I can’t really tell you
What I’m gonna do
There are so many thoughts in my head
There are two roads to walk down
And one road to choose
So I’m thinking over
The things that you’ve said
– Thinking Over, Dana Glover

---

Monday, May 6, 2002

Corinthos Penthouse: Living Room

Nico leaned back on the sofa, sipping his bourbon. “I know it goes against tradition,” he told Sonny as the other man lounged in the arm chair. “But I figured if I set Smith up in Miami, he’d be more likely to get out of town and stay out of trouble.”

Sonny nodded and glanced at Benny. “You talk to Hector?”

“I did,” Benny said with a nod. “It checks out.”

Nico hissed, sitting up. “You think I was lying?”

Sonny shrugged. “You were pushing Zander pretty hard, and you were angry when I shut down his promotion.”

“Angry at the little shit,” Nico bit out. “He ruined everything. Now I gotta groom another bastard to take over. I don’t belong here, Sonny. I belong in Vegas. I belong in the big-time.” And if Sonny didn’t trust him, damn it, how was he going to get out from under him?

“I’m sure that’s true,” Sonny said evenly. He set the tumbler of bourbon on the coffee table and took a cigar from his pocket, offering it to Nico, who shook his head. “You never made a grab for this job, though. I wonder.”

“I want the money,” Nico retorted. “Not the power. I can make all the money I want in Vegas. Casinos are a cleaner way to make money, and I can run more bookies out of them—” He shook his head. “You get shot at too much.”

“He’s not wrong, Boss,” Benny said with a half-smile.

“I told Smith to stay away from Morgan’s property,” Nico said. “I told him to stop fucking with Morgan. But the kid is a hothead. I didn’t know how much he hated Morgan. Probably for the best that Morgan’s home, so I could see what a little bastard the shit turned out to be. Saved me from making a huge mistake.”

Fuck that, he’d been counting on Zander’s temper to get him killed when the bad numbers were caught. He’d had the perfect fall guy, but the very thing that had made him so right for the job had made him a catastrophe waiting to happen. Damn that bitch Carly for driving off a cliff and forcing Jason home.

“It’s not personal, Nico,” Sonny said. “The kind of power you were pushing at him—” He sighed. “I mean, maybe I should have made it clear when you came on board that I kept Zander working for me because I wanted him where I could see him, but I never had any intention of moving him up. He’s only loyal to himself.”

And that’s what made Sonny soft. Thinking anyone had more loyalty to Corinthos than they had to himself. Nico would wager even Jason Morgan had his limits when it came to blind obedience. Not that anyone had discovered that particular off switch—even Corinthos fucking Jason’s woman years ago hadn’t been more than a blip.

But Sonny was living in the stone age. No one valued the organization above themselves. Not anymore. And Nico was ready for a change.

He’d play along as long as Sonny needed him to, but once he was in Vegas, he’d make his move and be free of the bastard for good.

Alexis’s Office

“Thanks for meeting with me,” Jason said as he took a seat across from Alexis the following afternoon. “I know I didn’t have an appointment—”

Alexis held up her hand to stall him. “Hey. I’m on retainer.” She cleared her throat. “I actually expected to hear from you sooner. After I found out about Edward and his visits.”

Jason hesitated, tilting his head. “Who told—” He sighed. “Ned.”

“Yeah. He mentioned it. AJ stormed over a few days ago, angry at Edward. Lila talked them both down, but I can imagine how angry you are. Ned called to give me a heads up.” She tapped a pencil against her desk. “You have a pretty solid case against the school, and you might convince a court that Edward isn’t good for—”

“I don’t want to go to court,” Jason cut in. He swallowed, knowing he was breaking every promise he’d ever made to Carly.

But she was gone now, and he had to deal with the situation as it stood now.

“I know my chances would be slim, and I don’t want to drag Michael through something when I don’t—” He paused again. “When I don’t even believe in what I’m fighting for.”

He looked past her, at the window that held a view of downtown Port Charles. “You know, in the beginning…I lied because the Quartermaines would have taken Michael from Carly. They had the clout, the power. She was nobody to them. And I didn’t—no, I know AJ would have let them control Michael’s life. To prove himself, to get their acceptance.”

He didn’t remember being Jason Quartermaine, but something in AJ’s words about their shared childhood had rang true. And he’d seen the pressure they exerted first hand.

“I don’t want to go to court,” Jason repeated. “But I don’t want AJ to have sole custody. Not yet, anyway. I’m not sure—I’m not convinced—” He dipped his head.

“There are things we can offer,” Alexis said. “We can suggest visitation at first, so Michael can adjust. He doesn’t remember the year he spent with AJ, I imagine. But he knows Courtney, which should help.”

Jason rubbed the back of his neck. “Can we…. try supervised at first? I mean, it doesn’t have to be me. I trust Bobbie, Elizabeth, or I guess, Courtney. I don’t know her well, but Elizabeth does—”

“We can ask. I’m sure it’ll help Michael become more comfortable with AJ.” She was quiet for a moment. “I know how difficult this is for you, with Carly just…with everything happening so suddenly. It’s been less than a month since she died. Everything’s changing so fast.”

“I just want to do what’s best for Michael,” Jason said firmly. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted. Dragging him into court—that’s not best. I could…I mean, hypothetically,” he said when he saw Alexis’s brows lift. “I could talk to people. Give some money. But one day, Michael—” He shook his head. “Michael will grow up, and I’d have to answer for it.”

“I’ll draft an agreement. I don’t know who AJ is using for representation, but I’ll ask Ned if he knows.” Alexis leaned forward. “When that day comes, Jason, you won’t have anything to be ashamed of.”

Kelly’s: Dining Room

“He’s meeting with Alexis today?” Courtney asked, dumping the remnants from a table into her tub of dirty dishes. It was finally closing time and she just wanted to finish this shift, go home, and soak her aching feet in a hot bath.

“Isn’t that, like, the opposite of keeping things out of court?” Gia interrupted before Elizabeth could open her mouth. “Why involve lawyers at all?”

“Gia, don’t help,” Elizabeth retorted as she tossed aside a pile of receipts and frowned at the ledgers. “Son of a bitch.”

“I imagine he’s talking to Alexis about drawing up a legal agreement that protects them all. It’s an out of court settlement.” Courtney shrugged. “I doubt AJ will care as long as it gets him Michael.” And then what?

“Jason didn’t really say anything about the specifics…” Elizabeth trailed off, muttering under her breath. She flipped back to the preceding page. “God damn it.”

“You know,” Gia said, ignoring their friend who had surely forgot to carry a number in the ledger and would spend fifteen minutes swearing at the inanimate objects, “she didn’t come home last night.”

“Really?” Courtney moved through the archway into the kitchen and dumping the dishes into the sink. She wrinkled her nose. “Hey, why did we decide to let the kitchen staff go early?”

“Because I’m going to do the dishes,” Elizabeth called back to her. “Jason isn’t picking me up for another hour, and…” She sighed.

Courtney emerged from the kitchen in time to see the brunette slam the books shut. “Hey, now that you’re sleeping with him, maybe he should take over the books.”

“I can do this,” Elizabeth insisted. “I’m majoring in business, so I can take care of this place better. I just…” She huffed. “I don’t know how we go through so damn many cartons of eggs—”

“I need to get more exciting friends,” Gia decided. “We should be out a club, but nope. We’re balancing books in a greasy diner.” She sighed. “I was fun once.”

“And a blackmailer, but let’s not quibble,” Elizabeth mused as she dug through the invoices, probably looking for the receipt for the stupid eggs.

“Fair point.” Gia propped her chin up on her hands across the table from Elizabeth. “So was the sex good?”

Courtney snickered as she dumped the last bit of coffee into the sink and put the carafes into another tub. “She was twenty minutes late for her shift this afternoon.”

“I had to go home and get clothes,” Elizabeth said with a delicate sniff. “I don’t kiss and tell.”

“Ha, that’s because there was nothing to kiss and tell about,” Gia said with a snort. “Before, no one gave a damn about your sad sex life.  It was nonexistent. Now…” She wiggled her eyebrows. “He has long fingers, you know.”

“I hate you all so much,” Elizabeth muttered.

“It was probably really bad,” Courtney said in a mock whisper. “You know, high expectations—she was probably rusty—”

“That’s not going to work,” Elizabeth replied. “You’re not going to break me.”

“He looks like he’d know what do with those hands,” Gia sighed. She perked up. “The sex is good with AJ, isn’t it?”

Courtney just raised her eyebrows. “What, you think because they’re brothers there’s some of relation there?”

“Why not—”

“Did Lucky and Nikolas have anything in common?” Courtney challenged slyly. Take that.

Gia frowned, closing her mouth and then looking at Elizabeth who looked back at her. “Huh. Never thought about it.” She pursed her lips. “I’ll tell you…he wasn’t very generous, if you know what I mean. Not much build up, and you know, if he was done first…” She lifted a shoulder. “He’d just roll over and go to sleep.”

Elizabeth opened her mouth, and then bit her lip. “I don’t think we should—”

“Oh, by all means, Elizabeth,” came a drawling and mocking voice from the staircase. The three women looked over to find Lucky standing at the foot, one arm braced against the railing. “Tell them how I stack up against your new fuck buddy.”

“Oh, here we go.” Gia rolled her eyes. “Look, pal—”

But Elizabeth held up her hand to cut off her friend. Courtney glanced between Lucky and Elizabeth, uncertainly. She had seen the blowout arguments after the wedding had been called off—Nikolas had had to physically restrain Lucky from going after Elizabeth the day she’d moved out.

Not that anyone thought Lucky would hurt Elizabeth, but he’d been so angry…

“What happened between us,” Elizabeth said coolly, “is no one’s business. Like my life now is no one’s business.” She sent Gia a hot look. “Right?”

“Right. I’m sure Lucky is a dynamo in the sack.”

Elizabeth rose to her feet. “I don’t appreciate you eavesdropping, Lucky. There’s a private entrance to the rooms upstairs after hours. You’re not supposed to use the restaurant or come here after closing.”

“You only have this job because of me!” Lucky shot back as he released the railing and strode into the dining room proper. “Don’t forget that my aunt gave you this job because she felt sorry for you.”

“Hey, let’s just finish closing,” Courtney said with a weak smile. “We’re all tired, I’m sure Lucky had a long day—”

“No one asked you,” Lucky retorted, with searing glance in her direction. “You’re just Elizabeth’s latest project. Take it from someone who knows—she’ll move on to someone more pathetic.”

“Is that what this is about?” Elizabeth demanded. “You’re mad because I moved on—”

“You know what this is about,” Lucky retorted. He took another step towards her, and the anger in his eyes had Courtney slipping her cell phone from her apron and opening it to AJ’s contact information. Just in case.

“I really don’t. We’ve been over for months.” Elizabeth crossed her arms. “And you damn well know we’ve been over for longer than that. You’re just pissed because I walked away first.”

“Actually,” Gia drawled, “it sounds like Sparky is pissed because you took so long to walk away.” She walked towards Lucky, putting herself in between him and Elizabeth. “Seems like he’s finally woken up to what we’ve all known for ages. You stayed with him out of pity—”

“Gia, that’s not what happened—”

“Gia,” Courtney protested. While she loved Gia, the woman had a penchant for stirring up trouble just to see what would happen. “Come on—”

“No, that’s exactly what happened.” Lucky eyed Gia with a mixture of relief and bitterness. “She saw it. My brother did. My parents. Aunt Bobbie. Everyone but me. You were fucking Jason back then—”

“I wasn’t—”

“You wanted to,” Lucky cut in.

And Elizabeth closed her mouth at that, her cheeks flushing.  “That’s not how it happened, Lucky—”

“And now you’re shoving him in my face again—”

“No different from you screwing her sister,” Gia said calmly, causing all eyes in the room to look at her. “You think I haven’t seen you two here? Around town? You’re sleeping with her sister and still giving Elizabeth grief. She did you a favor, Jackass, by walking out of that wedding. You’re just too dumb to admit it.”

Lucky scowled. “Whatever. You can all go to hell.” He brushed past Gia and stormed into the courtyard. Gia walked over and firmly locked the door behind him.

“You didn’t have to make it worse,” Elizabeth said, but her words were weak. She sat down. “He’s right to be angry. I’m still angry at the mess I made—”

“Hey, no one forced him to stay.” Gia looked at Courtney with her brow raised. “You can put your phone away.”

Courtney flushed. “I just…AJ’s finishing up his shift, you know? He was only a few minutes away. I thought…if it was like that day you moved out, Elizabeth—”

“I appreciate it.” Elizabeth bit her lip. “I guess I should be grateful it doesn’t happen more with me working here and him upstairs.”

Courtney shoved her phone in her apron pocket and rounded the table. “All the same, I think—maybe we should stay here until Jason picks you up.”

“Lucky isn’t going to hit me.” Elizabeth reached for her invoices. “That’s not who he is. He’s just…he’s angry at how his life turned out.”

“And he’s too weak to do anything to change it.” Gia lifted his chin. “I don’t blame him for being pissed. I was pissed when I realized what Nikolas was going to do to you. What he would let his brother do. You were pissed when you figured it out. But we didn’t sit around waiting for someone to change it. We got gone. It’s his own damn fault he’s wallowing in his own misery. He wants someone to blame, Elizabeth. Stop letting it be you.”

“I’m not innocent in all of this,” Elizabeth insisted.

“Last year, no. You were cruel to stay with him when your heart wasn’t in it,” Gia said coldly. Courtney gasped, but the other woman continued. “And you knew it, too. You knew it was different, but you lied to him and yourself—”

“Gia—”

“And the sooner you forgive yourself, the sooner you’ll stop letting him walk all over you when he takes his bullshit out on you. You were wrong last year,” Gia stressed, “but you made it right. Maybe it was later than it should have been, but you got yourself together and out of that mess. He’s just pissed because he didn’t do it first.”

“You don’t have to be so mean,” Courtney protested, but Elizabeth held up a hand.

“No, this is—” She took a deep breath. “This is exactly why we’re friends now. It’s nothing less than what she told me at New Year’s, Courtney. I knew it was true then, but I didn’t want it to be. I need someone who won’t lie to me. Even if it sounds harsh.”

“You worked hard for this new life,” Gia said, sympathy replacing the anger. “You deserve this chance with Jason. But it’s never gonna work if you can’t let go of what happened before.”

“I’m working on it. I promise.”

Kelly’s: Courtyard

Jason stepped into the courtyard and paused when he saw AJ leaned against the doorway, a cigarette in his hand. He lifted his brow. “When did you start to smoke?”

AJ offered a half-smile. “When I needed a way to deal with stress. This—” He held up the cigarette. “It might cause cancer, but it’s a hell of a lot less dangerous than alcohol.”

Jason nodded and started towards the double doors but paused when he caught a glimpse of the women inside. Some sort of music was filtering out, and he could see Elizabeth and Courtney dancing and singing to each other while Courtney filled the sugar canisters at the counter and Elizabeth mopped. Gia was nursing some sort of drink at the counter, a grin stretched across her lips.

“I thought they’d be done by now,” Jason said after a moment.

“They do this sometimes,” AJ replied. He flicked his ashes at the ground. “Listen. Courtney told me that she and Elizabeth—that they were fighting about all of this. I don’t…” He looked away and shifted, standing straight up. “I want my son. I want a chance to do right by him, but Courtney’s my wife. And her happiness matters, too. Elizabeth—their friendship matters—”

“I know.” Jason exhaled slowly. “And I know how much Courtney matters to Elizabeth. I don’t want either of them in the middle.”

“I wanted to keep the peace,” AJ admitted. “I thought if I asked Courtney to talk to Elizabeth—it would keep us all from arguing, but I was wrong.” He met Jason’s eyes. “It’s tempting to let someone do the dirty work. To take the risks. It’s a weakness to avoid confrontation, and I’m working on it.”

He didn’t want to respect AJ Quartermaine. He wanted to remember all the horrible things AJ had done, but at the moment, Jason couldn’t seem to make any of them worse than what Jason had done. Or what Sonny had done. Or Carly. No one was innocent.

He approached the window a bit closer and watched Elizabeth with her friends for a moment. She might want to think she was damaged from everything had happened over the last few years, but the way she danced and laughed with Courtney and Gia—she was so happy in there. With those women. With her friends.

He didn’t want to be the reason Elizabeth was unhappy.

“I don’t want to argue with you,” Jason said, finally. “I know what my chances are in court. I know if I dragged Michael through it all, I’d probably lose. I know that.” He turned and faced his brother. “That doesn’t change the reason I would do it.”

“To protect him.” AJ nodded. “Yeah. I know. And I wish to God I could give you guarantees, but I’d be lying. I’d be making promises I don’t know if I could keep. I can’t promise to never take another drink. I’m always gonna be an alcoholic.”

He dropped the butt of his cigarette and ground it with the heel of his work boot. “And I won’t lie and say that sometimes I miss it—the way everything falls away, the way my problems disappear. Living like that—in a constant haze—” He swallowed hard. “It makes some things easier. I don’t have to care about how much I disappoint people.”

“Listen—” Jason shifted, uncomfortable with how direct the older man was being, how vulnerable he was making himself.

“I have to be honest about why I drank the way I did,” AJ said, holding up a hand. “Because if I don’t recognize the triggers, I’ll never be able to avoid them. Some people drink just to make their problems go away for a few hours. Alcoholics drink to keep them away. But they never leave. I don’t want to ruin Michael’s life the way I nearly ruined mine.”

“Look.” And because if nothing else, Jason respected honesty, he said, “I believe you. I’ve seen you since I’ve been home. And I trust Elizabeth. I’ve met your wife. I know you’re trying. I know you’re sober. You don’t have to keep—” He shrugged. “You don’t have to keep telling me this, okay? It’s not just—I made Carly a promise,” he admitted. “She was selfish to ask for it, and I was wrong to do it, but I promised her—”

“Yeah. Well…” AJ rubbed the back of his neck. “She’s not here anymore. I wish she was. I never wanted her out of the picture. I just…I wanted to be in it.”

The door opened then, and the music poured a bit more clearly as a flushed and slightly apprehensive Courtney stood in the door way. “Um. Hey. We—we just noticed you.” Her blue eyes flicked back and forth between them. “So, um, what’s up?”

“Everything is fine,” AJ said leaning over to kiss wife’s cheek. “Jason and I were just enjoying the show.”

“Oh.” Her flush deepened. “Um. You—” She pursed her lips and whacked his shoulder. “You’re kind of a jackass sometimes.” She looked back inside. “Hey, are we done?”

“You are,” Gia said as she joined Courtney at the door. She handed the blonde her purse, her own under her arm. She eyed Jason for a long moment, a cool look in her eyes. “I know we don’t have to talk about what I’ll do to you if you mess with her. I’ll break you into little pieces.”

Jason merely raised an eyebrow at this threat, but said nothing. While Elizabeth seemed to like Gia now, he was still reserving judgment. He remembered the other woman as an opportunist and wasn’t entirely convinced by the turnaround.

Gia followed AJ and Courtney out of the courtyard while Jason went into the diner to find Elizabeth sighing over ledgers and invoices as she packed them away in her bag. “You use a calculator, don’t you?”

“I do,” Elizabeth said with a scowl as she shoved the last folder of invoices in the bag. “Which is why I can’t understand why I screw it up so much.” She wiggled her shoulders and leaned up to kiss him. “I thought you’d never get here.”

“I got hung up at the warehouse.” He cupped her jaw in his hands and kissed her again, slowly this time. “What’s wrong?”

Elizabeth sighed and rested her forehead against his chest after he’d let his hands fall down to her shoulders. “You know, I used to think it was great how well you knew my moods. Now it’s a pain in the ass.”

“You don’t have to tell me—”

“No, I just—” She glanced at the stairs. “Can we just go? I want to get out of here.”

“Okay.” Jason reached for the tote bag with the ledgers. “You want to go to Jake’s?”

They paused at the threshold of the diner as Elizabeth turned off the lights and locked the doors. “Eventually, but can we go for a ride first?” She looked at him. “I don’t want to think about anything for a little while.”

Vista Point

Elizabeth sat on the bench overlooking the harbor and eyed Jason for a long moment, wondering if she should tell him about the fight with Lucky earlier.

She hated that Lucky was still a factor in her life—she didn’t want him to be a part of this new experience—this step she’d taken with Jason.

