If someone said three years from now
You’d be long gone
I’d stand up and punch them out
‘Cause they’re all wrong and
That last kiss, I’ll cherish until we meet again
And time makes it harder, I wish I could remember
But I keep your memory, you visit me in my sleep
My darling, who knew?
– Who Knew, P!nk

---

Monday, November 3, 2008

Morgan Penthouse: Master Bathroom

 Elizabeth swirled the toothbrush beneath the faucet, dropping it back into the container just as Jason pushed the shower door open and stepped out, grabbing a white towel to wrap around his waist. She turned around, leaned against the counter, arched a brow. “You know, I could put off my meeting with Epiphany another day.”

He paused in the act of dragging another, smaller towel through his hair, confused for a moment, then grinned. “You could. But your grandmother is still here.”

She wrinkled her nose. “And if I ask her to take Cameron to school, she’ll just have questions. No, fair point.” She turned back to the sink, reached for the mouthwash and he came up next to her, retrieving his own toothbrush. “I like this part.”

Their eyes met in the mirror, and she went on, “And I hope I never take it for granted. That I get to stand here with you in the morning, at night. That we have this.”

“You won’t—I won’t,” he promised her.

She finished her mouthwash, left him in the bathroom so that she could shed her robe and pull out some clothes. As much as she’d enjoyed the last few weeks, recuperating at home with her boys, having her family around, it was time to get back to normal.

Or whatever normal would look like now that her life included Jason.

“We haven’t talked about the boys with you going back on rotation,” Jason said, emerging from the bathroom. “I know you had Jake in daycare, but—”

“But that’s not possible now,” she said, and he nodded. “I figured. I don’t want to hire a nanny just for my hours—”

“I know. That’s why I thought—I can work from here. It’s different now,” he continued. “I’m…I’m the one—”

“You’re the one sending people out to do your old job,” Elizabeth finished, and he nodded. “Okay.”

“You’re okay with that?”

“Yeah. Of course.” She smiled. “I want you to have time with Jake, and you wouldn’t take him anywhere that wasn’t safe.” She stroked his arm. “We can do this, Jason. As long as we talk to each other.”

“I love you.” He leaned down, kissed her. “I need to get Cameron to school.”

She didn’t bother to tell him that he didn’t need to keep doing that either. Elizabeth thought Jason liked doing those small domestic duties, all the little bits and pieces that came with being a father. She’d deprived him of so much time, so many opportunities. But that was over now.

It was time for everything that came next.

Nadine’s Apartment: Kitchen

He’d slept on the sofa the last two nights.

It really shouldn’t have bothered him, Johnny thought, switching on the coffee pot, listening to the hiss and pop of percolating caffeine. He was supposed to be on the sofa. That had always been the plan. Go to Vegas, get married to protect them both, come back to Port Charles, and figure out how to handle everything else — but sleeping on the sofa was understood.

He’d changed it all — he’d reached for Nadine that first morning in Vegas because he’d wanted to, and because she’d looked so skeptical that anyone would believe he wanted her—and he’d kept reaching for her, even when she’d expressed doubts about the way they were complicating everything.

Until Saturday. Until he’d fought with Maxie again. Until Nadine had looked at him and reminded him point blank that this was temporary. That they were only in this mess because Lulu had lost herself, had been whisked away to California where he couldn’t even see her. That Maxie was furious that Johnny had married someone else only days later.

And he hadn’t been able to charm Nadine out of her anger, hadn’t been able to smile and flirt his way back to safety, so he’d turned on her, throwing her kindness back in her face—

He cringed now, thinking about it.

“You came to town because of what your sister did, you told me that. To put some good back into the world. How’s that working for you? You saved Nikolas’s life, and he walked out. You tried to help me, and look how that turned out—”

What an asshole. All she’d done since that night in the hospital was look after him, to do what was best for him. She’d done whatever she could to keep the PCPD and Scott Baldwin from dragging him to court again—even though this time he was actually guilty.

And that sat uncomfortably—the knowledge that Johnny was responsible for putting Sonny Corinthos in a coma. Maybe it had been self-defense, but it didn’t change what he’d done.

All Nadine had asked him to do was avoid Maxie. Not to engage. Not to be part of the public scenes.

“If you want to fight with Maxie everywhere, then fine. Do whatever makes you happy. What does it matter that all it does is humiliate me? Why should that matter? It didn’t matter to Jolene, didn’t matter to Nikolas. Why would you be any different?”

He leaned against the counter, staring blindly at the linoleum floor. She’d asked him for one thing.

It was time to figure out how to get that for her — even if that meant finding a way to make peace with Maxie. Nadine deserved at least that much, if not more.

