That I get to stand here with you in the morning, at night. That we have this.”

“You won’t—I won’t,” he promised her.

She finished her mouthwash, left him in the bathroom so that she could shed her robe and pull out some clothes. As much as she’d enjoyed the last few weeks, recuperating at home with her boys, having her family around, it was time to get back to normal.

Or whatever normal would look like now that her life included Jason.

“We haven’t talked about the boys with you going back on rotation,” Jason said, emerging from the bathroom. “I know you had Jake in daycare, but—”

“But that’s not possible now,” she said, and he nodded. “I figured. I don’t want to hire a nanny just for my hours—”

“I know. That’s why I thought—I can work from here. It’s different now,” he continued. “I’m…I’m the one—”

“You’re the one sending people out to do your old job,” Elizabeth finished, and he nodded. “Okay.”

“You’re okay with that?”

“Yeah. Of course.” She smiled. “I want you to have time with Jake, and you wouldn’t take him anywhere that wasn’t safe.” She stroked his arm. “We can do this, Jason. As long as we talk to each other.”

“I love you.” He leaned down, kissed her. “I need to get Cameron to school.”

She didn’t bother to tell him that he didn’t need to keep doing that either. Elizabeth thought Jason liked doing those small domestic duties, all the little bits and pieces that came with being a father. She’d deprived him of so much time, so many opportunities. But that was over now.

It was time for everything that came next.

Nadine’s Apartment: Kitchen

He’d slept on the sofa the last two nights.

It really shouldn’t have bothered him, Johnny thought, switching on the coffee pot, listening to the hiss and pop of percolating caffeine. He was supposed to be on the sofa. That had always been the plan. Go to Vegas, get married to protect them both, come back to Port Charles, and figure out how to handle everything else — but sleeping on the sofa was understood.

He’d changed it all — he’d reached for Nadine that first morning in Vegas because he’d wanted to, and because she’d looked so skeptical that anyone would believe he wanted her—and he’d kept reaching for her, even when she’d expressed doubts about the way they were complicating everything.

Until Saturday. Until he’d fought with Maxie again. Until Nadine had looked at him and reminded him point blank that this was temporary. That they were only in this mess because Lulu had lost herself, had been whisked away to California where he couldn’t even see her. That Maxie was furious that Johnny had married someone else only days later.

And he hadn’t been able to charm Nadine out of her anger, hadn’t been able to smile and flirt his way back to safety, so he’d turned on her, throwing her kindness back in her face—

He cringed now, thinking about it.

“You came to town because of what your sister did, you told me that. To put some good back into the world. How’s that working for you? You saved Nikolas’s life, and he walked out. You tried to help me, and look how that turned out—”

What an asshole. All she’d done since that night in the hospital was look after him, to do what was best for him. She’d done whatever she could to keep the PCPD and Scott Baldwin from dragging him to court again—even though this time he was actually guilty.

And that sat uncomfortably—the knowledge that Johnny was responsible for putting Sonny Corinthos in a coma. Maybe it had been self-defense, but it didn’t change what he’d done.

All Nadine had asked him to do was avoid Maxie. Not to engage. Not to be part of the public scenes.

“If you want to fight with Maxie everywhere, then fine. Do whatever makes you happy. What does it matter that all it does is humiliate me? Why should that matter? It didn’t matter to Jolene, didn’t matter to Nikolas. Why would you be any different?”

He leaned against the counter, staring blindly at the linoleum floor. She’d asked him for one thing.

It was time to figure out how to get that for her — even if that meant finding a way to make peace with Maxie. Nadine deserved at least that much, if not more.

General Hospital: Patrick’s Office

Patrick grinned when he saw Elizabeth knock on his open door and came to hug her. “Hey, Epiphany said you were coming in today. We miss you.”

“I miss you guys, too,” Elizabeth said, sitting down. “Epiphany put me back on rotation starting Wednesday, so—” She nodded at his desk stacked with files. “You look busy. I should get out of your hair—”

He touched the top of the files, laying his hand across the manila folder. “No, it’s not—I mean, they’re patient files. I—I’m trying to organize things to take off for a week or two.”

“You’re actually going to take paternity leave? Like not come to work for an entire day?” Elizabeth wrinkled her nose. “Do you know how to do that?”

“I don’t really have any choice,” he said. “Robin can’t—and shouldn’t be alone for this.” He hesitated, looked at the files, then back at her. “You were alone, weren’t you?”

“With Cam? Yeah, sort of. I mean, I had my grandmother, but Lucky was there with Jake.” She looked down at her hands. “He had to do a lot of the work in the beginning—I was recovering from the complications. He…was really good with him.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up—”

“No, it’s okay. It’s—” Elizabeth scratched the edge of her brow, then shifted, uncomfortable. “You know, it’s easy sometimes, I think, to focus on how it ended. On the way he left. He didn’t even tell the boys goodbye. I know it’s partially my fault—”

“Jake, yeah, okay, that’s on you. But not Cam. Don’t let yourself get sucked into blaming yourself because that twerp couldn’t hack being a hands-on father when he didn’t get his way. Cameron was his kid before there ever was a Jake. And there was no call for him to up and leave that boy just because he was pissed at you.”

“I know that, but—”

“But nothing.” Patrick shoved away from the desk, restless. “You don’t get to be a dad when it’s convenient. You know, we’re joking about how hard it’s going to be for me to take some time off, but if I could take more than two weeks, I’d do it. Robin’s doing the hard part. All I gotta do is sit there and wait for someone to give me my kid. But when they give me my daughter, Elizabeth, you better believe I’d kill someone who tried to take her away. I wouldn’t walk away from her, and I haven’t even met her yet. I don’t need to hold her to love her. What kind of—” He broke off, looked away.

“We’re not about Lucky anymore, are we?” Elizabeth asked softly. “Patrick—”

“No. I just—” Patrick pressed his lips together, took a deep breath. “Jason told me Cam was there that morning. That he saw Lucky leave. And I don’t get that. I don’t. I don’t get how you can switch off like that. My father—he was there every day when I was a kid. And I thought he was the world’s best father until he dove into the bottle.” He looked at her. “How does that happen? How does he show up for me but Matt? He’s nothing to my dad. Not even a blip. Just a couple of checks a year, and he doesn’t have to think about anything else. Never held him. Never sat with him. And he lived all this time like Matt didn’t exist. How does that work? How do you love one kid and hate the other?”

“People are human,” Elizabeth said. She rose, crossed to him. “And no parent ever sets out to love one child more than the other. Maybe Noah had guilt later, maybe he didn’t. I don’t know if my parents ever felt badly about the favoritism they showed Steven and Sarah. I don’t know how Lucky could be there for my little boy almost from the beginning, and then walk away. Jake—I know that it would have been hard for Lucky, to watch Jason step in with Jake, but I never had any intention of taking Cam from him. Even now, we’ve told Jake Jason’s his father, but Cam still just calls him Jason. Because he knows who his father is, even though he stopped asking for him.”

“And doesn’t that make you furious? Don’t you want to rip his throat out?”

“It just makes me sad,” she said, and he sighed. “For Cameron, who must be so confused, even though he’s handling it. And for Lucky. His greatest fear, you know, was that he’d end up like his father. That he’d let his family down when it mattered. It’s easier to run, Patrick. To hide. To pretend the problem doesn’t exist. But I can’t let it rule my life. If Lucky comes back, I’ll deal with it. But for now? My boys are safe, they’re healthy, and they’re loved. Your daughter is going to be so loved, she’ll be smothered with it. Our parents teach us so much about family, and who we want to be. They’re the model we’re trying to live up to—or avoid being.”

“Yeah, yeah, I guess that’s true.” He rubbed his face. “I don’t want to be Noah Drake.”

“You won’t be. You couldn’t be. Because you’d never run away when it gets hard. You could have turned down this job. But you come here every day and face it. That’s the kind of dad you’ll be. Someone who shows up and loves so fiercely it takes your breath away.”

Elizabeth touched the patient files, then met his eyes. “You should call Matt. He could take some of these off your hands.”

“I thought you weren’t going to meddle,” he muttered, but there was no heat in his tone.

“I think there’s a window where family gets to be close. A moment where they choose each other. I missed mine with Steven or Sarah, and there’s no guarantee it’ll ever open again. Matt’s a good doctor.” She held the top file out to him. “Give him a chance.”

Coffee House: Office

Carly set her bag on the chair, draped her coat over the back, and then took a deep breath before raising her head to look at Jason. “Mama said she’d talked to you.”

Jason’s mouth tightened and he dropped his gaze to his desk before forcing himself to look back at her. “I was going to call you.” And that was true, he thought, but he hadn’t exactly put it at the top of his list or let himself think about it much. He hadn’t even mentioned it to Elizabeth.

“Well, I’m here, so…” She looked down, plucked at a thread in her coat. “Patrick asked if I wanted some second opinions. You know, how I went all the way around the world trying to find someone, anyone who would tell me he was wrong about Michael. But he wasn’t then. And he’s not now.”

“No, I didn’t think he was.” Jason cleared his throat. “Are you thinking about sending him to Silver Water?”