But while she didn’t think Lucky would actually hurt her, she had been relieved Courtney and Gia had hung around as long as they did, and that Courtney had asked AJ to come pick her up in case Jason was late.

“I think I’ve made it clear that the wedding—” Elizabeth bit her lip and looked down at her fingers. “When Lucky and I broke up, it was bad. Really bad.” She peeked up at him.

Jason had turned away from the guard rail, leaning against it, but he remained quiet.

She sighed and continued. “I’m not sure—I think maybe he thought he could convince me to forgive him, to go back. I guess he had reason to think that—I mean, I always had before.” She bit her lip. “But I was done this time. I’m angry at myself for letting it continue so long, you know? I mean, I knew…”

Elizabeth shoved herself to her feet. “I knew what you said last year was true, but I wasn’t—I don’t know. I couldn’t face it. I didn’t think I was strong enough to be alone. But I was standing there that day, staring at myself in the mirror, in this wedding dress, and I knew—I knew even before Gia came in to tell me the truth—I knew I couldn’t do it.”

“Okay,” Jason said when she was quiet for a moment. “So, what happened after you walked out? Sonny—he just told me the wedding was called off. He never said—”

“I knew if I was going to make it stick, if I was going to respect myself, I had to make a clean break,” Elizabeth continued. “Gia was so angry at Nikolas and they were already on the rocks because of the stupid plan—” She shook her head. “Bobbie was pissed, too. At Luke and Laura because they wanted me to change my mind. They thought—this latest brainwashing—that I could fix it. That I was the key to bringing their son back to him, and I was…I was just staying with her at first, and Bobbie eventually had to throw them both out of the house. She stood up for me.” Elizabeth closed her eyes. “And I know it cost her.  But she told me I had to do what was right for me and to hell with everyone else.”

She folded her arms across her chest and joined him at the rail, looking towards the water. “So, Gia and I decided to rent the other apartment, and Taggert said he’d make sure to keep Lucky out.” She saw Jason scowl slightly next to her and managed a weak smile. “Taggert was pissed about what we’d put Gia through, but you know, he’s always had a soft spot for me. I hate the way he treats you, but—”

“Yeah, I get it.” Jason shook his head. “Did Taggert need to keep Lucky out?”

“When I moved my stuff from Kelly’s—” She closed her eyes, remembering that. “We were in the hallway, and I had my bag with me. Nikolas was there—he was trying to talk to Gia, to me. She’d given him back the ring, and I’d given him mine to give to Lucky—when Lucky showed up. And he just…he lost it when he saw me with my stuff. Without the ring.”

A muscle ticked in Jason’s cheek. “Did he—”

“He didn’t. I don’t know if he would have. Once, I would have said he’d have thrown himself off a cliff before hurting me or any other woman. Before. You knew him then.”

“Elizabeth—”

“I think one of the hardest things I’ve had to accept these last few months is that…that Lucky…my Lucky…” Her eyes burned, but she held the tears back. She’d shed too many tears for Lucky Spencer. “He died that night, and he never came back. I wasn’t in love with the man who returned, and he wasn’t in love with the woman I grew up to be. And we hurt the hell of out of each other pretending otherwise. The man he is today? I don’t recognize him. And that man…” She bit her lip. “He might be capable of hurting me.”

She cleared her throat. “Anyway. After that day, he came to the Brownstone a few times early on, but Taggert and Bobbie kept him away from me, and he started to avoid Kelly’s altogether once I took over managing it in February.”

“Okay,” Jason said slowly. “Then what changed tonight?”

“He came down after closing. He’s not supposed to—Bobbie made it clear to the tenants that they should use the private entrance as often as possible, but well…Lucky thinks he’s exempt.” She sighed again, sick and tired of thinking about Lucky.  “He found out we’re…” Elizabeth glanced up at him. “That we’re seeing each other. And he’s angry at me. He’s angry because I moved on, and especially that I moved on with you. Gia thinks he’s more pissed at himself for not walking away first, at me for taking so long, for staying with him when I didn’t love him. It’s all bad, and it just…. I can put it out my head most of the time, but every once in a while…” She lifted a shoulder. “It sneaks back up on me.”

“Elizabeth—”

“It’s not just the fight with Lucky,” Elizabeth cut him off. “Yeah, it worries me that he’s still angry. Because I don’t know what he’ll do. But it’s me. I haven’t…I haven’t really forgiven myself for what happened. For what I did to him—”

“You didn’t—”

“I did,” She interrupted again. “I stayed with him when I knew I didn’t love him. And I did it out of obligation. God, Jason—” She closed her eyes. “Last spring, I wanted to go with you. I wanted to run after you. I nearly did. And I thought about finding you a thousand times, begging you to forgive me—”

“Hey—”

“And every time I did that—every time I wished I were anywhere else with, with you—and I stayed with Lucky—I was lying to him. To myself. And it was wrong. And it was weak.”

“Okay.” Jason nodded after a moment. “Okay, yeah, I get that.” He tilted his head. “But you’re done with that.”

“I am. But I don’t trust myself all the time,” she admitted. “When I came to your room last night—I was going to walk away. Because it would be easier to do that than to take a chance on myself again.”

He reached for her hand and took it in his, letting his thumb rest in her palm. “But you didn’t.”

“Because I’m tired of taking the easy out,” Elizabeth said, raising her eyes to his. “Every time I kept my mouth shut and didn’t tell you how I felt. Every time you nearly kissed me, and I didn’t let you—even though it was the only thing I could think about. When I let you walk away last year. When I tried to push you away when you came home. I’ve spent most of my life being afraid. Letting fear rule my life—” She shook her head. “I’m not going to do that anymore. I can’t. I have to—” She swallowed hard. “But I’m not sure I know how to stop. I might still—I might still do it. Sometimes. I wasn’t going to tell you about the fight with Lucky.”

“Because you don’t want to talk about Lucky anymore,” Jason said. “Because of everything that happened before—” He touched her chin. “He was a part of your life, Elizabeth. Good, bad—he helped shape who you are. Like Robin and Carly did for me. You never have to worry about that. Not with me.”

She felt the coolness of a tear as it slid down her cheek. His thumb caught the second one. “Jason—”

“You never—ever—” he stressed, “have to hide from me. I want you just the way you are.”

She kissed him then, this miracle of a man who had seen the worst of her, had been the victim of her cowardice and selfishness—and had still stood by her.

And for the first time in years—she began to believe she deserved the happiness she felt right now.

Their mingled breath was shallow as she drew back, letting herself slide back down his body and rest on her feet. “Let’s go,” she murmured, kissing him again. “I want to be with you. I want to feel your hands on me. “

His hands slid down from her hair, framing her jaw, his eyes—she could drown in them— “Elizabeth—”

“What did you say last night?” she asked, warmth spreading all over, her lips curling into a smile. “I think we’ve talked enough.”

I’m in a daze stumbling bewildered
North of gravity head up in the stratosphere
You and I roller coaster riding love
You’re the center of adrenaline
And I’m beginning to understand
– The Best Thing, Savage Garden

---

Sunday, May 5, 2002

Kelly’s: Dining Room

Courtney winced when Elizabeth stalked in from the kitchen and snatched the white apron from behind the counter. “I guess Jason found you,” she murmured as she gently set the carafe of coffee back on the hot plate. “Elizabeth—”

“I told him,” her friend snapped. “And of course, it’s all my fault. What am I supposed to do? Ignore the situation? Maybe I could run away for a year and just pretend everything is exactly the same when I come back—” She stopped and closed her eyes. “Jason,” she continued without opening them, “isn’t thrilled that I don’t plan to sandbag AJ’s character on the stand if I’m asked.”

“Oh.” Courtney bit her lip. “I mean…” She looked at the counter, focusing on a small crack in the laminate surface. “I’m sorry—”

“Why?” Elizabeth asked. “None of this is your fault. You married AJ, Courtney. You get to take his side, particularly when, you know, he’s not wrong.” She hissed through her teeth as she yanked out the ledger and reached the receipts from the lunch rush. “Michael is his son. AJ’s not wrong to do whatever he thinks is best.”

“But Jason isn’t wrong to be concerned,” Courtney said. “I’d be lying if I said I were one hundred percent convinced AJ will never take another drink.” And God, didn’t she feel disloyal admitting that? But this was Elizabeth. The first friend she’d made in Port Charles. Her best friend.

“I guess I just…” Elizabeth closed her eyes. “I don’t know. I thought—I thought if I took that step forward. If I…let myself feel those things for Jason again—”

“Or admitted that you already did.”

“Semantics.” But Elizabeth smiled, a slight shift in the curve of her lips. “I thought if I took that leap—he’d be there waiting. That…it was me holding us back.”

“But—”

“It’s not. It’s him, too.” She waited a moment. “He doesn’t trust me. Not where it counts. He can’t see that I love Michael, that I want what’s best for him—”

“I think he’s scared—” Courtney lowered her voice when a customer wandered in. “Elizabeth, you’ve said it yourself. He still loves that little boy like his own son. That doesn’t go away. You never stop protecting your children. Maybe the reason Jason is so angry is because he knows you’re right, and he doesn’t want to admit—”

“What am I supposed to do with that?” Elizabeth cut in. “I spent two years of my life running after Lucky, fixing his problems—” she shook her head. “No, this—this is a sign. It’s not enough to care about Jason. It’s not enough that he cares about me. We don’t work. When the rest of the world gets involved—”

“And that is a cop out,” Courtney interrupted, slapping her hand over the ledger, forcing Elizabeth to stop writing, to look at her. “What would Gia say if she were here?”

“Oh, God…” Elizabeth rolled her eyes and sighed. “Courtney—”

“This situation with Michael? Where you’re in the middle? This doesn’t go away if you stop…if you pull away from Jason again. What changes, Elizabeth? Nothing.”

Elizabeth exhaled slowly. “Courtney—”

“But maybe that’s not the point. Because if you walk away from what you feel this time, if Jason lets you—” Courtney shrugged, stepped back, and let her hand fall back to her side. “Maybe that’s for the best. Because if you let something that has nothing to do with who the two of you are together—if you let something that’s not even about you get in your way—maybe you were right. Maybe it’s just lust. Residual. Unfinished business.”

“That’s not fair,” her friend managed, her voice weak, even a bit shaky. “He doesn’t trust me—”

“You don’t know that.” Courtney took a deep breath. “I love you. I don’t know Jason that well, but I do see the way he looks at you. I think, before you write this off, before you let fear get inside your head—you owe it to both of you to give it a chance.” She hesitated, but decided to press her advantage. “You both love Michael. AJ loves Michael. I want the chance to love him. We are all good people, Elizabeth. Good people should be able to find a way to make this right.”

Quartermaine Mansion: Family Room

AJ scowled at the sight of his grandfather standing by the fireplace. “Grandmother—” he cast disapproving eyes at Lila, who sat serenely in her wheelchair. “I should have known—”

“Your grandfather has something he would like to say to you,” Lila said simply. “But I will stay right here to ensure that he doesn’t try anything.”

“Lila,” Edward said, a hand over his heart. “After all these years—”

“Stuff it, darling.” Lila arched an eyebrow, still managing to rule the room even in her weakened state. Her husband scowled, but then turned his attention to AJ, who was no less annoyed but unable to say no to Lila.

“Well?” AJ prompted when Edward remained silent. He folded his arms. “I’m waiting.”

Edward scowled. “Boy—”

“Goodbye,” AJ said, turning back to the door.

“I’m sorry,” Edward bit out. “I was…I was impetuous.”

“Impetuous,” AJ echoed with a scoff. “Let me remind you that you convinced Michael’s headmaster to allow you to meet with him. The fact that you were allowed contact with him on school grounds—Let’s set that aside.” He lowered his voice, his blood still running hot at the very thought of what Edward had done.

“You told my son—a five-year-old child—that his grandmother saw him as a burden. That he was going to come live here soon—a house he doesn’t know full of people he doesn’t know—”

“It was wrong, I know.” Edward huffed. “And if Elizabeth Webber didn’t have an ounce of sympathy for me, a judge is going to have even less. Everyone knows she’s a soft touch—”

“Oh, God. You talked to—” AJ pressed a hand to his forehead. What were the chances that Jason hadn’t heard about that? “You stay away from Elizabeth. Jason will take you apart—”

“Come now, AJ. I think you’re overreacting,” Lila murmured. “Elizabeth can take care of herself—”

“Yeah, I know that, and you know that—but—” AJ stopped. If Edward didn’t want to heed his warnings, if his grandmother didn’t see danger—he wasn’t going to waste his breath. “I had to do damage control, Grandfather. Any progress I’d made with Jason—it’s gone now—”

“I don’t know why you give a damn. You’ll win in court, and Jason will have to come crawling to you—”

“I don’t want that—” His hands dived into his hair as AJ struggled to not to howl with frustration. “Michael has a family that he cares about. He has Bobbie, Elizabeth, Lucas. And Jason. He’s lost his mother. The last thing I want to do is anything that changes that. I want to be a part of his life. Add myself. Not take his family away.”

“And it’s the right thing,” Lila murmured. “Darling, I know you and Jason will work this out—”

“Jason doesn’t trust me,” AJ said tightly. “I don’t blame him. I only just managed to convince him I had nothing to do with Grandfather’s mess, but I know that’s because Elizabeth believes me. I need you to stay out of this. I can do this.”

Edward snorted but Lila silenced him with a glare that might have cut glass. “Edward,” she snapped. “You will let this boy handle this. Michael is his son. Jason is his brother. I think they can work this out.”

“I don’t want to go to court. I don’t want Jason to lose,” AJ admitted. “That doesn’t make anything better. Grandfather—”

Edward looked at his wife for a long moment before taking a deep breath. “I don’t want to do anything that ruins your chances,” he said, gruffly. “If you think you and Jason can work things out, well, then I…I’ll give you that chance.”

Which meant he would give AJ space, but for how long?

Elm Street Pier: Yacht

Zander, with some trepidation stepped onto the yacht, before glancing back at Roscoe. “Mickey, what the hell are we doing here?”

“My partner wants to meet you.” Roscoe shoved him forward, toward the stern of the luxurious yacht where a man was seated at a table, a cigar and a martini in front of him on the glass-topped table.

His hair was dark, his skin olive in complexion. His eyes reminded Zander of a snake as the partner squinted at the two in the sunlight. He bit down on his cigar and beckoned for the duo to join him underneath the shaded awning.

“Mickey, this is your secret weapon?” he asked, a tinge of something South American in his accent. Zander bristled as those dangerous eyes looked him up and down, and then looked away.

Dismissed. Fuck him. He didn’t need this shit. He’d put his cards on the table, and if he didn’t like the pitch, he was out of here.

“Mickey says you want to destroy Sonny Corinthos,” Zander said before Roscoe could say a word. “But you haven’t been able to do dick about it. His men are too loyal to turn, and those who aren’t are too fucking scared of Jason Morgan.”

The man raised his eyes. “And you’re different from them?”

“I don’t give a fuck about loyalty,” Zander retorted.  “I did everything that son of a bitch wanted me to and he still tossed me out like a dog because Jason Morgan took exception to my treatment of his property.”

“His girlfriend, you mean.” The man sat up. “Perhaps it’s time we introduce ourselves, and I’ll be requiring your real name, not the alias Corinthos and Morgan were satisfied with.”

Zander hesitated, but if getting his revenge meant surrendering a secret, then he was game. “Alexander Jerome. From New York City. Bastard son of Victor Jerome.”

“What the fuck, Smith…” Roscoe thumped him in the shoulder. “You’re shitting me—”

“It’s a useless name. Jerome’s been gone nearly a decade and he never acknowledged me. He didn’t care for my mother’s antecedents,” Zander sneered. “There’s no currency in the name, so why fucking bother using it?”

“Fair enough.” The man set down his cigar. “Alcazar. Luis Alcazar.” After a moment, he continued. “Now why don’t you tell me why you’re of any use to me?”

“Because Morgan isn’t gonna touch me. I used to—” And here Zander hesitated, because the moment called for crude talk, for frankness, but to use her this way, it was uncomfortable. She was the only sweet, bright spot in his life. “I dated his sister for a while. And Morgan loves his sister.”

“Fair enough. But the fact that you’re breathing doesn’t make you valuable—”

“You’re never going to destroy Sonny Corinthos until you eliminate Jason Morgan,” Zander told him. “And you’re gonna have a fucking hell of a time doing that.”

“He’s got weaknesses,” Roscoe scoffed. “The girl? He’ll do anything to keep her safe—”

“You think you can go after Elizabeth Webber and break Jason that way?” Zander snorted. “You don’t get it. You kidnap her, you kill her—doesn’t matter. Jason will put his emotions in a little box inside his head, hunt you down and tear you into little pieces for touching her. He’s not Sonny. Sonny falls apart when threatened. He survives because of Jason.”

Alcazar picked up his cigar and examined it for a long moment. “We’d considered kidnapping Elizabeth Webber in exchange for control of some piers. In Mickey’s name, of course.” His smile was nothing more than an upturn of one corner of his mouth, but it seemed to be in response to a joke that neither of them were privy to. “I’m a silent partner.”

“I think you overestimate Morgan,” Roscoe began.

“I can’t stand the son of a bitch,” Zander replied with a dark scowl. “He’s the reason I’m here. That bitch insulted me, clawed at my face, and I got fired for defending myself. But you’re a fucking moron if you don’t give him credit, Mickey. You know I’m right. When Sorel sent that bomb a year ago? Jason Morgan hunted down the explosives experts, the courier—he took them apart. He doesn’t react to attacks the way you think he will. I’m telling you, you’re not going to get anywhere with Sonny Corinthos unless Morgan is gone.”

“So we kill the right-hand man. Simple,” Alcazar said. “A drive-by—”

“Good luck.” Zander shrugged. “You won’t be the first to go after him and you won’t be the last.”

“Well, how would you suggest we take care of the problem?” Alcazar demanded, his patience finally dissipating. “Or are you telling me Sonny Corinthos is indestructible?” He sat up, put down his cigar. “All I’m hearing is what I can’t do.”

“The closest anyone ever came to killing Jason Morgan was the ambush when Moreno died,” Zander returned. “His sister told me he was shot and nearly died. You ambush him with more guns, make it impossible for him to escape. And when he’s gone, you can start taking Sonny Corinthos apart, piece by piece. He has a sister he’s not close to, but he’s not gonna put up with any threat to her. He likes Webber well enough, and he’ll feel obligated to protect her once Morgan is gone. You make him fail in that, you put his ex-kid in danger? He’ll self-destruct on his own.”

Alcazar exhaled slowly before looking at Mickey. “It’s not a bad plan.”

“How do you lure Jason Morgan into an ambush?” Roscoe demanded. “He’s got lightning reflexes—”

“You get someone to lure him to place where he thinks he’s gonna be safe. That’s the hard part,” Zander said. “You’re gonna need to turn someone else. Someone he trusts. Or trick them. He’ll go anywhere Elizabeth asks him to, but she’s not an idiot either, so good luck with that.”

Alcazar smiled then. “Oh, I think I can take care of that. A few more weeks to allow certain things to fall out the way I expect them to, and I’ll have the perfect candidate.” He flicked his eyes to Roscoe. “Good job, Mickey. He’s not a bad secret weapon. I’ve learned more about Corinthos and Morgan in the last ten minutes than I have in the last three months.”

Zander started at that pronouncement—Luis Alcazar had been targeting Sonny for three months and was only now making his move? What the hell was going on here?

He was gonna have to watch his back. Zander and Roscoe went back a way, but Luis Alcazar didn’t give a shit if he lived or died. He was on his own. Nothing new there.

Jake’s: Upstairs Hallway

Elizabeth closed her eyes and took a deep breath before knocking on the door. She had to…she had to do this. To talk to him. To just…make sure that walking away was the right decision.

Courtney was right—if something that had nothing to do with who they were together could affect their relationship, it wasn’t strong enough. It was smart to stop now. To get out before they ruined each other.

She hadn’t been smart before. She’d hung on, clung to the dream so long that there had been nothing left but ashes when she’d finally woken up.

Not this time.

She raised her hand to knock before it was yanked open, and Jason appeared, about to step over the threshold. He stopped, obviously not expecting her. “Elizabeth—”

“Oh.” She chewed on her lip, taking in the jacket he wore and the keys in his hand. Reprieve. “You’re—you’re leaving. I can—”

“I was going for a ride.” He shifted back, stepping to the side so she could enter. When Elizabeth didn’t move, his hand tightened on the edge of the door. “Elizabeth—”

And now that she was standing in front of him, ready to call the whole thing off—

She couldn’t.