General Hospital: Patrick’s Office

Patrick grinned when he saw Elizabeth knock on his open door and came to hug her. “Hey, Epiphany said you were coming in today. We miss you.”

“I miss you guys, too,” Elizabeth said, sitting down. “Epiphany put me back on rotation starting Wednesday, so—” She nodded at his desk stacked with files. “You look busy. I should get out of your hair—”

He touched the top of the files, laying his hand across the manila folder. “No, it’s not—I mean, they’re patient files. I—I’m trying to organize things to take off for a week or two.”

“You’re actually going to take paternity leave? Like not come to work for an entire day?” Elizabeth wrinkled her nose. “Do you know how to do that?”

“I don’t really have any choice,” he said. “Robin can’t—and shouldn’t be alone for this.” He hesitated, looked at the files, then back at her. “You were alone, weren’t you?”

“With Cam? Yeah, sort of. I mean, I had my grandmother, but Lucky was there with Jake.” She looked down at her hands. “He had to do a lot of the work in the beginning—I was recovering from the complications. He…was really good with him.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up—”

“No, it’s okay. It’s—” Elizabeth scratched the edge of her brow, then shifted, uncomfortable. “You know, it’s easy sometimes, I think, to focus on how it ended. On the way he left. He didn’t even tell the boys goodbye. I know it’s partially my fault—”

“Jake, yeah, okay, that’s on you. But not Cam. Don’t let yourself get sucked into blaming yourself because that twerp couldn’t hack being a hands-on father when he didn’t get his way. Cameron was his kid before there ever was a Jake. And there was no call for him to up and leave that boy just because he was pissed at you.”

“I know that, but—”

“But nothing.” Patrick shoved away from the desk, restless. “You don’t get to be a dad when it’s convenient. You know, we’re joking about how hard it’s going to be for me to take some time off, but if I could take more than two weeks, I’d do it. Robin’s doing the hard part. All I gotta do is sit there and wait for someone to give me my kid. But when they give me my daughter, Elizabeth, you better believe I’d kill someone who tried to take her away. I wouldn’t walk away from her, and I haven’t even met her yet. I don’t need to hold her to love her. What kind of—” He broke off, looked away.

“We’re not about Lucky anymore, are we?” Elizabeth asked softly. “Patrick—”

“No. I just—” Patrick pressed his lips together, took a deep breath. “Jason told me Cam was there that morning. That he saw Lucky leave. And I don’t get that. I don’t. I don’t get how you can switch off like that. My father—he was there every day when I was a kid. And I thought he was the world’s best father until he dove into the bottle.” He looked at her. “How does that happen? How does he show up for me but Matt? He’s nothing to my dad. Not even a blip. Just a couple of checks a year, and he doesn’t have to think about anything else. Never held him. Never sat with him. And he lived all this time like Matt didn’t exist. How does that work? How do you love one kid and hate the other?”

“People are human,” Elizabeth said. She rose, crossed to him. “And no parent ever sets out to love one child more than the other. Maybe Noah had guilt later, maybe he didn’t. I don’t know if my parents ever felt badly about the favoritism they showed Steven and Sarah. I don’t know how Lucky could be there for my little boy almost from the beginning, and then walk away. Jake—I know that it would have been hard for Lucky, to watch Jason step in with Jake, but I never had any intention of taking Cam from him. Even now, we’ve told Jake Jason’s his father, but Cam still just calls him Jason. Because he knows who his father is, even though he stopped asking for him.”

“And doesn’t that make you furious? Don’t you want to rip his throat out?”

“It just makes me sad,” she said, and he sighed. “For Cameron, who must be so confused, even though he’s handling it. And for Lucky. His greatest fear, you know, was that he’d end up like his father. That he’d let his family down when it mattered. It’s easier to run, Patrick. To hide. To pretend the problem doesn’t exist. But I can’t let it rule my life. If Lucky comes back, I’ll deal with it. But for now? My boys are safe, they’re healthy, and they’re loved. Your daughter is going to be so loved, she’ll be smothered with it. Our parents teach us so much about family, and who we want to be. They’re the model we’re trying to live up to—or avoid being.”

“Yeah, yeah, I guess that’s true.” He rubbed his face. “I don’t want to be Noah Drake.”

“You won’t be. You couldn’t be. Because you’d never run away when it gets hard. You could have turned down this job. But you come here every day and face it. That’s the kind of dad you’ll be. Someone who shows up and loves so fiercely it takes your breath away.”

Elizabeth touched the patient files, then met his eyes. “You should call Matt. He could take some of these off your hands.”

“I thought you weren’t going to meddle,” he muttered, but there was no heat in his tone.