“Yeah. Yeah, um, I like the idea of him being near Michael. I called, and they said they had a bed open. They’re holding it.” Carly’s fingers dug into the top of the chair. “Have you…I know it’s none of my business, but have you been to see him?”

“No.”

“Right.” She bit her lip. “Morgan’s handling it, but I was thinking maybe I should find someone for him to talk to. Or at least a therapist who can observe him. Make sure I’m not missing anything. It’s been…it’s been a hard year. The boys were close to Emily, too, so that’s…”

Jason exhaled slowly. “I’m sorry. I never meant for you take this on entirely—”

“It’s okay. It is, Jason. You were juggling a thousand things a few weeks ago, and I agreed with you then — your family came first. You couldn’t do anything for Sonny—”

“I could have. Elizabeth was in surgery. Maybe I could have checked in with him or called someone.”

Carly sat down, folded her hands in her lap. “Or Sonny could have learned a lesson from six months ago. He rushed into whatever happened on those docks. You said it was self-defense. Sonny went after Johnny out in the open. He was never like that before we lost Michael. He was out of control, and everything that happened after Kate was shot told us that. Maybe he was having an episode. I don’t know. But what I do know is none of this is your fault. Elizabeth nearly died. Sonny could have waited. He could have been sitting in the waiting room with you, waiting for word. That’s what a friend would have done.” Her voice faltered. “I should have done that.”

“Carly—”

She shook her head. “Don’t make excuses for me. We both know that I have to work twice as hard to be a good person. It doesn’t come naturally for me. It never has. Sometimes I stumble into it, and that’s great, but mostly someone has to point it out. I don’t want to be someone you take care of, Jason.” Carly exhaled in a quick breath. “And I didn’t come here to be a weepy mess. I figured you’d be okay with Silver Water. I’m going to make the arrangements and talk to Kate. She, um, got out of the hospital last week. I figure she should be in the loop since if not for a few minutes and a crazy shooter, this would be her decision.”

“I think that’s a good idea. Let me know if there’s anything you need from me.” Jason got to his feet, intending to walk her out but Carly remained still. “Was there something else?”

“I ask every time I go if you’ve been there.” Her eyes searched his, and he dropped his gaze first.  “Promise me, Jason. You’ll go to see him before we move him.”

“I—” He glanced away, then nodded. “Yeah. I’ll go.”

“Okay. I’ll call you later.”

Crimson Offices: Lobby

 Kate removed her sunglasses, stowed them in her purse and held it out to a beaming Maxie who snatched it, delighted to have Kate back.

“I can’t believe you’re already coming back to work,” Olivia complained following Kate into her office. “You just got out of the hospital—”

“I’ve recovered almost completely, Olivia.” Kate was relieved to see her desk was mostly clear. Maxie bustled in, heading to the cappuccino maker in the corner. It was lovely to be back in her element, to have her assistant who knew exactly how to look after her.

“But—”

“I appreciate you staying, that you came to the wedding at all,” Kate continued. She sat at her desk, holding out her hand to accept the drink Maxie brought her. “But I think we’ve learned that we do much better with some distance between us.”

“Distance,” Olivia repeated. She folded her arms. “You mean me back in Bensonhurst where I can’t remind you of where you came from—”

“I used to be ashamed of it.” Kate tipped her head. “Strange, isn’t it? The thought that someone would learn that I was born in Brooklyn and hadn’t spent my youth summering in Martha’s Vineyard. As if that was all that mattered in the world.” She sighed. “I’m not ashamed of who I was, Olivia, but that’s not who I am anymore. And I’m not sure you’re interested in Kate Howard. You proved that while I was in the hospital. When given the opportunity to put me first, you chose petty revenge.”

“Do you really think that’s why I did it?” Olivia planted a hand at her hip. “Do you really think that I give a damn about what happened twenty years ago?”

“Twenty-five. You’d think that it would be easy for you to remember that, all things considered—”

Olivia’s eyes darted over to Maxie, doing her best to fade into the curtains. She looked back at her cousin. “We don’t need to talk about any of that—”

“What’s the harm in doing it now? What can it possibly matter? Sonny’s not here to get angry at me for keeping the secret, at you for lying—”

Olivia folded her arms. “You think I give a damn about any of that? You promised you wouldn’t say a thing—”

“Back then, it was personal.” Kate’s lips flirted with a smile. She flexed her manicured hands. “I wanted him, so I took him. And I didn’t want him to have any ties to you. We both know what he would have done if you’d told him.”

“I wasn’t tying my life to a thug. You think what’s happened is a tragedy, but whoever put that bullet in you did you a favor, whoever put a bullet in him did a favor for the world—”

Kate’s expression went pale. “Get out. Now. And don’t ever come back.”

“With pleasure,” Olivia spat. She slammed the door behind her, and Kate took a breath, pressed a hand to her midsection, gathering herself.

Then she looked at Maxie who had remained as still as a statue, a notepad in her hands. “Family can be very difficult. Particularly when the history is filled with nothing but bad memories. I apologize for that scene.”

“Nothing to apologize for.” Maxie folded her arms. “Maybe Olivia really believes someone did you a favor, but they’re also why Lulu is gone, and she knows that. She just doesn’t care. So goodbye and good riddance.”

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Elizabeth lifted the lid on a toy box, dropped the bundle she was holding into it, then looked at Jake. “This doesn’t open for at least an hour. Play with the toys that you already have.”

Jake considered the truck at his feet, screwing his tiny face up with thought. “Want fire.”

“Does it have to—”

“Fire,” Jake repeated, stomping his foot.

“Fine, fine. I’ll get the fire engine.” Elizabeth dug down to the bottom, retrieved the fire engine. “How about this one?”

Jake beamed at her. She set it on the floor in front of him. “Okay, go forth and annoy the world.” She winced when she heard the siren wailing as Jake rolled it towards the door. “Should have broken that thing when I had the chance.”

The front door opened, and Jason stepped in, frowning at the sound.

“Sorry, I tried to get him to play with the quiet dump truck—” She picked her way towards him—she’d only cleaned up about half the toys Jake had dragged out all morning. His favorite way to spend the day was emptying his toybox so he could see all his toys at once. “But he likes loud noise. I was hoping he’d inherit your love for quiet—” She raised her voice slightly to be heard over the clamor.

“No, I guess he got your love of chaos.” Jason dipped his head, kissed her. She sighed, leaned against him for a moment, enjoying it. She wouldn’t take her health for granted again, she thought.

“Yeah, well, between Jake liking things that make noise and Cameron’s need for speed, I’m a little scared.” She gestured towards the kitchen. “We can talk in there—the noise isn’t so bad when you’re not in the same room.” He followed her towards the back of the penthouse, and true enough, the fire alarm dulled a bit with the distance. “You sure you want to keep him at home?” she asked, pulling out ingredients for Jake’s usual sandwich lunch.

“I can handle it,” Jason said, but he was smiling when he sat at the table. “Did Epiphany put you back on the schedule?”

“Yeah. I’m hoping to get to the surgical floor. I like the hours better there, but we’re short-staffed in so many places.” She cut Jake’s sandwich in diagonal slices. “I thought you said you’d be at the coffee house until later. Plans change?”

“Yeah.” Jason leaned back in the chair, looked at the surface of the table. “Carly came by. It’s, uh, time to talk about long-term care. For Sonny.”

Elizabeth’s fingers stilled in the process of setting carrot pieces next to Jake’s sandwich. She went to him, and he pulled her down to sit on his knee. “What do you need?” she asked softly, touching his face, stroking his hair back. “What can I do?”

“Nothing. There’s…” He sighed, leaned his head against her chest. She kept combing through his hair. “He’ll go to Silver Water. Like Michael.”

She said nothing, knowing he wasn’t finished. He spoke again, “She wants me to go see him. Before.”

“Because you haven’t until now.” Because he couldn’t, she knew that. Couldn’t face it. Until he sat in the room next to Sonny’s still body, next to a shell of the man who had played such a pivotal role in Jason’s life—part of Jason could pretend it wasn’t happening. “Gram is still here. Let’s take advantage of that. After the boys are in bed, we’ll take the bike. We’ll make it go away for a little while.”

“I don’t know if that’ll work, but—” Jason tipped his face back so that their eyes met. “Yeah. Okay.”

‘Cause I’m not your princess, this ain’t a fairytale
I’m gonna find someone someday
Who might actually treat me well
This is a big world, that was a small town
There in my rear-view mirror disappearing now
And it’s too late for you and your white horse
Now it’s too late for you and your white horse
To catch me now
– White Horse (TV), Taylor Swift

---

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Nadine’s Apartment: Kitchen

The first time she slammed the cabinet door, Johnny barely noticed it. The second time, he glanced over from the sofa, and the third time, he cleared his throat and got to his feet. “Uh, did you want help putting the dishes away?”

Nadine pressed her lips together, said nothing. She closed the dishwasher with the toe of her foot, then a bump of her hip.

“Okay,” Johnny said, drawing the word out uncertainly. “Are you still mad at me?”