“I’m a good person,” she said, softly. He furrowed his brow, opened his mouth to respond. “And you’re a good person.”

“Elizabeth—”

“And so are Courtney and AJ.”

He sighed and dipped his head. “Elizabeth, don’t—”

“Good people should be able to work together.” She swallowed hard. “I love Michael, Jason. I tried to stay out of this, I did. But I can’t. Because Courtney is my friend, and I’ve known AJ for years. And I love that little boy. We are good people who want the best for that little boy—I have to believe that we can work together—”

He looked away and shook his head lightly. “Elizabeth—”

“Because I care about you,” she said in a rush of words. “I always have, but I mean—I just—” She licked her lips. “If this were before, if this was Lucky—” He scowled, but she continued. “I would have done whatever he asked. Whatever made him happy. Because that’s how I judged my life. If Lucky was happy, if I did what he wanted—I can’t do that anymore—”

“Elizabeth—” Jason’s voice was quiet, but there was anguish there. “That’s not—I’m not—” He stepped back. “Come in. Please.”

Hesitantly, she stepped over the threshold and waited for him to shut the door. He dropped his keys on the dresser and looked at her. “I’m sorry about today.”

“I’m not trying to box you in. To convince you to give up—”

“No, I know.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “You weren’t saying anything you haven’t before. Nothing Alexis or Bobbie hasn’t said. My chances in court are next to nothing, and dragging Michael through it would just…”

Her throat felt raw as she forced the words out. “Jason—”

“But you never have to tell me what I want to hear, or do anything because I—” He sliced a hand through the air. “I don’t want that from you. I saw—” He stopped and looked away, swallowing. “I saw you do that before. Last year, I watched you twist yourself around to be what Lucky wanted. I would never—”

She exhaled slowly. “And I know that. I do. Here.” She gestured at her head. “It’s just…it’s hard to believe it everywhere else. I have a lot of…damage from before—”

“There’s nothing wrong with you,” he cut in, his eyes fierce. “Elizabeth—”

“Baggage then,” she continued, with a hesitant smile at his complete faith in her. At least one of them had it. She bit her lip. “It’s there. And I can’t pretend it isn’t.”

“I’m not asking you to.”

She could do this. She could be honest with herself, with him. About anything. This was Jason. He was safe.

Elizabeth stepped forward until she stood just before him, tilting her head up to meet his eyes. “Last night, in the alley—today—”

“If you’re not ready—”

“It felt right,” Elizabeth interrupted. “And it felt good. And I wished—” She shook her head. “No. No regrets. If it had happened last year, I wasn’t ready to do anything about it then. I am now. I want to be with you.”

She hesitantly reached out, her fingertips brushing the soft cotton of his black shirt. She flicked her eyes back at him. “And not in some…abstract sense. I mean…” She pressed her hands against his chest, his skin warm under the cotton. “Now. Tonight.”

“Elizabeth—”

She slid her hand up slightly to cover his heart. She’d felt it before—could remember checking it during that winter in her studio. He slept so soundly, so little movement, she would often lean over at night to check his heartbeat.

And it was quicker now, his breath had changed. She had never really let herself believe a man like Jason would want her—would find her attractive, but he did. She could see it in his eyes, feel it in the way his body had tensed.

“But maybe you would rather go out for a ride,” she teased as she slid up on her toes and pressed her mouth to his quickly. “You know I like the bike—”

She moved, as if going towards the door, but he laughed, the sound low and rumbling through his chest as he lightly tugged her back, letting her almost stumble into him. Her answering grin was swallowed by his mouth as he dipped his head, speared his hands in her hair and kissed her.

This. This feeling, this sensation, this dizzy, intoxicating sensation—this was why she had to give this a chance. She wanted to drown herself in him, in his touch, in the way everything just ignited inside her when he was with her. Elizabeth slid her hands up his chest again, moving under his jacket so she could shove the leather from his shoulders.

She fisted her hands in his shirt, pulling him backwards toward the bed. Jason hesitated when her knees brushed the edge. His hands resting at her hips, his thumbs brushing the skin just under her shirt, he raised his head and licked his lips. “Elizabeth—” he began, his voice a bit rough. “We don’t—”

She raised a brow, and swiftly turned so that she could lightly shove him on the bed before climbing on top, her denim-clad thighs straddling him on either side. “Do you know how long I’ve been thinking about this?” she asked, her tone idle as the tip of her fingers lightly danced on his abdomen, on the bared skin where his shirt had tugged up.

His eyes were dark in the dimly lit room as he braced himself up on his elbows. “Not as long as I have,” Jason managed.

“I should have felt guilty,” Elizabeth mused with a smile that felt wicked even as it slid across her face. “I mean, you were hurt and I was supposed to be taking care of you, but every time I changed your bandage…” Her fingers traced the scar that bullet had left. “I had this crazy thought about just…” She bit her lip, but what the hell? “Licking you.”

He didn’t laugh at her, didn’t even smile at the thought of that silly girl thinking such naughty thoughts about a bullet-ridden older man in her care. Instead, Jason sat up, tugging her closer, bringing her into closer contact with all of him. Her breath caught—she could feel him, even through two layers of denim. “If you had,” he began, but stopped and shook his head. “I want this to be right for you,” he said, finally, his lips feathering along her jaw.

“Being with you makes it right,” she murmured. “You are—this is what I want.” She rocked back lightly, heard his breath hitch. “I’m not going to pretend anymore.” She leaned down, nipped at his mouth. “Are we done talking yet?”

He answered with a light growl that had her giggling as Jason dipped her to the side, her back against the mattress. “I think we’ve talked enough,” he told her with a wicked grin before he took her mouth again.

Promises mean everything when you’re little
And the world’s so big
I just don’t understand how
You can smile with all those tears in your eyes
Tell me everything is wonderful now
Please don’t tell me everything is wonderful now
– Wonderful, Everclear

---

Sunday, May 5, 2002

AJ & Courtney’s Apartment: Bathroom  

Courtney wrinkled her nose and examined the circles under her eyes in the mirror. “Ugh.”

“Your first bar fight?” AJ asked with a smirk as he reached past her for his toothbrush and toothpaste. “They get easier.”

“I’m not planning to make a career out of it,” she muttered. “I warned Zander to knock it off. He just had to push Elizabeth.” She perched on the edge of the bathtub as her husband began to brush his teeth. “He made some crack about Jason, and she just—she literally lunged across the table at him. I didn’t know she could do that.”

“She’s probably feeling it today.” He rinsed the toothbrush and placed it back in the holder. “I’m just glad Jason was there before it got worse.” He frowned. “That sounds weird to me.”

“Are you and he…maybe getting along better?” Courtney asked, trying to keep the hope out of her voice. If they could co-exist, then things could just…stay the same. They might have to move to a bigger apartment which they might be able to swing. Bobbie still had a two-room apartment available at the Brownstone which would work great—

“We’re not at each other’s throats.” AJ sighed and leaned against the cabinet. “You know I’m still planning to file for custody.”

“I know.” She looked down at her fingers. “And that was fine before.”

“Before?”

“Before Jason came home. I think Elizabeth cares about him.” She chewed her bottom lip. “Can’t you…. just avoid her testimony? Like can’t—” But he was already shaking his head. “AJ—”

“I’m sorry. I know it puts her in an awkward spot. I do. But she lives with Michael. She’s one of the people who is in his life. Even if I didn’t call her, a judge would subpoena her. Courtney—”

“I just…she was so upset by your grandfather’s visits to Michael. I don’t know everything she’s been through, AJ, but I was here for the wedding. I know she and Jason have a history. I just hate asking her to do anything that…” She sighed. “But that sounds stupid and whiny when I think about the outcome. I know how important Michael is to you—”

“Hey, it is not stupid and whiny.” AJ tugged her to her feet. “You just moved to town. You found your father, your brother. You got married five minutes later. I know how much Elizabeth and Gia’s friendship has meant to you. It is not stupid to avoid messing with that.”

“But it doesn’t change the fact I have to.” Courtney sighed and went into the bedroom to change. She pulled out a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. “Because you’re right. Elizabeth is stuck in the middle. It’s not like I put her there.”

“Being friends with Bobbie, knowing my family—yeah, she was kind of already there.” AJ leaned against the doorway. “She’s not just going to be there for me. You know Alexis will use her for Jason’s side. She’s about as close as a person comes to being neutral.” He hesitated. “The last time Jason saw me talking to her—”

“He flipped, yeah, Elizabeth told me.” Courtney tugged the denim over her hips.  “I guess you want me to run interference—”

“I don’t like asking—”

“But it’s for the best.” She picked up her brush. “What should I tell her? The custody battle is still on? That she should get herself ready?”

“I don’t know.” AJ looked away. “I’m sorry, Courtney—” He broke off. “Maybe she can talk to him. I don’t want to drag Michael into court. I’ve talked to lawyers—I have a good shot—”

“I’ll talk to her.” Courtney shot him a half-smile. “It’s not like she doesn’t know this is coming.”

General Hospital: Nurse’s Station

“Bobbie, can you see about scheduling a few more scrub nurses tomorrow?” Alan asked as he handed her the surgery schedule for the afternoon.

“Sure,” Bobbie said, her tone clipped. The last thing she wanted to see right now was a Quartermaine male. Not after the conversation she’d had with Elizabeth the day before.

Alan frowned and tilted his head to the side. “We don’t have enough nurses?” he asked, puzzled.

“We’re fine on the numbers,” Bobbie said. She picked up the schedule and turned to begin plugging it into the computer. “Did you know?” she asked when he didn’t walk away.

“Know about what?” Alan asked. “Bobbie—”

“About your father visiting my grandson and telling him I saw raising him as a burden,” Bobbie snapped.

“Oh.” Alan’s cheeks reddened. “No. I knew my father was upset, but Bobbie—”

“I don’t know where your family gets the nerve in thinking your claim to Michael means any less than mine,” she continued, jabbing at keyboard keys. “He’s my grandson every bit as much as he is yours. I know you haven’t been in his life. I know my daughter was unfair—”

“Bobbie—”

“It’s not like I don’t get it. It’s not like I don’t feel sympathetic, but you know how hard-headed Carly is—” She cleared her throat. “Was,” she managed to say. “She was stubborn, and she was petty. I couldn’t have changed her mind no matter what I said—”

“I didn’t know, Bobbie—”

“Any chance I had of trying to get Jason to settle this amicably with an outcome we could all support—that’s gone.” She snorted. “You’re just lucky he didn’t throw the old bastard off the roof—”

“Now, wait just a minute—” Alan slapped a hand on the counter. “I didn’t know what my father was up to, Bobbie. I never would have supported it. But he is my grandson, and AJ deserves a damn chance to be his father. He’s never had a fair one—”

“You think I don’t get that?” Bobbie demanded, unfazed by his show of temper. “You think I haven’t told Jason that? I’ve talked to him until I’m blue in the face, but no matter how sober AJ is now, no matter how good he’s doing now, Jason is never going to forget the damage AJ is capable of when he drinks. You’re asking Jason to put an innocent little boy in the hands of someone who destroyed his life—”

“How long is AJ supposed to pay for that?” Alan shot back. “Jason’s life is fine now. He thinks it’s better. He doesn’t want to be a Quartermaine, fine. But Michael is one—” He cut off when Bobbie laughed, the sound harsh and bitter.

“How long is AJ supposed to pay for that accident? Are you kidding me? If you or your father thought you had a prayer to get Michael on your own, you wouldn’t be standing here spouting off about AJ’s rights.” Bobbie snatched up a stack of charts. “You tell your father to stay away from me or I will make it my life’s mission to make sure he never sees that little boy again.”

Corinthos Penthouse: Living Room

Sonny lifted his brow when Jason arrived that morning, a black eye blooming on his face. “Rough night?” he asked, reaching for the carafe of coffee resting on a table warmer. He poured his partner a mug of their signature roast. “What does the other guy look like?”

“Zander Smith.” Jason accepted the coffee. “I want him gone.”

“That’s not news,” Sonny said as Jason joined him at the breakfast table. “What’s changed?” He frowned as Jason’s mouth thinned. “Did you get into a fight with him?”

“He was at Jake’s last night,” Jason said, his tone clipped. Angry. “Harassing Elizabeth, Courtney, and Gia. Elizabeth wouldn’t say how it started, but he said something to her, she threw a drink at him, he threw one back, and—”

Sonny blinked. “Elizabeth started a bar fight? Our Elizabeth? One hundred pounds soaking wet?” He grinned at the thought. “I would have liked to see that—”

“She started it, but he punched her in the face.”

Sonny set his coffee down, his demeanor deadly serious now. “He fought back?” It was one thing for Zander to defend himself—the drink had been too much, but you didn’t hit a woman in Sonny’s organization. Even one who hit you first. “He put his hands on her? What about my sister?”

“She stayed out of the fray. I don’t think she has Elizabeth or Gia’s temper.” Or Jason’s, Sonny thought, as a muscle ticked in his partner’s cheek. “I don’t have the authority to fire him outright,” Jason continued, “Nico doesn’t answer to me.”

“But you want him gone.” Sonny sighed and leaned back. “I don’t blame you, Jase. But we generally don’t fire guys for getting into bar fight. I’m not happy, but if Elizabeth hit him first—”

Jason leaned forward, his eyes like ice chips. “I want him gone.”

“I get that, and part of me wants to leap there.” Sonny took a sip of his coffee, taking a moment to choose his words carefully. “We’ve discussed this, Jase, as it’s not the first time Zander has harassed Elizabeth. I told you that the people who work for us have a certain view of Elizabeth. I never discouraged it, and you didn’t want to either. But we get rid of Zander Smith—outright fire him—over a barfight—you’re crystalizing that view. There’s no going back.”

Jason placed his hands on the table, the fingers curled into fists. “I know that.”

“You broke up the fight?” Sonny asked. “How bad was it?”

“I took him out to the back alley—he probably has some bruised ribs. I told him to get lost, but the order needs to come from you.” Jason hesitated. “I’m not—I can’t make the statement you want me to make about Elizabeth. We’re—we’re not there yet. But I can’t let this pass. She’s gonna have a black eye and another swing—he’d have broken her nose. If Elizabeth hadn’t followed me outside…” He shook his head.

“Jason…” Sonny leaned forward. “Look, we’ve been pushing Nico and Zander as it is. I know Nico’s skimming money. I don’t know how, I don’t know how much. He wanted to use Zander as his fall guy. I already demoted the punk once for messing with Elizabeth, but I could do that because it wasn’t about her. It was about you and your authority.”

He rubbed his jaw. “I’m just worried if we cut him loose now—it pushes Nico the wrong way. Maybe he makes a mistake and we can move in faster. But maybe he doubles down. I don’t know, Jase. Is this a risk we want to take over a bar fight where Elizabeth threw the first punch?”

“She was provoked,” Jason said shortly. “Zander went after her at Kelly’s, trashed her in front of Nico’s crew, and last night—our guys are at Jake’s. He sat down at a table with Elizabeth and your sister. With a cop’s sister. And he said something to Elizabeth that pissed her off so much she threw a drink at him. What’s Nico going to think if we do nothing?”

“Yeah, you’ve got a point there. We’ve demoted him for less lately.” Still, Sonny hesitated. “I’m just—I’m not sure you really get what you’re saying when we start firing guys for looking at Elizabeth the wrong way. We stalled his promotion because you didn’t trust him, we demoted him when he challenged your authority. Most of the men already view Elizabeth as off limits because of your past relationship, because she’s a friend of mine. We could give Zander another warning, we could let Nico make the final decision—”

“He sat down at her table and goaded her into picking a fight,” Jason said, tightly. “Because he wants to piss me off. It’s not about her for him. It’s about me. And it’s always going to be about me as long I work for you. Why are you fighting this, Sonny? Is it about Nico? About finding out how bad he’s skimming?”

Sonny pursed his lips and took a minute. “Elizabeth matters to me. My sister matters. I’m glad you were there last night. That it didn’t get too bad. We have to think about the bigger picture. At the moment, Elizabeth’s reputation has more to do with what happened three years ago. You make this statement, you fire someone who was technically defending himself—you don’t get to take that back. You’re saying something about her.”

When Jason hesitated, Sonny continued. “If he’d hit her outright, we’d have a better argument. He talked to her. She threw beer at him. She hit him first. There are a lot of guys who are just going to think she was asking for it.”

“They can say whatever they want,” Jason said, his tone calmer now, but his eyes were still hard. “She’s off limits. No one touches her and gets away with it.”

“Fair enough. As long as you go into this with your eyes open.” Sonny reached for his phone. “I’ll make the call.”

Kelly’s: Dining Room

“Yes!” Courtney threw her first in the air as the last dock worker disappeared through the doors. “Lunch rush is officially over!”

Elizabeth smirked. “You’d think you didn’t like this job much.” She winced. “Smiling hurts.”

Courtney laughed as she slid onto the stool. “Yeah, I thought you might be in pain today. You don’t look too bad for your first bar fight.”

“Hmm…” Elizabeth gingerly touched the side of her face, where a bruise had bloomed large, dark and purple that morning when she’d woke. “Yeah, I didn’t feel it last night.”

“Yeah, I bet pain wasn’t the main feature.” Courtney offered a wicked smile. “I noticed you didn’t hurry back inside and I left with Gia, so…”

“So Jason gave me a ride home.” Elizabeth bit her lip to suppress a smile at the memory. Of that moment in the alley, feeling the brick against her back, Jason’s hot skin—

“I’ll bet he did.”

Elizabeth tried to scowl at her, but failed because she just couldn’t stop smiling today. She knew all the reasons she’d stayed away from Jason—all the reasons she’d avoided a moment like last night, but…maybe it was time to stop being scared.

To stop running.

“Um, since you’re in a good mood,” Courtney said slowly, “I—I talked to AJ this morning. I hate this, Elizabeth, I do, but—”

Elizabeth sighed. “Well, at least I got the whole morning.” She poured herself a glass of water. “He’s going to subpoena me, isn’t he?”

“Yeah. I mean, well, that’s the plan. But…” The blonde laced her fingers together. “He thought maybe you could help keep this out of court.”

Elizabeth stopped. Looked at her. “Courtney.”

“I’m sorry, I hate this—”

“The only way to keep this out of court is if Jason agrees to give AJ some sort of visitation, some sort of custody agreement. You’re asking me to convince…” She stopped, shook her head. “You can’t ask me that—”

“I can.” Courtney straightened her shoulders. “C’mon. I know AJ. He’s not going to back down. He’s going to court if he has to. You know Jason. Do you think he’s not going to do the same? They both think they’re protecting Michael.”

“Yeah, but—”

“I didn’t know AJ when he was drinking,” Courtney continued, “but I know about the accident. I know about the fight with Carly when she had the miscarriage. I know he’s said and done horrible things when he drinks—”

“And that’s why I can’t support him. That’s why I can’t tell Jason he should give in, even a little,” Elizabeth said sharply. “Because I have seen AJ as a drunk. His sister was one of my best friends—I know his triggers, I know how destructive AJ can be. I am relieved beyond measure that you’re happy with him, that he’s done so well for so long. I can only hope it continues, but you’re asking to put a little boy that I love in that situation. Forget that Jason loves him as his own son—I love Michael, too. And I’ve seen the hell he’s been put through—”

“Why is AJ the only one who doesn’t get a second chance?” Courtney demanded. “You know how he lost custody in the first place, don’t you? Carly lied to him. Jason lied. And then Jason blackmailed him. Sonny threatened to kill him—”

Elizabeth pressed her lips together and took a deep breath. “I’m sympathetic, Courtney. I am. I know AJ never got much of a fair chance.” Elizabeth sighed. “Courtney—”

“AJ is going to file after Memorial Day,” her friend said bluntly. “And we’ve talked to family lawyers. Once the judge finds out the way Jason lied when Michael was born—he’s going to get custody. Michael is going to be forced to talk to doctors. To lawyers. To the judge. Is that what Jason wants?”

“Jason isn’t putting him through anything,” Elizabeth retorted. She slapped her hand against the counter. “That’s your husband. That’s the Quartermaines. Damn it, Courtney. Stop making this black and white. Jason loves Michael. I love Michael. I want that kid to have the best chance he can, and forgive me if I’m not entirely sure your husband is the answer.”

Courtney shoved off the stool. “You’re going to be subpoenaed whether we like it or not. Is that what you’re going to tell a judge?”