“I think there’s a window where family gets to be close. A moment where they choose each other. I missed mine with Steven or Sarah, and there’s no guarantee it’ll ever open again. Matt’s a good doctor.” She held the top file out to him. “Give him a chance.”

Coffee House: Office

Carly set her bag on the chair, draped her coat over the back, and then took a deep breath before raising her head to look at Jason. “Mama said she’d talked to you.”

Jason’s mouth tightened and he dropped his gaze to his desk before forcing himself to look back at her. “I was going to call you.” And that was true, he thought, but he hadn’t exactly put it at the top of his list or let himself think about it much. He hadn’t even mentioned it to Elizabeth.

“Well, I’m here, so…” She looked down, plucked at a thread in her coat. “Patrick asked if I wanted some second opinions. You know, how I went all the way around the world trying to find someone, anyone who would tell me he was wrong about Michael. But he wasn’t then. And he’s not now.”

“No, I didn’t think he was.” Jason cleared his throat. “Are you thinking about sending him to Silver Water?”

“Yeah. Yeah, um, I like the idea of him being near Michael. I called, and they said they had a bed open. They’re holding it.” Carly’s fingers dug into the top of the chair. “Have you…I know it’s none of my business, but have you been to see him?”

“No.”

“Right.” She bit her lip. “Morgan’s handling it, but I was thinking maybe I should find someone for him to talk to. Or at least a therapist who can observe him. Make sure I’m not missing anything. It’s been…it’s been a hard year. The boys were close to Emily, too, so that’s…”

Jason exhaled slowly. “I’m sorry. I never meant for you take this on entirely—”

“It’s okay. It is, Jason. You were juggling a thousand things a few weeks ago, and I agreed with you then — your family came first. You couldn’t do anything for Sonny—”

“I could have. Elizabeth was in surgery. Maybe I could have checked in with him or called someone.”

Carly sat down, folded her hands in her lap. “Or Sonny could have learned a lesson from six months ago. He rushed into whatever happened on those docks. You said it was self-defense. Sonny went after Johnny out in the open. He was never like that before we lost Michael. He was out of control, and everything that happened after Kate was shot told us that. Maybe he was having an episode. I don’t know. But what I do know is none of this is your fault. Elizabeth nearly died. Sonny could have waited. He could have been sitting in the waiting room with you, waiting for word. That’s what a friend would have done.” Her voice faltered. “I should have done that.”

“Carly—”

She shook her head. “Don’t make excuses for me. We both know that I have to work twice as hard to be a good person. It doesn’t come naturally for me. It never has. Sometimes I stumble into it, and that’s great, but mostly someone has to point it out. I don’t want to be someone you take care of, Jason.” Carly exhaled in a quick breath. “And I didn’t come here to be a weepy mess. I figured you’d be okay with Silver Water. I’m going to make the arrangements and talk to Kate. She, um, got out of the hospital last week. I figure she should be in the loop since if not for a few minutes and a crazy shooter, this would be her decision.”

“I think that’s a good idea. Let me know if there’s anything you need from me.” Jason got to his feet, intending to walk her out but Carly remained still. “Was there something else?”

“I ask every time I go if you’ve been there.” Her eyes searched his, and he dropped his gaze first.  “Promise me, Jason. You’ll go to see him before we move him.”

“I—” He glanced away, then nodded. “Yeah. I’ll go.”

“Okay. I’ll call you later.”

Crimson Offices: Lobby

 Kate removed her sunglasses, stowed them in her purse and held it out to a beaming Maxie who snatched it, delighted to have Kate back.

“I can’t believe you’re already coming back to work,” Olivia complained following Kate into her office. “You just got out of the hospital—”

“I’ve recovered almost completely, Olivia.” Kate was relieved to see her desk was mostly clear. Maxie bustled in, heading to the cappuccino maker in the corner. It was lovely to be back in her element, to have her assistant who knew exactly how to look after her.

“But—”

“I appreciate you staying, that you came to the wedding at all,” Kate continued. She sat at her desk, holding out her hand to accept the drink Maxie brought her. “But I think we’ve learned that we do much better with some distance between us.”

“Distance,” Olivia repeated. She folded her arms. “You mean me back in Bensonhurst where I can’t remind you of where you came from—”

“I used to be ashamed of it.” Kate tipped her head. “Strange, isn’t it? The thought that someone would learn that I was born in Brooklyn and hadn’t spent my youth summering in Martha’s Vineyard. As if that was all that mattered in the world.” She sighed. “I’m not ashamed of who I was, Olivia, but that’s not who I am anymore. And I’m not sure you’re interested in Kate Howard. You proved that while I was in the hospital. When given the opportunity to put me first, you chose petty revenge.”

