Update Link: Signs of Life – Chapter 14

I hope everyone’s week got off to a good start. We had a bit of a rainy, bleak Monday and I caught an eye infection to complement all my other health problems (at last count, it was herniated discs in the neck, TMJ, pulsatile tinnitus, tendonitis of the rotator cuff, and bursitis in my left foot), and now my tooth hurts. But that last one is on me — I was supposed to have my wisdom teeth out last summer — but it was scheduled for the day before Lauren’s memorial, so I had to cancel. I figured I’d do it in the summer, and then I lost my insurance. So…we’re figuring it out, lol.

Anyway, forget my health problems, let’s talk about the good stuff 🙂

Crimson Glass turns 21 today! I opened my fanfiction archive on September 19, 2002, and for once I sort of remembered it! Not in time to do anything about it, but I did remember it! I can’t believe all these years later I’m still writing fanfiction for this couple and this ridiculous soap opera. It’s been a crazy journey.  I thought I’d take a walk down memory lane and talk about my writing journey, highlighting writing from different stages of my career to remind myself where I started, and how far I’ve gone.

In the Beginning, 2002-03

I remember sitting in the cafeteria at Camden County College as an 18-year-old kid completely in over their head outside of high school, and failing miserably because I couldn’t quite manage my classes or assignments. I probably should have studied, but I wrote fanfiction instead.  Sometimes I go back and read that early stuff and I cringe, but mostly, I look at it as part of the learning process.  If you’re interested in some of that early stuff, check out some links below:

• The Sisters: The second story, Sweet Revenge, actually contains the earliest writing. I had a story, Deserving, that I rewrote into this series. I never liked this series, and I always wanted to go back to rewrite the summer of 2002.  Bittersweet comes close, but I really still want to rewrite the OG Luis Alcazar story.
• Surviving the Past: Probably my best of the early stuff. It’s overwritten in a lot of areas, and not a great effort at a hybrid AU/AH, but I always think of it fondly.
• When You’re Done: One of my earliest Flash Fictions! The Canvas launched this genre for me, and I think it’s crazy to go back and look at how far I’ve come in writing for 60 minutes.

Figuring It Out, 2003-04

My first foray into college didn’t last very long. I failed out during the spring semester. I really didn’t have the maturity or academic skills to handle college, so I took some time off and went to work in 2004. I kept writing, but I didn’t often finish stories. I was always starting them and losing interest a few chapters in. But I was starting to get a little bit better at writing, I think, and the stories I finished were decent enough.

• Take Me By The Hand: Probably my best writing of this period, written in May 2003. Like a lot of things from this era, it’s underdeveloped in some areas and overwritten in others, but I’m still really happy with it and can reread it without (much) wincing.
• I Shall Believe: Probably my most popular story from this era, written in the fall of 2003. There’s a lot I like about this story — I played with pairings I’ve never written again: Lorenzo/Carly, Brian/Courtney, Lucas/Sage (prior to his coming out). Ironically, I think Liason is probably the pairing that I’m not happy with, but I found my rhythm somewhere along the way.
• She’ll Be Gone: A short story about Faith Roscoe. It got picked up by a GH blog who was searching for Faith’s husband’s first name (I named him Mickey and just kept it forever lol). They said some nice things and I got new readers. I wish I’d saved it!

Returning From My First Writing Break, 2005-2007

I got my job in May 2004, and couldn’t watch GH any more except on Soapnet which I was terrible about. I dipped in and out, but mostly out because 2004 wasn’t a great year for GH, and 2005 didn’t get better. I did write the first version of Mad World (in the Fiction Graveyard now) but mostly stayed on the boards. Then I got a DVR in August 2005 and came back for what ended up being GH’s last golden age with Manny Ruiz, Patrick Drake, Liason’s return, the Zaccharas, Kate Howard, ah, such a good time! And my favorite period of writing because I really think I came back a stronger writer.

• Sanctuary: The second, and better, of my two Scrubs fic. 2006 gave me so many story ideas, and it was a really fun time writing for both couples. Until I got banned at the Scrubs board for defending Liz too, uh, much. (Profanity was involved, if I recall right). I never wrote another Scrubs focused fic, but you know Patrick is never far from my heart.
• The Witness: An absolutely bonkers story that was a lot of fun to write. If I wrote it now, it’d be 50 chapters, lol.
• Daughters: I began this in December 2005, and it’s the only story that I brought back in 2014 and didn’t just rewrite. I made some light edits, then finished the story. One of my favorite AUs.