“Courtney—”

“You know AJ is sober, that he’s been working hard.” The blonde’s blue eyes pleaded with her. “You know that we’re happy together, that I’d be a good stepmother. I would protect Michael.” She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “I don’t want to fight with you.”

“I don’t want to fight either.” Elizabeth bit her lip. “Jason is aware that his chances in court are minimal,” she said softly. “He hasn’t decided what he wants to do about that, because he doesn’t want to put Michael through all of that if it’s not going change anything. Beyond that—I don’t know, Courtney. I promise, if I end up on the stand, I’ll be honest. I know how hard AJ has worked, I’ve told Jason that too.”

“But…” Courtney sighed. “You don’t trust it.”

“No,” Elizabeth admitted. “Because he drinks to escape the Quartermaines, and I think, at the moment, he’s just running from that problem. He hasn’t solved it. Do I think he would ever hurt Michael on purpose? No. The fact that he’s given everyone space—” She tapped her fingers on the counter top. “I can talk to Jason again, but—”

“I hate this.” Courtney grimaced as customers came in. She slid off the stool. “The last thing I want to do is make things worse, Elizabeth. I know we’re on opposite sides here, but I—”

“I’m not going to let it change our friendship,” Elizabeth said, lifting her chin. “We’re just…we’re both looking out for Michael.”

Courtney flashed her a smile as she went to wait on customers, but neither of them were quite convinced.

Oasis Strip Club: Back Office

Nico was already muttered when he tossed his cell phone back on the desk. At one the tables, counting money, Lenny glanced up with an arched brow. “Corinthos call with bad news?” his right-hand man asked sourly.

“That little fucking idiot got himself fired, that’s what.” Nico stalked across the room and poured himself two fingers of whiskey. “I knew his shit with Morgan was going to be a problem, but then he went and got himself fired over a fucking woman—”

“Not the same—” Lenny straightened. “Nicky—”

Nico tossed back the entire glass, the harsh liquid pouring a trail of fire down his throat. He’d poured time and energy into Zander Smith, hoping he would be the perfect patsy to take the fall for the drug trade in Port Charles once Nico was safely ensconced in Vegas. He’d be the perfect suspect since he’d dabbled in the product before—had come up on the rave circuit.

But no, the piece of shit had to go and make personal enemies with Jason Morgan, who was notorious for his ability to focus, to find problems where no one else could see them. Like he needed the fucking extra eyes on him right now.

“The bar fight?” Lenny’s dark brows furrowed. “I thought the bitch took the first swing—”

“Yeah, that bitch is Jason Morgan’s woman. It doesn’t matter if she broke his nose and ran him over. He’s not allowed to touch her. I told him to leave her alone, didn’t I? I warned him not to push Morgan after last week, but he couldn’t help himself—”

“I told you he was a hothead.” The older man shrugged. “He ain’t got a head for this business.”

“Yeah, well, he knows too much about how we run things here.” Nico reached for his cell phone. “I gotta neutralize him, keep him on my side. Maybe I can set him up somewhere for a while until this cools down—”

“Why not get rid of him?”

“And make Corinthos look in my direction more?” Nico demanded. “Fuck that. Why go to the trouble when I can buy the little shit—” He stopped when Zander picked up on the other line. “Smith, get the fuck over here. Now.”

Kelly’s: Back Alley

Elizabeth leaned against the brick and tipped her head up to the sky, closing her eyes and wishing like hell she’d never given up cigarettes three years ago. What she wouldn’t give right now for the rush of nicotine right now…

The heavy metal door to the back of the diner swung open and she heard the heavy steps of boots rather than the light squeak of sneakers she had expected. She opened her eyes to find Jason’s concerned gaze on her.

“Hey,” he said, tilting his head. “Courtney said you were on your break.” He hesitated, and she knew his eyes were on the bruise at her cheekbone the way they narrowed. “You okay?”

“About last night? Yeah. Other than the bruise, I feel fine.” She took a deep breath, reached out and grasped a fistful of his maroon shirt, pulled him closer and kissed him. She’d spent hours last night thinking about that embrace at Jake’s, about the way his mouth had moved against hers, the heat of his fingers against her skin—

His hand cupped her jaw, tipping her head back. Jason moved closer, his other hand sliding around her waist, his skin searing where it met the small of her back.

She winced when his fingers brushed against the bruise on her cheek, and he drew back, their breathing a bit shallow. “I forgot,” she murmured with a half-smile.

“Yeah…” Another light touch of his fingertips against her cheek bone before he stepped back. “About Zander—”

“Look, I probably shouldn’t have gone after him,” Elizabeth said quickly. “He just—he said…” She looked away. The last thing Jason needed to know was Zander making cracks about her rape. They’d never find his body.  “He said something that I should have let go, I just—I didn’t. And I’m sorry. I know things are tense with him at work—”

“I had him fired,” Jason cut in. “And I’m hoping you’ll evict him from Kelly’s.”

She closed her mouth, blinking at that. “You…” Fired him. “Because of the bar fight?”

“It was the last straw.” He pressed his lips together. “If you take away his room, and we take away his job—”

“He might leave town.” She nodded. “Okay. I can do that. It’s not like I love him living upstairs anyway. Still, I’m sorry if I caused trouble last night—”

“Zander never should have sat down and talked to you. Anything that happened after that is on him.” He rubbed the back of his neck and looked away, down the alley that led to the parking lot. “I don’t get what my sister saw in him.”

“Emily has a soft heart,” Elizabeth murmured, missing her old friend. Wondering if she and Emily would still be close now with everything that had happened. “She sees the best in people, and for a while, I think there was something in him worth saving. That’s not true anymore.” She bit her lip, hating to rock the boat but… “Have you talked to any of the Quartermaines about what happened? With Michael?”

He looked back at her, squinting slightly at the change in conversation. Finally, he said, “AJ said he didn’t do it. That he tore into Edward about it.” Jason leaned against the building, their shoulders brushing. “I don’t think he was involved.”

“Yeah…” Elizabeth sighed, hating this whole thing but knowing she had a responsibility to do what Courtney had asked. For Jason and Michael’s sake. “AJ is planning to file after Memorial Day. You’ll be served the first week in June.”

Jason’s cheek twitched, but he had no change in expression otherwise. “You know that for sure?”

“Yeah, Courtney and I—” Argued about it, but Elizabeth didn’t want to say that much. “She and AJ—they don’t want to go to court.”

He looked at her, his blue eyes guarded. He straightened. “Elizabeth—”

“She asked me—AJ doesn’t want to drag Michael through all of it—” She trailed off and swallowed. She could almost see the wall go up. “Jason, we’ve talked about this. You’ve said exactly the same thing—”

“You think I should give him custody?”

“No!” Elizabeth scowled. Damn it, this wasn’t the first time they’d broached the subject of settling this out of court. Did he think this whole thing would go away? “Jason, nothing has changed, okay? There’s nothing happening here that you didn’t know about it. I told you AJ was going to file at some point, I suspected it would be when Michael finished school—”

“AJ told me he plans to subpoena you,” Jason cut in, with voice almost a growl. “What are you going to say when you’re asked where Michael should live?”

Oh, no. “Jason—” Elizabeth shook her head. “Don’t make this about me. I didn’t create this situation, I’m just trying to survive it—”

“What are you going to say?” he repeated.

“Exactly what I’ve told you,” she shot back. “AJ’s sober. His marriage is solid. His wife is amazing and would make a great stepmother—”

“So you think Michael should go with him—”

“I’m not sure a judge would let me testify about my worries, about my fears that AJ’s sobriety might be temporary. I’m not an expert.” She threw up her hands. “What do you want me to say? Should I go in there and lie?”

“Elizabeth—”

“I also hope I get to the chance to say how much Michael loves being with his grandmother, with his uncle. That I’ve seen firsthand how much you love him.” She fisted her hands at her side. “I hate this, Jason. Don’t put me in the middle.”

His cell phone rang, cutting off any response he might have made, but his eyes were lit with irritation, his shoulders tense. “I have to go,” he said after looking at the screen. “We’ll talk about this later.”

Jason left then, his boots echoing down the alley. When he’d turned the corner, Elizabeth swore and kicked the side of a dumpster. This was why she’d been holding herself back. Staying away from him.

One step forward, eight thousand back.

Courtland Street

Zander kicked at the gravel as he trudged past away from the strip club, passing increasingly broken and patched buildings. So what if he’d popped that uptight bitch in the face? Hadn’t she had it coming? He’d have scars on his face from her nails. Typical. Women could land the first punch, but fuck if you couldn’t return the favor.

This was all Jason Morgan’s fault.  He’d come back to town like he owned the damned place and ruined everything. Why the fuck did Morgan have to have a stick up his goddamn ass about letting Zander move up? Hadn’t Zander helped them? Gone to the police about Sorel? He’d tried to change, to be a better person for Emily.

Sweet Emily, who’d thought there was something worth saving inside.

She’d been wrong, but he’d tried for her. He would have done anything for her.

But she’d left. Just like his high society father who’d knocked up one of his whores and walked away without a backward glance when she’d looked for money. His mother had wasted away on heroin first, then crack when the money ran out. She’d been dead for the better part of a decade, and he’d spent that time on the streets of New York.

He deserved to have his own crew, his own club. To collect his own money. Make his own small part of Sonny’s empire. He hadn’t lusted for the top spot—too much scrutiny, too much effort was required. Zander hadn’t been greedy or ambitious. He’d worked his fucking ass off under Sorel, then Corinthos. So what if he’d worked for Sorel? So had more than a dozen men in Sonny’s organization. Hadn’t they merged the fucking territory?

Fucking hypocrites. Holding him back. Well, he’d show them. He’d go to Miami, get hooked up with a sweet job and enjoy the sun, the water, and the bitches in bikinis. He was done playing the game in Port Charles. Done trying to be something he wasn’t.

A dark car rolled to a stop just next to him on the street, a window rolling down in the backseat. “Zander Smith.”

He stopped and squinted at the car, but he couldn’t attach a face to the voice. “What?” he snarled.

“I hear you’re looking for new employment.”

Zander scowled, but then the window rolled down fully. “Holy, shit. Mickey! What the hell are you doing?”

Michael “Mickey” Roscoe, once the right-hand man to Joseph Sorel and an enforcer under Anthony Moreno, grinned at his old comrade and pushed open the door. “Get in, kid. I got a business proposition for you.”

I came in like a wrecking ball
I never hit so hard in love
All I wanted was to break your walls
All you ever did was wreck me
Yeah, you, you wreck me
– Wrecking Ball, Miley Cyrus

---

Saturday, May 4, 2002

Quartermaine Estate: Foyer

 AJ stormed through the door and into the foyer, ignoring the protests of Alice the maid as he bellowed for his grandfather. His pulse was racing, his muscles quivering—he couldn’t remember the last time he had been quite this goddamn livid.

Instead of Edward, Ned stepped out from the front parlor, a sheaf of papers in his hand. “Junior, having a bad day?” he asked dryly.

“Where is he?” AJ demanded, his hands so tightly fisted at his side that they ached. “Where the hell is our grandfather?”

“Taking a meeting at ELQ,” came the quiet and gentle tone of Lila behind them as Reginald wheeled her in from the conservatory. “And you’ll use a decent tone when you’re in my home.”

“Well, it’s Monica’s—” Ned began the old refrain, but AJ cut him off with an annoyed glance. “Sorry. Reflex.”

“I’m sorry, Grandmother, but he’s gone too far this time,” AJ said, struggling to keep his tone even.

“That may be, but he is still your grandfather, AJ.” Lila lifted her chin, but her eyes were somber. Resigned. “What’s he done now?”

“He went to my son’s school,” AJ told them, still reeling from Courtney’s revelations. “I don’t know how he managed to convince the headmaster, but he’s been meeting with Michael for the last few days. Telling him he’ll be coming here to live, that he’s a burden on Bobbie—”

Ned closed his eyes and shook his head. “That’s a new low. Even for him.”

“AJ—” Lila attempted.

“You should be grateful that I’m here and not Jason. Elizabeth, I’m sure has told him by now, and if you think I’m angry—”

“He’ll raze the old man to the ground,” Ned said. He looked to their grandmother. “You need to speak with him. If Grandfather upsets Michael, it might hurt AJ’s chances in court.” He hesitated and looked at AJ. “For what it’s worth, I’ve tried to talk to him. I knew he was angry after the will reading.”

“I know.” AJ dipped his head. “I was, too.” And hurt that Carly had tried to reach out from the grave to devastate him and his family. And what had they done to her but love Michael and want to be in his life? “I know Grandfather just wants to be part of Michael’s life. I love him, Grandmother, but I can’t let him ruin my chances.”

“I understand, AJ. And I will speak to him.” Lila pursed her lips. “Reggie, I’ll need to you to contact Jason—”

“Let me—” AJ waited a moment, taking a deep breath. “Let me speak with him. I need him to know that I wasn’t part of this, that I don’t condone it. If it comes from you, it won’t mean as much.”

“Fair enough.” Lila tilted her head. “I hope that you and Jason can work something out. I’d hate to see this dragged into court.”

“It’s not my first choice, Grandmother, but I’ll do whatever has to be done.”

Kelly’s: Courtyard

Elizabeth wrinkled her nose as she spied the older man striding towards the courtyard from the parking lot. This was all her day needed.

“Ah, Elizabeth, just the young lady I wanted to see.” Edward offered her a broad smile, with a bit of chagrin in his eyes. She sighed. She should have known.

“I’m not running interference with Jason,” she told him as she scooped another set of dirty plates into her plastic tub. “You did the crime, Mr. Quartermaine, you do the time.” She paused and looked at him. “Has he found you yet?”

“Ah, no, but I spoke to my wife…” Edward cleared his throat, straightened his shoulders. “It’s a crime to see my great-grandson?”

She closed her eyes and cursed herself. Why did he have to do this? Why did he have to put that note of hurt, of despondence into his voice? She was such a sucker.

“It’s a crime,” Elizabeth said, setting the tub down and turning to him, “when you tell a five-year-old boy who’s just lost his mother that he’s a burden to his grandmother.”

At that, Edward did look slightly embarrassed. “I’m not saying I haven’t made mistakes—”

“I’m not talking to Jason for you,” Elizabeth said. “You’re wasting your breath—”

“This isn’t about Jason. I wanted—” He hesitated. “When AJ files for custody, it’s likely you’ll be called—”

“And you’d like me not to talk so much about what Michael told me.” She rolled her eyes. “You’re wasting your breath. If I end up having to testify, even if I wanted to omit it, Alexis would ask.”

“Elizabeth, I’ve always thought of you as one of the family,” Edward with his smile firmly in place, even if his jaw was slightly more clenched. “You’ve always been so good to Emily. And you’ve been close with Jason—”

“I’m going to do what’s best for Michael, Mr. Quartermaine.” Elizabeth picked up her tub of dirty dishes and discarded food. “I think it’s about time someone started putting him first.”

“But—”

“Goodbye, Mr. Quartermaine.”

Elm Street Pier

Jason slowed his steps when he saw AJ on a bench at the bottom of the steps. Other than another member of the Quartermaine family, AJ was might be the person he wanted to see least in the world right now.

But he’d promised Elizabeth last night that he’d give AJ the benefit of the doubt when it came to Edward bothering Michael. He wasn’t convinced AJ wasn’t working with the Quartermaines to get custody, but he had to admit—it didn’t exactly seem like something AJ would do.

“Jason.” AJ got to his feet when Jason stepped off the bottom of the steps. “Hey. I was hoping to catch you on the way to the warehouse.”

“Is this about Michael?” Jason asked bluntly.

“I know Elizabeth told you that Grandfather was…that he was harassing Michael at his school.” AJ looked away, his skin mottled with suppressed anger. “I can imagine how angry you were when you found out, because I was, too. I still am.”

Jason looked out over the harbor. “Elizabeth said you didn’t have a hand in it.”

“She’s right. Look, I want my son. I think I’ve been up front about that. I haven’t pretended for a second that I don’t intend to use everything I can to get that done. Including asking Elizabeth to testify—”

Jason swung back again with a glare. “I told you. Leave her out of it—”

“I don’t want to have this argument with you again,” AJ cut in. “I just want to make it clear there’s no way in hell I would ever allow Grandfather to say those things to Michael.” He looked down at his hands, and for the first time, Jason could see the thick calluses that had developed, an indication of the hard labor AJ now did as a forklift operator. “You don’t remember our childhood—”

“I don’t want to talk about—”

“I wish I didn’t,” AJ cut in. “The last thing I want is Michael to go through what we did. Every little thing was measured, considered. If we brought home art projects, we were judged on them as if they were candidates for a museum. Every grade, every test was agonized over. The pressure to be the Quartermaines Grandfather wanted, that Mom and Dad wanted—” He swallowed. “I crumbled under the weight of it. I wasn’t strong enough to drown them out. I drank to make them stop. You went with the flow. You were smarter than I was—”

“That’s not who I am now,” Jason said roughly, for the first time recognizing the pain in the older man’s expression. “I’m not Jason Quartermaine—”

“No, you’re not,” AJ said quietly. “But you were once. And I’m afraid that if Grandfather has his way, Michael will grow up with that pressure. With soul-crushing expectations. I’m sure Michael is as smart as you were—as you are now—don’t shake your head, Jason. I know what you do for a living, and you don’t do it for long if you’re an idiot.”

“AJ—”

“I want to be a father to my son,” AJ told him. “But I promise you, Jason, if I have that chance, I won’t let Grandfather do those things to him. I’ve talked to Grandmother. I’m making it clear that I won’t participate in any custody suit he files on his own, and I won’t allow Grandfather anywhere near Michael if he continues to act this way.”

Jason dipped his head, taking a deep breath. He wasn’t sure what to do with this information, with this insight into a man he preferred to ignore. But he knew AJ was being honest with him, and if there anything Jason respected — it was honesty. “I called the school and told them if I found out Edward met with Michael again, I’d have Alexis sue them.”

“Good, good. Uh…” AJ scratched the back of his neck. “I have to get to work. My shift starts soon.” He started down the pier, but then stopped and turned back. “I hope—I hope we can come to some sort of agreement about what’s best for Michael. It’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

He left then, not waiting for Jason to answer. Not that Jason knew what he would say. In less than three weeks, everything he’d taken for granted about the uselessness of the man who was technically his brother had shifted and changed.

And he didn’t know what the hell to do about it.

Jake’s: Bar

“This day.” Elizabeth tossed back a long swig of her beer, then wrinkled her nose. “Oh, man. Who suggested the cheapest beer?”

“The girl who wanted to go on a Caribbean vacation this summer, which means we have to save every penny.” Gia shrugged and considered the thick dark liquid in her pint glass. “Not sure this is worth it. Next time, we just get the big bottle of wine.”

“But then we’d miss all this atmosphere,” Courtney said with a bright smile as she gestured toward the rest of the room, filled with dock hands and men playing beer. The trio of girls were the only females—save Jake behind the bar.

But no one approached them or gave them a second look. Courtney was Sonny’s sister, Gia was a cop’s sister, and Elizabeth…

Elizabeth decided not to think about why men who worked for Jason and Sonny were ignoring her.

“So, how did telling the boys about Granddaddy Q go?” Gia asked, folding her arms on the table. “You worked all day—”

“You didn’t come back last night after telling him?” Courtney raised her eyebrows. “Do we have something else to put on the agenda?”

“No,” Elizabeth drawled with a roll of her eyes. “It was okay. He was pissed as hell, like I’m sure AJ was. I talked him out of going right to the mansion, but it was a close call.” She lifted a shoulder. “We talked, and then we went for a ride.” When Gia started to wiggle her eyebrows, she laughed and punched her roommate lightly in the shoulder. “No, I mean on the bike. I don’t know what’s going to happen next, but I’m done pretending that we’re just…friends.”

“Thank God.” Gia raised her hands in the air. “Hallelujah!”

“AJ looked ready to kill this morning,” Courtney said. “He went straight to the mansion to confront his grandfather.” Her mouth twisted in a slight grimace. “I suppose I don’t have the influence on him that you do with Jason.”

Elizabeth winced, but shook it off. “He must have talked to Lila, because Edward showed up at Kelly’s. I’m not sure if he thought I could make peace with Jason or he could talk me out of mentioning any of it at a custody hearing, but I told him no way.”