“No, why would I be mad at you?” she asked sweetly, picking up the plastic dish with the leftovers from dinner. She yanked the fridge open, dropped the container on the middle shelf, then let the door slam.

“I didn’t throw the food.”

“No, you didn’t.”

“I didn’t start it either,” Johnny said, following Nadine back into the living room. He snagged his jacket from the hook hurriedly when she dragged her sweatshirt over her head. “You’re not going jogging at this time of night — we’re in the middle of a conversation.”

“No, we’re not.” Nadine pulled the door open, but he slapped a hand on it and shut it. She scowled, pulled it open again, and then they wrestled for a minute over the doorknob. “I want to go for a walk, and I don’t want to look at you right now—”

“Okay, so you are mad at me.” Johnny slithered in front of the door, arched his brows. “Why can’t you just say that? I didn’t start the fight. And I paid for everyone’s food, remember? I stayed to clean up!”

Nadine closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and counted to ten. “The last time Maxie saw us together at the hospital, what happened?”

“Hospital security had to escort us both out. In my defense, she kicks—” He rubbed his forearm. “And bites—”

“For the last month, every time Maxie so much as sees us breathing the same air, she loses her mind. I asked you, no, I begged you, just ignore her. Don’t respond. Don’t fight back. Walk away. We could have just—”

“Let her win?” Johnny made a face. “Not a chance. She’s wrong—”

“She’s not!” Nadine retorted. “The only reason any of this is happening is because Lulu isn’t here. Okay? If she were okay, you never would have been on the pier with me, we wouldn’t have gone to Vegas, and we wouldn’t be sleeping together!” She dragged her hands down her face. “Maxie’s not wrong. Even a little bit. Okay? And she knows it.”

“She doesn’t know—”

“Johnny—” There was a sudden pressure behind her eyes, and Nadine had to exhale, to look away. “Sometimes you can be the most infuriating man alive, do you know that?”

Johnny straightened, moved away from the door. “You’re complicating something that doesn’t need to be complicated. Maxie will cool down and we can all just get on with our lives—”

“Yeah? What does that look like, Johnny? What, four or five months, we’ll figure no one will ask any questions, and we’ll just get a divorce? You’ll go back to your crazy family, and I’ll get my half of the closet back?”

Johnny opened his mouth, then closed it. “What does that mean? What are you asking me?”

“Nothing. Nothing. You’re right. This is only as complicated as we want it to be, and you don’t want it to be, do you?”

When he just looked at her, she nodded. “Exactly. So when I ask you to stop poking at Maxie who is justifiably angry about what happened to her friend and how we handled it, maybe next time you’ll listen. Now, get out of my way and let me go for a walk.”

This time, he didn’t stop her.

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

“Look at you, throwing parties. Who would have guessed it?” Bobbie teased, joining Jason by the fireplace as he watched Jake carefully build a tower from the Legos he’d spilled out onto the floor.

Across the room by the desk, Elizabeth had been cornered by her grandmother and Monica, her smile bright and her eyes happy. After a long year—after several long years — of seeing her cry more than smile, it was a relief that only memories of Emily a few days earlier had brought those tears to the surface.

“Audrey handled everything.”

“Well, still, it’s a good thing to get everyone together. Though maybe I should have tied a chicken or something around Carly’s neck so that someone over the age of twenty-five will talk to her,” Bobbie said. Jason searched out Carly who was making very awkward conversation with Spinelli, practically the only adult in the room other than Jason who could stand her. Cameron and Morgan took turns chasing each other, looping around sofas and pool tables.

“I told her she didn’t have to come,” Jason reminded Bobbie, who just sighed.

“I told her that, too, but well, maybe she took it as a dare. She said she’s been trying hard to be good, at least since some incident at the hospital.” Bobbie lifted her brows. “How’s she doing? Is she finally learning to play well with the other kids?”

“Good. She’s been great. With Cam, I mean. And having Morgan around has really made the adjustment easier for him. And Elizabeth hasn’t said anything about her.”  Not that she would, Jason thought. She never did complain to him about Carly, preferring to handle it herself.

“Moving in here or losing Lucky?” Bobbie wanted to know. When Jason just looked down, she sighed. “I wish I could understand what happened to my nephew. He wasn’t always like this. Or, you know, maybe he was,” she murmured, more to herself. “His answer when things were difficult was to run away. Couldn’t deal with his father, okay, but the way he treated Laura—I don’t know. Maybe he was always going to grow up to be Luke.”

Jason sipped his beer, and Bobbie tapped his arm. “You don’t have to answer that. Or say anything. The boys have been good for each other. And I’m so glad they both have you.” She paused. “I don’t—I don’t want to pry or poke into anything, but you should know that Patrick’s talked to Carly about decisions that need to be made for Sonny.”

Jason took a deep breath, looked over to Patrick who had joined Elizabeth by the door. “I—I haven’t asked her.”

“I know. And Carly’s a little prickly on the subject, too. I just thought you should know the topic has been raised.”

Drake Condo: Living Room

Robin rubbed her belly, feeling the reassuring press of a tiny foot against her hand. “You know, if you’d just come out, I could have gone out tonight,” she muttered to her unborn child. “You’re being very stubborn.”

“Are you insulting my grandchild?” Anna asked. Robin turned to find her mother smiling, holding out a cup of herbal tea. “This is a good lesson for you to learn. Children will do as they please. You certainly did.”

“I want to argue with that, but I can’t. Uncle Mac basically threw up his hands after a while.” Robin sipped her tea. “I was doing just fine with all of this, living my life, going where I wanted, but a week ago, it just became impossible.”

Anna just smiled, went over to the sofa, began to organize the pillows, fold the throw blanket Robin had used earlier that day. “Any day now. Or minute. And Patrick is just a phone call away. I’m sure Elizabeth understands — you said she was a mother, didn’t you? She and Jason have how many children?”

“Two,” Robin said absently, then frowned, looked at her mother. “No, one. Well, the younger son is Jason’s biological son. The older is from someone else, I don’t really know anything about him.”

“Wasn’t she married to Lucky Spencer? I thought I remember something about it from my visit last year—” Anna furrowed her brow. “Or was it two years ago?”

“They divorced last year, but they’d been having issues for a while.” Robin began a lap around the room, wincing as the baby shifted, pressing against her ribs. She rubbed her belly again, hoping to get the baby roll another way. “They separated, and Liz and Jason had something. It was a mess for a while, but it seems like it’s sorted out now.”

“I still find it laudable that you’re friendly with your ex-boyfriend. And that you’ve become such close friends with the new woman in his life. Holly and I could never quite achieve that, though I tried to be friendly for your sake.”

Robin snorted. “If that was you being friendly —” Her mother flashed her a quick grin. “I told you before — it’s been ages since Jason and I were together and, well, Liz got close to Patrick first. She was really great when I found out I was pregnant. When I left Port Charles, I was sure Jason would end up with Carly. Thank God he found Liz. And I’m glad he’s a father. He really deserves it.”

Anna lifted his brows. “I’m certainly not one to talk about having a family with a dangerous profession, but is it really a good idea for a man like him to have a family?”

Robin bristled. “A man like him? A wonderful, devoted, loyal, and generous man?”

“A man in the business that he is,” Anna said, unruffled by her daughter’s sharp tone. “Look what happened to that poor boy and Jason’s business partner—”

“Neither of those things were Jason’s fault. And if people listened to him more often, they wouldn’t have—” Robin closed her mouth, her throat suddenly tight. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t even know how we got on this topic, darling.” Anna rubbed her shoulder. “You know your friend best. Drink your tea and we’ll find something to watch until Patrick returns.”

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Elizabeth sidestepped Cameron and Morgan on another lap around the pool table, lifting the tray in her hands high to avoid being knocked down.

“Let me grab that,” Patrick said, reaching for it. “Birthday girl doesn’t work.” She followed him over to the desk which had been cleared off for the birthday cake Bobbie had pulled out of the fridge earlier.

“Moms don’t get days off,” Elizabeth said, already tidying the table, tucking plastic forks and spoons back into the red cup that had tipped over at some point. Patrick slapped playfully at her hands. “Please, just wait until Robin has a kid living outside her body. It’s impossible to turn the radar off.”

“Fair enough—” Patrick paused when the door behind them opened and Maxie came through, her jacket thrown over her arm and a gift bag in her hand. The blonde ignored them both and headed right for Spinelli, tossing the gift haphazardly on the coffee table.

Elizabeth pursed her lips, then deliberately turned back on the blonde. “Carly and Maxie at my birthday party. Who made this list again?”

Patrick smirked, then his smile faded when snatches of Maxie and Spinelli’s conversation drifted over to them. Maxie was animated, her hands flying in the air, and Spinelli had his shoulders hunched. “And she doesn’t look happy to be here.”

“Well, who wants to attend the birthday party of your ex-boyfriend’s ex-wife?” Elizabeth shrugged a shoulder. “I’m sure Spinelli didn’t even think about it. He wasn’t around for that stuff.”