“Do you really think that’s why I did it?” Olivia planted a hand at her hip. “Do you really think that I give a damn about what happened twenty years ago?”

“Twenty-five. You’d think that it would be easy for you to remember that, all things considered—”

Olivia’s eyes darted over to Maxie, doing her best to fade into the curtains. She looked back at her cousin. “We don’t need to talk about any of that—”

“What’s the harm in doing it now? What can it possibly matter? Sonny’s not here to get angry at me for keeping the secret, at you for lying—”

Olivia folded her arms. “You think I give a damn about any of that? You promised you wouldn’t say a thing—”

“Back then, it was personal.” Kate’s lips flirted with a smile. She flexed her manicured hands. “I wanted him, so I took him. And I didn’t want him to have any ties to you. We both know what he would have done if you’d told him.”

“I wasn’t tying my life to a thug. You think what’s happened is a tragedy, but whoever put that bullet in you did you a favor, whoever put a bullet in him did a favor for the world—”

Kate’s expression went pale. “Get out. Now. And don’t ever come back.”

“With pleasure,” Olivia spat. She slammed the door behind her, and Kate took a breath, pressed a hand to her midsection, gathering herself.

Then she looked at Maxie who had remained as still as a statue, a notepad in her hands. “Family can be very difficult. Particularly when the history is filled with nothing but bad memories. I apologize for that scene.”

“Nothing to apologize for.” Maxie folded her arms. “Maybe Olivia really believes someone did you a favor, but they’re also why Lulu is gone, and she knows that. She just doesn’t care. So goodbye and good riddance.”

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Elizabeth lifted the lid on a toy box, dropped the bundle she was holding into it, then looked at Jake. “This doesn’t open for at least an hour. Play with the toys that you already have.”

Jake considered the truck at his feet, screwing his tiny face up with thought. “Want fire.”

“Does it have to—”

“Fire,” Jake repeated, stomping his foot.

“Fine, fine. I’ll get the fire engine.” Elizabeth dug down to the bottom, retrieved the fire engine. “How about this one?”

Jake beamed at her. She set it on the floor in front of him. “Okay, go forth and annoy the world.” She winced when she heard the siren wailing as Jake rolled it towards the door. “Should have broken that thing when I had the chance.”

The front door opened, and Jason stepped in, frowning at the sound.

“Sorry, I tried to get him to play with the quiet dump truck—” She picked her way towards him—she’d only cleaned up about half the toys Jake had dragged out all morning. His favorite way to spend the day was emptying his toybox so he could see all his toys at once. “But he likes loud noise. I was hoping he’d inherit your love for quiet—” She raised her voice slightly to be heard over the clamor.

“No, I guess he got your love of chaos.” Jason dipped his head, kissed her. She sighed, leaned against him for a moment, enjoying it. She wouldn’t take her health for granted again, she thought.

“Yeah, well, between Jake liking things that make noise and Cameron’s need for speed, I’m a little scared.” She gestured towards the kitchen. “We can talk in there—the noise isn’t so bad when you’re not in the same room.” He followed her towards the back of the penthouse, and true enough, the fire alarm dulled a bit with the distance. “You sure you want to keep him at home?” she asked, pulling out ingredients for Jake’s usual sandwich lunch.

“I can handle it,” Jason said, but he was smiling when he sat at the table. “Did Epiphany put you back on the schedule?”

“Yeah. I’m hoping to get to the surgical floor. I like the hours better there, but we’re short-staffed in so many places.” She cut Jake’s sandwich in diagonal slices. “I thought you said you’d be at the coffee house until later. Plans change?”

“Yeah.” Jason leaned back in the chair, looked at the surface of the table. “Carly came by. It’s, uh, time to talk about long-term care. For Sonny.”

Elizabeth’s fingers stilled in the process of setting carrot pieces next to Jake’s sandwich. She went to him, and he pulled her down to sit on his knee. “What do you need?” she asked softly, touching his face, stroking his hair back. “What can I do?”

“Nothing. There’s…” He sighed, leaned his head against her chest. She kept combing through his hair. “He’ll go to Silver Water. Like Michael.”

She said nothing, knowing he wasn’t finished. He spoke again, “She wants me to go see him. Before.”

“Because you haven’t until now.” Because he couldn’t, she knew that. Couldn’t face it. Until he sat in the room next to Sonny’s still body, next to a shell of the man who had played such a pivotal role in Jason’s life—part of Jason could pretend it wasn’t happening. “Gram is still here. Let’s take advantage of that. After the boys are in bed, we’ll take the bike. We’ll make it go away for a little while.”

“I don’t know if that’ll work, but—” Jason tipped his face back so that their eyes met. “Yeah. Okay.”

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