“Even if you wanted to leave it out,” Gia said, “Alexis isn’t going to let this slide. She’d use it against AJ as a sign the Q’s are demonic, but yeah, there’s no way this isn’t going to be a thing.”

“It’s insane. How did he think Michael was going to keep this to himself?” Courtney asked with another sigh. “I hate that Edward might have messed with AJ’s chances, but you’re right. This is a mark against the Quartermaines.”

“They’re never more dangerous than when they’re trying to help,” Elizabeth said with a rueful smile. She grimaced. “Damn it. Why does he have to be here tonight?”

Zander emerged from a clump of men that had been at the pool table. He grabbed a chair from another table, turned it around and straddled it. “Slumming it tonight, ladies?”

“Who asked you to sit down?” Gia demanded, but Zander ignored her, focusing his gaze on Elizabeth who met his eyes dead on. She wasn’t intimidated by him.

She could take care of herself, and moreover, this was Jake’s. The bartender had given them a friendly wave when they’d arrived, and the bar itself was full of men who worked for Sonny. She’d like to think after all the problems Zander had had at his job lately, he’d show some common sense.

But clearly that was too much to hope for as Zander’s eyes narrowed. “You talk to your boyfriend lately?”

She lifted one eyebrow. “Why? You looking to pass another message to him? I’m not interested.”

“Yeah, I didn’t think so.” Zander smirked. “He’s not walking around like a man who’s satisfied. Maybe Gia’s more his speed.”

“Are you kidding me right now?” Gia demanded.

“I mean, I merely suggested yesterday that maybe he needed to get laid,” Zander continued, ignoring her. “And he nearly put me through a wall.”

“I wish he’d throw you over a cliff,” Courtney muttered.

“I wondered what those bruises were from,” Elizabeth said sweetly as she gestured toward the dark marks at Zander’s neck. “I heard you weren’t measuring up at work.”

He narrowed his eyes. “Yeah, well, maybe if Jason was getting what he needed at home, he wouldn’t be so bitchy at work.” He tilted his head, a wicked light in his eyes. “Or maybe you’re too frigid.”

Elizabeth fisted her hands in her lap, her blood beginning to simmer.

“Zander, you should probably go,” Courtney said. She leaned away from the table, looking in a different direction. “I think maybe—”

“Yeah, Emily told me you had a hang up about sex,” Zander continued, leaning in. “I guess no one can measure up to that first time—”

“Oh, that is it—” Gia got to her feet, but Elizabeth had already beat her to it. She picked up her glass and without even blinking, tossed it in his face.

Zander scowled and grabbed Gia’s beer.

Elizabeth gasped as the cold liquid splashed her face. Without one more thought, she lunged to her feet and launched herself across the table, tackling Zander and clawing at his face with her nails.

Gia rushed in to help, but the bar had already exploded. Men were trying to separate them, jostling each other. One man took exception to a bump from another, punched him in the face, then had a chair cracked over his head by someone else from the guy’s group.

Courtney neatly sidestepped the whole thing and moved a chair out of Jason’s away, as he closed the last distance between him and the melee at the table.

She’d spied him several minutes earlier—and after all, hadn’t she warned Zander to leave?

Elizabeth felt herself being lifted up by the waist and kicked out wildly until she realized it was Jason. He set her down next to Courtney, grabbed Zander by the throat and lifted him up as well.

“When the hell did he get here?” Elizabeth demanded, wiping blood from her nose. Courtney winced, then bit her lip as she watched Jason drag Zander towards the back of the bar.

“Uh, where’s he taking him?” Courtney asked.

Gia joined them, holding her hand to her cheek. “Fucking wastes of space,” she snarled. “Someone punched me in the face.”

“I better go out there before Jason kills him,” Elizabeth managed before taking off. After a moment, Gia and Courtney followed.

Jake’s: Back Alley

But Jason wasn’t going to kill Zander Smith. He didn’t know why Zander had thrown the beer at Elizabeth, but when he had, he’d seen red and didn’t quite remember closing the distance between the stairs and the brawl.  Fucker was lucky Jason didn’t separate his head from his body.

Though it felt good to finally be using his fists against Zander’s face the way he’d always visualized, Jason saw the back door open out of the corner of his eye. Elizabeth and her friends piled into the alley, followed by Jake.

When he was sure Zander wouldn’t be able to get back up and do any more damage, Jason let him slide to the ground, landing on his back, coughing up. His face was streaked with grime and dirt from the alley, along with scratches from Elizabeth and Gia’s nails—and blood from the broken nose he’d made sure Zander would suffer.

He’d seen the scumbag punch Elizabeth in the face. Zander Smith was lucky to be walking away with his ability to breathe intact.

Jason planted his motorcycle boot on Zander’s chest and leaned down. “You get up and you go away,” he told him in a low voice. “The next time I see you, I might not let you leave alive.”

Zander coughed again and spit to the side, the saliva mixed with blood. “Fucking bitch needs you to fight her battles—”

“Call me a bitch again!” Elizabeth snarled, but Gia grabbed her elbow to keep her from striding forward. “I don’t need anyone to take care of me. I knocked you on your ass, you piece of shit—”

“Who are you and what did you do with Elizabeth?” Courtney hissed.

“Get up and go away,” Jason told him again. “Don’t look back. You’re done here.” He stepped back.

Zander stumbled to his feet and spat again. “You don’t get to decide that,” he snarled, but he didn’t press the point. He disappeared down the alley. Jason turned to the quartet at the back door.

“Just wanted to be sure you wouldn’t kill him,” Jake said blandly. “I’ll go in and turn on the sprinklers.”

Elizabeth was breathing hard from the exertion of the fight, her pulse was racing as she watched Jason stand several feet away, breathing just as hard, his muscular chest rising up and down beneath the black t-shirt he wore.

“We should—” Gia grabbed Courtney by the arm and yanked her through the door.

“Should we leave them alone?” Courtney asked. “He looked pretty angry—”

“Girl, those were mating pheromones,” Gia told her. “Let’s help Jake clear out the bar.”

“Um, we weigh like a hundred pounds,” Courtney replied, but followed her friend. “I don’t think we’re going to be a lot of help.”

Back in the alley, Jason and Elizabeth just continued to stare at one another. Should she go inside? Say something? But her throat refused to produce sound and her feet were glued to the sidewalk.

He strode forward then, slid his hand around her neck and drew her up on her toes. And then he kissed her.

She’d been kissed before—by Lucky, mostly. Once, uncomfortably by Nikolas. A few times on dates with Gia’s annoying friends—but never like this. He consumed her. The world around her melted away, and the only thing she knew was the taste of his mouth, the slight tang of beer as his tongue slid past her lips. The way his hands felt as they slid beneath the thin camisole she wore and touched her skin, scorching a trail up her back.

She could feel the cool stone of the building behind her as he backed her against it, taking his lips from hers in order to kiss her jaw, taste the skin at her collarbone, the nip of his teeth at her throat. It was everything she’d ever thought it might be, but somehow more. Everything was brighter, more vibrant.

A bottle smashed somewhere nearby and Elizabeth jerked away, drawn back to reality by the sound. She pushed Jason back a little, suddenly uncomfortable with how fast and…how consuming the moment had been.

His fingers touched the swelling at her cheek. “You’re going to have a black eye,” he murmured, with none of the aggression he’d shown just moments earlier. “I should have hit him harder.”

“I’m pretty sure he’ll have scars from me and Gia,” Elizabeth replied with a sauciness she hadn’t felt in months. “I appreciate the assist, but I had it under control.”

“I know.” He grinned then, stepping back, giving her some space to cool down. “I just finally had a good excuse to kick his ass. You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.”

She knew her own smile must be as wide. God, Gia and Courtney had been right. She needed this electric feeling, this—sensation of being alive. She could feel all her nerve endings standing on end. “I have a pretty decent idea.”

He tipped his head toward the door. “I should go in, make sure Jake cleared the bar. You need a ride home?”

“Even if I didn’t,” Elizabeth said, arching a brow, “I’ll take one.”

Port Charles Harbor

It was just after dawn when a yacht sailed into the harbor as some of the locals were beginning their morning shift in the warehouses that lined the docks.

It had left Caracas, Venezuela two weeks earlier and had initially been scheduled to arrive the week before. But a storm off the coast of Massachusetts had delayed its northward progress, and traffic down the St. Lawrence River from the Atlantic had been congested now spring had arrived and wealthy residents were taking their own pleasure cruises from the Great Lakes to the ocean.

The yacht sliced through the murky blue water of the Elm Street Pier and slid into a slip that had been reserved for the summer.  Its crew set down the anchor, and some of workers at a nearby warehouse part gaped at the large vessel. Yachts were common in Port Charles, and wealth was not a new sight—they had their own island just outside the harbor complete with a Gothic mansion.

But this yacht was unusually large, with swarthy Columbian crew, and a name scrawled in Spanish across the bow, La Venganza. Some of the dock workers who spoke the language remarked on naming one’s boat after revenge, but everyone knew rich people didn’t have much imagination.

Several hours later, a man strolled out to the bow of the boat where the pier met Elm Street. He had a decent view of the harbor and, in particular, Pier 52. He lit a cigar and took a long pull, enjoying the bitter, smoky taste as it rolled down his throat.

“Let the games begin,” he murmured, before turning to meet with his first business associate, his grin wide and enthusiastic. “Ah, Senore Roscoe, thank you for meeting with me…”

I don’t know where I am
I don’t know what I’ve done
I just go over it and over it again and again and again
I can’t sleep at night
I can’t breathe
– Numb, Airborne Toxic Event

---

Friday, May 3, 2002

Corinthos Penthouse: Living Room

Sonny scowled, closing the folder of a business plan from Benny he’d intended to ignore anyway. He rose to his feet. “The little punk said what?”

Jason’s expression was tight, the muscles in his shoulders bunched with an unleashed fury. The pragmatic side of Sonny’s brain was relieved Jason hadn’t strangled Zander in broad daylight in front of witnesses when their peace was fragile.

But most of him wished Zander was lying at the bottom of the cold dark Port Charles Harbor. He’d been right to hold him back, right to test him. Goddamn bastard.

“One little setback and this is how he reacts?” Sonny shook his head. “Hothead. No goddamn common sense. Instead of doubling down, trying to prove himself, he mouths off.” He crossed the room the mini bar, but poured himself a glass of water instead of the bourbon he wanted.

He’d found himself turning to liquor more often than not, and while he rarely drank to excess, it struck him as a crutch he couldn’t afford.

He turned back to Jason. “You warn Elizabeth that Zander’s on the warpath? I don’t want him harassing her.”

“I talked to her.” Jason waited a minute. “I had Francis give me a guy to hang out at Kelly’s when Elizabeth works. That’s where Zander would likely catch her. She can handle herself, but—”

“He’s been warned,” Sonny cut in. “He shouldn’t need another damn warning. He shouldn’t have needed on in the first place. Every man in the organization knows—” He stopped, took a breath. “Jason, you know that anyone who’s been around for a few years, they think Elizabeth is—”

“I know.” Jason looked away, but Sonny caught the faint hint of red at his cheeks. “They still think I was—that winter I was shot—”

“When Nikolas Cassadine announced it at the Christmas party, after the bomb in her studio—when it became clear you were staying there—” Sonny tilted his head. “After I put a guard on her after you left. We never made it clear she wasn’t—” He paused. “What I’m telling you is, Jason, that I can talk to Francis, to Johnny. They can spread the word discreetly. If you want it known that she’s not—”

“Would it matter?” Jason asked. He met Sonny’s eyes, then shifted away. “If—if we say anything, it just draws more attention to her. We don’t go after women. It shouldn’t matter who they are. If he’s talking about Elizabeth that way—can you imagine how he’d treat the women who work at the clubs Nico wants him to run?”

“Yeah.” Sonny exhaled slowly, taking note of the fact Jason had declined to clarify Elizabeth’s status. She would remain linked with Jason unless they changed it. That relationship would carry weight with most of their men. And might prove dangerous to those who would use it against them. “We’ll send him a message. And those who work with Nico in general.”

He crossed to his desk, picked up the receiver. “Right now, Zander collects money for Nico. He doesn’t do any of the physical work, but he keeps the rest of the guys in line, particularly for some of the more lucrative bookies. He’s done with that now. I want him back on muscle. Any trust I had is gone now, and I don’t reward dumb fucks.”

“He’s gonna be pissed about that,” Jason said. “Might make it worse.”

“There were witnesses that heard him go after a woman under my protection. Mock you, challenge your authority. I don’t give a shit about Zander’s personal feelings. He wants to come at me? Let him.” Sonny scoffed. “He won’t. He’ll keep coming at weaker targets because he doesn’t have the balls. You let him live once. He crosses us again, we’re not so nice the next time.”

Oasis: Back Office

“God damn it, Zander.” Nico pounded his fist on the table. “You got a fucking death wish, you little shit?”

Zander scowled, slumping in his chair. “What, I’m fired now?” He expected no less after Jason Morgan had nearly strangled him. He’d known it was suicide to insult Elizabeth to his face, but he couldn’t resist the temptation—he knew insulting that bitch would crack Morgan’s legendary cool.

But it hadn’t. Oh, yeah, Morgan had shoved him against the wall, but he’d done with a calm expression. As if he were swatting a fucking fly. Fucker. He hated that bastard. He’d pissed Jason off, but not enough to lose it.

“No,” Nico retorted. “But you’re back to cracking heads and busting knees.” He huffed. “I’m gonna have to find someone else to take over for me when I go to Vegas,” he told Lenny. “I thought this fucker could be fixed—I thought if I gave Sonny some time, but no.” His eyes were like laser slicing through him when he looked back at Zander. “You got a thing for this bitch? Is that why you can’t keep away?”

“What?” Zander demanded. “No!”

“I got eyes on you, you moron. I know you went after her at that diner you live at. I know you harassed her—that’s why Sonny called last week.” He lit a cigarette. “You didn’t tell me that happened.”

“It wasn’t important—”

“You ended your career, you dumb shit. You fucked up your life over a whore so I hope you at least fucked her first,” Nico muttered. He sucked in a long drag, then exhaled, the wispy smoke disappearing into the dimly lit room. “Is that what this is about? You wanted her, she wanted Morgan?”

“I don’t—” Zander stopped, took a deep breath. “No,” he said, a bit more calmly. “I don’t care about Elizabeth Webber. I shouldn’t have said anything about her. Or to her.”

“Little late for that.” He looked at Lenny. “Call Ollie. Tell him to send me Paulie.” Nico tipped the ash of his cigarette into a ceramic ash tray at his side. “You can go work for Ollie. Paulie will take your place here. He’s due to move up.”

“Damn it, Nico—”

“If I want Corinthos to give me the go ahead on Vegas,” Nico said, his tone tight, “I gotta toe the fucking line. I already put my neck out for you once, you piece of shit. I ain’t doing it twice.” He leaned back, considered him a long moment. “You play your cards right, Smith, you let Morgan cool off, and you stay away from this woman—maybe when I get to Vegas, I can convince Sonny to send you out to me. But get your head together. Women aren’t worth losing money and power.”

It hadn’t been about a woman. Nothing to do with her. Just what she represented. Who she was to Jason Morgan. The man had everything, but hell if he’d let anyone else get a toe up in this world.

One day, someone was going to put a bullet between Jason’s eyes, and Zander was going to raise a toast in celebration.

Gia and Elizabeth’s Apartment: Living Room

Courtney refilled her glass of Moscato—her third of the evening, and she had a feeling it wouldn’t be the last. “I could learn to hate the Quartermaines.” She could still remember the way they’d looked at her, judged her. Found her wanting. They didn’t care much for AJ, but they sure as hell didn’t think she was good enough for him all the same.

“I’d ask what Jason thinks about all of this,” Gia said, swirling the liquid in her wine glass as she reclined on the sofa, “but I’m not an idiot. You haven’t told him yet.”

Elizabeth snorted, curling up at the other end of the sofa. “I tell Jason that Edward Quartermaine is harassing Michael at school, and I won’t have to worry about being in the middle of a custody battle. I’ll be bailing Jason out of jail for assault and battery.” She blinked. “You think he’d get bail?”

“Well, as long as he doesn’t murder the dumb bastard,” Gia considered, “I think he’d be in clear. They usually only withhold bail for serious felonies.” She lifted her glass in a mock salute. “You start sleeping with him, you’re really going to have start boning up on your criminal law.”

“Haha,” Elizabeth muttered darkly.

“She didn’t deny it this time,” Courtney pointed out to Gia. “Good sign, I think.”

“I don’t see the point in wasting my breath.” Elizabeth sighed and set her wine glass on the coffee table. “I should tell him.”

“Uh, like yesterday,” Gia said. She flicked her fingers at Courtney. “This one is going to tell her husband, I’m sure.”

Elizabeth turned stricken eyes to Courtney. “You’re going to tell AJ?”

Courtney swallowed and shrugged. “I kind of have to, don’t I? I mean, AJ had a huge fight with his grandfather a few days ago after the will reading. And if you’re telling Jason, I think AJ should get a chance to defend himself. What if Jason thinks AJ put his grandfather up to it?”

“Did he?” Gia raised her eyebrows.

“No!”

“Courtney.” Elizabeth bit her lip. “I just—I want to do the right thing. Maybe I shouldn’t say anything to anyone. You don’t tell AJ, I won’t tell Jason—”

“Well, that’s just a stupid reaction.” Gia huffed. “Elizabeth, you have to tell Jason. He’s Michael’s legal guardian, and Edward Quartermaine is screwing with the kid’s mind. I mean, I’m sure he means well, but trying to get in good with the kid behind everyone’s back just screams manipulative.”

“I know, I know. I just—” Elizabeth pursed her lips. “I don’t know. It’s been…almost normal. Michael was starting to bounce back a bit. When I tell Jason, his first instinct is going to be to go after Edward. I don’t want that. I don’t want Jason to have to deal with that. He has enough grief with the Quartermaines.”

“It’s cute how concerned she is about a guy who’s not her sex toy,” Gia told Courtney. She looked back at Elizabeth. “Listen. You can’t not say anything. You’re gonna feel guilty. And if you keep quiet, Edward Quartermaine is just going to keep going to Michael’s school. They won’t turn him way—too much money. Too much influence. He’s gonna keep confusing and upsetting Michael, and eventually, it’s going to come out that this is happening, and that you knew.”

Elizabeth dipped her head. “Yeah. Yeah, I know. I just—” She bit her lip. “I don’t know. It’s stupid to think I could stay out of this—I just don’t want to fall into bad habits.”

“Bad habits?” Courtney echoed, but Gia was shaking her head.

“You know telling someone is the right thing. You know it, because you’ve always been a goody-two shoes—”

“Oh, shut up—”

“Gia,” Courtney tried to break in, because she didn’t like the tone in either woman’s voice or their flushed cheeks. But it was if she wasn’t there.

“So, you wanting to remain silent is about this stick you have up your ass about Jason. You think I haven’t noticed you pretending you’re going to keep him at arm’s length? You’re doing the same bullshit now you did last year, only you don’t have Lucky to blame anymore.”

Elizabeth shot to her feet, her eyes dark with anger. “What the hell does that mean?”

“It means,” Gia began as she carefully got to her feet, “that you’re still telling yourself you don’t want Jason that way. You’re being his friend, but you’re sending the same damn signals you sent last year. I watched you when he came to see you a few days ago. He’s giving you the same looks, and you’re not shutting it down—”

“That’s not true—”

“What the hell are you so afraid of?” Gia shot back.

“Gia, come on,” Courtney murmured, standing. She didn’t want them to fight like this. She touched Gia’s arm. “Don’t—”

“You have no right—” Elizabeth stopped, and closed her eyes. “Gia—” Her voice broke, and so Gia’s face softened.

“I don’t know how we ended up being friends or roommates,” Gia continued, “but here we are. I don’t want to be like the idiots who pushed you at Lucky last year. That’s not what I’m trying to do, Elizabeth. I just—” She bit her lip. “You were miserable last year going after that modeling job, dating Lucky. You were pretending to be someone you’re not. When you left Lucky, when we decided to do this new life thing together, what did you tell me?”

“I—” Elizabeth sighed and sank onto the sofa. She closed her eyes. “That I didn’t want to pretend anymore. I didn’t want to be someone I wasn’t.”

Gia sat next to her. “If you really don’t want anything romantic with Jason, that’s fine. But you’re sitting here, contemplating not telling him something about Michael you know he has to know, and you’re doing it because you can’t pretend when you’re with him. As long as you don’t see him, you can play this game.”