She caught Jason’s eye across the room and saw him also looking at the pair with a little concern. She shook her head, trying to indicate that it was okay, and he nodded, returned his attention to keeping Cameron and Morgan from knocking things over. Carly was with her mother, doing everything she could to avoid Monica Quartermaine, who was glaring at her.

“Happy birthday to me,” Elizabeth murmured, then focused on Patrick again. “Sorry. I really shouldn’t be annoyed. I drove Jason crazy with Lucky and Ric and—well, let’s just say the list doesn’t end there. How is Robin?” she asked, changing the subject. “Driving you crazy?”

“Driving everyone crazy. Thank God her mom showed up to distract her,” Patrick muttered. “Did she tell you that our offer on the house was accepted?”

Elizabeth lit up. “Really? That’s amazing! Oh, I’m so happy. Our kids will grow up near each other, and you’re going to love the neighborhood. Cam’s not in public school yet, but I’ve heard great things.”

“Robin has us on the wait list at St. Andrews already,” Patrick said with a grimace. “The tuition is ridiculous. It’s preschool, and I think it costs as much as Harvard.”

“Oh, I know.” She made a face. “If it weren’t for Cam’s grandfather leaving him a trust fund for education, I’d be over at Happy Wagon or whatever that place is called near the hospital. But thanks to Cameron Lewis, I applied for St. Andrew’s the second I came home from California. Being Steve and Audrey Hardy’s great-grandson was definitely my ticket in. But it’s worth it. Cam adores it, and he’s already learned so much just in two months.”

“Yeah, I guess that’s something I have to start thinking about. Schools and pediatricians. Robin’s probably got lists for that, too. But before we can worry about any of that, we’ve got to have a baby. Kelly says if she still hasn’t delivered in a week, we’re inducing.” He rolled his shoulders. “She wanted to come—”

“But going anywhere right now is awful. I completely understand. Tell her not to worry. You know Kelly has everything under control. There’s no one I’d trust more. You know what I went through with Jake, and Kelly’s the reason I’m still here.”

“Yeah, yeah, it’s just—” Patrick looked down at the bottle of beer in his hand. “After what happened to you, I just can’t stop myself from thinking what if Robin’s the next patient? What if the baby needs something—”

“Spinelli fixed the codes. And installed a firewall,” she reminded him gently, touching his arm. “And if I’m back to work, you know you can call me. I’ll work on her case and watch everything like a hawk. Any nurse would, but—”

“But you know what could happen,” Patrick finished. He rubbed his chest with a lightly fisted hand. “Yeah. Yeah. I know Spinelli did everything he could to make the system safe, and everyone’s happier, but—”

“But,” she said with a nod when he stopped talking. “You don’t have to tell me. We’re still short-staffed, and I overheard Epiphany saying we lost two more nurses.”

“I don’t want you to worry about any of that—”

“But I do. Gram and I were talking about the nursing program. How much it meant to both of us. And what the hospital means to our family. To Jason’s—” she looked at him now, trapped with Monica who had brought baby photos of Jason for them to compare to Jake. Jason held them in his hand and Monica had Jake in her arms, smiling broadly. “The hospital matters, Patrick. It’s given me so much. I want to find a way to give back. I know it’s not as simple as just asking Jason for the money. I’ve thought about it, but—”

“We can’t afford any, uh, questions about the source,” Patrick said with a sigh, and she nodded, making a face. “Yeah. I’m getting to the point where I don’t care, but that’s just desperation.”

“We’ll figure it out, Patrick. Somehow.”

Nadine’s Apartment: Living Room

The electric keyboard wasn’t the same as the piano back home, and it was hard to really get lost in the music the way he used to with it propped on the coffee table, bumping into his knees, but it was better than nothing.

He didn’t know how long Nadine was gone and he didn’t hear the door when it opened again, but he felt the mood in the apartment shift, the energy change. He glanced towards the door, saw Nadine leaning against it, her expression pensive.

He let the piece he was playing trail off. “Sorry, I know it’s getting late—”

“I like listening to you play.” Nadine toed off her sneakers, then curled up in the armchair next to the sofa. “Which one is that? I’ve heard it before.”

“Moonlight Sonata. Beethoven,” he added. “I know it by heart. Don’t even have to look at the keys anymore.” He demonstrated by keeping his eyes on her face while his fingers danced across the keys, playing the next stanza.

“Probably loses some of its power on a dinky keyboard propped up on a coffee table,” Nadine said with a sigh.

“A little.” He switched off the keyboard, then flexed his fingers. “Are we still fighting?”

“No. I just—I want you to ignore Maxie the next time she starts—” Nadine held up a hand when Johnny opened his mouth to protest. “She visited Lulu in the hospital every day. Going back and forth between Kate Howard’s controlling cousin and sitting for hours, chattering away at a woman who never answered.”

Johnny exhaled, dropped his gaze down to the black and white piano keys. “They weren’t even that close. She’s being dramatic—”

“Maybe. Maybe she’s carrying the same guilt you do. Neither of you put Lulu in that bed or caused her to crawl inside herself and not come back. But you both carry the weight of it. You pretend it doesn’t matter, like it didn’t happen. And she attacks you—and me—because it feels better to have someone to blame.”

“I don’t—” Johnny closed his mouth. He couldn’t even finish the statement. “I don’t know what else to do.” He looked at her. “We all have to figure out how to cope, right? I pretend it didn’t happen, Maxie gets homicidal rage, and you smile at everyone trying to fix them. I mean, that’s how you’re handling the way people talk about you, right?”

“We’re not talking about me—” Nadine pushed herself to her feet, headed for the kitchen and to the bedroom beyond, but he followed her.

“You came to town because of what your sister did, you told me that. To put some good back into the world. How’s that working for you? You saved Nikolas’s life, and he walked out. You tried to help me, and look how that turned out—”

Nadine turned to face him, her expression strained. “I didn’t try to help because of Jolene. And that’s not why I tried to help Nikolas—”

“Really? Did you even know Nikolas? But you went out on every limb trying to save him from himself, forcing him to save his own life. And me? You threw away your whole life to help me. Who does that?”

“Oh, now you want to complain? Let’s remember who talked who into this, Johnny! That was you—” She jabbed a finger into his chest. “I wanted to go to the police, but you reminded me that they suck at doing the right thing and convinced me that getting married would solve our problems. Now you’re mad because I agreed?”

“That’s not what I meant—” Johnny started, but Nadine sliced her hand through the air.

“No! No! I’m sick of being told what I’m doing and why I’m doing it, okay? You don’t know me, you don’t know a damn thing about me! No one does. I’m not some piece of white trash chasing bank accounts or a useless girl who just wants to save the world—”

Johnny scowled. “Now who’s putting words in who’s mouth? I never said a word about the money. You refuse to take it, and who the hell called you white trash, because I sure as hell didn’t—” His scowl deepened when Nadine looked away. “Who’s calling you a gold digger, Nadine? Is that what they’re saying at the hospital? Because—”

“Forget it. Forget I said anything. Forget all of it. I don’t want to have this argument anymore. If you want to fight with Maxie everywhere, then fine. Do whatever makes you happy. What does it matter that all it does is humiliate me? It didn’t matter to Jolene, didn’t matter to Nikolas. Why would you be any different?”

She slammed the bedroom door before Johnny could say a word. He stood in the middle of the tiny kitchen, wondering what the hell he was supposed to do now.

Morgan Penthouse: Master Bedroom

Elizabeth held up the T-shirt with the Crimson Magazine logo scrawled across it, then looked at Jason across the room. “Well, maybe I should be relieved it’s not poison.”

“I didn’t even—” Jason came over, took the shirt and the gift bag which also included a few back issues of the magazine. Maxie had clearly just grabbed something on her way out of the office that evening. “I didn’t think about telling Spinelli not to invite her, I’m sorry—”

“It’s fine. I’m just surprised she even went to the trouble of giving me a gift, even a terrible one. It’s more than my parents have done in—” She considered. “Three or four years, maybe. Not since before Cameron.” She took the bag back from him, tossed it in the back of the closet, then slid her arms around his waist. “Thank you. For tonight.”

“It was your grandmother’s idea—”

“And I’ve thanked her already, but it still means a lot to me to have the people I love in one room—along with people I tolerate because I love you,” she teased and he managed a half-smile. “I wasn’t…I wasn’t sure what it would be like to celebrate this year. I barely even remember last year. But Em would be so mad if I let it ruin another year.”

Jason stroked her back, and Elizabeth laid her head against his chest. “I know.” He kissed the top of her head. “I know you talk about her a lot with the boys. Cameron mentioned her. Said he missed Aunt Em bringing him chocolate.”

“Every visit. Always had candy for them hidden somewhere,” she murmured, closing her eyes. “I always told her one day, it’ll be your turn, and I’ll slip your kids candy, so they’re all sugared up together.” Her breath was only a little shaky now. “I hate that she’ll never have that. That we’ll never get to be moms together. But I want to keep her memory fresh for the boys. She loved them so much, and I hate that she’ll be nothing more than a picture.”