Going Back To College And Nearly Quitting GH

After the biotoxin story, I was starting to lose interest in GH again. They’d broken up Liason, and I felt like we were heading back to LL2 and JaSam which I was annoyed about because I just felt like there wasn’t story left to tell. Then Claire Coffee (Nadine) left, and Megan Ward was taken off contract (OG Kate). What finally made me dip out for good was Nikolas grabbing Liz and kissing her to prove a point to Rebecca. I just wasn’t at all interested. Plus, I was back in school. I went back to Camden County in the fall of 2008 and turned around my academic life, becoming an honors student. I graduated with my associates in 2009, and transferred to Rutgers-Camden where I stayed until 2013. I didn’t write at all during this period, and after Jake was killed off, I actually felt like I’d never come back. CG went briefly offline when I let the original domain expire, but I tossed it back up on a different site.

And then something strange happened in 2012. I started watching GH again. Because, ha, Frank Valentini and Ron Carlivati were at GH now, and I’d liked their run at OLTL. The irony. I started watching again with the poisoned water crisis. Ron’s writing has its issues, but he mostly made me happy, and I was back in again. But I wasn’t writing yet. That came later. I was too busy with college, friends, family (the siblings started reproducing! Olivia in 2010, Isla in 2012, Nolan (my sister) & Mackenzie (my brother) in 2014!)

Then I moved to London, and I wasn’t with my family anymore, and only had my two best friends. I thought…I’m still watching GH (torrenting back then because Hulu wasn’t available in the UK and didn’t carry GH at that point).

So…now we come to the next chapter.

Writing Again — Sometimes (2014-2018)

When I first started writing again, of course, I started by looking at stories I’d left unfinished and with the exception of Daughters, I decided to start fresh. I rewrote two stories, and started two more longer stories.

• Shadows: I rewrote this story (the OG is in the Fiction Graveyard) and it really gave me the courage to think that I could actually do this again. It was a shorter novella, but I was happy with it.
• A Few Words Too Many: An angsty mess and a rewrite of Poisonous Dreams (also in Fiction Graveyard), it was my first novel and I wrote it in a month. There are definitely pieces I’d rework, and I’d add more of Jason’s POV earlier on, but I honestly love it.
• The Best Thing: I say it all the time, but this one of the best stories I ever wrote it, and until Mad World, it’s my best Sonny story. I really pushed myself to be better writing both Jason and Sonny, and it taught me a lot about both of their characters — and Carly’s.

Full Circle (2018-Present)

Until 2018, I was still writing the way I had back in the old days. Writing a few chapters and posting them. I was doing more prep work and planning before I wrote to ensure I’d finish stories, but I wrote and posted The Best Thing over a period of two years! And Bittersweet — I posted 8 chapters, stopped, posting a bunch more, then stopped — it was that story that told me that I had to change my approach because I stopped to do a massive rewrite of a major story point.

Since Mad World Book 1, I complete everything I write before posting — and I do extensive rewrites and edits. I’d say my novels are slower to go up — but they end up being much better, and sometimes even longer. Plus, with the addition of Flash Fiction, I think we do okay here.

I’m proud of everything I’ve written over these last five years, but I’ll highlight my favorites.

• Mad World: It goes without saying that this is my favorite work, my most ambitious (at least until FMT is done). Four books that began with a narrow focus on the Jason/Elizabeth/Sonny/Carly piece of the world and end up extensively rewriting most of the show. Sometimes I can’t believe I actually did it.
• Death Becomes Her: The first of a trilogy of murder mysteries I wrote for GHWhoDunIt (Death By Moonlight & Karma being the others). These were so much fun to write and plot, even though I definitely went overboard.
• Fool Me Twice: Another insane ambitious project. Book 2 has been a struggle to write, but as I push towards the end of my first round of rewriting, I’m really proud of what I’ve written so far and what I’m trying to accomplish. I might miss the mark, but I’m glad I’m trying.
• Flash Fiction: Everything I’ve written on this page since 2020 when I relaunched this project. In three years, I’ve written SO MUCH and it’s been an absolute blast!

The Future

I don’t know how much longer we’ll have General Hospital in our lives, airing every week day. I want to believe it’s forever because it’s always been there, in the background, always there when I needed something to fill my time. I don’t think we’ll ever see our couple back together the way we deserve, and we certainly never got the story Steve & Becky deserved either. I hope, in some small way, I’ve filled the gap and brought a smile to your face for the last 21 years.

I hope to continue writing my mix of novels and flash fiction, though I’d love to mix in more short stories. (I’m just terrible at being concise! Everything I write ends up being 50 chapters!) If you’ve been with me since the beginning or just found me this year, I love and appreciate everyone.

Take care of yourself and everyone you love. We never have the time we expect or deserve, and you’ll never go wrong telling people what they mean to you in the moment.

See you on Thursday!