“Elizabeth,” Courtney said, a bit uneasy. “I don’t know everything that happened with Lucky, and I don’t expect you to tell me. I just—I think Jason should know Edward is around Michael. I’m going to tell AJ, so he can do something about it. Jason and AJ want to put Michael first. We should help them do that.”

“I know.” Elizabeth lifted her wine glass to her lips. “Hand me my cell phone.” She looked at Gia. “That’s why we ended up friends. You’re the only one who ever called me on my bullshit. Once that stopped scaring me, I realized how important it is.” Her lips twitched. “Bitch.”

“Skank.” Gia handed the silver phone over to her. “I won’t wait up.”

Brownstone: Front Step

When Jason pulled up, Elizabeth was sitting at the top of the steps.

“I’m sorry to call you so late,” she said, shifting a bit to the side to make room.

“It’s okay,” Jason responded as he climbed the steps to take a seat next to her.  “You said something was wrong.”

“I wrestled with telling you this for a lot of reasons,” Elizabeth said. She twisted so that she was half facing him, her back against the cool stone. “Most of them aren’t important, but I mostly just…I know it’s going to make everything worse. You’re going to be so angry…”

“Elizabeth…” He leaned forward, trying to capture her eyes but she kept them down, looking at her lap. “Did something happen? Are you okay?”

“It’s not about me,” Elizabeth replied. “It’s…I pick Michael up during the week. Two days, sometimes three. Today, he was in a bit of a mood. Not a bad one, just…quiet. He’s been quiet since Carly…but it was different today. It took some prying—Jason, Edward arranged for Michael to come to the headmaster’s office.”

Jason sat up, his shoulders tensing. “He harassed Michael at school?”

“He told Michael it was going to be their little secret. His way of getting to know him before Michael came to live with them. So, he wouldn’t be so scared.” Elizabeth shook her head, her voice thickening. “When Michael said he wanted to stay with his grandmother, Edward told him it would be easier at the mansion. More family. It wouldn’t be such a burden to look after him.”

“A fucking burden?” Jason repeated. He lunged to his feet. “He told Michael he was a burden to Bobbie?”

“Jason…” Elizabeth stood. “I know you’re angry, and I’m sorry. I just—you needed to know this was happening. I didn’t tell Bobbie yet. I wanted to see how you wanted to deal with it—”

Deal with it? He was going to go to that damn house and throw Edward Quartermaine into the fucking lake. What the hell was he thinking? “Carly’s only been gone for a few weeks,” Jason managed through a clenched jaw. “He couldn’t wait—”

“Jason…” Elizabeth sighed and wrapped her arms around herself. “I know, and I know you think confronting him is the right thing to do, but—”

“It won’t solve anything,” he muttered. “It’ll make me feel better, but that’s not the point.” He sat back down and dragged his hands through his hair. “What did you tell Michael?”

“I told him that Bobbie loved him, that you loved him. That he was home with her and no one was taking him anywhere.” Elizabeth dropped next to him. “I know I probably stepped out of line, I just didn’t want him worrying that he might—he’s been through so much during this last year. Leaving Sonny’s, losing him out of his life. Coming here. Carly working, then when she died…he can’t handle more instability. He shouldn’t have to.” She hesitated. “I told Courtney and Gia. Courtney is telling AJ about it.”

“Why?” Jason demanded. “He probably put the old man up to it—” He looked away even as he said it.

“You know that’s not true,” Elizabeth murmured. “I don’t want to champion him because, well, I don’t know anything for sure, but if AJ were behind it, he wouldn’t send Edward as his emissary.”

“No,” Jason muttered. “He wouldn’t. He would have gone himself.” He waited a moment. “I’ll have to talk to Alexis again. I want her to be ready to challenge any suit they bring my way. Edward might not wait for AJ to file on his own.” He shook his head. “Michael’s staying with Bobbie. He’s not going anywhere near them—” He glanced over, then frowned. “What? You look like you want to say something.”

“Edward going behind everyone’s back—it looks bad for him. But if AJ wasn’t involved—that’s not going to change his custody case.” Elizabeth asked softly. She closed her eyes. “Jason. I hate this. I hate that I have to say this—but I think you’re running out of time to make a decision.”

Jason flinched. “AJ can’t be trusted. You said so yourself—”

“I know that,” Elizabeth said. “I just…I don’t know, Jason. Maybe you should talk to AJ. Come up with a third solution. I don’t want Michael to go through a custody hearing, have to talk to doctors and judge and watch you and AJ fight over him only for you to lose.”

“You want AJ to have Michael?” Jason demanded. “After everything he’s done—”

“I’m not saying that. And I’ve never said that,” Elizabeth retorted. “And I’m not in any position to judge anything anyone else does, okay? I don’t know. I just—I want what’s best for Michael. I’m just—” She bit her lip.

“Spit it out, Elizabeth.”

“I know all the reasons you don’t want AJ to have custody,” Elizabeth said finally. “And you know I agree with them. Jason, I’m just so scared that a judge isn’t going—he’s not going to take them seriously. If you and AJ fight this out, if you force a judge to rule—” She swallowed. “Jason…”

“I know.” He exhaled slowly, and looked away, looked straight ahead to the other row of brownstones across the street. “Thanks for telling me about AJ. I know—I know you’re not comfortable telling me anything Courtney says to you.”

“Well, I figured it was fair warning.”

Jason hesitated. “Why else?”

She blinked at him. “Why else what?”

“You said you struggled with not telling me for a lot of reasons,” he said slowly. “I can’t—I don’t think they were all about Michael.”

“Jason—” She bit her lip. “No, I guess they weren’t.” She rubbed hands over her denim clad knees. “I just—I don’t want things to be like they were before. I want us to be friends, I do. I just—” She tilted her eyes to the sky. “I’m not sure we can be.”

He sucked in a sharp breath—he hadn’t expected that. “Elizabeth—” He exhaled slowly. “Why can’t we be friends?” he asked. He almost scowled at he saw a tiny smile flit across her petite features. “What? What’s funny?”

“Nothing…it’s usually…I’m used to being the one asking that —” Elizabeth sighed. “Why were we friends in the first place?”

“What?” He lifted his brows. “When? Last year?”

“Ever. You felt sorry for me and gave me a ride. How did…” She looked at her fingernails, painted some sort of dark shade he couldn’t make out by the light of the street lamps. “How did that turn into everything else?”

“I—” Jason hesitated. He’d never really thought about how they’d become so close. They just…they just were. Or had been. “I don’t know. I guess you were just…you were someone I could talk to.”

“Maybe it was that morning I found you in the snow. Maybe that’s when it changed.” She sighed. “I always felt like I took advantage of you. Like…you were there because I saved your life once and you just…”

“We weren’t friends because I felt obligated,” Jason finished her thought. “That’s not what I do. Yeah, after that winter—after you dragged me to your studio and forced soup down my throat, sure, if you’d needed something, I would have done it. You saved my life. But that’s not why—” Not why he’d been so scared the night the bomb was in her studio. Why he’d felt as torn about cutting things off after that…

Why saying goodbye a few weeks later had hurt so much.

“Why does it matter?” he said instead. “Do you need to know why I care about you?”

“Because I did take advantage of you last year,” Elizabeth said.

He shook his head. “I don’t see it that way—”

“Oh, come on…” She rolled her eyes. “Don’t—don’t do that. Don’t pretend I didn’t—” She bit her lips. “Anyone else would have called me a tease or something worse—”

“I’m not anyone else.” He took her chin in his hand, forcing her to look at him. “And you don’t get to tell me what happened last year. I was there, and I know what you were going through—”

“Jason—”

“And you can’t keep punishing yourself. Is that this is about?” He released her and got to his feet. “We can’t be friends because of what happened?”

She stood. “Because there’s no place in my life for you.”

He took the hit and didn’t flinch. “If that’s true, Elizabeth, then I can respect that. But I don’t believe you.”

“You don’t get to tell me how to feel,” she shot back, echoing words he’d once spoken to her. “I can’t go back. I can’t do any of that again—”

“Any of what?” he challenged, feeling the frustration crawl up his throat. “Damn it, Elizabeth, what did I do—”

“I’m never going to be broken again, do you get that?” Her voice cracked, a tear slid down her cheek, iridescent in the pale streetlight. As soon as the words left her mouth, her shoulders slumped, the anger slid out of her posture.

Jason closed his mouth, because he didn’t know how to respond to that. How to argue with that. He didn’t even know why he was pushing this except— “I—”

Elizabeth sighed and scrubbed her hands over her face. “I’m sorry. I don’t—you didn’t—I did it to myself. I let people tell me how to feel, how to live. I let them direct my life. I’ve worked my ass off for the last five months to be the person I was supposed to be. I can’t…I can’t go back. I can’t be that person again. After the rape, after losing Lucky, after the wedding—I keep starting my life over again. I can’t do it again. I just can’t.”

“I’m not asking you to. I just…” Wanted to see her. Be around her. Take her to the cliff roads. “I just—”

“But it hurts too much…” A tear slid down her cheek, glinting in the dim light. “It all hurts, and I can’t stand it. I hate this. I hate that when I see you, it’s like nothing has changed—”

He took her by the elbow and drew her in closer. “Elizabeth—”

“Even the way you say my name—” Her voice broke and she dipped her head, leaned into him. “I just want to be…” She trailed off, as if she didn’t know how to finish that.

“I want you to be whoever you want to be,” Jason told her, running his hand from her elbow to the top of her shoulder then back again. “You’re still putting pressure on yourself. If that’s because of me—”

“It’s because of me…” Elizabeth sighed again and stepped back. “I don’t know. Maybe I’m making things into a huge deal. What did you used to say? A solution doesn’t have to be complicated to be right? Maybe…I just have to stop.”

“There’s no law that says we have to do anything or be anything,” Jason told her. He tipped her face, so their eyes met. “You keep telling me you’re a different person now.”

“A better one,” she said with conviction. “And maybe it’s time I show you.”

He tilted his head toward the street. “How about a ride?”

“Perfect.” As they started towards his bike, she asked, “What are you going to do about Michael? About Edward?”

He sighed, as he handed her the helmet strapped on the back of his bike. “I don’t know. I suppose I’ll call Alexis in the morning to see what she recommends. I might want to go…” Yell at someone, break something… “But it won’t solve anything. I have to do what’s good for Michael.”

Though if Edward making this move at Michael’s school was the reason Elizabeth had finally started to tear down the walls between them, well, maybe he might even find room to be grateful to the old bastard.

Some people out there
Are always talkin’ around
Seems they’re never really happy
Unless they’re puttin’ somebody down
You know the thing they fear the most
Is that someone’s gonna see right through
Their thin disguise and made-up lies
It’s sad, but true
– Heard Ya Talkin’, Jeremy Kay

---

Thursday, May 2, 2002

Queen of Angels: Chapel

It was strange to stand with Bobbie and Jason as part of the receiving line, but Bobbie had asked Elizabeth to stay with her when Lucas had balked at attending. He’d elected to stay home and hang out with Michael, and Bobbie had thought it would be the better use of his time. So, Elizabeth stood there next to Bobbie as people offered their condolences.

She wondered when she saw the large crowd how many of them were there because they’d genuinely liked Carly—and how many had attended out of love for Bobbie?

There was a tense moment as she spied AJ and Courtney in the line. She saw Jason’s muscles bunch—could feel the irritation, the annoyance rising off him as if it were steam rising from a pot of boiling water.

“Bobbie,” Courtney said with a smile, as she came to the older woman first. She leaned in and kissed Bobbie’s cheek. “I’m so sorry for your loss. Carly and I didn’t know each other well, but she was so full of energy. I’ll miss her drama at the diner.”

“Thank you,” Bobbie managed, as Elizabeth gave her friend a grateful smile. The blonde’s words had been some of the few genuine offers of sympathy. Many likely thought Bobbie was better off without the tornado of Carly Corinthos.

“Bobbie, if there’s anything you need,” AJ said, as he carefully avoided looking to Bobbie’s right. “You call me.”

“Yeah, anytime you need me to cover,” Courtney said to Elizabeth. She bit her lip and looked at Jason. Good manners won over her innate shyness as she offered her hand to Jason, who accepted it. “Elizabeth has told me so much about you and Carly. I’m sorry for your loss.”

“Thanks,” Jason said. Courtney hesitated then stepped forward, moving past the line.

AJ cleared his throat as he considered his brother. Elizabeth could hardly breathe. Surely—they wouldn’t cause a scene here. But AJ was a Quartermaine, an unpredictable breed at best.

“No matter our difficulties,” AJ said finally, “I know Carly mattered to you.” Which, Elizabeth supposed, seemed the safest way to describe the strange relationship his brother had had with AJ’s ex-wife. “Losing a friend is never easy.”

He offered his hand, and Elizabeth could feel the eyes of everyone in the immediate area drawing in a collected breath.

But not Elizabeth. She knew Jason better than that and knew he’d let AJ set the tone for this scene. Whatever trouble they had, she hoped Jason would see the sincerity in the older man’s eyes.

So, she wasn’t surprised when Jason accepted the hand and shook it. “Thank you,” he replied, his voice devoid of any expression.

AJ and Courtney moved on, the crisis averted. Elizabeth sucked in another breath when she saw Edward and Lila at the end of the line—the last Quartermaines in the room.

Alan and Monica had elected not to come, Bobbie said, having offered their condolences at another time. Ned had been through already with Alexis, and his sympathy had been genuine, his interactions with Jason civil, but Ned had always been the most mature member of the family.

“Don’t worry,” Jason murmured to Elizabeth as his grandparents drew closer. “Grandmother won’t let him start anything.”

True enough, Lila’s gentle presence had forestalled any attempt Edward might have made to antagonize Jason. There had only been a stray comment about family being important, and Edward being willing to do whatever was good for that family, but Elizabeth paid little attention to it.

Bobbie thanked Elizabeth profusely for standing by her at the viewing and in the receiving line, but then she left with Felicia and Mac in order to head to the reception at the Brownstone.

Elizabeth had driven to the church with Gia, but her roommate had had to leave immediately after the service for a study group session, which left Elizabeth with the option to either walk to work or…

“Do you have a ride?” Jason asked.

She had a feeling Gia might have had an ulterior motive when making plans to abandon to her at the church. She’d known Elizabeth was scheduled to work, that Bobbie wouldn’t be able to take her home. She sighed and looked at him. “No, I—I’m supposed to be at Kelly’s—Penny and Don have been there all day—”

“I’ll take you,” Jason told her. “I’m in the parking lot.” And because she could think of no reason to refuse that didn’t sound insane and petty, she nodded.

They left the shadowy anteroom of the church and moved into the brilliant sunshine of the early May afternoon. Elizabeth shaded her eyes with one hand as she rummaged one-handed in her purse for her sunglasses.  “I already miss winter,” she muttered.

“There’s sun in the winter,” Jason said blandly as he touched the small of her back to propel her toward the parking lot. She ignored the tingles of his warm skin as they brushed the thin fabric of her black dress and increased her speed, leaving those fingers behind

“Well, if you’re going to be literal,” she began as they passed through the thin black fence, but she cursed herself when they all but crashed into a trio of people she’d been trying to avoid.

Damn it. She was usually more aware of her surroundings, but no—today of all days—

“Well, I’m not surprised to find you sniffing after her already,” Lucky said, ignoring Elizabeth and directing his disgust at Jason. “It’s only been, what? Five minutes since we broke up?”

“Oh, for Christ’s…” Elizabeth huffed and shoved the sunglasses up over her forehead. Even if they were only in the parking lot, this was still a church, she reminded herself, and Sarah was still her sister. So, she plastered a smile on her face and took a deep breath. “I didn’t see you three inside.”

“We caught Bobbie before the ceremony,” Nikolas said, his expression dark with disappointment. Likely in her, for her choice of friends. Jackass. “I thought it was best we didn’t cause a scene.”

She didn’t have a damn clue what kind of scene they might have caused, so she ignored his comment and started past them.

“Lizzie, do you need a ride somewhere?” Sarah asked, even as she wound her arm through Lucky’s. Elizabeth blinked at it for a moment, trying to figure out why the movement bothered her so damn much.

“Let’s just go,” she finally said to Jason. “It’s like talking to a brick wall.”

“Lizzie, you’re not going to get on that bike!” Sarah protested as Jason and Elizabeth rounded the trio and closed the short distance to the motorcycle. “You’re in a dress!”

“Cool it, Sarah. You know there’s no talking to your sister,” Lucky said, bitterness lacing his retort. “Why aren’t you with my aunt?”

Elizabeth ignored them as Jason handed her the helmet and straddled the bike. Don’t give in, don’t give in. Don’t look at them—

“You really know how to cut and run when it gets tough, don’t you?” Lucky managed to call over the engine. Stunned by this attack, Elizabeth looked at him then, seeing the misery, the anger in his expression.  What the hell was his problem?

“Elizabeth?”

She turned back and looked at Jason, his brow lifted. “If you want to stay,” he began, using a resigned tone that she remembered too well.

And she remembered all the times she’d walked away from Jason and stayed with Lucky. Every single mistake she’d made. Jason was hurting today—he had said goodbye to a friend, he was facing a difficult custody battle. And now he was looking at her with that same understanding.

Maybe she didn’t intend to pursue her feelings for him, but she’d be damned if she let him for one more minute think that she was contemplating leaving him for Lucky.

“Can you take the long way to Kelly’s?” she asked, climbing behind Jason and tucking in her skirt so it wouldn’t fly up. “Penny and Don can wait. I want to be anywhere but here.”

Brownstone: Kitchen

The reception had waned by the time Jason arrived—Bobbie was in her kitchen, picking at a sandwich he was sure someone had put in front of her.

With the memorial done, Bobbie had nothing left to plan. There was no next step, nothing to focus on. He worried that she might fall apart now.

But she surprised him with a genuine, if sad, smile as he pulled out a chair to sit with her. “I wondered if you would stop by once people had started to leave.”

“I took Elizabeth to Kelly’s,” he told her. And had stayed for lunch to be sure that if Zander stopped by, he’d be there to give him a warning in person. He hadn’t, and Jason had felt a mixture of relief and disappointment. He wouldn’t mind having Zander’s face to punch today.

“Oh…” Bobbie leaned back. “I didn’t even think—she drove with Gia, but Gia had to leave.” She pressed a hand to her forehead. “I should have made sure—”

“No one expects you to take care of everyone. Elizabeth is an adult.”

“I know, but…” Bobbie sighed. “I just…it struck me as I sat here with my dearest friends in the world. No one misses her.”

Jason blinked. “Bobbie—”

“No one genuinely misses Carly’s presence save for you, me, Michael, and perhaps Sonny, but he holds his grief inside. Everyone else?” Bobbie looked away, toward the backyard where Jason realized he could hear a rumble of voices and the thump of a basketball hitting a hoop. “They feel sorry for me, but I imagine many of them think I’m better off.”

Jason started to protest, but found he couldn’t. Carly had not endeared herself to many in her few years in Port Charles, and had actively sought to antagonize most. Her absence might even bring relief to some.

“I know people think Carly was destructive. Conniving. Manipulative. And she was.” Bobbie’s smile was warmer now. “She came by it naturally. I gave her away to give her a better life, but I wanted one for myself, and I did whatever I had to do to get the life I thought I deserved. I schemed. I lied. I had an affair and destroyed my marriage long before she came to town. Once I was past the shock, the sorrow that my child had not had a good life, I could see everything we had in common. Everything that I had passed to her.” She sighed and met Jason’s eyes. “I can only hope she’s found peace now.”

She rose and crossed to the coffee pot. “Can I make you some coffee?”

“Sure,” he said, because it would give her something to do and he could see she needed that now. “About Michael—”

“I hope you’re not angry with me,” Bobbie cut in as she filled the pot with water and turned it on. She looked at him. “It’s not that I don’t want him with you. I remember how good you were to him. I’ve always wished he was your son. It would have made everything easier.”

“But he’s not,” Jason murmured. “And wishing doesn’t take away the problem we have. I spoke with Elizabeth.”

“Oh.” Bobbie drew her brow together. “Oh. I forgot I had asked her—I feel awful about that. I know she doesn’t want to take sides—”

“I needed someone to be honest with me about AJ,” Jason said. “If Michael ends up—” He couldn’t articulate the possibility, so he just stopped. “Anyway, it’s not important. I just—I’m listening to what you and Alexis are telling me. I know the odds aren’t in my favor. I haven’t decided yet what to do. Elizabeth thinks we—that I have still have time.” He hesitated again because it wasn’t in his nature particularly to pry, but— “We ran into Lucky as we left.”