“Michael and Sonny…that’s what they’ll be for Morgan,” Jason said, and she stilled, her fingers resting against the soft cotton fabric of his shirt. “He won’t remember having an older brother. A father.”

She tipped her head back, and their eyes met. “Maybe not. But we’ll remember, and we’ll share them with Morgan. We won’t let them be forgotten.” Then she tipped her head to the side and smiled. “And I haven’t forgotten about my plans to thank you properly for my gift this morning.”

And so I’m sailing through the sea
To an island where we’ll meet
You’ll hear the music fill the air
I’ll put a flower in your hair
Though the breezes, through the trees
Move so pretty you’re all I see
As the world keeps spinning round
You hold me right here right now
– Lucky, Jason Mraz & Colbie Caillat

---

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Morgan Penthouse: Master Bedroom

 Jason watched as Elizabeth finished dressing and sat on the edge of the bed, sliding into a pair of boots. She barely even winced at the pressure when she leaned over to slide the zipper up, then tugged her jeans down.

“I’m fine, you know,” she said, sliding him an amused glance out of the corner of her eye. “Leo’s doing me a favor to squeeze me in today so I can get back faster. I could have gone back a week ago.”

“I know. And I know you miss work,” Jason said. “It’s just—”

“You like when everyone you love is where you can see them.” But she was smiling when she said it. She crossed the room, leaned up to brush her mouth against his. He caught her hips, holding her in place to deepen the embrace. When he pulled back, he cupped her face with one hand, the other resting at the curve of her waist.

“It should be safe enough to go back to the hospital,” he told her. “Spinelli said the firewall he installed is holding up, and he apparently fixed whatever was causing those misfires.”

“It’s such a relief to know the patients will be safe. I just—” Elizabeth sighed. “I just wish we knew who did this. If it was someone trying to use me against you or just some evil hacker who just likes chaos—”

Jason grimaced, looked down. “Spinelli said he’s not going to stop looking for hints in the code, but with nothing else happening—”

“And everything else going quiet, I know it’s a long shot.” She kissed him again, then went over to the top of his dresser where she was keeping her jewelry box temporarily. A few pieces of gold glinted when she lifted the top to remove the watch she’d stowed the day before and a necklace.

He moved behind her, offering to help with the clasp. It was such a small thing, he thought, to brush her hair to one side and fasten the necklace together. He kissed the side of her neck she’d left bared, and she laughed, leaning back against him. Moments like this had been so rare over the last year, in the few hours they’d managed to scrape together in hotels and the safe house. But during the last month, as she’d recovered, they’d become constant. Daily. But he hoped he never took them for granted.

“Before you go downstairs—” Jason said, catching her hand as she started for the door. He opened the top of the drawer, drew out a thick, cream envelope and handed it to her. Elizabeth furrowed her brow.

“You didn’t have to—” But she broke off, blinking at what she pulled out. “It’s in Italian, I don’t—” Elizabeth squinted, then looked at him. “Is this—is this property? There’s an address I think.”

“It’s a flat in Venice,” Jason told her. “I—I rented for the next year.”

“You—” Elizabeth pressed her lips together, then took a deep breath. “For a year?”

“I don’t know when we can go. How long things will be quiet, or when you’ll feel comfortable taking time from work again,” Jason said. “I know you’re worried about the hospital. And the boys are getting used to everything. We’ll be back in the house—but I didn’t forget about Italy.”

“I didn’t—I didn’t think you did.”

“So this is waiting. Whenever you want to go. Maybe we can go more than once. We could take the boys this summer or we can go somewhere else—” He broke off when Elizabeth came forward, wrapped her arms around his neck, letting the papers fall to the ground and kissed him hard. He buried his hands in her hair, losing himself in the way she felt against him, the taste, the knowledge that he didn’t have to let her go, that this was his normal—

“Do we have enough time for me to thank you properly?” Elizabeth murmured, her fingers sliding slowly down his collarbone, down his chest, towards the buckle of his jeans.

“Not unless you want to miss your doctor’s appointment,” Jason murmured against her mouth.

Elizabeth made a face then sighed, stepping back. “Okay, fine. But tonight, you’d better be home on time.”

“That’s not going to be a problem.”

Kelly’s: Courtyard

Maxie scrolled through the list on her notes app, pursing her lips. “I just know I’m missing something—oof!” She crashed into Spinelli’s back, then glared up at him. “Hey! What gives—”

Spinelli turned, put his hands on her shoulders to keep her from going around him. “The Jackal suddenly has a craving for Mexican—”

“It’s nine in the morning, Spinelli, you can have guacamole later—” Maxie arched her head, then narrowed her eyes. When she looked back at Spinelli, the blue had gone flinty. “Did you just not want me to see that son of a bitch and the trash he dragged through the door?”

“Maximista—” Spinelli winced when his girlfriend shoved him to one side, yanked open the door, and was over the threshold before he could recover his balance. With a reluctant sigh, he went after her.

Maxie had stopped in front of a table and planted both hands on her hips. “You got a lot of nerve coming here, don’t you know that?”

Nadine set the cup of coffee in her hand on the table, her lips thinning. She didn’t look up, but the man across from her was already pushing his chair back. “Johnny, don’t—don’t—”

But the Sceptic Son was not listening. He got to his feet. “No, I’m getting really tired of you going after me or Nadine every time you see us in public. What do you want me to do, hide in the apartment until you’ve decided I get to move on?” he demanded.

Though Johnny towered over her, Maxie only lifted her chin. “I think you should have waited until the ink was dry on Lulu’s transfer papers, you low-down lying cheating piece of scum, and you—you—” She jabbed a finger at Nadine. “Pretending to give a damn about Lu, checking on her, don’t think I don’t know what you were doing—”

“You only give a damn now because you feel guilty!” Johnny shot back, his face flushed. “You weren’t even friends!”

“We were going to be! We would have been, okay? You don’t know! You don’t know anything! I wanted to tell the truth and so did she, but you wouldn’t let us! And now look what happened!”

“Oh, you’ve got one hell of a way of rewriting history, you little twit—”

Spinelli winced as Maxie’s face flushed an even deeper shade of scarlet, then looked at Nadine sinking lower into her chair, her head in her hands. “Maximista, perhaps we should—”

“No! No! This is my town, okay? Mine! And Lu’s. We were here first. You don’t get to chase me out of this diner. Her family owns it, and you’re in here flaunting your cheap imitation whore—”

“You’d know all about cheap imitation, wouldn’t you? What shade of box dye is that on your head?”

The sound that emerged from Maxie’s mouth might have been meant to be a growl, but the pitch of her voice made it more like an angry squeak. She snatched a glass of orange juice from the table and dashed its contents in Johnny’s face. Before he could do anything but blink, she’d grabbed Nadine’s pancakes and launched them. Johnny dried to dodge it, pancakes going flying, but the plate hit him in the corner of the jaw.

“Hey, hey, hey—okay, okay—” Spinelli grabbed Maxie’s hands when she went for a plate of home fries in front of a stunned customer. “Okay, let’s go. We’re going. We’re going. Now.”

“No, no, I’m just getting started!” Maxie tried to kick out at Johnny even as Spinelli dragged her backwards towards the door. “Let me at him! Let me shove a hash brown down his throat so I can watch him choke—”

She was still making threats of breakfast food violence when Spinelli finally got her out the door and into the courtyard.

Johnny scowled, flicking bits of pancake and syrup from his long-sleeved shirt. He looked at Nadine. “You were right. We should have stayed in.”

Her head snapped up, her blue eyes no less furious than the woman who’d just been dragged out. She jerked her purse off the back of the chair, and headed for the door, yanking her coat from the rack on her way.

Johnny sighed, looked over at the shell-shocked waitress. “So, uh, I’ll cover everyone’s tab here, and uh, extra for the cleanup.”

Metro Court Hotel: Restaurant

 Bobbie pressed a finger to her temple, then sighed. “All right. All right, thank you, Penny. I’ll look into it. Thank you. I’d be lost without you.” She closed her phone just as Carly slid into the seat across from her. “Good morning. I’d almost given up hope.”

“Sorry.” Carly dropped a napkin over her lap. “I would have called but I left my phone off the charger last night, and didn’t realize until I was in the car, and it was dead. One of those mornings.” She nodded at the phone next to her mother’s plate. “Who were you talking to?”

“Penny. She’s been acting manager at Kelly’s for the last few months, but I need to find someone permanent. Apparently, Maxie started throwing breakfast food at Johnny Zacchara in the middle of the breakfast rush.” Bobbie made a face. “A beautiful girl, but she didn’t inherit a lick of common sense from either of her parents.”

“Considering what she pulled on Lucky two years ago,” Carly said, smiling up at the waitress who poured her coffee, “I’d think she had more Spencer in her than Felicia Jones.”

“I’d love to argue that point with you, but I simply can’t.” Bobbie tipped her head. “You’re not going to comment on Johnny Zacchara being pelted with sausages?”

Carly arched a brow, then folded her arms on the table. “Am I supposed to root for Maxie because Johnny’s the top suspect in what happened to Sonny? He has an alibi, Mama. He was with Nadine, proposing marriage. Ask anyone.”

