Now I breathe flames each time I talk
My cannons all firin’ at your yacht
They say, “Move on”, but you know, I won’t
And women like hunting witches, too
Doing your dirtiest work for you
It’s obvious that wanting me dead
Has really brought you two together

---

September 2007

She couldn’t remember the last time she’d been filled with this kind of fury — this overwhelming, all-consuming blind rage.

For over a year, she’d been walking around in a fog of lies, guilt, and secrets, twisting herself inside and out to do what she believed was right for her children. She’d done unspeakably horrible things to people who deserved more from her in the name of saving her marriage because she’d been so sure he was the father her boys deserved.

And now, in the middle of the living room that she’d used to dream about calling her own, the last of those blind shields faded away. Elizabeth looked at her husband, at the man she’d pledged to love and to honor and to cherish, and wondered exactly when all of those words had become lies to them both.

“We don’t need to make this difficult,” Lucky said, shoving his hands in his pockets, his tone cool and confident. “The house is mine, you knew that when Dad offered it—but you can take all the time you need if you don’t want to go to Audrey’s—”

“We don’t need to make this difficult,” Elizabeth repeated. “I’m sorry. You just walked in this door, told me you were sleeping with another woman, and now you think you’re going to dictate the terms of walking away from me?”  Her lips curved. “Really? You think that’s how it’s going to go?”

Lucky sighed. “I understand that you’re hurt, but you lied to me—”

“You think I feel guilty because I didn’t tell you I slept with Jason? Hey, let’s talk about that night, huh? Do you remember what you were doing? Or should I ask, who you were doing? In our bed?”

Lucky pressed his lips together. “So, what, Maxie was your get out of jail free card—”

“You’re damn right she is. Because my night with Jason was one night. And your affair with Maxie? Continued. Or did you think Nikolas wouldn’t tell me he found you with her in Kelly’s before I filed for divorce?”

He took a deep breath. “Okay, listen—”

“Go on, explain to me why somehow that’s still not your fault. Just like shoving me to the ground, telling so many people that I’d been sleeping with Patrick that Epiphany and Kelly thought he might be Jake’s father.” She folded her arms. “I am dying to know how you’re going to get yourself out of this one.”

“Okay—look, maybe we don’t talk about last year—”

“Why? Isn’t that why you went out and slept with Sam? Revenge for Jason?” Elizabeth stepped closer to him. “Because she made you feel like a man? She paid attention to you? She stroked your…ego? All the things I refuse to do? Isn’t that how it happened?”

“I shouldn’t have had to go to another woman to get some damn affection—” Lucky retorted.   “You’re just angry that I could get it from someone else—”

“I’m angry because I twisted myself into pieces I don’t even recognize to be good enough for you, and I’m asking myself why the hell I ever thought you were worth it.” She tossed her hair back. “You’re not. You are nothing more than a little boy screaming that he’s a man while we all laugh at your face.”

His face was florid. “Shut up—”

“You think Sam gives a damn about you? You think what you have is real?” She snorted, and his flush darkened. “Let me tell you something about Sam. Something I found out a few days ago—she knew Maureen Harper had kidnapped Jake. She watched her do it.”

“No, that’s—”

“And a few weeks ago, she hired men to threaten me and the boys in the park. Did you know that, Lucky? Did you know your precious Sam who makes you feel like a big man is nothing more than a scheming liar out for blood? You didn’t think it was strange that she picked you to be her bodyguard? The husband of the woman Jason slept with? I know you’re not that bright, Lucky, but come on. She reeled you in like a fish on a hook, and you let her.”

“You have no right to talk about her or me like that!”

God it felt so good to say all the things she’d only felt for the last six months—for a year. How she’d made herself into someone Elizabeth didn’t recognize—

“Here’s how this divorce is going to happen, Lucky,” Elizabeth said. “I am going to pack my boys up tonight, and we’re going to a hotel. And then I’m calling a lawyer to file for complete and sole custody. I don’t want a dime of child support from you. You’re getting out of my life, and this time, it’s for good.”

“You think you’re going take my boys from me? You got another thing coming—”

“I think I’m going to take my boys out of this house of lies and forget you ever existed. Cameron’s not your son. He wasn’t good enough for you to get sober for, and he wasn’t enough for you to keep your pants zipped with two different women, so you don’t get to use him now.”

“Jake is mine—”

Elizabeth stopped at the base of the stairs, quirked a brow. “Oh, really? Another thing Sam hasn’t told you. What a shocker. Why didn’t she help us when Jake was kidnapped? Why didn’t she tell anyone about Maureen? Because she knows the truth.”

Lucky stared at her. “Shut up. Don’t say another word. I don’t want to hear—”

“You should have heard it ten months ago. But I thought you were worth the lie. I thought I was responsible for fixing you, Lucky. So I lied to you, and I lied to the world, and I lied to Jason, who never deserved it. You aren’t Jake’s father.”

He took two steps towards her, his hand curling into a fist at his side. “You’re lying now. To hurt me.”

“Am I?” Elizabeth rested her hand on the banister. “Rewind the last year in your head, Lucky, and ask yourself if I’m lying.” Some of the anger had burned away. “I thought I’d feel guilty telling you the truth, that I’d feel awful for what I’d done to you, but all I feel is humiliated for ever thinking you were worth the effort. You’re not worth the breath I’m using to tell you the truth. But, hey, if you really think I’m lying. Go get a paternity test. Pick the doctor. Pick the lab. The truth is what it is.”

“How could you do this? How could you lie to me, to Jason—”

“I didn’t lie to Jason. He’s known for months.” Her voice faltered. “And I will never forgive myself for asking him to let it continue. To let you raise his son as if you were ever the better man. But that’s the only mistake I feel regret for. Any guilt I felt over you died the minute you walked in this door and told me you were having another affair.”

“I want you out of this house.”

“Finally. Something we agree on. I’ll be out in an hour. I’ll send Emily for the rest of my things. I hope you and Sam are happy until she gets bored with her revenge.”

Elizabeth climbed the rest of the stairs, heard the front door slam just as she reached the top, then took a deep breath. Her hands were trembling as she reached into her pocket for her cell phone.  She dialed a familiar number.

“Jason? Are you busy? I have something to tell you.”

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