Her expression changed, distaste creeping in. “I’m sure that was pleasant,” she said, acid dripping from every word.

“She told me a little bit of what happened,” Jason continued. “I know that she left him at the altar, moved in here with Gia. I’m not—” He waited. “I don’t know what I’m asking. I guess I just—”

“You’ve noticed the changes.” Bobbie poured the coffee into a mug, then set it in front of him. She returned to her chair. “I’ve known Elizabeth since she moved to Port Charles. I can remember the brash, irresponsible teenager Aunt Ruby kept on at the diner even though she was pretty hopeless. She was flighty, vibrant, clever—”

Bobbie sighed. “Ruby always said she was reminded of me at that age. I wasn’t much older than Elizabeth when I—” She bit her lip and looked away. She didn’t have to clarify what she left unspoken. Jason knew she’d been a teenager when she’d started as a prostitute in Florida.

“Anyway.” Bobbie coughed, and continued, “Ruby kept her at the diner to keep an eye on her. She saw so much of herself, of me, in Elizabeth.” She tilted her head. “And then, one day, it was gone. All the promise, the bright shining light—extinguished in an instant.”

“I know she was…” He couldn’t say it, hated thinking it. He could remember Emily divulging the truth to him at the garage after Tom Baker had held them hostage in his studio, and while it had saddened him then—he hadn’t really understood it until he spent time with Elizabeth, had seen the scars the attack had left on her soul. It wasn’t abstract any longer, but a real horror that had happened to someone he cared about. “I know what happened to her.”

“I watched her battle back from that, putting herself together piece by piece. It was a struggle,” Bobbie admitted, “but I—I was so proud of her…for finding a new sense of herself. I could see the woman she was going to be emerging. The flightiness—her superficial nature—that had deepened into a bottomless well of compassion, of caring. I could see her shining again, and I could see my nephew shining with her. She didn’t just put herself back together that year, Jason, she kept my fractured family together and didn’t even know it. Lucky was going to leave Port Charles, but she kept him here. And he and Luke were able to patch things up.

“She used to tell me that Lucky fixed her,” Bobbie continued, a tear sliding down her cheek. “I could never understand why she wouldn’t see what she’d given him. Just when I thought she’d battled herself completely back—” Her throat closed. “Well, you were there the night of the fire. You know what she lost. What never came home.”

“Bobbie—”

“The changes you see, the ones I’ve seen since January—” Bobbie cut in, shifting the topic back to the present. “I see that vibrancy returning, but she’s…” She bit her lip, frowning as if searching for the right words. “She’s guarded. In a way I haven’t seen in a long time. I worry that she’s so focused on protecting herself that…”

She looked at Jason. “I can’t tell you much about what happened with the wedding beyond the brainwashing. I think it was merely the final straw. Elizabet doesn’t like to speak about it. I know that she was unhappy before you left, that she was almost miserable in the months that followed.  I wasn’t sure getting married was the right idea, but Lucky had pushed for it, and Elizabeth seemed to…” Bobbie pursed her lips. “I don’t know. I can’t explain it. She seemed to swallow herself up and disappear entirely into Lucky. Until the wedding. And then she woke up.”

Bobbie shifted and leaned back. “Lucky was upset, Laura was beside herself—she’s been in denial about the boy who came home as much as anyone of us, but she put so much pressure on Elizabeth. If Elizabeth could just wait a bit longer, love him a bit more, maybe Lucky would be okay again. They both wanted me to talk to her, but I was relieved when she called off the wedding. Gia broke up with Nikolas at the same time. They asked to rent an apartment, they went back to school—” She lifted her hands. “And that’s what I know.”

And it told him very little, but he should have expected that. And what did he really want to know? That Lucky was out of her life? Did he want that to be the truth?

“If you care about her, Jason,” Bobbie said, softly, “then give her some time, some space. I would never call her delicate or fragile, but—”

He almost laughed at that and saw similar humor fill her dark eyes. “No, that’s definitely true. Bobbie—” He stopped when he couldn’t find the words to say. She leaned over and squeezed his hand.

“I think of her as part of my family,” she told him. “Just like you. I know you’ll do right by each other.” She rose to her feet. “I should call the hospital and check in.”

“Thanks, Bobbie.” Jason stood. “I should be getting to work anyway.”

Kelly’s: Dining Room

 

Elizabeth offered Sonny a sad smile as the mobster took a seat at the counter and flipped over his coffee cup. “Hey.”

“Hey.” He waited as she poured the thick, dark liquid into the porcelain mug. “Was it okay? No one made any scenes?”

“It was…” she murmured, searching for the right words as she returned the carafe to the hot plate. “It was quiet. Reserved.”

A small corner played at the corner of Sonny’s mouth. “She would have hated that.” He hesitated as he stirred a bit of sugar. “I think I thought…I really thought she’d show up to her own funeral.”

Because they hadn’t found a body. Because Carly would always be at the bottom of the lake. Trapped in her car. Her stomach swirled at the thought.

“It would be her style,” Elizabeth replied. “But not this time. No one showed up at their own funeral.” She smiled at him. “Not that it means anything. Lucky didn’t come to his either and…well…you know.”

“True enough.” Sonny sighed. “A funeral should feel more final,” he said after a moment. “Like closing a book and putting it on a shelf.  I can’t…” He shook his head slightly. “I can’t stop thinking about those cliffs. About Brenda’s accident at the same place.”

“Sonny…”

“I worry for Jason,” her friend said, cutting her off. “The Quartermaines…they’re just lying in wait.” He grimaced, lines shadowing the dimples in his cheeks. “I should have adopted Michael. I just…”

“It made perfect sense at the time.” Elizabeth closed a hand over his. “Carly started a new life. No one saw this coming. And it’s not like AJ has always been a prime candidate for fatherhood. It’s just…it’s bad timing, Sonny—”

“He’s not saying much about his chances in court, but I can imagine…”

“They’re not good.” Elizabeth sighed, dipping her head as she concentrated filling a sugar canister. “Sonny—”

“Jason mentioned you two don’t see each often,” Sonny cut in. “Are you…are you mad at him?”

“Mad?” Elizabeth jerked her head up. “No. No, of course not. Why would I—God, it should be other way around, Sonny…” She sighed. If Jason had mentioned something to Sonny, it must be really be bothering him. “I just…all of that is behind me. That person. I made stupid decisions, I said and did awful things—”

“Elizabeth, you were in a difficult—” Sonny stopped and took a moment, as if gathering his thoughts. “I married Lily. You know this about me, right? My marriage to her.”

“I do—”

“I married her because…well, let’s just say it wasn’t my first choice.” He hesitated. “And I loved Brenda. I never stopped. I was going—I was going to leave Lily for Brenda, but then…Lily was pregnant. And I wanted to give that family—” He closed his eyes.

Hating that he was going back to that time in his head, Elizabeth winced. “Sonny, really—”

“I stayed with Lily out of obligation. Because I thought it was the right thing to do.” He paused. “And maybe it would have been okay. She would have been a good mother. I would have been faithful, loved my children. But it wouldn’t have been what either of us deserved.”

“I get it,” Elizabeth said before he could go on. “And I know I was with Lucky out obligation. I do—”

“You’ve got Jason wrapped up in all of that, Elizabeth. You made yourself miserable trying to be someone else, to want something else. And none of that had anything to do with Jason or how you two felt about each other.”

“That’s…” She closed her eyes. “It’s not just about trying…to be a better person, Sonny. I can’t…” Her throat thickened, and she could feel the pressure behind her eyes. “Yeah. It’s about last year. And how I hurt Jason. And how I want to get as far away from being that person as I can. But if it were just about that, I think I could…I could just…be okay.”

“It’s about fear,” Sonny murmured. “Fear that when you open to yourself to someone, they take a piece of you. And you never get it back. I get it.” He took a deep breath. “I don’t want to tell you how to feel or what to do about those feelings. You got enough of that from my former partner and his idiot son.”

Elizabeth laughed then as one tear slid down her cheek. She swiped at it. “I know, Sonny. I’m—I’m terrified that the next piece I give away…” She couldn’t quite articulate it, but he nodded.

“Yeah…” He dropped a fifty next to his empty coffee cup. “So, let’s just leave it at this. I think Jason needs a friend. Someone who will care about what happens to Michael as much as he does, but someone who won’t lie to him. Someone who has his best interests in heart.”

“I…” Elizabeth bit her lip. “Sonny—”

“If that can’t be you for whatever reason,” he continued gently without any judgment in his eyes or voice, “then you need to make sure he’s clear on that. You need to let him go to find someone else.”

Friday, May 3, 2002

Oasis: Parking Lot

Jason slid off the bike and eyed the clump of men outside the club. He hated the strip joints Sonny still controlled, but the only thing they could do was be sure they were run fairly and that the women working there were taken care of. Nico had used the Oasis as his headquarters since Frank Smith had put him in charge a dozen years ago, so Jason wasn’t as familiar with this place as he was with the Paradise Lounge.

He recognized only one of the trio smoking cigarettes in front of the entrance. Zander Smith sneered as Jason approached. “Look who’s slumming.”

Jason just stopped and leveled a stare at the idiot. “I’m here to pick up the books from Lenny,” he said. “He inside?”

“I’m not his fucking secretary,” Zander shot back. One of the men looked at the other with an uneasy expression.

“He’s waiting for ya,” the shorter man said, elbowing Zander in the gut. “Knock it off.”

Jason ignored them both before heading toward the entrance. He had the door halfway open when Zander called out again. “How’s your girlfriend, Morgan? Still got her legs glued shut?”

“Fucking death wish this one’s got,” he heard one of the men mutter.

“Smith,” the other hissed. “Shut the fuck up!”

Jason turned, debating what to do, if anything. If Zander had been alone, Jason might have simply ignored him. But to let a slur pass against Elizabeth was to send a message to the men next to him—to anyone who worked on Nico’s crew—that she was open game.

She may not be his girlfriend, but no one in this organization was going to treat her like trash.

Calmly, Jason strode toward Zander and was unsurprised when the scum began to retreat rather than hold his ground. When Zander was against the wall of the building, Jason’s hand shot out and pinned him there by the neck.

“I’m sorry,” Jason said coolly. “Did you say something to me?” He squeezed a moment, feeling the satisfaction as Zander’s dark eyes, seething with hatred, bulged slightly, his cheeks flushing with the effort to breathe.

“Go to hell,” Zander managed.

“Go get Lenny,” a voice behind Jason hissed.

“What was that?” Jason demanded. “You want to try again? What did you say?”

“Nothing,” Zander muttered finally. Jason released him, and the younger man collapsed to the ground, panting.

“Tell Nico and Lenny that they can send their books to the warehouse,” Jason said, turning the man who remained. “And they should rethink their welcoming committee.”

Without sparing a glance for his sister’s ex-boyfriend, Jason returned to his bike and climbed on. Maybe it was time to do something more permanent about their Zander Smith problem.

Saint Andrews Academy

When Michael trudged out of the double doors of his private school, Elizabeth stepped away from the parent whose small talk had threatened to bore her to death. His small features were etched in misery, his book bag dragging behind him.

“Hey, kiddo.” She flashed a smile at the teacher’s aide who returned the gesture before turning to the next kid she was handing off to a parent or guardian. “Have a bad day?”

“Hey, Liz,” Michael said. He blinked up at her, his dark brown eyes shaded by the blond hair they’d forgotten to trim. She slid her hands through it to brush it out of his eyes. “Grammy had to work?”

“Yep.” She reached the bag at his side and slung it over his shoulder. “We’re going back to the Brownstone to have snacks and hang out until she gets home. What do you want for dinner?”

“Nothing.”

She eyed him carefully as they crossed the manicured lawns back to her beat up car, but let it go for now. Michael, despite the turmoil of his life, was generally a good-natured kid. If something was bothering him, eventually he would cough it up. They had several hours before Bobbie’s shift ended.

She tossed his back in the front seat and checked to make sure his booster seat was firmly attached. “How about a movie?” she offered. “We can stop on the way home and rent something.”

“I guess,” he replied with a sigh.

“Video games then?” She slid into the driver’s seat and started the car. “I’m sure we can get Lucas to set up his Sega or Playstation downstairs.”

“Maybe.”

Elizabeth bit her bottom lip. “Michael, did something happen at school? Did you have a fight with someone in class?”

“No.” But after a moment, he spoke again. “Liz, am I too much work for Grammy?”

Elizabeth drew up to a red light and glanced at him in her rear-view mirror. “Of course not. She loves you. We all do.”

“’Cause I don’t wanna be a burden.”

“Burden?” she echoed. What the hell? How did a five-year-old even know what that word meant? Who the hell was talking to him? “Michael—”

“He said he was my grandfather, and I was gonna live with him soon. I don’t wanna leave Grammy, Liz, but maybe she don’t want me anymore.”

Elizabeth pulled over at the next parking lot, and twisted in her car to face the sullen boy. “What happened at school today?”

These feelings won’t go away
They’ve been knockin’ me sideways
I keep thinking in a moment that
Time will take them away
But these feelings won’t go away
– Sideways, Citizen Cope

---

Thursday, April 25, 2002

Brownstone: Kitchen

“I loved my daughter,” Bobbie murmured, “but I’m not sure I ever understood her.” She stirred her tea a bit restlessly. “To set up a scene like that—”

Elizabeth bit her lip, her heart aching for Bobbie, but she was unsurprised to learn that the reading of Carly’s will had been a disaster. Carly had designed it for shock value — in the event she passed before Michael was an adult, she asked that Edward and AJ be invited to the reading of her will along with Jason, Sonny, and Bobbie.

Not there had been any surprises—Even Elizabeth knew Carly had set up a trust for Michael with Jason and Bobbie as executors, that Jason had been left guardianship, but…

“I know Edward can be difficult,” Bobbie continued. “He’s cantankerous, stubborn, arrogant—but he didn’t deserve what she wrote. What she said about him.”

“Is Jason legally bound to what Carly wrote?” Elizabeth asked. “To state that Michael is to never have a single piece of contact with anyone in the Quartermaine family before his eighteenth birthday—can that even be enforced?”

“No, not likely.” Bobbie shook her head. “Jason and Alexis are meeting about it today, but it just makes this situation more tense. AJ hasn’t filed yet, but I know he wants visitation at the very least, and truthfully…”

“You’ve considered it,” Elizabeth murmured. “You know that’s why Carly didn’t leave you guardianship.”

“I’m too soft, she used to tell me. But, yes, I’m sure she knew that my loyalty isn’t hard and fast. I often tried to get her to soften her stance on the Quartermaines.” She touched Elizabeth’s hands. “But I’m worried that Jason may dig his feet in the sand over this. Has Emily spoken to you about the fallout after his accident?”

“In some ways, but I know Jason…” She bit her lip. “He’d never admit it, but I think he felt rejected by them. They kept looking at him, wanting him to be this other person. Wanting him to be their idea of who Jason used to be. And the more they pushed, the more he drew away.”

“When you add in the fact that the one trait all Quartermaine men possess is their stubborn nature—it’s just become worse since Jason went to work for Sonny. Edward saw him denying all the advantages their family offered. And when this business with Michael happened—”

“It made everything even worse.” Elizabeth bit her lip. She didn’t want to be involved. She didn’t want anything to do with this, but she could feel herself being sucked in anyway. “Bobbie—”

“I feel awful asking this, but I don’t think Jason will listen to me about this.”

“Bobbie—”

“You have influence with Jason. You may not want to see it, but—”

“No, not—”

“You do.” Bobbie squeezed her hand. “Jason has to see that a long drawn out custody battle isn’t in anyone’s best interest. He may drag Michael through this and lose—”

“I can’t ask him to change his mind about AJ,” Elizabeth cut in, her tone sharp. “Don’t ask me to use what little connection I have with Jason to do that. I know AJ isn’t a bad person, I know how much he’s worked on himself, but I can’t pretend Jason’s fears aren’t real—”

“I just want Jason to be realistic about his chances. Elizabeth, if you care about Jason—”

“I have to get to work.” Elizabeth got to her feet. “I’ll talk to him, Bobbie. But this has to be his decision.” She bit her lip. “Did you tell Jason that you wanted him to make a deal with the Quartermaines? Does he know this is how you feel?”

“I mentioned it at the reading,” Bobbie admitted. “Just…be his friend, Elizabeth. He needs someone on his side.”

The trouble was, Elizabeth though as she left the kitchen and grabbed her purse from the front room, that she couldn’t very keep her distance from Jason and preserve a light, superficial friendship with him if she was constantly feeling pressured to be more.

And it was important that she stayed light and easy this time. Like the first few months of their friendship—she couldn’t afford anything more.

Not now. And not ever again.

Alexis’s Office

“You don’t think I’d win in court,” Jason said after a long moment, tossing his copy of Carly’s will on Alexis’s desk. “You agree with Bobbie.”

“I have to be honest with you,” Alexis said, her eyes understanding. “I think it depends on the next few weeks. At the moment, AJ is sober, with a good, steady job. A stable marriage to a perfectly lovely young woman. He comes from a well-respected family. Yes, he’s had issues with alcohol before but nothing on his record. You can bring up the accident, but that’s six years ago and he was never charged.”

“Because the Quartermaines covered for him—”

“When you add in the fact that AJ voluntarily surrendered his parental rights in order to give Michael a stable life after not being involved for so long, it makes him look like he has Michael’s best interests in heart. He hasn’t filed yet, he’s giving Michael space—”

“And the next head he bashes into a rock might be Michael’s,” Jason said, his teeth clenched. “Only he might not ever wake up. Is that a risk you want to take?”

“What we do have on our side is that AJ did agree to give up Michael a year ago. He did allow Carly to have full custody after the divorce. He’s only been in his son’s life for about eight months out of five years.” Alexis hesitated. “However—”

“They’ll mention that first year I was lying about Michael’s paternity, which isn’t going to look good for me.” Jason rubbed his face. “Even if we tried to spin that—”

“AJ could ask Robin to come in from Paris and testify to exactly what you told her about why you were lying. It’ll show you knew.” Alexis bit her lip. “What about character witnesses? Elizabeth Webber lives at the Brownstone. Does she have anything to offer about AJ not being suitable? The two of you are friends, aren’t you?”

“We haven’t really talked about it, but she’s also friends with Courtney, and I think—” He was pretty sure Elizabeth half-agreed with Alexis and Bobbie. She might even think AJ was a good person. She had a soft heart.

But good people didn’t destroy lives.

“Jason, I know how much you care for Michael, and I want to do right by you. I just—I’d be giving you bad legal advice if I told you we had a slam dunk on our hands. We have to hope AJ screws up before this comes to court. Or you have to come to another agreement with him. Supervised visitation—”

“No, I’ll—I’ll figure something out.” Jason rose to his feet. “Thanks, Alexis. I know you didn’t like Carly much, but—”

“I like you,” Alexis said after a long moment. “You’ve always been a good client, Jason. I’ll do my best for you and Michael.” She bit her lip. “And I hate to admit it, but this time—”

“It might not be enough,” he finished. “Yeah, I’m getting that.”

Kelly’s: Dining Room

The beauty of having an actual best friend who knew all the dark places inside, who argued with you when you were lying to yourself was that somehow, she was always on your side.

Elizabeth sighed as she finished relating the conversation with Bobbie to her best friend and hoped they weren’t going to argue again.

“So, what are you going to do?” Gia folded her arms and leaned over the counter. “I mean, Bobbie’s not wrong. There’s, like, no way Jason can win in court. He’s the biological uncle, yeah, but he doesn’t exactly scream stable father.”

“Jason was a great father when he had Michael,” Elizabeth retorted. “Michael should be so lucky—” She stopped and shook her head. “I’m sorry. I didn’t—”

“I challenged your man’s honor. I got what I deserved,” Gia said with a wicked smirk. So maybe they weren’t going to argue today, but Gia would still get her licks in.

“I really hate you.” Elizabeth poured water into a coffee pot as she considered for a moment. “I don’t know. I mean, Jason’s getting the same spiel from Bobbie and Alexis. What could I even add? Am I supposed to make it worse?”

“You’re supposed to be his friend,” Gia said. She tilted her head. “You say that’s all you are now, but you’re not exactly acting that way. Friends get involved when people are about to get their lives shattered. If Jason goes to court, if he loses, that’s it. AJ will never let him see Michael.”