“Carly.”

“Are you wearing a wire or something? I thought this was just breakfast, not an interrogation.” Carly picked up her coffee and sipped it. “Jason handled all of that, and if he’s satisfied, so am I. Aren’t you proud of me for not going off half-cocked and making a mess?”

“Proud? Worried, maybe. Carly—”

“Did Kelly’s survive the food fight or what? Are you going to have Maxie arrested?”

“No. No. Johnny paid for the whole thing and stayed to clean up. But since we’re on the subject of Johnny Zacchara—”

“Are we?”

“You were supposed to talk to Patrick yesterday about Sonny. I’m guessing from the lack of a phone call last night, the meeting didn’t go well.”

“It went…” Carly hesitated. “It went the way I thought it would. No change. Not in brain activity or the prognosis. I’ve called Silver Water.”

“You—” Bobbie blinked. “Already? What does Jason say?”

“Jason is living his life, enjoying his family just the way I promised him. He hasn’t been involved in any of it. And I’m not talking to him about it, either. Not tonight.”

“Well, no, of course not tonight, but—”

“Then why are we having this conversation?” Carly snapped, and Bobbie closed her mouth. Carly sighed, dragged her hands down her face. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I just—it doesn’t change anything. Talking about it. Going to see him. None of it. Sonny is gone. And talking to Jason about it—I don’t want to do it. Okay? Because that makes it all real and I don’t want to do that until I know Silver Water can take him. Jason’s been through too much this last year for me to pile more on his plate until I have to. Can that be enough? Can we please talk about something else?”

Crimson Pointe: Living Room

“I don’t like it.”

Claudia rolled her eyes, ignored her father, and turned the page in her fashion magazine. She heard the sound of the wheels on his chair as he drew closer to her but continued not to give him the satisfaction.

“Hey, Jezebel—”

“You know, Daddy, there are a lot of other wicked women you could go with. Delilah. Eve. I like Athaliah,” Claudia said, lowering the magazine in time to see her father’s bushy brows draw together.

“What are you babbling about?”

“Athaliah. Jezebel’s daughter.” She returned her attention to the magazine. “She was married to the King of Judah and murdered her grandchildren after his death to keep the throne. A woman who’d do anything to secure her power. Seems more accurate.”

“I don’t want to debate the damned Bible with you!”

“Then find a new insult.” She finally closed the magazine. “Other than me, what’s making you unhappy today?”

Anthony leaned back, contemplative — never a good sign, Claudia thought. “How’s your brother?”

“You know as well as I do. Probably better since you’re having them tailed. Don’t make that face, no one told me.” She shrugged. “That’s just standard operations.” She rose to her feet, crossed the room to the breakfast buffet. “Let me guess, Mary Sunshine goes to work and comes home, and Johnny doesn’t leave the apartment much.”

“Sometimes the girl goes jogging,” Anthony muttered. “But I didn’t ask what he’s doing. I asked—”

“Don’t tell me you’re concerned about John’s mental health.” Claudia popped a grape in her mouth. “Since his first memory is probably the bullet you put in his mother—”

“I don’t know why I bother with you,” Anthony growled. “He won’t return my calls. And for some damned reason, he’ll talk to you. So go up there and find out what the hell is going on.”

“You almost sound worried. Touching.” Claudia folded her arms. “Look if you’re worried the nurse will get cold feet and turn John in for the shooting, I think we’re in the clear. If that were going to happen, it would have been weeks ago. Sonny’s not waking up, so everyone is in the clear—”

“Every time we think we’ve got things under control with that boy, he screws it up. Do what I tell you.”

She considered refusing just for fun, but since she was a little worried herself — John had more of a moral compass than he should considering his family background, and, well, there were just some family secrets that needed to stay under wraps.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll give him a call. I bet he’s bored enough by now to have lunch or something this week.” She smirked. “And how desperate are you to be coming to me for help?”

“It’s time you earned your keep,” Anthony muttered. “Shut up and do what you’re told.”

General Hospital: Nurse’s Station

Patrick held out a hand to his secretary, his attention divided between the phone in the crook of his shoulder and the screen in front of him. “I heard you the first time, Archie, that’s not changing the fact that we’re short staffed and if we can’t even keep up with the turnover in the nursing staff—”

He felt the papers drop in his hand, and he curled his fist around them, giving his secretary a distracted nod and glanced down at the clutch of pink phone messages. “No, I don’t just need six new nursing positions, I need to find three replacements for the ones that just quit—don’t start—yeah, that’s what I thought.” He tossed the phone aside, and it nearly fell off the base.

“Someone’s in a bad mood,” Leo murmured as he came up behind Patrick, catching the phone before it clattered to the ground. “Bad day?”

“Bad month.”

“It’s November 1.”

“Two nurses quit,” Patrick retorted. “And we never found a replacement for the one who left two weeks ago. Please, please tell me that you cleared Elizabeth to come back. Or I am going to jump off the roof.”

“Relax.” Leo leaned back against the counter. “She’ll be ready to come back in a few days. And she does the work of two nurses, so you’re almost in the clear. Things are okay, Patrick. Not a single misfire in more than three weeks—”

“Oh, and that makes it all better? I’m glad that problem is fixed, but I’m still putting out a thousand fires in another department—” Patrick hesitated over one of the pink messages.

“More bad news?” Leo asked, craning to look over his shoulder. “The old man?”

Patrick crumbled the message in his hand. Another call from Noah Drake who’d returned to his position in Arizona. “He can keep calling. It’s not going to change the fact that I don’t have time for him.”

“You’re just not going to talk to your dad for the rest of your life? Come on, man. He’s got your liver rolling around in him—” Leo stopped when Matt stepped up to the counter. He closed his mouth.

Patrick flicked another message from Noah into the trash, ignoring Matt. They’d had their moment in the locker room a month earlier and had gone their separate ways. Elizabeth was right — not seeing the kid as an enemy was better, but that didn’t make them friends. Or brothers.

“You know better, Leo. The liver regenerates.” Patrick tapped the side of his abdomen. “All grown back like it never happened. I have enough to worry about without thinking about what a disappointment Noah Drake ended up being. Turns out I was right all those years. He’s not worth knowing. I have somewhere to be.”

And with that he dumped the rest of the messages in the trash and left the hub without looking back.

Harborview Towers: Hallway

“I can’t wait to get back to work,” Elizabeth told her grandmother as they approached the door. “I mean, I’m going to miss you being here, don’t get me wrong, but—”

“It’ll be good for all of us to get back to normal, but—” Audrey stopped Elizabeth before she could twist the doorknob. “I’m so grateful, darling, that I came to stay. That I took this opportunity to be with you and the boys. To get to know Jason.”

“And your verdict?” Elizabeth asked with a quirk of her brow.

Audrey’s lips twitched. “You know very well that I’ve been impressed. Not just with how he treats the boys, I never really had any worries on that end. But in how he treats you. Best of all, my darling, in how he looks at you when you don’t know it.”

Elizabeth’s breath caught. “What—what do you mean?”

“There is a great deal about Jason that I will never be able to wrap my mind around, or put a complete seal of approval on, but oh, he just looks at you as if you’re the center of his world. The sun rises and sets on you and those boys for him. I think I can understand why you’d take the rest of it.” Audrey squeezed Elizabeth’s hand. “I can go home, knowing for certain that you and my great-grandchildren are in good hands. With someone who finally understands how special all three of you are.”

“Gram—” Elizabeth swallowed hard. “I wasn’t expecting—that’s the really the best birthday present I could have gotten tonight.”

“Oh, well, why don’t we put that to the test?”

“What?” Elizabeth’s brow furrowed in confusion, but then her grandmother pushed the door open.

“Surprise!”  Noise spilled out from the living room, including a mixture of cheers, noisemakers, and a pop of confetti. Cameron raced across the room to his mother, Jake on his heels.

“What’s all this?” Elizabeth said, crouching down to give both her boys a hug. She looked around, unable to take it all in. Monica and Bobbie were by the fireplace, Carly and Patrick milling by the pool table. Jason coming up behind the boys to pick up Cameron so that Elizabeth could lift Jake, and both boys were being held.

“What is this—” Elizabeth looked at Jason with wide eyes.

“Happy birthday, Mommy!” Cameron declared, wrapping his arms around her neck. “You the prettiest! We got you cake!”

“I like cake,” Jake said, leaning his head against his father’s shoulder. “Frosting.”

“Happy birthday,” Jason said, kissing her cheek. “I told you I’d be home on time.”

“You did.” She grinned at him. “I guess our plans will have to wait.”

“I’m not going anywhere.”

Tell my mother, tell my father
I’ve done the best I can
To make them realize this is my life
I hope they understand
I’m not angry, I’m just saying
Sometimes goodbye is a second chance
– Second Chance, Shinedown

---

Friday, October 31, 2008

Morgan Penthouse: Master Bedroom

Elizabeth dug through the closet, wondering how it seemed that half her wardrobe had ended up in the penthouse and how they were ever going to get everything back to the house.

Behind her, Jason had emerged from the bathroom, towel drying his hair. “Is your grandmother going with you today?”

“What? Oh. No. No. Jake still has a little bit of the sniffles, and I didn’t want him to go out,” she said. “I know we’re only going to go trick or treating here in the building tonight, but I don’t want him to get sicker.” She retrieved a sweater, then hesitated, running her fingers over the soft fabric.

“Are you okay?” Jason wanted to know when she didn’t continue.

“It’s—this sweater. I—I borrowed it from Emily. I never got a chance to give it back.” She looked at him. “It’s—I mean, it’s today.”

“Yeah. I know.”  His expression tightened and he went to his own dresser. She bit her lip. Of course he knew. Did she think he’d forget the anniversary of his sister’s murder?

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t—I don’t know.” She sat on the bed, the sweater in her lap, running her fingers over it. “Do we acknowledge it? Do we go on like it never happened?”

Jason pulled a long-sleeved shirt over his head, then looked at her, a bit exasperated. “Why is that up to me? Why do we have to do anything? It happened. We both know it’s awful. We don’t have to talk about it.”

She bristled. “Maybe I want to talk about it, okay? What am I supposed to do? Nikolas and Lucky are both gone, so it’s not like I can call them. Or that I’d want to. No one else—never mind. Never mind. I’m sorry.” She crumbled the sweater up, stalked over the wastebasket in the corner, shoved it in.

Jason’s arms came around her, drawing her back against his chest. She felt his breath at her temple, and she let out a long shaky sigh. “I’m sorry,” he murmured into her hair. “I’m sorry.”

She brought her hands up to touch his arm, to pull it down so that she could turn and look at him. “I’m sorry, too. It’s just—you know, you go through every day and you think you’ve handled it, and you’ve moved on, and then you just get hit with it, and you remember all over again, and I’m sorry, because you lost her, too, and it’s just not right—”

“I know.” Jason kissed her temple, then leaned down to remove the sweater from the trash. “I miss her. All the time.”

“I look at the boys, and I just think—she never gets to be here with them. She loved them so much.” Elizabeth lifted her gaze to his. “She loved you so much, Jason. Even when you drove her crazy or disagreed with her. You were her rock. The one piece of her world that she could always rely on.” She laid her hand on his cheek. “Because you were an amazing brother who never let her down. I hope you know that. The only regret you should have about Em is that we didn’t get enough time with her. Because there will never be enough. And I’m sorry. I’m sorry if it hurts to talk about her.”

“That’s—that’s why we should,” Jason said finally, forcing the words out. He laid his hand over hers. “Because I want the boys to know her. I know she loved them. And she loved you. I’m so glad my sister had you. That you were her best friend.”

“She was the first person I told. About there being a possibility that Jake was yours. It’s why I had the courage to tell you so we could get the test.” Elizabeth closed her eyes. “I wish I’d confided in her after the test came back. I don’t know why I didn’t. She would have told me to tell you. I was so scared, so scared everything would come crashing down if you knew. If everyone knew. Lucky would relapse, and you’d have trouble with Sam, and be unhappy, and I’d be alone—I was such a coward. I kept it all inside because I knew if I told her, she’d tell me to suck it up and do the right thing.” Elizabeth brushed away her tears. “There’s no one left who knew me the way she did, you know? And she never gets to marry Nikolas and have her happy ending. She wanted to be a mother, and all of that—God, I hate it so much. There’s too much left we still should be doing together…Why is she gone? Why can’t she just come back?”

Jason curled his arms around her, and they sat there for a long time, just thinking of the life that had been lost.

General Hospital: Patrick’s Office

“This feels like déjà vu,” Carly murmured, skimming the scan Patrick had slid across the desk. She looked at him on the other side of the desk. “It’s eerie, isn’t it? To be sitting here, having the same conversation we had six months ago.” She glanced at the empty space next to her where Jax would have been.

“I know that you have joint power of attorney,” Patrick said. “We can wait to make these decisions, and I can talk to Jason if you want—”

“No, it’s—” Carly set the scans back on the desk, carefully arranging them so that the edges lined up. “I made a promise to myself after Elizabeth’s accident — after I caused that ridiculous scene, and Jason basically threw me out of the room — I told myself that I was going to do everything I could to make his life easier.”

“Okay,” Patrick said slowly, and she thought she detected some skepticism. Well-earned no doubt. “But this is a big decision—”

“You’d think that, but it was a big decision in April. In May when we finally went through with it. I agonized over it. We talked to so many other doctors, and no one disagreed with you.” Carly’s smile was faint. “You’re the best neurosurgeon on the east coast, maybe the country. You’re telling me that Sonny isn’t dead, but he’s not a vegetable. Maybe he’ll wake up one day, and maybe he won’t. But you’re not hopeful.”

“No. There’s some brain activity, but it’s not brain death.”

Carly nodded, sliding her fingers over the lines depicting the brain activity on the page. “And we’ve waited. Just like Michael. Nothing’s changed. Not in a month of waiting. Is it wrong to wish it were brain death? That we could say for sure?”

“No. It’s not. What’s happening to Sonny, what happened with Michael — the ambiguity is almost worse than the clarity of death.” Patrick leaned forward. “Do you mourn? Do you pack up their things? How do you go on when someone who matters so much is somewhere between life and death, and might never move one way or the other?”

“Sometimes,” Carly said, “sometimes I wish I’d never met him. Even if that meant I was still married to AJ, trapped in a horrible marriage. One I chose to make horrible, mind you. You don’t know AJ — you came here after he died. I didn’t push him over the edge, you know, but I sure had no problem making sure he lived on the precipice, making sure that Michael would never know him.” She exhaled, her breath a bit shaky. “Maybe Sonny was a good father, but if AJ had been in his life, do you know where my baby would be right now?”

“Carly—”

“He’d be in school.” Carly met Patrick’s gaze, though his features were blurred through her tears. “He’d be spending time with his cousins. He was supposed to be in sixth grade this year, you know? He’d be twelve in December. I’ll never know what he could have been. Who he’d grow up to be. What kind of man he’d turn into. I don’t know. I know none of this matters. None of this has anything to do with Sonny or the decisions I have to make now. It’s just…I don’t know. Sonny’s gone. And I don’t know what to do with the fact that I don’t even feel grief. Or anger. It’s just a relief. How horrible am I to feel relieved that my little boy is losing his father? That Kristina is losing hers? What kind of person does that make me? Don’t answer that,” Carly said when Patrick opened his mouth. “Just — I’ll talk to Jason. He hasn’t been to see Sonny, so I have to find a way to talk to him about this.”

“There’s no hurry,” Patrick said. “He wouldn’t be our only long-term coma patient, but I don’t have to tell you he wouldn’t get the personal attention here that he would in another facility.”

“I know. And I’m sure the answer will be yes. I just—it’s Halloween, and I’m taking Morgan to trick or treat with his cousins. Elizabeth’s birthday is tomorrow — Jason deserves to have this time, and I’m going to make sure he has it. So I just—I’ll talk to him. Thank you, Patrick. You’ve always been kinder to me than I deserve. I’ll be in touch.”

General Hospital: Nurse’s Hub

When the elevator doors slid opened and Nadine saw Leyla standing by the computer in the hub, she nearly pressed another button for another floor. But she was an adult and there was no amount of avoidance that would change anything. For whatever reason, their budding friendship had been a casualty of Nadine’s impulsive decision to marry Johnny Zacchara.

And if she were honest with herself, it was a relief to know now that Leyla wasn’t someone to be counted on. If Leyla could cut her off so neatly without even bothering to ask questions, then Nadine was better off.

But it didn’t make working together any easier, especially as they’d both been floated to the general ward this rotation.

Nadine took a deep breath, then went over to the counter to exchange charts for her next round of checks. “Any new admits this morning?”

Leyla glanced over at her, then back at the screen. “No. Still the same as last night.”

“Good. Good. It’s a relief to be out of the ICU, but I hope we can start getting back to our usual departments. I miss Pediatrics,” Nadine said, picking up her new charts. “I’m sure you miss surgery.”

“I’m surprised you feel that way considering how you’ve used your time,” Leyla said coolly.

Nadine tensed. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“Well, you’ve made it quite the habit of attaching yourself to our more…wealthy patients,” Leyla said. “It didn’t take you long to move on after Nikolas was done with you—”

“Oh, that is absolutely not what happened, and you damn well know it! Nikolas and I had barely even started dating when he decided to go, and yes, that hurt, but there’s no law that says I have to wait to move on—”

“No, but you certainly took advantage of Johnny’s situation, didn’t you? Just like you did with Nikolas. Constantly checking in on him, pushing him to get that surgery, hoping to make yourself indispensable—” Leyla sniffed. “He saw through you, just like I did, and well, maybe you and Johnny Zacchara deserve each other. You’re no better than your sister. Money hungry white trash.”

Crimson Offices: Reception

Maxie emerged from Kate’s office, flipping through memos with one hand, a phone tucked in the crook of her neck. “No, Dinah, I want to push that photo shoot another few days. Kate will be back in the office by then and I know she wants to be there.”