“I know.” And if that happened, not only would Jason lose Michael to AJ again, he’d feel guilty about letting Carly down, about not protecting Michael. And if something happened to Michael because of it…

“You’re going to have to stop pretending you’re going to be able to stay neutral,” Gia continued. “There is no neutral. You can be with AJ and Courtney—and that’s fine. You can be with Jason, that’s fine, too. But you can’t be on both sides.”

“Why can’t I be on Michael’s side?” Elizabeth asked, exasperated. “No one is one hundred percent right here, you know? I think AJ would be insane if he kept Michael from Jason. That’s a connection, a link to Michael’s mother that’s necessary. Important. And Jason’s not wrong for being worried that AJ might not stay sober. That Michael might be put in danger. But—”

“But maybe Jason isn’t thinking about Michael.” Gia shrugged. “AJ’s never hurt Michael as far as we know. Or anyone else, not really. Other than himself.  You know who he did hurt? Jason Quartermaine. He killed his brother. And the man in his place has spent his entire life so far knowing he’s only here, that he’s only in existence because AJ crashed that car. When he pictures what might happen to Michael, he’s thinking about that—about rebuilding his life from the bottom up.”

Elizabeth bit her lip. “I know that people might think Jason is being unreasonable—”

“Who said that?” Gia lifted her brows. “First of all, I think Jason has a fantastic reason to never want to lay eyes on his brother again. Did you not hear the part where I said AJ destroyed Jason’s life? I’ve only lived in Port Charles for five minutes, but I see the way people talk about Jason Quartermaine. It’s the way my mother always talked about Marcus. Why couldn’t I be like my brother? He was smart, kind—he was going places.”

“The way my parents treated Sarah.” Even now, after all these years, she knew Alan and Monica Quartermaine hadn’t really reconciled themselves to the son they had now no matter how much they tried.

“Exactly.” Gia jabbed a finger at her. “It’s easy to look at Jason and only see the hot guy with a fast bike and a lot of money. But he worked his ass off to be someone else. Do you remember when Tony came over the other day and tried to talk Bobbie into cooperating with the Quartermaines? It’s not the first time they had that conversation, based on how much yelling we could hear upstairs. But the way he talked about Jason—the words he used—”

“Tony’s an ass,” Elizabeth muttered. She could still hear the rage, the bitterness in Tony’s voice as he’d called Jason a brain-damaged thug. A nothing. A nobody.  Whatever sympathy Tony had had for Bobbie was clearly not as fervent as his hatred for Jason. He would always loathe the man who had stolen Michael from him. “Gia—”

“I know the way my brother talks about him. He makes him sound like nothing. Anger Boy, right? From before Jason figured out how to control himself.” Gia shrugged. “Jason Morgan has been around for six years, and for every one of those years, he’s been seen as less by the people in this town who should have had some damn compassion for him. I don’t blame Jason for wanting to protect Michael from that. I mean, is he overreacting? Maybe.”

“But, in his heart, he’s still Michael’s father, and that’s his job,” Elizabeth murmured. “Damn it.”

“You’re going to have to get involved, Webber.” Gia arched her brow. “What are you so scared of?”

Elizabeth bit her lip and sighed, because it was pointless to keep pretending there wasn’t more behind her desire to keep her life simple, and Gia knew that better than anyone. And it didn’t serve either of them for her to lie about it anymore. “I think you and I both know the answer.”

“That you’ll find yourself broken and have to rebuild from the ground up all over again for, like, the twelfth time? Yeah. I get it.” Gia leaned forward, a wicked glint in her eyes. “Aren’t you tired of playing it safe?”

“Not even a little bit.” Elizabeth offered her friend a half smile. “I’ll do what I have to do, but it stops there. Jason wants to protect Michael, and I’ll help him do that. But I have to protect myself. No one else will do it for me.”

“As long as you know you’re doing it. I don’t care if you stay away from Jason, Elizabeth. I care if you’re lying to yourself. You’re not doing that, so we can shelve it for now.” Gia reached in her bag, “Now excuse me, I have my last final tomorrow, and I might survive it if I have enough coffee.” She stopped and looked at Elizabeth. “Don’t think this conversation is over. You can play it safe all you want, but you know that’s not going to work for long.”

“Gia—”

“But I do have a final tomorrow, and I have to go worry about my life for bit. I’ll come back to yours when the semester is over.”

Quartermaine Estate: Living Room

Edward Quartermaine was flirting with a heart attack as he raged at his two eldest grandsons. He was berating AJ for ever getting involved with that damned floozy, for Ned for talking him out of filing his own custody suit and just having the temerity to be in this room and not out there fighting for Michael—

“Mark my words, if we wait much longer, Jason will take him out of the country and that will be the end of it,” Edward jabbed his finger at AJ.

“Jason isn’t going to do that,” Ned said, his tone calm. Even disinterested. AJ wondered how his cousin managed to stay detached from Edward’s bullshit. Because he hadn’t grown up in this house? Is that why Ned seemed to escape the worst of the poison?

“Why the hell not?” Edward demanded. “He’s done everything he can to keep that boy from this family—he has legal guardianship—what’s stopping him?”

Ned hesitated and looked to AJ. AJ shrugged. He didn’t know how to explain his own conviction that his brother didn’t intend to steal Michael away in the night. Since the moment the truth had come out, Jason had done everything by the book. He’d gone to court to keep custody, yeah, but when the time came to surrender it, he’d done so.

Except when he’d blackmailed AJ into giving Carly full custody after the divorce, but AJ had himself to blame for that after setting the warehouse on fire. He had deserved that punishment.

It had been Sonny that hung him on the goddamn meat hook and threatened his life for no other reason than Carly wanted him out of Michael’s life for good. But Jason had never threatened AJ’s life.

“Grandfather, I just don’t think Jason would do that,” Ned continued when AJ had nothing to offer. “He wouldn’t do it to Bobbie for one thing.”

“Oh, I’m counting on the kindness of thugs—” Edward dismissed this theory with a wave of his hand.

AJ had heard that phrase, or a variation of it, a thousand times since Jason had gone to work for Sonny. Thug. Criminal. Degenerate. Worthless. And yet, somehow, in this moment—he couldn’t listen to it anymore. He’d reached his boiling point.

“Don’t call him that,” AJ said.

At his grandson’s quiet command, Edward broke off his rambling rage, blinked, and looked at him. “Excuse me?”

“Thug.” AJ swallowed. “That’s why we’re in this mess. Because you—because we drove Jason away. All of us. I may have destroyed Jason Quartermaine, but the reason Jason Morgan isn’t part of this family has very little to do with me.”

“Oh, hell.” Ned closed his eyes. “Here we go.”

“Say that again,” Edward demanded. He strode toward AJ. “Blame me again for this mess—”

“You drove him away. You rejected him. If you hadn’t treated Jason like garbage, if you hadn’t made him feel damaged and like nothing, then maybe he would have told Carly to go to hell when she wanted him to lie—” AJ pressed his lips together and swallowed. “Jason didn’t think much of me back then, but he didn’t hate me. Not me. Not then. It was this family. This house. This suffocation. The constant pressure to be someone we’re not—”

“You and your brother had potential!” Edward boomed. “I just pushed you, tried to make you reach it—”

“You’ve never let me forget that I killed my brother! That I destroyed him! I drank to shut all of you up! And I killed the only member of this family who ever gave a damn about me—” He closed his eyes, his throat tight. “And now that same brother can barely stand to look at me. I’m done looking for your approval. For wanting to be part of this family.”

“AJ—” Ned said, holding his hand out. “Hey. Listen—”

“Why the hell have I tried so hard?” AJ demanded. “What’s the point? You know, I may not agree with the way Jason lives his life, but I sure as hell understand the direction he took. Away. And that’s where I’m going to go.”

He turned on his heel and stalked away, telling himself it was the last time he was ever going to pay lip service to his grandfather. He’d get his son back, and he would make sure Michael knew every day of his life that he was loved just for who he was, and not for who he might be if only he were a better person.

His son would be a better man than his father if it was the last thing AJ did.

Gia and Elizabeth’s Apartment: Living Room

“This isn’t even English,” Gia declared as she slammed her book shut in disgust. “How am I supposed to absorb this in time for a test next week?” Before Elizabeth could open her mouth, Gia stabbed a finger at her. “And do not tell me that if I had kept up with my reading and notes all semester—”

“Hey, I don’t seem to have your problem and I’m a double major,” Elizabeth said sweetly as she highlighted a passage in her textbook. “You think learning the principles of finance in this country is fascinating? You picked your major, suck it up.”

“I don’t even remember why we’re friends,” Gia muttered. She grabbed her coffee mug. “You need a refill?”

“Nah, I think I’m switching to some herbal tea.” Elizabeth rose. “I’ll make it.”

Just as Elizabeth set the tea kettle to boil, there was a knock at their door. Gia scowled. “Didn’t we warn everyone in existence that we were studying this week? I will have someone’s head—”

She yanked open the door and blinked. “Oh. Jason. Hey.”

“Hey.” Jason hesitated as he took in Gia’s pajama pants and tank top. “Is this a bad time?”

“Well, finals are next week and as your friend and mine loves to remind me, I’ve spent too much time partying and not nearly enough with the books.” She sighed. “Webber? You got a visitor!”

“Oh.” Elizabeth bit her lip as she stepped out from the small kitchen area into the living room. “Hey, Jason. Gia and I were just—”

“I should have called,” he said after a moment. He shifted his weight from one foot to another, looking uncertain. “But—”

“No, I was gonna—” Elizabeth said. She glanced down at her jeans and t-shirt before handing Gia a fresh mug of coffee. “Mind if I bail on you?”

Gia waited a beat, wondering why people worked so hard at making themselves miserable. She could see the way Jason was looking at Elizabeth, trying not to let his interest show, and she saw how Elizabeth flushed and avoided his gaze. Idiots. Well, she was going to do her part and kick them out.  “And not have you smugly sailing through your study guides while I drown in reading? By all means, abandon me to educational psychology and constitutional law.”

“You mind if we go outside?” Elizabeth asked Jason as she took her purse and a light jacket off a chair.

“Ah, no.” Jason stepped back to allow her to leave the apartment in front of him. He looked once more at Gia. “Uh, good luck?”

“I’m going to need it,” was the reply as Gia closed the door, but she flashed a smug smile of her own.

Jason followed Elizabeth down the steps and out the side entrance of the Brownstone. She slid her jacket on and turned to him. “What’s up?”

“I didn’t mean to bother you,” Jason said, his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket. “I know how busy you are—”

“Hey. You don’t show up on my doorstep at eight at night without a reason, Jason. We’re friends,” Elizabeth said. And she meant that. She might want to avoid any emotional entanglement with the man, but she would never pretend they didn’t have history.

And she liked that Jason could count on her. She didn’t have so many friends left in the world that she could afford to jettison a loyal one.

He tipped his head toward the road where his bike was parked. “You want to take a ride?”

Elizabeth bit her lip, and almost said no. Talking here, outside her warm, safe home—that was smart. Protected. Climbing on that bike, wrapping her arms around his broad chest, riding close to him—

But he looked concerned, and she knew he was dealing with a blow after losing Bobbie’s support earlier that day, so she swallowed her misgivings. What was the harm in one ride?

Vista Point: Cliff Road

Elizabeth was unsurprised that Jason was taking the turns with a bit less recklessness than she remembered. These were, after all, the last roads Carly had traveled before plunging to her death. She trusted Jason’s driving—she knew he’d never be truly reckless with her along, but still she could feel the difference as they leaned into the final curve before reaching the summit at Vista Point.

But instead of revving the engine to make the last climb, the bike began to rumble and slow. He pulled to a stop in front of the mangled guardrail, and turned off the engine.

Silently, they both climbed off the bike and Jason pushed down the stand, taking the helmet from her.

“You haven’t been back since you came home, have you?” Elizabeth asked softly, her words nearly disappearing in the winds and sound of water rushing as the lake currents swirled below.

“Couldn’t.” Jason turned and looked at the guardrail. At this evidence that Carly hadn’t merely disappeared, but had, in fact, died.

“Bobbie told me about the will reading.” Elizabeth wrapped her arms around her torso as they walked toward the dusty shoulder where Carly’s car had, presumably, hung on the precipice. “I’m sorry.”

“It wasn’t anything I didn’t expect.” Jason braced his hands on the guardrail and looked out over the harbor. “Carly hated the Quartermaines. It was just like her to try to one up them even when she wouldn’t be here to see it.”

Elizabeth bit her lip “Bobbie wanted me to talk to you,” she said.

“I thought she might.” Jason turned, and they continued their silent walk. He’d stopped just short of the turn off for the parking lot for Vista Point’s summit view and park, but neither of them suggested they climb back on the bike and take it to the top.

“I’m supposed to, I don’t know, make you see that it’s going to be painful and there’s no guarantee you’ll even win.” Elizabeth sighed. “I’m not gonna do that, Jason.”

She heard him sigh as they crossed the highway, empty now as it usually was this time of night. There was nothing up this way save for the views at Vista Point, and it wasn’t a popular location anyway. It wasn’t high enough to be truly impressive, and there were more majestic views of the lake and harbor elsewhere in town.

So, she wasn’t surprised to find the parking lot deserted or the see empty benches and walkaways that dotted the summit of the hill.

He was quiet until they sat on one of those benches, the view of the harbor comforting to her even with the Gothic mess of Wyndemere looming out of the mists of Spoon Island.

“Why not?” he asked. “You’re not wrong. Alexis has described in great detail that I’m not likely to keep the guardianship intact when AJ challenges it.”

That thread of defeat, even resignation in his tone, stirred her. Jason didn’t quit. He didn’t give up. “Bobbie means well, and you know Alexis is on your side.”

“What about you?”

She didn’t answer at first, because she could feel, maybe for the first time, that maybe she did have influence over Jason. What if she told him right now that he should give in? That AJ wasn’t all bad, and maybe Jason was being too protective?

“I think you have to do what’s right for Michael,” Elizabeth said carefully. “He’s what matters.”

Jason leaned back against the wooden slats of the bench, stretching his arm along the side. “You’ve spent time with him. What do you think is right?”

He would have to ask the difficult question. “I don’t know,” she said. “He’s a bright little boy, you know? He loves living with Bobbie. He loves Lucas. I mean, the kid is his uncle technically, but Michael looks up to him like an older brother. And Lucas is so good with him. He never had much use for Carly—I can’t blame him there—but he’s been kind to Michael. Whatever happens, I hope Bobbie and Lucas can remain a vital part of his life.”

She waited a moment. “But that’s not what you want me to tell you. You want me to tell you’re right to keep Michael from AJ. That you should fight tooth and nail to keep custody.”

“I want you tell me what you think,” Jason said. He looked at her, his eyes sober and steady. “I’ve been home two weeks, and I’ve seen you. I know you spend time with Michael. That you care about him. But I know you’re friends with Courtney, that you know AJ as her husband and not just—”

“Emily’s older brother.” Or the devastating drunk, but that she left unspoken. Elizabeth hesitated, considering her words. “I can tell you honestly that the AJ I’ve known since Courtney came into his life is the best version. I haven’t seen him slur his words, there’s no hint that he’s drinking. I know he fought with Edward, Alan, and Monica after he married Courtney and stopped going after custody. Courtney isn’t sure, but she thinks that they left the mansion because he wouldn’t leave her. They found an apartment with his savings. He studied hard to get a license to operate a forklift, and as far as anyone knows, he’s doing well at his job.

“But,” she continued, “I’m worried he married Courtney to dig at Sonny. That his motives weren’t altogether pure. He’s been good to her, he treats her well, but I worry that it’s a smoke screen. That if his marriage falters, it might change things. I honestly don’t know, Jason. I worry that his sobriety is temporary. That he still struggles with the Quartermaines. I think we both know they’re a heavy trigger in his drinking.” She leaned against the back of the bench, propping her elbow on the top, and sliding her fingers through her hair. “I honestly can’t tell you what I think should happen.”

“A court may still decide to give him custody.”

“They might,” Elizabeth admitted. “I don’t have a lot of experience with this, but Gia’s been asking some friends of hers who intern in a family law firm. With Carly gone, and without any good reason, a family court judge might err on the side of the father. She said that courts also don’t…they don’t appreciate when one parent goes to extreme lengths to cut a biological parent out of their life, and—”

“Carly did that in spades. Yeah, Alexis mentioned that, and the fact that I helped—” He scrubbed his face. “How long do you think AJ will wait before he files?”

“Honestly? Maybe until Memorial Day. Michael finishes his school year then, and I know part of the reason he’s waited is to give Bobbie space and keep Michael’s life relatively stable. Not having to move during the school year would be a good idea.” She bit her lip. “I’m sorry, Jason. I don’t feel like I’m being much help.”

“You are,” he assured her. “And I’m not mad at Bobbie or Alexis. If I make AJ take this to court, then Michael gets dragged into counseling, into court rooms. He’ll spend weeks talking to people. It’ll upset him. If I do any of that, it has to be for the right reason. I can’t— I can’t do that to him just because I—”

Because he wanted to keep him, Elizabeth finished, but she offered another suggestion so Jason wouldn’t have to admit how much he just wanted to be Michael’s father. “Because it’s what Carly would have wanted.”

“This is harder than I thought it’d be,” Jason admitted. “I thought—when I found out Carly was gone—I knew she’d leave me custody, but I always intended to leave him with Bobbie. I mean, I’d be around if he needed me, but I didn’t expect—” He hesitated, but this time Elizabeth didn’t step in to finish his thought. She had a feeling he was struggling towards a conclusion he didn’t want to admit, but it would be the best thing for him if Jason was the one to articulate this.

“I didn’t expect AJ to be…” He paused again and looked at her, but she wouldn’t do this for him. “Doing well,” he finally managed, which was close enough to the truth.

“You have time to consider this,” Elizabeth told him. “As long as AJ waits to file, you have time.”

“Yeah.” Jason exhaled slowly. “There’s—there’s another reason I came over tonight. Why I wanted to see you.”

Despite herself, her heart began to race slightly. “Oh?” she asked, hating how breathless her voice sounded. “What’s up?”

“Zander,” Jason said, his face tightening. “The other day at Kelly’s—”

“We talked about it,” Elizabeth said dismissively, feeling a mixture of relief and disappointment that it was a mundane reason after all. “He’s an ass.”

“Who might be getting worse,” Jason told her. “I can’t give you many details, but until I came home—Zander was—” He hesitated, probably trying to think of how to explain something illegal to her in a way that wouldn’t sound illegal. “He was up for a promotion.”

A smile tugged at the corner of her lips. “Oh, yeah? A corner office with a view of the harbor?”

Jason, despite himself, offered a half smile. “Something like that. It would have—it would have been lucrative for him. I shut it down. I don’t trust him, and I don’t want him in a position to do more harm.”

“Okay,” Elizabeth drawled. “So that explains why he was pissed at you.” She sighed, sitting up straight and tucking her leg underneath her. “Let me guess, he can’t come at you directly for derailing his climb up the ladder, but harassing me is a handy way to deal with his annoyance.”

“He didn’t know yet for sure that I was…going to block him,” Jason told her. “He probably suspected it, but now he knows for sure.”

“Which means he might amp up his annoying behavior.” Elizabeth pursed her lips. “Yeah, I don’t have time for that in my life. We have a week to week tenant lease on most of the rooms at Kelly’s, except for Lucky, because he’s Bobbie’s family. But I can give Zander a week’s notice.” She looked at him. “Or should I not evict him? If he’s at Kelly’s, you know where he is. You can keep an eye on him.”

“I’d rather he be anywhere but Kelly’s,” Jason admitted, “and I was gonna suggest you might kick him out, but I don’t know if I like giving him a concrete reason to dislike you. Not when he’s already going to be pissed at me. Don’t—don’t do anything about it yet. I’ll put some eyes on the diner. You’ll let me know if he bothers you?”

“I can handle him, Jason,” she started to protest.

“You shouldn’t have to when it has nothing to do with you,” Jason told her, holding up a hand to stop her. “I know he’s not likely to do any serious harm to you. He’s an idiot, but he has enough street smarts to know—” He stopped short, but she wondered at what threat he might have leveled to Emily’s ex-boyfriend if it became necessary. Better she be left in the dark.

“I’ll let you know,” she said finally. “I should be getting home. I have an early class.”