She only half-listened to the response, dropping the memos on her desk. She rummaged for her date book. “Yeah, it’ll be great to have her back. She’s been consulting and signing off from the hospital and from home, but there’s nothing like having her here—” Maxie broke off, the other desk in the area catching her eye.

The empty desk with a chair tucked neatly under it, a discarded jacket over the back of it. The office could get chilly, and Lulu kept something handy for those days. There were no active projects or files on her desk, just her phone and a handful of photos, including one of Lulu with her mother during her parents’ wedding.

“What?” Maxie returned her attention to the call. “No, no, it’ll be good to be back to normal. It was a terrible tragedy. Just…just a terrible, awful day. But it’s time to turn the page. Thanks for the reschedule. Kate will be so grateful, and I certainly won’t forget it either.”

Nadine’s Apartment: Kitchen

He should have been a mechanic. Or a carpenter. An electrician. Something useful.

He should have learned how to do more than shove frozen food in the oven or microwave and click a button.

Johnny studied the inside of Nadine’s cabinet with a squinted expression. Was it really hard to boil water? Surely he could make pasta. He was Italian. Wasn’t that shit in the blood? He took out a package of dried spaghetti and a jar of red sauce.

In the last month, he’d done basically nothing. He’d sleep through most of the day, waking in the early afternoon. He’d watch some daytime television, or lately, he’d been walking around Nadine’s neighborhood. It was okay, he thought. Partially residential, partially business. There was a decent diner on the corner, and he’d found a music store with a piano, so that took care of some of the hours. He was thinking about an electric keyboard that could be folded up and put away.

Nadine worked days mostly, and when she came home, she was usually tired so they ordered out. Johnny had managed to convince her early on to let him go half on everything, including her rent, so the extra takeout expense was on him. But they went to the same places over and over, and that was kind of annoying.

It was also blessedly normal. What to do with his day, what to eat, when to sleep, how to use the laundry machines in the basement of Nadine’s building — the first few weeks had been almost interesting. He’d talked to his sister a few times, had even spoken to his father, though he’d kept his distance, maybe to test how Anthony was going to handle things.

The PCPD had left him alone — Scott was still glaring at him whenever they ran into one another, so Johnny tried to avoid him. Sonny’s case was cold, and so was Kate’s. There was no news on Lulu, so he’d put all of that out of his mind.

This was life now. Figuring out how to fill the days until Nadine came home and they could eat dinner, watch movies, and go to bed. Ordinary.

But maybe he should learn how to cook. Johnny retrieved his laptop, flipped it open, and opened up a search engine.

How to boil water

Patrick’s Condo: Nursery

“I’m as big as a house,” Robin muttered, tossing another plastic hanger in the trash, and handing the onesie to her mother. “How did you stand being pregnant?”

“Well, darling, you were kind enough to arrive several days before the doctor said you were due,” Anna said with a smile. She closed a drawer in the changing table. “How many more of these did you want to run through the laundry today?”

“Just this last batch. Elizabeth said Jake went through a few outfits a day no matter what she did, and I just don’t know between me and Patrick, and moving—” Robin wrinkled her nose. “How am I supposed to get this kid out of me? She’s three days past due.”

“Well, it’s not an exact science, love, but think of it this way. You’ve provided such a warm, comfortable home for my grandbaby that she’s not interested in eviction.” Anna laid her hands on Robin’s belly, waited for the kick. “There you are. Why don’t you come out and see us?”

“I’m trying hot sauce tonight,” Robin decided. “Now that we have a closing date, I just want to get on with it all, you know? We weren’t even going to be put an offer on anything unless we really loved it, but I saw that a house across from Elizabeth was available, and I just—I couldn’t help myself.”

“Well, you’ve told me she’s become a good friend to you, and of course, I know she’s special to Patrick. And from what I hear, you’ll have another old friend living across the way.” Anna lifted the laundry basket. “I commend you for having such a good friendship with Jason. It took me far longer to be friends with your father.”

Robin followed her mother into the living room, her expression pinched. “Well, it’s not like that happened overnight. We were basically enemies by the time I left. It’s just—I don’t know. We both went through a lot while I was gone, and now I’m home, and we’ve just both moved on. We were friends before we were in love.”

“I only remember Jason as a child, obviously, but it’s so strange to think of Alan and Monica’s son as, well…” Anna set the laundry basket on the table. “Jason Morgan. His name has come across my files once or twice. Not as a target,” she added when Robin blinked at her. “There was some business with the Alcazar brothers that the WSB was keeping their eye on. To think that a boy you played with as a child could grow up to be involved with men like that—”

“Mom. It’s a little late to be judging my ex-boyfriends. Especially since I’m engaged to a neurosurgeon, and not Jason.”

“No, I’ll let Elizabeth’s parents worry about her. Or her grandmother. Who seems to approve since she’s living with them.”

“Oh, that’s just temporary,” Robin said. She went into the kitchen to find something to eat — something she could put hot sauce on. “While Elizabeth recovered from her concussion, and everything that was going on after the wedding, it was just easier to be at the Towers. But I think Liz said she was hoping to go back home by the holidays or after that. The boys need a backyard.”

“Everything after the wedding?” Anna echoed.

“What, were you living under a rock or something? Didn’t they get the news on your last assignment?” Robin asked. “Kate was shot at her wedding. It was chaos, and then Elizabeth had an accident. Lucky up and left the boys basically overnight, which just made it worse. And—” She looked down. “Well, what happened with Sonny. I think Jason just wanted to make sure everyone was safe. He’s lost a lot of people.”

“I did hear about Emily last year. Such a tragedy. And Michael. That’s awful.”

“Alan, I think, hit Jason harder than he thought it would. They always had such a hard relationship after the accident, and I think he has regrets.” Robin sighed. “But I guess it’s been quiet. Not that I’d know, but everything seems calmer. I’m glad. Jason needed a break. Whatever was going on, it feels like it’s over.”

Robin busied herself heating up the wings from the night before and missed the expression of speculation that crossed her mother’s face.

Coffee House: Office

Francis knocked on the open door. “Hey, do you have a minute?”

“Yeah, but I have to go—” Jason glanced at the clock. “In maybe ten minutes. We’re eating early tonight, and I want to be there before Carly.” Carly was mostly behaving herself, but it was still better to be present when she and Elizabeth were together. Carly had a way of sneaking in a dig that the kids wouldn’t understand, but Elizabeth absolutely would. Jason wasn’t interested in testing the limits of her patience, not today of all days.

“Ah, yeah, that’s a good idea. Mrs. C. never did like her much. Can’t imagine why,” Francis said dryly. “Anyway, you said Mrs. Hardy was heading back to Maple Avenue next week?”

“Yeah. Did you get the rotation set up?”

“Yep. She’ll have round the clock surveillance. I put some of the guys from Greystone on it. They’re used to sitting around and watching a house,” Francis said. “And I made it clear that she’s on Bobbie Spencer’s level when it comes to protection. So she’s good to go.”

“Thanks. I appreciate that. Not just because she has the boys with her sometimes, but—”

“She’s family, I get you.” Francis lifted the photo of Elizabeth and the boys, then looked at Jason. “Nice to see it out of the drawer.”

Jason took the frame back, nearly said nothing, then changed his mind. “You were right, you know. About when Sonny was at his best.” He set the frame on the desk. “I have to get home for Halloween.”

Nadine’s Apartment: Living Room

Nadine shoved the door open, and was already halfway across the room before she realized Johnny was in the kitchen, standing over the sink, holding up a clump of noodles, steam rising from the colander below it.

She furrowed her brow, looked behind her. “Did I come to the right apartment?”

Johnny turned, glowered. “It’s not funny.”

“I’m not—” Nadine felt a tickle in her throat, pressed her lips together. “I’m not laughing.”

“You are—” Johnny dropped the clump back into the plastic container, scowling at it. “I don’t know what I did wrong.”

Nadine dropped her handbag on the sofa, kicked off her shoes, and went over to him. Next to the sink, she saw a laptop opened to a how to article about —

“Boiling pasta,” she read, lifting her brows. What would it be like, she wondered, to have to look up such basic information? Aunt Rayleen had made sure Nadine and Jolene could look after themselves. That they’d never be like their mother, trapped by a man. They had careers and basic survival skills.

Which included boiling water.

“You know, it doesn’t look that bad actually.” Nadine opened a nearby cabinet, retrieved a bottle of olive oil. “Here, mix in a teaspoon of that.”

Johnny looked at her skeptically but obeyed the instructions — even though she had to correct which spoon he grabbed from the drawer. Eventually, with her help, they were able to salvage some of the pasta.

“Put that in before you boil the water, and it helps the pasta not to stick later, but it works after, too.” Nadine twisted the cap back on the oil. “Isn’t this usually our Chinese night?”

“Yeah, but I didn’t want another egg roll,” Johnny said. He lifted the cover over the sauce. “It doesn’t taste great, but I didn’t burn it, either.”

Nadine grinned at him, her terrible day forgotten. “Small victories. Let me show you some things we can add, and we’ll whip up some garlic bread.”